How Do I Handle a Pediatric Dentist with Bad Etiquette

Why did you let him treat your son this way?? This sounds like a horrible dentist. I would complain in every humanly way possible at this point. Call, write, call him out personally... everything. do some formal complaints too.

Last year there were a few Dateline and 20/20 shows about these dentists that accept medicaid and such. It was horrifying! They had an undercover dental assistant armed with a hidden camera and what they showed at these places is that these children are treated terribly and are often restrained and are put through dental procedures without any pain relief. One of my good friends is a pediatric dentist and she said that a papoose is almost never used and if it is it is in extreme cases, such as with a special needs child that has to have the work done as an emergency. Sounds like you ended up at one of these terrible dentist offices. I would report him and in the future you may want to look for free dental care. It can be found. Here in the Minneapolis, MN area we have a few dentists that do free dental care to anyone 2-3 days a week....first come first serve. Good luck in your search and I hope you don't take your child back to a place like that.
Google Small Smiles 20/20 .... I think you will find some info there.

This is horrifying and abusive. Find a different dentist and report this one to the state dental board. He should lose his license.

It would be better to have no dental care at all than a dentist like this. If you're interested in the DIY options (or end up with no alternative), check out these books:
"Kiss Your Dentist Goodbye: A Do-It-Yourself Mouth Care System for Healthy, Clean Gums and Teeth"
"Cure Tooth Decay: remineralize cavities and repair your teeth naturally with good food."
Also look into "oil pulling" as a form of DIY dental care.
You can find a free electronic copy of the book "Where there is no Dentist" online at http://www.hesperian.org/publications_download.php#dentist

There are good, kind dentists out there. Call around and find one. Tell them your story. Even if you can't find one who will accept Medicaid, ask if they'd be willing to do a free introductory exam to help your child develop some positive associations with dentists. Your son needs some positive experiences with dentists ASAP, or he'll be saddled with a lifetime phobia.

I am so sorry you had to go through this.

There is a governing board for dentists in every state. Contact you state representive and ask how to contact them.
About your work history:
You don't say what kind of work you have done or if you have any education. So I'm offering only general information. Many retail stores will hire you without a lot of or no experience. The pay is low and you end up working a lot of weekends and holidays but it's a job. Restaurants will also hire an inexperinced waitress, if you work in a supper club type of place the tips are better. My daughter works for an IHOP and makes decent money.
Contact you local Job Service and ask if they have programs for women rerturning to work after several years of being a SAHM. Also contact local universities and technical schools they also have programs for women returning to work. You may also find something through employment agencies, it's often temp work but if you are reliable and show them that you can do it, they will try to keep you busy. If a temp to perm job comes in they may send you to interview.
Good luck to you--you can do this.

Added:
Are you getting Social Security Survivor Benefits for your son? You should be getting them.

The way you deal with that kind is ---You don't . You leave the office. Call HIS supervisor and tell them what a rotten Dr he is. Find some free/low cost clinic in your area and get your child treated there. I am so sorry he treated you and your child that way! Don't ever go back there. Even if you have to wait for an appt with a new dentist--do it, it will be so much better!

M

Oh my goodness, why in the world did you let the dentist start drilling w/o any novacaine...not once but twice?!!! I suspect a letter isn't going to do a darn thing but waste your time. Sorry but he's basically a gov't employee and gov't employee's usally are less than adequate (not always but so often).

I would consider taking him to a dental school. cleanings there are so cheap, they just last a bit longer, since it's a student working on the teeth.

I understand that you feel your hands are tied due to your circumstances, but I have to say as a parent there would have been no follow up visit to That Dentist if it were my kid...also I doubt I could have stood by and witnessed the same thing happen to my child without opening my mouth...but then, I am not what one would call "shy" especially when it comes to my kids well being.
I am so sorry your son has suffered, this man sounds awful and unprofessional to say the least. Honestly I do not know who you would call or write, but I would look into to it to say the least. Any GOOD pediatric dentist will assure you, that THIS experience was NOT the norm.

He wasn't treating you that way because you were a Medicaid patient. Medicaid is actually a great payor source for dentists so please forget about that part. It's always a common misconception that you will get treated as a lessor patient because you are a Medicaid patient. Medicaid doesn't pay a fortune but they pay quickly which doctor's offices like. Some docs just arent' good docs, some docs aren't very patient or have a great bedside manner and some are brusk.

But many peds dentists go in with a no nonsense attitude because they want the kids to responds and not fool around. Some adopt that attitude because they want the kids to know right off the bat that there is no fooling around or drama in the chair. Kids that are yelling, screaming and such doesn't make the office run smoothly or make the kids out in the waiting room feel comfortable. Sounds like he was pretty old school. And unless you are a dentist or have dental training you have no way of knowing how big the drilled area needed to be so try to put that aside and take it out of the emotional equation.

But as a mom, you are your child's advocate. If you have a concern (like no novacaine) then you needed to speak up and ask questions right then. Nothing changes when you don't speak up. It's not just you, trust me! We all do it at times.

But know that are are situations where using the needle and novacaine would have been worse for your son and more trauma and drama than drilling into a small surface cavity. I had to have some drilling done early in my first pregnancy and I chose to do it without novaccaine and there wasn't any pain.

I don't think this was a medicaid issue. there were a few things you said that made me really question your son's behavior. I don't know his age, but throwing fits and not even letting the denist look in his mouth doesn't really sound like it's the dentists fault, what happened after might be his fault, but then again you aren't a trained dentist so how do you know the size of the hole, or wether they used laser dentistry that doesn't need novicane. Find a new dentist, and do some work with your kid reading books about how to behave in the dentists office and role play at home, while you brush his teeth.

I am so sorry! yes, I would have said something and I sure wouldn't go back. I hope you can find another dentist.

First of all I'm shocked that you would stay and allow that to happen! I have walked out of a dentist office before because they wouldn't treat my daughter well.
I went to an expensive dentist in Boca and they tried to push my daughter down into the seat when she started to sit up freaking because it was her first time. I flipped on them and told them not to hold her down as that will cause trauma and she'll never want to go to a dentist again. I wasn't going to pay $200 for my daughter to be traumatized! I calmed my daughter down and when she was ready again I said it was ok to start.

I wasn't able to continue that dentist financially and went to a lovely medicaid dentist in Boynton Beach right near the festival/carnival. She and all her staff allowed me in the room, were patient and did the job correctly.

Like someone else said YOU are the only one there to protect your child, that's what you need to do. I think it's mental that they did this without novocaine and you should report them.
I know sometimes we get into situations and freak ourselves and don't know how to react. But time has passed, I would complain, talk to your son and find a better dentist.
One other point is that you don't mention how your son behaved. You said they said "if your son won't let us examine him" means he was doing something? Either way, no reason to skip novocaine or that treatment.

When my daughter was almost two I brought her to the dentist with me to observe my teeth being cleaned and what to expect. She has always had positive experiences (except for when she had her wisdom teeth out in Feb.). I had a crappy, old school dentist when I was 8ish that when he went to drill after novacaine I told him I could still feel it. He told be to shut up and pushed my hands down. I obviously got over it after I went to a new dentist. I now call on (I'm in sales) physicians who take Medicaide/Medical and most will stop accepting it sooner or later. They are reimbursed SO incredibly low it's a joke and most are disgruntled, no excuse though. Get a great job that you can afford good insurance and move on to quality healthcare.

Why are you against the dentists in the "worst parts of town"?. Their location doesn't mean anything. Would you rather have the rude dentist in Beverly Hills or the the caring dentist in the ghetto? I know where I'd go. You never know until you try, you might be surprised. All dentists have the same training, schooling, etc., so I'm not sure why you'd think they were less than because of what area they were in. It doesn't sound like it could get much worse than what your son's already experienced, anyway.

Get another dentist as suggested by others, and report this guy to the state dental board. Also ask your pediatrician for referrals to appropriate dentsts, pediatric or otherwise. You need someone experienced with kids, not necessarily a "pediatric" dentist. I'd question this guy's tactics, not to mention his attitude. I don't think you get anywhere by confronting someone so rude, but you can certainly remove your child from the chair - which is what this guy wants you to do anyway. You can also complain somewhat audibly to the receptionist in the waiting room. Ask if there is anyone else in the practice or the building who actually has a bedside manner and has experience working with children!

Medicaide, Welfare, whatever. That is no way to treat a human being. Just reading your letter makes me ashamed of that poor excuse of a proffessional. This piece of garbage should be reported. The damage he has caused on your child will take a long time to correct, let alone any other patients in his practice.
When you call the dentist office, do some questioning with the receptionist. It will give you a "feel" of how it is run. Ask if they have children patients (it doesnt have to be a pediatric dentist) Maybe a small office will give a more satisfying service. Good luck

How horrifying! I am so sorry you and your son had to go through this. There is just no excuse for that type of behavior.

I doubt Medicaid had anything to do with it, as most of the time the dentist does not know which patients have which types of insurance. There is usually someone in the office that deals with insurance. The dentists usually just see patients.

My son goes to the same dentist that my husband and I go to. I didn't really look in to Pediatric Dentists. You might consider just looking for a reputable dentist. Pediatric dentistry is still relatively new (I think), so many dentists will be used to working on kids. For now, just try to find someone you feel comfortable with.

I liked Jed S's idea of calling a dental school. They often treat patients for little to no cost and have great supervision, as the students are being evaluated.

Good luck! Hope you find someone soon :-)

Does he belong in a group practice? If possible, you could always switch dentists that way. If not, I would look at any dentist with medicaid. They don't have to be a pediatric dentist either. I would also go online and see if you can find dentist in your area that accept Medicaid, and also have good reviews by others. That's what I do. If they are well reviewed, I would take your son to them and explain your situation . How fearful you and your son are because of his last visit with a dentist.

I had a dentist treat me this way when I was a teenager. I kept telling him my tooth wasn't numb and screaming. He put his knee on my chest and drilled anyway.

Your son will be traumatized over this. I would report him to any medical board I could think of and post it every where I could that he is not a good dentist.

By the way, this is almost always how a Family dentist treats smaller children. Call your provider and ask them to send you a list of every pediatric dentist that takes the medical card.

We found one that we love by doing just that. The list only had a few for our entire state, I called each of them and the person answering his phone was informed, knew what made a dentist a pediatric dentist, etc...they have knew office staff now and they are about half as good as the others were.

We travel 125 miles, one way, to see the pediatric dentist in OKC twice each year. Find a good one and stick with them. They should put your child to sleep in an out patient surgery center, he'll go to sleep (no trauma), all the work will be done in a few minutes, and he'll wake up ready to go play and eat at McDonalds.