We both attend this mommy night out wine movie and book club group.She believes the lies she tells too. I have try to call her out on it , but she refuses to talk to me.She thinks she met celebrities before when it's obvious she made it up.She gets everything messed up when you try and have a conversation with her.Everyone thinks it's cute and tells ME to stop picking on her.She wrote this godawful book she had self published, and now we all have to read it for ladies book club.
Perhaps sit out that month rather than make a fuss? I think that would be better than create drama about it - which is what being confrontational would achieve.
This has to do with her - not you. If you don't like something someone is doing, you ignore it. I would focus on those in the club you prefer. The next book will no doubt interest you more.
Correcting what she does or doesn't do is not your job! Ignore her.
B.
you don't. you let others find out on their own.
STOP. Really just stop.
You really have this sense of superiority over others. You remind me of the "Twiight Zone" episode called ' 4o'clock' where his guy believes he is superior to all and calls the police and the FBI on people who he feels has done something WRONG and at 4 o'clock on a set day all those that are NOT morally acceptable will shrink to 4" tall. Well - the day and time comes and HE is the one that shrinks - not others.
YOU may feel the book was horrible - however it was published. Have YOU published a book? If no, who are you to judge?
SO WHAT if she tells people she's met celebrities!? WHAT business is it of yours to call her on it?? My God. Really. STOP.
I've met celebrities - Former President Clinton - his wife (urgh), Colin Powell, Madeline Albiright and others - I've met Casper Van Dein, Dina Meyer, and many others - who are you to call me on those??
Stop being the police of others. You really need to police yourself. You might soon find yourself without friends. Why? Because your "standards" are soo high that they don't feel like trying to reach up to them. Do you hold yourself to the same standards? Or do you already feel you are perfect?
Why do you feel the need to confront her? What would that accomplish? Wouldn't it be better to just smile and nod and let it go?
If everyone is telling you to stop picking on her, maybe you are creating more of a problem than she is.
To answer your question, you can't confront her without looking mean. Now my question for you is, do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy? Because this is one of those times when you can't be both.
Why do you need to confront her and/or challenge her reality?
She has delusions of grandeur.
So what?
Why should that bother you?
She's stopped talking to you.
That sounds like a perfect resolution to your problem.
If she's not talking to you - she's certainly not telling YOU any lies anymore.
As for her book - consider it to be fiction.
If anyone asks you about it you can say you've read it and it's not your cup of tea.
I have friends who love personal interest stories and I can't stand those kind of books.
I like sci/fi and fantasy - and it's ok if my friends don't like the same kind of books.
You seem to want to confront/call out a lot of people for various reasons.
It's not a really good way to interact with others.
At some point you have to wonder who exactly is having the problem.
There are certainly times when confrontation is necessary but you need to take a look at your own boundaries and decide if they need some renegotiation.
If they protect you - be sure about what they are protecting you from.
If they surround you and start making you feel locked in - well then you are in a cage of your own making.
What is the point of confronting her? What are you trying to accomplish? Are you trying to make her feel bad in front of other people? Are you trying to make yourself look good?
you seem like kind of a mean person.
If you leave the club, the people who are left will have the opportunity to decide ON THEIR OWN if she is really cute or not. Right now, you are making everyone uncomfortable. They just want everyone to get along.
This is a club FOR getting along. Not a club for you to beat people up. Either shut up about the woman and her book, or leave the club. Do it before they throw you out.
Why is it that you feel the need to correct her? It’s not your job to be the police of the group. No need to be the busy body unless you are trying to deflect the attention to yourself.
You do not “have” to read a specific book. All you “have” to do is die and pay taxes.
Why don’t you take a break from the group if this is stressing you out so much. By then, things will fall into place as how everyone feels about members of the group.
