How Do You Correct/teach Your Child?

Updated on July 26, 2011
C.O. asks from Reston, VA
10 answers

How do you correct your child and all the wild things they learn in school and from other people - like the media? There have been several good questions lately on the debt ceiling and a very good response...most everyone has been mature and level-headed...so it is proven that a question CAN be handled with maturity...

For example - we talk about politics, religion, etc. in our home...this is NOT a rant..this is NOT a one-sided slam...I would like to know how you teach your children....do you lead by example or do you go into depth?

We have tried to teach our children about the differences in politics.. for example:
That our country, the United States of America, is a REPUBLIC NOT a Democracy.
That is it NOT the governments responsibility to care and provide for its citizens...it is the person's responsibility to seek or pursue the happiness and liberty given to us in our Constitution.

We have taught our children that while there is a HUGE divide in our nation - we all want the same thing - just different paths to get there...for example...it is our opinion, that a liberal wants to give it all away, have a HUGE government that supports the citizens and that EVERYONE is entitled to a piece of the action...but a Libertarian is someone who wants a small government, to help people when they choose - not when the Government tells them to and that each person is responsible for themselves and their family - NOT the government.

We have explained to our children about the difference between the debt ceiling and the deficit....how our government was set up to have a system of checks and balances...that our elected officials (congress, president, etc.) are OUR employees...that the government is NOT a business and does not "make" money as one would at a job...

So with all the world in chaos - how do you teach your children your beliefs?

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J.C.

answers from Richmond on

Your definition of a liberal is not accurate. Nor completely is the libertarian description. If you are talking to your children about politics as you believe and understand it then you are doing what you should do. Talk. Let them ask questions and explain it as best you can, but I would also suggest that you research the questions together and you may find the answers or understandings together. And sometimes it may not be what you thought.

6 moms found this helpful
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T.K.

answers from Washington DC on

Your beliefs and factual information about politics are two different things. I think the best thing is to teach critical thinking skills and make sure to point out when a "fact" or argument doesn't stack up against scrutiny. Many things in the media are skewed these days because controversy drives views. I've read many articles where the "thesis" is not at all supported by facts. You claim liberals want huge government and that they want to give it all away, but that is a total fallacy. If you teach them to examine what they see and read closely it will help them sift through all media messages, personal agendas, and help them develop their own views.

5 moms found this helpful
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A.C.

answers from Washington DC on

I don't go into depth about politics with my kids who are a little to young to care about it. But I do let them see and hear what I watch and listen to. If the president or a major figure is speaking, I make the oldest watch for a while.

But as an aside, if you want your children to know about civics and be able to make their minds up about things, you may want to change your rhetoric to a more neutral tone regardless of your opinions which are valid. I would not describe to my children that republicans are bull headed, only for the rich hypocritical party. I would explain that they believe in a limited government, with a low tax base, which could create a business friendly environment, and tend to be socially conservative on certain issues. And liberals believe in a more hands on governmental approach that supports financially a larger segment of the population who have difficulty and believe in stronger regulations to protect people/environment, etc.

This is a great question actually for me to codify what each party in america stands for and why each point is valid. But, I was raised to believe that though your family may believe in something, you can make choices based off of info, not opinion. Saying that liberals want to give it all away, is a very loaded statement similar to saying that hispanics let their children run W. with no supervision(an obvious generalization) or Blacks don't care about their kids education. You can give information and let them know what you believe, but if you want to have children who listen to others as it looks like you're willing to listen to us in this forum, then leave the loaded statements for your conversation with adults. Just my two cents.

4 moms found this helpful
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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Good Q.
Gonna keep this short.
I doubt if anyone can really answer their child's political questions in a bias-free manner. Adults are already biased and believe that their beliefs are *correct*.
So......I try to answer without *defining* political parties and skewing what "e" think vs. what "they" think, etc, as I believe this is totally wrong.
Daily, I try to teach examples of compassion, and empathy, because without those--we have nothing.
O. cannot live in a bubble aimed at "keeping mine" and giving skewed perspectives on what others supposedly believe. If we use that approach, can it be any real mystery where prejudice, division and exclusion breed?

So yes, I go into depth (my 8 year old easily handles these concepts when they are explained in a NON biased way. For example, I do not say that Republicans support the use of handguns becasue they are very afraid of allowing anyone else to have something that they have not earned". That would be a broad generalizations don't you agree? Much like "a liberal wants to give it all away, have a HUGE government that supports the citizens and that EVERYONE is entitled to a piece of the action" , right? Surely No O. can have their beliefs summed up in those slanted, short-sighted, truthless generalizations, correct? In fact if you read both examples again, or even the question, it's so easy to see why there is such a climate of "we vs. they" in this country. I think parents need to stop the cycle, as it is just...that...ridiculous!

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J.S.

answers from Washington DC on

When it comes to politics and things like that I don't teach my children MY beliefs. I explain that everyone is trying to do what they think is best for everyone. That you need to listen to all the different sides and then decide for yourself who you agree with. When it comes to politics I hate blind loyalty to one side or the other. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. I want my girls to think and make their own decisions.
I teach my child that everyone in society needs to do something that helps others. I tell them that every job you can think of helps other people in some way. I also teach them that everyone goes through difficult times and when we are doing OK it is our job to help others through giving to charity, donating items, etc. because someday we may be the ones that need help. I teach empathy for those in need - empathy without judgement.

2 moms found this helpful
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K.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

Good question....

We teach our children that EVERYONE deserves respect...
That we help our fellow man - however, not because the Government tells us to, but because we CHOOSE to.

We teach our children that the world is a HUGE place and not everyone thinks the same way...and while we might not always agree - as long as they are respectful - you need to listen to their point of view as you might learn something new...

We also teach there are many different religions - but in the end - they all worship the same God...at least I'd like to think we do!! :)

We also teach the government is supposed to protect the citizens and NOT provide for them.

1 mom found this helpful

J.G.

answers from San Antonio on

I am so glad my son is just 3 and can't really understand all of that political stuff right now. So right now we basically just teach by telling him to respect people, be courteous, etc. We model the same. We follow thru with the fact that he must not just tell me "Yep" but must say "yes ma'am." I have always told him he can answer "yes ma'am or no ma'am." He's said please and thank you since he was able to do his sign language. As for all the rest of beliefs, those will come in time. I plan to home-school, so likely we will choose curriculum which will share our beliefs.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Any question is answered in our home. It is actually a really good policy if you wish to never become dogmatic. Children look at things so differently than adults that if you listen and considered their questions you can learn a lot. If you seriously find the correct answer you can learn a lot about yourself.

I think my kids have adopted our belief system because they were open to question it. I don't share a lot of beliefs with my parents because every question was answered with I told you so. :(

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D.K.

answers from Sioux City on

We start with metaphysics, there are absolutes. We show them that you can't have two truths that are direct opposites and truth is not changing. If that were the case then there would be no such thing as truth. There are countless lies in the world and there is no way I could tell them of all the ways lies may be presented to them. I can teach them truth and from that they have a way to identify the lies that may be out there. Often we look at natural law to better understand what is desired for man through God's law. One of our first lessons is that there is only one God and he will never contradict himself.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Well to make a short answer of this: from 2 years old we have taught our kids about social situations, people, differences in people, how to analyze media and the news and tv shows etc., about culture and the world etc.
So they are now 8 and 4 years old... they CAN, analyze these aspects of life.

It is about 'teaching' a child. About perspectives. About cultural differences. About Ethnic differences. About language differences etc.
In my State, there are TONS of different skin colors/races/ethnicities/cultures/religions/beliefs. And, everyone adopts other cultural traditions too.
It is about learning about differences and how everyone is different... BUT... knowing the foundations of your FAMILY, too. NOT in a prejudiced manner.
I like my kids, to learn about people and beliefs, no matter where they are from. And how to analyze... people and situations and media.
At their ages, they are good at it.
And, we let them ask questions.
And knowing, that they are not identical to us. As they grow up... they will have their own ideas too. Even now.
But you guide them.
NOT in a prejudiced way, nor talking 'stink' about others, or other cultures or other beliefs.

For complex financial issues, well no, not in a complex way. But in basic ways, we teach them that too.

There is the National 'ethos' of a country, then the cultural/Ethnic ethos, and family ethos. ALL of these... construct and impact, a child and adult.
It is not all the same.

One of the worst things to teach a kid: is to be, Ethnocentric. Or egocentric.
I am schooled in Anthropology. And I teach my kids, in this manner as well.

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