How Do You Get It All Done?!

It helps immensely to have a partner/husband. Mine does 1/2 of the cooking, cleaning and childcare. I do the laundry (90%), he mows the grass (90%), empties the dishwasher (99.9%) and pays the bills. We have a cleaning lady every other week.

I don't see a lot of answers talking about getting automatic bill payments set up. That's a huge time saver. And can you fold laundry while watching tv so it doubles as down time? And if you can get an iPad, you can watch tv online whil,e you cook or do dishes so that kind of doubles as down time too. I carry it around with me while I clean up too. And to be honest, I'm quick! I clean up quickly etc but may e it's partly bc everything has its place. And can you sort email while waiting in line at the grocery store and times like that? I use my blackberry all the time. Probably not good... Finally, my kids are about the same ages but I work full time. I can cook and help with homework at the same time. And it's also good for kids to play independently! My girls can get carried away playing Barbies for a long time and I love to see them using their imaginations. My mom never ever actually played with me and I adore her.

I work fulltime and have three youngsters and I can't get it all done. Sometimes projects are delayed a bit until I can catch up. This year we had some high school kids help with our outside decorating. We have a cleaning service that comes in every two weeks. My DH is great about doing laundry. I do all the cooking. It is non stop until kids go to bed.

I just received a Christmas card from friends who seem to be able to do it all. They homeschool their kids..she has a high powered paying job and is involved in multiple charitable organizations. Ok so they don't own a TV which saves time but after reading their update letter made me feel insecure......................

After a few fleeting moments of envy...I told myself Get Over It! I take one day at a time and do the best I can as a wife, mother and employee. We cant' do it all and if you realize that and know where your priorities are and make the time for the kids then you are doing better than most. Hang in there!

Make a to do list and a realistic timeline for each project and go from there. Oh yes, automate those bills! Saves time indeed.

How do i get it all done?

I don't.

I do what I can when I can.

Try to remember that your kids are only little for a little while and there will always be cleaning that needs to be done.

= )

Merry Christmas.

It must be the time frame of your life right now. I was just telling a friend how lazy I am now. When the kids were younger I never sat down. There is always something that needed to get done.
So this too shall pass. Before you know it life settles down again.
Give yourself a pat on the back for all you do.
Blessings!
D.

My first, glib answer to your post question was : "No, I don't get it all done. And there it sits."

Looking through your list, though, I was wondering which chores could reasonably be delegated to your kids? An eight year old can wipe up toothpaste, a six year old can be taught. One item crossed off. You might need to wait until they come home, but it doesn't have to be your job.

Your timer idea is right on. From what you described, you did great. I'm all about the timer at my house, and letting my son know that if I'm in the middle of dishes, etc. that I'll help him when I find a natural stopping time. "When I'm finished rinsing this sink of dishes, I will help you." Have the child take that 'waiting time' to do any prep that's needed for the help. My son likes me to put on cds for him, so I tell him that he needs to have it picked out and ready for me or he'll have to wait until the next time I'm ready.We don't do our kids any favors stopping what we're doing at their demand. If I'm sitting here, doing this, yes, but if I'm doing housework no, you have to wait.

Have the kids pick up all of their stuff and put it away before bed. Yes, you will feel like you are having to ride them on it. Perhaps it's time for a Saturday box (if it's not put away within a reasonable amount of time, then it goes away until Saturday or some other forementioned time.)

Have a designated box for any extracurricular activity supplies (think soccer/sports gear or sheet music)... this is where it lives. No hunting it down.

A paper sorter rack can help you with the bills. Designate two slots for bills, one for those due at the beginning of the month, one for those due by the 15th or later. Visit this once a week or so to get bills out on time.

Get serious with your email and unsubscribe to everything you aren't interested in /don't use. You may have to do this a few times. (Some groups seem insistent.)

Could you stagger laundry and do one load each day, then fold both loads on days that you aren't taking the kids to practices/activities? In our home, I do laundry on the carpet, sort it by location first (big pile for all kiddo's clothes, second pile for each adult, pile for bathroom, pile for kitchen) then have the kids sort out their own clothes. They should be able to stack their underpants, fold their socks, fold shirts and pants and pajamas and put them away themselves. They can also help with kitchen linens and towels. My son is 4.5 and expected to put his clothes away and to sort out his underwear and socks. If he's really in a crappy mood and isn't helpful, he may not ask me to do anything for him and has to go play and leave me alone; that said, he will *still* have clothes to put away before we can move on to any other fun stuff.

Kids can help with emptying garbage pails, vacuuming (offer your 8 year old a buck for it each weekend... you can 'supervise' from afar while you read your book, if that works for you)...

Lastly, prioritize. Sometimes, it's worth it to make a double-sized meals so that you can throw half in the freezer. I don't get it all done myself, but I try hard not to get stressed about it or beat myself up. AND I make sure to sign off my housework or other work at 7:30, no later than eight. That's time for me to chill out, or I'd go nuts.

These are just some ideas. I hope someone here has something that works for you! Good luck!

Delegate, prioritize, and plan ahead.

Assign some of those tasks to husband and kids. There is no reason he can't start a load of laundry in the morning, fold and put away when he gets in. An 8 yr old should be able to do dishes, help fold laundry and spot clean, pick up the house. The younger one can dust and help pick up. They can probably even help wipe down the bathroom with vinegar and water in a spray bottle.

Prioritize what actually HAS to be done everyday. You could probably put email and bills off until bath time, after kids go to bed or even check only every other day. If you let the dishes sit while you watch a movie with the kids, the housework police are not going to write you up.

Do as much laundry, deep cleaning, and precooking as you can on the weekend. Keep several go-to quick cook meals in the arsenal and food in the pantry. A rotisserie chicken with steam in a bag veggies on those activity nights aren't going to hurt your family one bit. Maybe even a little ceasars pizza now and then!

WHOA, you get down time? You're doing better than I am!! ;)

My kids are 8, 6, and almost 2, and like yours, my work hours are pretty flexible. It's all about self discipline. I also cut myself a lot of slack... it's not the end of the world if something doesn't get done. The only thing that absolutely gets done EVERY day are the dishes.

I've fallen into a nice routine I guess (only took me 3 years)... but I still don't have down time. Down time for me is all the kids are in bed and I've finally sat down on the couch for the first time all day! I also spurge and go to lunch once a month with my BFF... screw the work and housework, my sanity NEEDS that!!

Cut yourself some slack. We can only do what we can do. Some things will slide but that's okay. Sounds like you're doing fine to me....you're busy but you're getting it done!! :)

I automate the bill paying with my bank. Rent, phone, Internet and any payments that stay the same are on auto pay so the bank mails a check the same day every month. Anything with variable payments (payments that cost a different amount every month, like water) are payed by me writing a check.

The filing, well the file cabinet is where it is convenient for me, which is right next to the entry way and I do that as soon as I get home and the
mail is in. I can also set a payment with my bank for variable amounts, but hubby likes the paper trail...

Hmmm lots of help from the kids and eating out every now and then.

Here is what is on my plate:
Work 60 hours a week
4 kids ages 11, 7, 6, and 17 months
11 y.o. activity on Sat morn, 7 y.o. on Monday night 6 y.o. depends on what sport is going on. 17 month old just taggs along :)
I also go to school full-time in hopes of getting a regular 40 hour a week job in the high demanded medical field (they also pay the best where I am at and have great benefits. Both a must for today).
Husband also works 40+ hours a week at his job.
THANKFULLY, we have tons of family close and a nanny who helps a ton. I wish I could pay her so much more than what she is worth, but just can't right now. There is always a dish in my sink, always a toy on the floor and always a load of clothing that needs washed, BUT we are happy and that is all that matters. :)

I am by NO means perfect...and I don't always get it all done...

but what helps me is to play to my strengths, I am a morning person, therefor I try to get as much as possible done first thing in the morning, right when I wake up. Throw laundry in, unload dishwasher so it is ready to be filled during the day, as soon as kids leave for school I lay down a quick vacuum and set out their clothes for the next day, go in and wipe up the toothpaste (when do they stop making a mess with the toothpaste?).

I have also found the #1 thing that helps me out THE most is to have EVERYONE in the house help with a quick 10 minute tidy before the kids go to bed. So all toys get picked up, tables and clutter cleared, etc. and that way I am ready for the quick vacuum in the a.m.

Don't beat yourself up about it. No one is perfect. Not a single one of us! Little baby steps. This is what works for me.

Hope some of that helps?

I agree with Rachel. To add to it, I must say that your kids are old enough to help you with a lot of items on your list. Maybe try and change the schedule a bit and have family time while folding laundry, straightening, etc. You may find that is a good time to discuss everyones day. You can also have them help cook dinner, do a load of laundry, even open the mail. It's a great way to teach the every day skills.

I do online bill pay. I have a general idea of when most are due and pay them twice a month. It takes me maybe 15 minutes to open and click. As far as down time that happens maybe once a month for me if that.

I don't EVER get it all done. Ever.
I do my best. I clean, I take care of the kids. I forget bills. I try to read emails and facebook. I play with my kids, I nurse, I do it all....and I am never done.
I just try to remember that I want my kids to not just remember 'my mom ran around all the time'....I want them to get quality time with me...but I also need some time to myself. Your kids are old enough that they are in school, right? Well, that's a lot of time to get a lot done!
L.

Being a mom is only part of your life. It is a big part but part of being a wonderful mom is teaching the children that the world doesn't revolve around them.

At 6 and 8 years old my kids were responsible for small things around the house like sweeping, dusting, dust mopping, (mopping with supervision), beginning to help washing the dishes (mainly cups and plates) and they are always responsible for straightening up and making their rooms tidy and neat. I don't pick up their toys.

I schedule down time too. For instance Monday nights are Family Game night. We make certain all the "chores" are done and instead of watching tv or reading for leisure we play games. My kids are older but we have so much fun and so much talk goes on when we play games it helps us to connect as a family.

I get my me time on Saturday mornings when hubby takes the boys with him and I'm alone in the house for almost 4 straight hours. Sometimes I just sleep in or watch a movie or do some detailed cleaning but that time is my time to be alone with my thoughts.

I pay most of the bills online whenever possible. I don't worry about the things that fall through the cracks. I'm trying to enjoy the life I have rather than look back and have things be a blurr.

Are you harnessing the kid power? If you do FlyLady are you also having them do the daily kid challenges? They're old enough they need to start learning how to do things so they don't end up helpless like my "How do I make grilled cheese?" ex-hubby

And remember that having a nice meal every night doesn't neccesarily mean preparing it start to finish every night. Anytime you make something time consuming like lasagna double it (at least) and freeze one (or more!) Cook and clean once but eat at least twice....

Instead of having them do their homework while you fix dinner, maybe have them set the table, help with dinner or do the daily kid challenge. Then while they're doing their homework after dinner you can set down with them and do YOUR "homework" (mail, bills, whatever) at the same time...

ALSO, try doing a VERY detailed "what I DID today list" for at least a week. It'll A) amaze you how much you really DO get done in a day, B) enable you to analyze the differences between what you plan and what actually happens so you can either make more realistic plans OR come up with strategies to avoid getting sidetracked

You've gotten a lot of good tips, so I won't be redundant. In addition or as an alternative to the automated bill pay, you can create a bill check list. the rows would read rent/ mortgage, car payment, cable, phone, credit card, etc. whatever bills you get regularly. the columns are for the next 6 months. Keep this spreadsheet in hard copy near wherever you pay your bills. Everytime a bill comes in, put in the amount due and the due date in the box. When its paid, cross it off as paid. We implemented this b/c our gas company failed to bill us, or maybe it got lost in the mail, and without the bill in hand, we missed a payment.

Never again will we miss making a payment because we weren't billed. Now we can see if something's gone wrong.

It's doable, you just need to do it. If something doesn't get done, it doesn't get done. A normal day for me starts with me leaving the house at 615 to be to work by 630. I work until 1135 and then go get my 4 year old from daycare (where his morning sitter drops him off) and take him home to get on the bus to go to afternoon pre-k. I grab something to eat from home most days and head back to work until 330 when I leave to go meet the older two at the bus.

Monday's, my daughter gets a ride to dance with other people in our neighborhood, but sometimes I need to go. Thursday's I take all of the girls. My youngest doesn't get home until 510ish, so I either leave work at 230 on those days to get him or my husband leaves work early. Husband works 2 hours away, so he isn't/can't be home to help during the week.

I also work full-time on my MBA classes when I'm at home. We're lucky to eat a homecooked meal during the week.

My home is clean, but not spotless.

Life was much more simple when I worked from home and could so some quick cleanup/laundry during the day.

I always tell myself (even with my schedule) that it could be worse. Be grateful that you do work from home and have some time to do the quick things. And the things that don't get done, don't stress.

I agree with most who have responded - cut yourself some slack. But I hear you. When my son turned 1 I went back to school and good an insane 18 hours my first semester, plus a minimester over the holidays, which was a whole semester in 3 weeks. Here's what helped me manage my household during that time...and even now...

Get up at least an hour earlier than everyone else. I get up btwn 4-5am. Everyone else gets up at 6:30.

Use paper goods.

Your kids are old enough to wash out the sink/clean up spilled toothpaste.

Keep cleaning products in each bathroom. That way, you won't dread having to hunt down supplies or lug a basket of cleaning products around.

Your kids are old enough to put things away when they are done. Playtime is one thing...making a mess is another. Teach them the difference by telling them to put something away before pulling out something else. They are expected to do this in school so they are fully capable of doing this at home.

Laundry - have them help you. Have them gather empty hangers. Buy a laundry sorter and tell them where whites/darks (or however you sort your loads) go. Example, on white days, have one child bring that basket/bag to laundry room. On dark days, have the other child do it, etc. Have them help you fold and put away.

Invest in a crockpot. I have a great recipe book called "6 ingredients or less" crockpot recipes. I use my crockpot at least 2-3 a week.

Your kids are old enough to help clean up after dinner. Put one to work clearing and wiping the table, and the other cleaning the floor or helping you pack leftovers up. They can help you put away dishes or load the washer up if you teach them. My kid is positioned at the end of our washer and as I rinse something off, he knows where in the washer to put it.

They are old enough to take baths/showers by themselves. I lay out my kid's pjs on the toilet for when he is done. He also knows to put his clothes in the laundry and brush his teeth after his night bath.

Do one housework item a day other than laundry. That way you won't be lugging around a bunch of cleaning supplies. I grab my swiffer duster and dust the upstairs one day (this doesn't even take me 30 mins), dust downstairs the next day, sweep and vaccum the next day and bathrooms the next day. So my weekends are basically free from housework if I keep that schedule.

gl and hth

Excellent question, and I wonder the same. exact. things.

flylady.net is my friend. i took her basic morning and evening routines, the weekly schedule of "stuff" that needs to get done (so i don't forget some things, for ideas and a "template"), she divides the weekly chores into zones, and i made my own to fit our family's needs and schedule. she is SO right about the evening routine being more important than the daily one to keep you on track for the next day. once i made my own routine, i printed it off and put it in a 3 ring binder. (i also have a monthly/daily calendar, and dividers for misc/notes, daily routines, basic weekly plan, zones 1-5, menu and shopping list, helpful #s, budget and financial tracker, and personal notes). it's my "household manual".
i think this is the perfect time to start thinking of new ways to handle the madness, since the year is almost up and you'll be starting a new calendar or planner, reassessing your priorities and what worked well and what needs to be tweaked (or at least, that's stuff we do at the end of every year, LOL).

No one gets it all done every day. BUT in looking at your list, it doesn't appear that there's anything on there that takes any real amount of time other than perhaps cooking dinner and maybe sorting e-mail (with all the junk mail that comes in.) I could literally have your first 8 items done in 2 hours with time to spare! I think you are letting your kids side track you too much. For example, why does your 6 year old need "help" with legos? If you set aside time that you tell the children you have to play by yourselves or with each other from X time to X time and you spend that time concentrating on your work, you will get alot more done than if you spent three times as long but interacted with your kids while doing it. Also, the quality of work would probably increase since you're not side tracked. We all have a lot to do; I have 2-1/2 hours with my granddaughter each evening from the time we get home until bed time. During that short time frame, we have to: 1) do homework; 2) fix dinner (she cooks with me most of the time); 3) eat family dinner; 4) do dishes; 5) help with homework; 6) bathe/shower; 7) before bed snack; 8) reading; 9) bed on time. This right here accounts for half of what you listed and we get it all done in 2-1/2 hours EVERY night.

I posted something similar a year or so ago. I have a 2 and 5 year old and a 34 year old 'child'!!!! I have tried to do it all and all it got me was completely anxious and seeing a therapist - seriously. I leave the house at 6:30 and get home with the kids at 5:30 - I make them dinner and do reading, playing, dance party, etc. - something to have fun with them then it's bath time, some cuddle time and bedtime. My husband gets home at 7 and when he gets home he may sit down with the kids for a little bit but then I go into the kitchen and clean up the dinner mess. SOMETIMES I eat too!!!!!

I hate spending the weekend cleaning and de-cluttering but honestly once the kids are in bed I am too exhausted to do much but throw a load of laundry in the washing machine - then I take a hot bath and may read a few pages (usually fall asleep after a few pages).

On the weekends I'll ask my husband to keep the kids occupied while I clean - because really, he won't clean.......much. He is a good one to get clutter off of the dinning room table or kitchen counters (however I asked that he do that over the weekend and it's still a mess).

My house is never spotless or decluttered - drives me nuts but I can't do it all........