How Many Blessings Can You Handle?

I like having a big family because I did not have one. I wish I had a brother or sister. When I am gone they will always be there for each other. I have good kids why not populate the world with more good kids lol. Seriously I started out with 1 kid when he was 2 I had another, then I met my husband and he head 2 kids he had full custody of. Now we have one together and would love to have more.

Hi J.!! I also have three kids- ages 3, 2 and almost 5 months. It is definitely more of a challenge, but so much more fun I think! Mine are extremely close in age, so I have found the hardest part is trying to give everyone as much time as possible. I have had to "let things go" like laundry and having a spotless house. I *try* to not stress out too much about backing up on laundry or cleaning the house. I am very fortunate to stay at home with them but realize that it is important for ALL of us for me to have a little break to recharge. I try to hit the gym a few days a week which allows me not only some time to work out but some time to just catch my breath and think.
I have been very lucky that my oldest two are like built in playmates. Don't get me wrong, they have their moments. I grew up where it was my brother and I and we had fun, but always thought it would be fun to have another kid around!! (My husband was the same!) We are outnumbered which can be tricky, but so worth it. I love a busy house and lots of activity so it works for us and we love it!
Good luck! A.

Hi J.,

Right now I only have 2 boys, ages 2 years and 8 months. For me, the decision to go from 2 to 3 children is that I just do not feel complete, I don't feel like I'm done. I had always told my husband that I wanted 4 children but he hopes that I stop at 3, which I could! I think that it all depends on what you see your family as complete.

I love my boys more than anything and I am blessed to be able to stay at home with them and have a great work at home career. My husband's work schedule is a bit different being a firefighter but we love the time with our children.

I think the best thing to do is pray about it and go from there. I hope that it works out the best way possible!

Good luck with your decision!

L.

Hey J.,

My husband and I have three girls 12, 7 and 3. The 12 yr. old was planned, my 7 yr. old was a "suprise" and the 3 year was planned (we were hoping for a boy). My kids are WONDERFUL. I have always wanted four kids and am feeling sadden because my husband and I have decided not to have anymore. The cost of college, cars, etc. was a major factor in our decision. Girls are just way more expensive to raise! Good Luck!

I have four girls ages almost 11, 9, almost 6, & almost 4. I didn't seem to have much problem handling 3. Of course my house was messier than when I had 2 but my time cold be equally well spent. My 4th child was a happy surprise & we figured how hard could it be to add 1 more, but she changed our whole lives! It's very hard to keep a house somewhat clean with all the kiddos running around & my husband & I have no extra time. It's very hard to make sure that everybody feels like they've had enough time with mom & dad. We love all our kids very much & wouldn't trade what we have for the world, but it is an absolute challenge.

Hi J., I have four wonderful girls! They are all very close in age and I love it. Honestly for me going from 2 to 3 was no big deal. The baby will adjust to your schedule with the older ones. My third daughter is so beautiful and special to us I couldn't imagine life without her.

K.

J.,

Everything everyone has said is so true. I have four children, 20, 14 1/2, 8 next month and 5 1/2. Yes, they are way spread out. I tired to have them closer but didn't work out that way. Jenni, my 5 year old was a surprise but a welcome one. I had always wanted lots of children. We manage to do what we need to do and each new child fits in where they belong, as we all find out where that is together. I have a dear friend who has 9 kids! It is a blended family, she had 4 and he had 3 and then they had 2 together. They make it work. Your family is, like others have said, the size that fills right to you. When you are done, you will know it. My friend knew after she had the last one that she was done. No doubts. I think we are done. It feels complete now. I have two girls and two boys. I am 41 years old now. It won't be long before my oldest gets married and has kids of her own. Although she will disagree with you if you say that. If you want more children, have them, it will work out money and time wise. It might be crazy at times, more times than not, but you will look back and smile as you think about it. The love of your children and for your children is pricless, as you know I am sure. God bless and best wishes on whatever you decide.

T.

I only have one right now, but I've always wanted 3. Lately I've wondered if we can afford more than two,but I would love to have lots of kids. I loved my pregnancy, and I absolutely love being a mom. My main concern is being able to afford it. Can I add that to your questions? How can you afford it and still know you can provide for college (I know I'm thinking so far ahead, but I was left hanging on that one).

Hi J..

I personally only have two children (age 3 and almost 1), but have many friends and neighbors with three kids. It is very interesting to listen to those parents. The main point from each of them has been that two is a controllable amount and three is chaotic (it's hard to give each of them attention, go anywhere without help, etc.).

We made our decision to stop at two by having our friends with three children (boy age 6, girl age 3 and girl age 18 months) over for dinner. If you know of a family with three children, spend some time with them. You may enjoy the added "life" and energy a third brings. Good luck with your decision!

Hi J.,
This may sound weird but I just p[rayed a lot about it! I kept seeing 4 kids at my dinner table whenever I prayed. It made no sense financially- no maternity coverage. It made no sense room wise (we have almost 1600 SqFt and the garage is hubby's shop!). It made no sense age wise (I was almost 40 when #4 came along, hubby was 48) There is 4 years between #1 and #2, not by our choice. Then #3 was 18 months later and #4 was 23 months after that! After #4 I had a total peace about being done- and we are :-)

So, that is my story- we have had blessing we never thought - at different times we have been given bunk beds, clothes, and toys (including a HUGE above ground pool). The money has been tight, but it has been enough- including one time when we really needed it a decent sized check from an old account that closed- I had it when I was in the Navy and totally forgot about it!

Hope that helps!

D.

J.,

I didn't read the other responses so I hope I don't repeat too much. The more we prayed about things, the more we decided to not use birth control and just let God have control of our family. He knows best and He opens and closes the womb. He has blessed us with four children. Besides, if my family had quit after 4, I wouldn't be around today!

Hope this helps!
A. S.

I am married with 2 daughters from a previous relationship. My daughters are 3 and 9 months. I always told my husband that I would never told him no if he wanted to have a baby, since he raises and loves my children like his own, I just felt like it was part of my wifely duty, even though I am in a place right now where I love just having two.

Well, my husband decided last month he wanted to start trying. I am the one who is worried about college and how busy I'll be and if I'll ever have my body back or a vacation without the kids. But, then I sit back and look at my life. My husband and I can pay all our bills and then some, we've got a little nest egg (Not much, but some.) So I stopped using the birth control patch and I told my husband that if he wants a baby, then we'll have a baby because ultimately, if it's in God's plan for me to have a baby -then who am I to say otherwise?

You know, someone on one of these posts said that we only get to borrow our children for a short time. They aren't really ours. Our lives are going to go by so fast, I want to enjoy every second of a midnight feeding with a newborn, or those baths in the sink, the camping and birthday parties and learning to ride a bike because before we know it,they'll be grown up.

YOu can ALWAYS find more reasons not to have children then you can why it's a good idea. I am a true believer that no one is every ready for children. We will never be prepared as much as we think, but as long as you love your babies and they are getting food and a warm bed.. That is what matters.

I have always wanted 4 kids but we currently,and if my husband has his way, only have 3. They are the best. I was one of two children and my husband was one of five. I always thought that it was boring with just my brother and I. We have great parents and they did tons of stuff with us but there was still only one boy to play with when no one else was around. We were three years apart, me being the oldest.
My husband was the baby of 5 and he didn't like it too much because he said they were always "poor." Basically, he didn't get everything he wanted when he wanted it...They all went to private school and he had a car when he turned 16 so believe me they were not poor! But there were hand me downs and sometimes the cheaper things had to be bought over the cooler things etc. but "things" aren't everything.
Anyway, all that to say- it's what you and your husband want. Do you want to start all over? Do you want the responsibility of another child because once you pass two you are definitely outnumbered! :) It is great though and I wouldn't trade my kids for nothing-as a matter of fact, I am trying to convince my husband of number 4. No, my kids don't have everything that every kid has but they have everything they need and no I don't dress them funny. :) We live debt free except for our home and we have a savings for our kids and their college funds. Even if it's only a little bit it's a start and there is all kinds of funding out there these days like scholarships and if you go to an in state college it is much more affordable. I don't know if this helps but I hope it did.

One last thing- you said that your husband would like to have another boy specifically, is he prepared if it's a girl? Just wondering.
Blessings!

I have 3 beautiful daughters and I would not trade them for the world. My husband and I only planned to have 2 kids but my last one was a total surprise. They are very close in age 5 yrs, 3yrs, and 2 yrs old. It was really stressful when the littlest one was born and having to spend more time changing and nursing her and trying to spend some time with the other girls. Any activity we did do with the older two it had to be quick so we could get the baby home for a nap. My oldest was really hurt during those times cause she was having fun with mom and we had to leave. That broke my heart a lot. Trying to spend one on one time with them has been a little challenging especially since my husbands job has him traveling but I do try on the weekends. We do have to have a schedule for everything. I think the 1st year of my youngest life we were late for everything no matter how much time we factored in. We were lately cause some had an accident or needed something before we left the house. Things have gotten better in ways now that my youngest is 2 yrs.
Now college funds we are still working on setting one up for our girls. I still trying to figure out which will be the best ones for them. They do get a savings bond from their grandparents for their brithday. I am also hoping they can get some scholarships too.
Spending money is hard I buy what I can on sale for them. My oldest has hit a growth spurt and she needs new shoes and summer and spring clothes and than some new clothes for school next year. I am just glad that I had 3 girls cause hand me downs have saved us a lot. The other two do get a couple of new outfits but not as much as the oldest. We do most of our grocery shopping at Costco so the membership for us is finally worth it.
It can be challenging at time but I really do love my life and that I do have my girls. I don't think I would change having more than 2 kids for anything. If you have any more questions you can PM me and we can talk on the phone if you like.

I have three kids now. 4, 19 mos and 6 mos. Our plan was to alway have 4. My husband and I being the youngest, him of 5 and I of 3, noticed that with odd numbers there was always some one left out. The last 2 being so close together have put a big question mark on number 4. My mom put it this way and although it did not help me with the question of number 4 here is what she said. You know that you are done having kids when you can picture your family complete. Would your husband be content if it were a girl? Again something my mom always said. If you wait untill you can aford them, you never will. I personally don't notice spending more on three than I did one, but I do notice that my tax return gets bigger every year. It is kind of funny to think about today as yesterday they were all driving me crazy, but I think that would be true if I just had one. I love my children. Each one of them is their own person. They each do different things and to watch them grow amazes me. My first son and my second son are NOTHING alike. Aiden my second, keeps me running and is always into something, but I love it. Keegan my oldest. He is such a good helper. Well and little Lilli at 6 mos old when the other two are driving me insane, she just looks up at me and smiles and I know it will be ok. Since we have had Lilli we rarely get anywhere on time and I am sure that will get better as they get a bit older, but I would not trade this time for anything. What I love the most about it all...
the silence of naptime
the mischief in their giggle
the twinkle in their eyes
the excitement in their smile
the lessons learned while watching
...and all of these other moments that will soon pass and be forgotten.

Hi J.,

I think you've gotten some good responses. I have two boys and had always thought I just wanted two, but now that I have them, I just don't feel like it's complete. So, I think when my youngest is one we may try again. I have also solicited the advice of families with three kids and the general consensus was that it can be crazy, but each and every one says it is totally worth it. I think every mom just knows how many children she should have. It's like a built-in number. I've prayed a lot about it, and talked to all my friends and family until they're just sick of hearing about it. It just comes down to what's in your heart. And, if you and your husband want more, the it must be the right thing to do for your family! Good luck! Let us know how it goes :)
C.