How Do You Know He/she Is the Right One...?

I think you've been reading too many romance novels. Relationships are sweat and tears, not rainbows and butterflies.

I think this is beautiful. I also think those that have responded were narrow in their thought of 'feeling safe'. Safety is an important value to have with your partner. I think 'feeling safe' is included in ALL aspects of the relationship such as: being your true self, you feel safe to disagree, have other interests and to not always like the other person and so much more. I totally got what you are saying...thanks for posting!

Are you wanting a response or just sharing? I could have a long conversation about this one. I really disagree with the second sentence -- "having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out" -- I am currently having an issue with my spouse over that very thing. Unfortunately, one ALWAYS needs to weigh what one says to others; and when others are uncomfortable with or unhappy with what we say, we need to be willing to change. This applies to spouses, as well.

So, although that might be an ideal sentiment, it doesn't really work in the real world. There's no such thing as "unconditional."

I also must disagree. I once lived with a man that I felt completely safe with, could speak my mind to and was an all around great guy. BUT he also wanted a woman that mothered him, and was a clone in his likes and dislikes. He wanted me to love all that he loved,and could not comprehend it when I couldn't get into his music or hobbies, and he didn't feel he had to give my likes a chance because he already had his own. Unfortunately love is not always enough.

I love your post and you depth of thought. I long to find such person and twin soul...rare as a pure, shiny diamond. And I also hope to be able to recognize it when I find it...that's not easy either, I think. Thanks.

oh, i don't know.
safety can be a measure, but 100% reliance on it is overrated, both in society and in love.
khairete
S.

I think that's a beautifully worded sentiment... and sounds true to me...

Thanks for sharing...

I have told my husband he is not allowed to die first. I would NEVER find someone who could be so perfect for me--he puts up with all of my weird interests and rants and hobbies, crazy pregnant moments (not always graciously, but he gets through them), and I certainly can't imagine raising my children with anyone else, or anyone else I would rather have around when the kids are finally out of the house. After almost seven years, I still miss him when we're at work, look forward to hanging out with him before bed, and like listening to him talk about his interests. Thankfully, we share many of the same. Neither of us is perfect, but we are just enough of all of the right things to be perfect for each other and I am so thankful and blessed to have him. I thank God for him every day. :)

I think a big problem today is that people find the one, and than they forget they have to work to keep it great. They give up, they act selfish and get angry when their man does not support them in this selfishness. They walk away rather than make it work. I think we know we have the right one when things can go wrong, and we are willing to put in the work and self sacrifice to make it right again. We know we have the right one when making them a priority in our lives is a joy, not a chore, and when we feel like a priority. Thanks for the post, it was nice.

I find the negative thoughts on this are strange... Now... I probably wouldn't have before I met my hubby (2nd marriage).

It's a wonderfully freeing feeling to know you'll never be judged and you'd never judge. I love that my husband and I share everything. Heart, mind, body, and soul. He is my best friend... He is my other half. I always felt like I was missing something or thought I lost it in the past somewhere... Until him.

So... I disagree that there is no such thing as unconditional love.