Im surprised by how many say they never do it. Im not judging anyone, just interesting.
I pack my husbands lunch everyday for work. I prepare his coffee too. I know many of you said "he's a grown man" and "perfectly capable" but I ENJOY making my husbands lunches. And yes I even write a note telling him to have a great day and I love him etc. Its the way we do things. My husband's an electrician so he eats at the job site and doesn't have time to go out and I like to make sure he's not going hungry. And he appreciates it each and everyday and always thanks me at least twice.
He doesn't expect it. I just like doing that nice thing for him. Grown man or not.
But to each their own :)
Featured Answers
M.B.
answers from
Washington DC
on
Thank GOODNESS it isn't a "how often do you have sex question"... that is a pretty popular question. LOL!
I make my husband's lunch almost everyday he has work. I know that it saves the family money (he doesn't buy any food if I make him lunch), and I like doing favors for him. He does little things for me as well that I could do very well by myself, but why not do cute little thoughtful things for each other? ...and it REALLY helps that I know he is genuinely grateful!
:)
ADDED: THANK YOU 8kidsdad!!! It hasn't a thing to do about "being a big boy"!!! It is a way to show you care and love the person. My husband is actually the most stand-up guy out of all husbands I know personally- he does it all, so technically, doesn't that make him the biggest man of all? It has nothing to do with anything except a loving favor.
I know whenever my husband makes me a sandwich, it tastes better than when I do. Basically we are in love, and that's all there is to it:)
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L.D.
answers from
Dallas
on
Never. But my husband puts coffee in a travel cup for me and makes a piece of toast for me 2-3 times a week.
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A.K.
answers from
Minneapolis
on
My hubby packs ME a lunch! We both work. But I only go to work 3 days a week. So 3x.
He cooks supper too! Yeah!
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K.B.
answers from
Milwaukee
on
everyday!!!! my husband works hard so i can be a stay at home mom. so it's the least i can do for him to show how much i appreciate his hard work!!
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J.W.
answers from
St. Louis
on
Never, he is a big boy. :)
I find all the answers, I make it for him it isn't a matter of him being a big boy, funny. Really making your husband a sack lunch shows you love him? I guess I love my husband more because I don't show my love with something so freaking lame.
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G.H.
answers from
Chicago
on
I did years ago but then I stopped. I stopped because he rarely ate it or he would forget it in the fridge. I figured out that me spending the time to make him his lunch was not his *love language*. I do plenty other things that he truly appreciates.
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A.F.
answers from
Fargo
on
I don't pack my husband a lunch and I love him dearly. 8kidsdad, your statement is manipulative and petty. Packing a lunch may equal love for you and your wife, but it's not a litmus test for all loving marriages. Open your eyes and see that healthy marriages don't have to fit into your narrow view!
edit* I went throught the responses and found that the responses that said they make a lunch every day for their husband got the most flowers. It's funny how people are so stuck in the mindset that food equals love. Momof4 nailed it when she said that packing a lunch wasn't her husband's love language. She's a smart woman to know what expresses love in her marriage and what doesn't!
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J.B.
answers from
Boston
on
Never. It's nice if someone wants to do it for the other person, but adults can prepare their own lunches. As can school-age kids.
Oh and 8kidsdad? Spare me, please. Bringing your wife flowers every now and again is hardly the same as her making you an extra meal day in and day out for years. And that Dr. Laura book is just horrid drivel.
The Love Dare is not at all about treating capable spouses like they're toddlers, or about grown adults expecting to be catered to. Again, it's sweet if someone wants to take this on, but the other spouse should recognize that its a favor and not a duty. It burns me to read about spouses who "expect" to have breakfast or lunch ready for them.
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C.O.
answers from
Washington DC
on
Every day. I even make sure his coffee is ready BEFORE he wakes up.
What does he do for me? I tucks me into bed an scratches my back!!
ETA: I noticed mom's said "I don't he's a man, not a child" - for us? It has NOTHING to do with that - this is the way that OUR MARRIAGE works. Has for 16 years. MY HUSBAND appreciates it. He tells me every day THANK YOU. And some of the guys in his office get "jealous" or "envious" because they love what they see in his lunch!
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B.C.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
My wife used to pack a lunch for me when I had a job where I didn't go out to eat.
She didn't do it because I wasn't capable or wasn't a grown man. She did it to show love.
I bring roses to my wife at work, not because she isn't capable of going outside and cutting the flowers herself or isn't capable of calling a flower shop and having them delivered. I do it because I love her.
"A friend in need is a friend in deed." I show my wife my friendship and love by my deeds.
I would suggest that those that don't have enough love for their husband to pack a lunch for him (or visa versa) to read the book, "The Love Dare" and watch the companion movie, "Fireproof". The book "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" is a real good relationship book too and has nothing to do with breakfast, lunch or dinner.
Good luck to you and yours.
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L.U.
answers from
Seattle
on
Never. If my husband wants to pack a lunch then he is more than welcome to do so. Kind of like when *I* pack a lunch for myself and the three kids when we go to the park. I don't ask him to get up early and pack all our food! It's my "job" to be at home with the kids and take care of them and the home. It is not my job to do my husband's laundry, pack his lunches, or anything else that he is perfectly capable of doing.
L.
(and can I just say....after almost 10 years of marriage and three children this has worked pretty well for us. I am not my husband's mother I am his wife...there is a difference.)
Edited to ADD - Man 8kidsdad, sometimes I am with ya, and sometimes I wonder about ya. Because I don't pack my husband's lunch does not mean that I do not have enough love for him. In fact, the fabulous way I raise our children, the way I keep the house clean, the way I make his favorite dinners, the way I go to his soccer games and cheer him on, the way I assist him in coaching my son's soccer team, the way I buy his favorite aftershave/soap/hair gel, the way I love his family, the way I make sure to buy his favorite nuts/cereals/meat, the way I love on him when the children are finally in bed......THOSE are the ways that I show my husband I love him. He can make his own lunch and still know that there is a good woman waiting for him at home.
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J.M.
answers from
Missoula
on
I make hubby's every day that he works. Of course, he works a late shift, and stays up late (early?) enough to get up with our DD while I'm in class... so he sleeps as close as he can to the time he has to leave, which still isn't enough. So I do what I can to help him out.
Besides, he REALLY sucks at making sandwiches (probably on purpose. lol), and I would wind up doing more work cleaning up his mess than I do making him a sandwich myself. lol.
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X.O.
answers from
Chicago
on
Never. He is lucky enough to have lunch brought to him daily by various sales reps. They feed his whole office.
ETA: When he was still in residency (and I was doing my student teaching or working FT), I did pack his lunch every day, and for the days that he was on-call, meaning, in the hospital for over 24 hours, I packed several meals for him to take with, and made sure that when he arrived home at the end of his on-call shift I'd have a big breakfast waiting for him. I could have just said, "Well, I work too," but really, that would be selfish of me. I had to make my own lunch anyways, so why couldn't I make the same for him?
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S.B.
answers from
Kansas City
on
Never. My husband gets up more than an hour before I do for work. I don't even pack the leftovers after dinner (which is what he usually takes) because that's part of his job on after dinner clean up. (I cook, he cleans.)
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M.G.
answers from
Seattle
on
I typically never do. He can choose from leftovers if we have them or whatever else he wants. I only pack lunches for my children during the school year. He's grown and can take care of himself.
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J.D.
answers from
Cincinnati
on
I used to pack husbands and mine every day but he decided he missed the socialization of going out to lunch with work buddies so i just pack mine now.
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T.S.
answers from
San Francisco
on
LOL never! My husband hates to take a lunch from home. He works in an urban area so he likes to get his fix of Greek, Thai, Vietnamese, etc. It drives me crazy, it's SUCH a waste of money. When I was working I packed a lunch almost every day. Even now I usually eat leftovers for lunch, and I rarely eat out during the day (old habits die hard!)
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J.E.
answers from
Erie
on
Not often. He's a big boy, he can pack a lunch if he wants it. He usually doesn't eat during the afternoon though because he doesn't get hungry. If he does, he usually snags a lunch out of the vending machine at work (they have sandwiches and stuff). I probably would pack him one if he wanted one....if he actually helped me around the house or with the kids every day. But, he works 7-3:30pm every weekday and I work 24/7 except for when I'm asleep. So, yeah...he can pack it himself ;)
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M.C.
answers from
Houston
on
My husband works close enough to our house that he comes home everyday for lunch.
So I don't pack him one, but I cook him one!
I cook breakfast, lunch, and dinner everyday - its just what I do!
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J.K.
answers from
Kansas City
on
5 days a week, and he is high maintenance. I make salads with lots of veggies in them, cut up fruit, make protein shakes, rice bowls. Sometimes more, sometimes a little less. I hate it too, but I know that he wants to eat healthy and have good food available to him when he wants to eat. He is usually gone for 14 hours at a time. And he helps me out lots too, most of the time.
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☆.A.
answers from
Pittsburgh
on
Never. He's all grown up. He packs the leftovers or makes himself a sandwich, etc.
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M.M.
answers from
Dallas
on
My husband makes all of our lunches during the school year.
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J.A.
answers from
Indianapolis
on
Never.
he's a grown man, not a child.
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K.M.
answers from
Kansas City
on
Never. And, he packs our son's lunch for school, too:)
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K.M.
answers from
Denver
on
I make a lunch for my husband for any day that he is working. (4-5 days).
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S.B.
answers from
Dallas
on
Almost daily. But it's only because he takes leftovers and I simply pack them up when I am cleaning up after dinner. On days he wants a sandwich or something "different", he usually takes over for the day.
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A.W.
answers from
Chicago
on
Mine works overnights 4 nights a week so I pack his "lunch" on those nights. I make coffee and make his food while he's taking a shower and getting ready. Way I see it is he works all night while I get to sleep- least I could do is make his lunch. Esp. since most of those nights he gets off of work, comes home to change, and goes to his day job. (Between the two he's working about 70 hours a week). It also gives me a chance to slip little notes into his lunch to tell him I love him or appreciate how hard he is pushing himself to get us out of the financial hole we're in by himself so I can concentrate on school.
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K.I.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
If and when we have leftovers he would like to eat for lunch the next day, I will pack it up for him...but he usually buys himself microwaveable food (that he grabs himself) or eats out...so its not that often?!
*But I do make him coffee every day and lay out his clothes for him when he is in the shower!
*Not because he is not capable...but because I want to...I also sit and talk with him and watch him get dressed every morning and LOVE to sit and watch him shave too...SO SEXY!
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R.R.
answers from
Dallas
on
The most I do is occasionally put leftovers in a dish for him to grab the next day. Possibly once a month. I have to get my lunch AND our son's lunch ready, he is perfectly capable.
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L.S.
answers from
Spokane
on
He normally takes leftovers, so I'll make sure they're ready for him to grab the next morning - he leaves before we're up. If there aren't leftovers I always offer to make him something, but those are the days he'll often grab lunch with co-workers or something.
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T.C.
answers from
Austin
on
I pack my husband a container of fruit for breakfast almost every morning. Some days I make it the night before, sometimes I don't wake up in time to pack anything, other days I have extra time and make him a sausage egg muffin. He's on his own for lunch, whether he comes home at lunch and has a tuna sandwich, or goes out to eat with coworkers.
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S.H.
answers from
Honolulu
on
My husband does not take home lunch to work currently.
At one time he did... but he made it himself.
Why?
Because the thing is, I can't "predict" what he will want to eat in that home lunch, nor does he, until the last minute.
So even if I did pack it for him, he at the last minute, feels like eating something else.
Therefore, HE makes and made, his own home lunch.
Because only he, will know what he wants to pack, THAT morning for lunch later.
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A.K.
answers from
Bloomington
on
It depends , we usually pack lunches , make dinner , & clean up together.
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H.W.
answers from
Portland
on
Never. He makes his own pb&j and banana each day... he likes it. When I try to send him with leftovers or such, he appreciates it--but usually, he forgets what I packed for him because he's on autopilot. Sweet guy-- he sure likes his routines!
ETA: I'm a bit confused by the idea that I wouldn't 'love my husband enough' to pack a lunch for him. When we both worked, he NEVER packed a lunch for me. I didn't think it was lack of love.... wow....guess I just didn't work hard enough to read a bunch of negative BS into it. People shouldn't pass off opinions about other people's marriages because of something as trivial as packing a lunch. Good grief... And I do make dinner nearly every night. Maybe I only love him in the evenings...yeah, that's it!
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C.M.
answers from
Washington DC
on
I do it every night for him. It's either left overs from dinner or I make him something else if we don't have left overs
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N.P.
answers from
San Francisco
on
My husband takes lunch from home every day. We can't afford to have him go out and eat right now. I'll usually cook extra for dinner and he'll Tupperware it up to eat the next day for lunch. If dinner is "leftover night" he'll grab a frozen teriyaki rice bowl (yay costco!) and a piece of fruit to have the next day. Sometimes I pack it up, but most of the time he takes care of it while I'm clearing up the mess from dinner.
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S.T.
answers from
Washington DC
on
sigh. every day. a green smoothie and some sort of wrap or sandwich. and set up his morning coffee.
when i was working i didn't. but now that i'm not, i figure it's a small thing i can do to help him out. he works so, so hard.
but i'm lazy and usually sulk while i'm doing it.
:) khairete
S.
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S.T.
answers from
Houston
on
I pack my husbands lunch every day. A chicken salad, a snack, a drink, and a dessert.
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C.T.
answers from
Santa Fe
on
Never - he does it himself. He usually takes a tupperware of leftovers or he has a stash or apples and nuts and other goodies in his office. Occasionally he eats in the cafeteria at work.
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☆.H.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Never. His company has a spectacular (and heavily subsidized) cafeteria on site.
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J.S.
answers from
Columbia
on
about once to twice a week. Sometimes just a protein shake, usually some fruit or leftovers (esp pasta).
She's knocked up, so I want to help her eat right. :)
______________________________
just read your SWH - that's awesome. I struggle with the doing it "for" her as codependence or loving gift. I try more to be like you and see it as a loving gift... lol, usually right up to the moment I go to her office and see 18 cans of V8 I had previously packed unopened. (she swears she likes them)
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S.G.
answers from
Chicago
on
Almost never. He has a lunchbreak long enough for him to get something quick from out or otherwise he packs one himself. The only exception is if he is not feeling well but can't take off work for an important meeting or something.
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J.B.
answers from
Rochester
on
4 out of 5 days. On Thurs he goes out to lunch with the boys.
And I have been doing this since we graduated college over 10 years ago.
and sometimes....I even put in a little note :)
Now, certainly...there are some mornings I just plain forget too.
How often do you?
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N.G.
answers from
Dallas
on
I never make his, he makes mine when I ask him when to, which is only when I'm running late.
When I was a SAHM, I made his lunch for him every single day.
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A.C.
answers from
Washington DC
on
never ... never have ... never will.
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J.C.
answers from
Rockford
on
I'm the one home, so I do it. My husband works second shift, so I get his lunch ready every work day and pack a dinner for him for every work night. I like doing it because I can feed him healthy stuff and use up leftovers or whatever needs to be used. A lot of times he gets the other guys jealous with what I pack him. But, he does get teased when he brings mac & cheese, lol! I don't do it to show love, but because I want to and I enjoy it. If I didn't pack his dinner, he wouldn't accuse me or think I didn't love him, lol!
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S.D.
answers from
St. Louis
on
Oh good GRIEF...Ya'll are getting pretty nasty about packing LUNCHES?? REALLY???
Some couples enjoy doing "little" things for each other. You may not agree and that's fine. Each couple is different, and what qualifies as a loving gesture may be different. There is nothing wrong with a woman or man making the lunch of their loved one. If you don't wanna great, if you do, great. Stop being so nasty people. Your nastiness is beyond LAME JoW.
I rarely will pack my hubby's lunch. Sometimes we will have leftovers and I will put them in a container for him, otherwise he eats out or takes various things he preps. I can TOTALLY see the love in making a lunch. My mom was a SAHM and I remember her making my Dad's lunch. Was he capable? OF COURSE, its just something she did for him and it created a nice memory for me.
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A.G.
answers from
Dallas
on
Never. My husband and I have been very happily married for 18 years, and show our love for each other all the time. We just don't make lunch for each other. (to 8kidsdad)
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F.H.
answers from
Phoenix
on
never. He eats on the go or at home if he's here.
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M.R.
answers from
Chicago
on
Every work day. I stay at home, and he leaves at a relatively relaxed time for work (9.00 am plus), which gives me a lot of time in the morning to make him a quick lunch.
I don't do it because he can't suck it up and eat out, or because he'd do the same if our roles were reversed, or because I feel guilty staying at home and he does all the hard work.
I do it because, the kitchen, cooking and cleaning is my responsibility in our home, and making his lunch is a part of it. To help me, he adjusts and gives me sufficient time and organizational help around the house.
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L.A.
answers from
Austin
on
Never. I would if he asked.
I do ask and then purchase what he would like for the week, but he prepares his own.
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L.M.
answers from
Chicago
on
Not once have I ever done this. My husband's office has a cafeteria that makes great food at reasonable prices so that's what he does everyday. Even if he didn't have this, I wouldn't pack him a lunch. He's a grown man and I have to pack lunches for the kids.
Although sometimes I'll send something off with him - a bag of chips, cookies, candy (after Halloween!) etc I don't want to eat after all.
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C.C.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
When I'm working and in school he usually does it, otherwise I do.
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S.R.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
We both work, we are each responsible for our own lunches. He does his own ironing for work too. Occasionally we help each other out with these tasks if we prearrange ahead of time.
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C.C.
answers from
San Francisco
on
He likes to have a smoothie for lunch, so he gets his own while he's out and about (his job involves a lot of driving, so he passes Jamba Juice stores everywhere he goes). I doubt a smoothie would still be a smoothie by lunchtime even if I did make it at home!
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C.M.
answers from
St. Louis
on
If I am cooking on the weekends (when he works) I'll package up a few meals for him - so I'd say I do it 6x a month (but he's only at work 12 days a month).
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A.C.
answers from
Atlanta
on
About once a week, when I make lunch for my son for camp. He makes it the other 4 days (and he makes my son's lunch for his other day at camp, too).
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C.W.
answers from
Phoenix
on
every once in a while......he gets up before me and alot of times has made it the night before.
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A.S.
answers from
Iowa City
on
My husband comes home for lunch so I prepare or pick up something for him and the children daily.
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J.G.
answers from
Chicago
on
Never. I would, but he refuses to eat a packed lunch.
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K.F.
answers from
Cleveland
on
I wish my husband would take a lunch to work! I would gladly pack it for him. He either goes out to lunch with customers or co-workers every day. I do make his coffee every morning. If I worked he would probably do it himself.
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H.M.
answers from
Dallas
on
Nope I don't think I ever have for him for work. And here lately he's been getting mine together of course he has only worked 4 days this month. So right now he's a sahd not by choice but he does enjoy being home with the boys. If we could afford it he would love to say home with them while I work. But he's got to find something soon!!!
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R.B.
answers from
La Crosse
on
never.
I get home from work between 11:30pm-1am. He gets up at 4am to leave for work. Im sorry and not trying to be selfish but at that time I'm out with me sleeping.
But.. on the other hand, I have offered to make it for him when I get home so its ready to go for him when he gets up.. but he doesn't like his sandwiches sitting in the fridge for that long, then a cooler before he is able to eat it. He doesn't like the way the bread is, its either soggy if I put mayo on it at night or hard with out it. So he does it himself when he gets up. There is no coffee in our house.. he grabs a Mtn. Dew on his way out.
Like with the note you put in his lunch box... I will a couple times a week leave a little note telling him how much I love him on a sticky note and leave it on the bathroom sink for when he gets up. With our different work schedules we can sometimes go a few days with out seeing each other, awake anyways.
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E.A.
answers from
Erie
on
Rarely, but only because he works in a restaurant.
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J.W.
answers from
Philadelphia
on
Never. We've both always worked and packed our own stuff. He wakes up almost an hour earlier than me.
I do make lunches for my kids. They are old enough to do it themselves but it's one little thing I can do to make their mornings less hectic and I don't mind.