My son's 8th Birthday is around the corner. We are having our standard family and close friend party at our house, but he really wants to do something with his classmates. My mom has agreed to let us do a kid's chef party at her restaurant and they can make their own pizzas and decorated cupcakes ect. I was thinking like 8 school friends were more then enough. So after making a list I realize that a few of his good friends aren't on the list and he is a little upset because he is having to choose. Would I be crazy to let him invite 12. How many kids do you let your children invite to their parties?
I have had close to 20 for my son's 7th at a sports complex with lots of room! Once he makes a friend, he keeps a friend :-) so it's hard for him to narrow it down.
Remember that it's extremely unlikely that all 12 kids would come. I say go ahead and invite them. You'll probably end up with 8 anyway.
I don't think 12 is outrageous, as long as the adult to child ratio is balanced. If the kids are going to be cooking, I would want no less than 1 adult to 3 kids. That'd be 4 grown-ups-you, your mom, your SO, and one other. I think 12 is fine as long as you have enough adults.
No you wouldn't be crazy to invite 12 kids. Our parties always began with the six kids in the house and grew from their. The determining factor was always how many kids our kids would invite to their parties. If I was doing a Christmas Party for the kids then each kid could invite 3 guests then I would end up with 24 kids at my house. Loads of fun but I do keep the fun structured and set a specific time frame for the party not more than 4 hours. I'm also careful with the sugar aspect of the party being certain that cake and icecream and goody bags all came towards the end of the party just before they left my house. ;-) Loads of fun has been had by all. The kids are now 22 years old down to 16 but they still fondly remember the parties. They now host a superbowl party and invite me to come and have fun with them. That's the best watching them work together on a party.
I really resist the urge to invite a zillion kids. It's expensive and it can get out of hand. I didn't want my child going to a party every couple of weeks, and I didn't want him getting a slew of presents - parties turn into greed-fests. We followed the "age" rule - at 5, he got 5 friends, at 8, he got 8 friends. Unless he wanted to do something expensive, then he had to cut the list down - like if they wanted a movie and lunch out, then it was 4 kids. Them's the breaks!
Life is about choices and he needs to learn to make them. Maybe you can have a few more since your mom owns the restaurant and may cut you a break financially, but think about it overall and what standard you will be setting for next year.
Who are the 8 kids on the list, if his good friends aren't on it? Really try to look at it objectively. And think about what you're going to do next year if he doesn't have to make some choices THIS year! This is going to get bigger and bigger.
For us, the number of kids depends on the place we choose, and what kind of party my kids choose. My older daughter used want a bunch when younger, and fewer as she got older. My younger daughter has always preferred a smaller number of guests. We've never done "the whole class" And we consider if we're having a big family party, keeping the friend party smaller, and vice versa, or JUST a friends or a JUST family party, just so we aren't overwhelmed. Some places are easier than others for larger groups. I would talk to your Mom and ask her opinion. If you invite more, like others said, make sure you have plenty of adults to help supervise. I don't think 12 is too crazy. 20-30 would be too crazy for me. Have fun!
12 is fine, at 8 I think I had 22 kids!! They do get smaller as they get older. Now we have about 7 or 8. Whats another 4 kids!
At our school they have a rule that you have to either invite the whole class, or all the girls or all the boys. I hate this rule , which is why we only invite our friends children. So it ends up being 4 or 5.
Our parties tend to get smaller as the kids get older - I think that at age 8, my older kids were still inviting all of the boys or all of the girls in their class plus any friends who were not in their class, so 12-20 kids invited and usually 10-15 would attend. Expand the list so that his good friends aren't excluded - kids talk about parties and you don't want to hurt someone who was left out. As they get older, they get more choosy about who they invite and the kids understand that they don't all get invited to every party so it's not a big deal.
12 sounds great to me... it's also unlikely that all 12 would be able to come. Typically plan on 2/3s- 3/4s of invitations to be accepted.
When my son was in preschool, we just invited the whole class. As he's gotten older I send out a "what date would work better for you?" email to his closest friends (giving them a couple options), then invite however many. Usually around 10. Because we have the present confirmations, we know that no matter what (barring flu, etc.) that his besties will be there. So whether it's 4 or 15, we have a good time.
In our family we try to stay close to 20. I really do not limit them to a smaller # since we told the kids the parties stop when they are 10 yrs. old. Once they are 10 we will celebrate with their friends on a much smaller scale. We will let them pick 5-6 of their best friends and do something special- dinner, water park, go garts, batting cages, whatever the birthday child chooses. Seeing as though parties for us started at age 3, they only get 7 big parties.
My son is turning 8 at the end of the month. After looking up every kid's party place in a 20 mile radius to get the lowest price (there isn't one, all places averaged out to be about $270 with 15 kids and $10 for each additional kid), a friend told me to check out the church gym. I did and got lucky in that the gym is only $30/hr so I booked the gym. Initially I was having a rough time trying to limit him to just 15 friends. He has about 20 kids in his class, plus the 8 from scouts, and half of his football team, 3-4 kids from baseball over the summer, the neighbor kids, 1-2 from sunday school, not to mention my friends' kids who are close to his age. Trying to narrow that to 15 was next to impossible, and I haven't even covered family members. When I was able to get the gym, I decided to invite everyone since I'm only paying $60 for the gym for 2 hours. I ended up sending out 30 invitations and I'm guessing that a litttle over half will show. As long as I get people to RSVP, I will be fine thuough. So as long as you have enough food- which should be easy since it's your mother's restaurant, you should be fine. Hope it turns out well. Good Luck.
I disagree with the ladies who suggest that the parties will just continue to get bigger and bigger. Ours have actually gotten smaller over the years. My son is 12 now, and they tend to like just their close friends around. But then, neither of my kids ever really care how MANY kids were there, so long as their really close friends were. So the past couple of years it has been a "pick a friend and we'll ___"... Go to the water park or the beach or whatever... Our kids have summer birthdays, so there is lots to choose from.
I'm sure in a few more years, when he really hits the "teen" years full speed, that there'll be some larger group parties for various things... but not likely for birthdays. Except maybe the 16th, lol.
I would absolutely let him invite all the kids he wants - I especially would not exclude his good friends. At this age, most of the parties my daughter who is 8 goes to the entire class has been invited ! However, I've found that ends pretty soon and by around age 10 the parties turn much more intimate - the kids themselves get sick of these big parties - my older daughter has asked to only have 2 or 3 of her best friends now. So now is his time - let him do it if you can afford it - because you really don't have to worry about doing it forever. When my husband was growing up, they had the "age rule". You got to invite as many kids as the age you were turning - so if you were turning 8, you'd invite 8. If you were turning 9, you'd invite 9. I used to think that was a wonderful rule - UNTIL I had kids and realized that's backwards. As they get older they want fewer kids - just 1 or 2 best buddies, and when they're young, it's too hard to pick and too many feelings are hurt. So I wouldn't recommend the age rule.
Invite all 12...there's no guarantee that all of them will be able to attend, but don't leave anyone out. Your mom sounds great! It should be a fun party...enjoy!
You are absolutely not crazy to let him invite 12. A birthday is very special and should be celebrated! There is no "right" number:)
I used to invite the entire class and a few extra friends that weren't in their class, so total invites 25, and never had more than 12 attend.
