Hormone Replacement Theorapy

Who are these other children and why are they over every night? Is he helping and being a co-parent? It sounds like you guys need a talk about what responsibility each has and divide up the work. One of my friends who found she was arguing with her husband all the time about housework and didn't really want to do that much arguing put up a list of the things to do, they now put their initials and date when each does a chore, when it becomes apparent that there are a lot more initials of one rather than the other, then the other knows to get off their tush and do some chores.
Having a sleep over once in a while is fine but it doesn't have to be that often.

I'm sorry, I don't know if I understand what you're saying. Are you (or your husband) saying that hormone replacement therapy is the reason you can't handle a full work schedule on top of all the housework, cooking, and children in your life?

I would say that your husband needs to pitch in and help you. It's his house too.

Tell your husband that if he wants to have a bunch of kids over every night to watch them while you go to a movie. While he's watching the kids he sould be able to get a couple loads of laundry done.

Hi C.,

I just quickly want to say that I would recomment getting off the hormone replacement therapy. You are so young! I don't know why you need to be on it, but I don't understand why any doctor would put you on that this young. And I wouldn't advocate it for anyone at any age! I have heard progesterone cream can take the place of the HRT without the risk and the negative side effects (like the fatigue). If you'd like to talk with a friend of mine that knows more about it and could send you an informational CD about a good natural progesterone cream (and why messing with estrogen is BAD), let me know! I'll get you her name and e-mail.

Blessings,
K.

Hi C., You know what MEN have no idea what we go through. You may have some emotional and physical changes with the hormone therapy plus dealing with work the house and your child. Its 2008 and women still don't get the respect they deserve for all of their hard work. If we could get men to walk in our shoes and do all we do in one day while having their period that would be a dream come true also a miracle. I don't know what you can do but maybe pitch a tent in front of the house and go on strike. Just kidding. Take care A. Good Luck

I'm sorry, I don't fully understand either. Who are the extra kids you would have over every night? It sounds like what your husband is saying to you is cruel, though, telling you that you could not handle having any more of your own children. "Get with the program" is something he should tell an employee, not his wife. It sounds like he lacks empathy for you. If you work too, then there is no reason why you should be handling all the cleaning, cooking, laundry, and household work. Thats' just not right, hormone therapy has nothing to do with that. Tell him to help out, make a list of work to be done and how you two can share it, or tell him you will be hiring someone to do it.

C.,

Promote a product called Mr. CC Maca Elite. We had a lady in October who has been trying to get pregnant for 10 years one month on the product and her hormones and stress levels went down and now she is expecting a baby after just a month after being on the product. The main ingredients are Maca Root a know hormone balance Root from Peru and Sensoril. Feel free to look these up on the internet. The website is www.welcometoadvantage.com/changeyourlife

Good luck and Many Blessings,

Maca Marge

Hi C.,
I'll tell you what you should do. Next time there are kids over to play, tell your husband that you are going out. Go shopping or to a movie & let him deal with the chaos. The key is that you actually have to go out of the house. When you tell him you're leaving, have your coat on & the keys in your hand & go. He'll change his tune the first time you do it. And if he lies & tells you that it was great, then say "Oh good, than the next time they want to come over it will give me a chance to get my nails done". You also need to tell him that his comments are hurtful. Tell him that Mothers & Fathers are always more tolerant of their own children. My husband can't stand it when we have other children at our house for a play date. But when he is with our kids he is a wonderful Daddy & loves his children more than life itself.

Taking care of your own children and having other kids over are two entirely different things.

I have two of my own and one on the way and I'm 40. I can handle my own well because they are well disciplined children that will listen to me. Sometimes at the end of the day having someone elses children over....especially those that run their households is not easy. I can't discipline those children and that makes it more stressful because I can't just calmly tell them to behave and have them listen.

If he wants extra children over then tell him it is his responsibility to care for them....and remind him that how you respond to and react to your own kids is not the same as someone elses kids. And that is just the fact of life and kids.

Shame on him! Leave him there with 10 seven years olds for an overnight and see how he deals with it. I have been on HRT for 12 years and know exactly what you go through on a daily basis. He needs a reality check. I truly would leave the house for the night and leave him with all the kids. He has to experience it before he can understand it. Print somethings off the web and make him read about HRT. He should be more understanding!! especially since he can't relate. MEN MAKE ME SO MAD when they say things like that!!! UGH
Barb R

Sounds to me like your husband needs to get with the program! What does he do after work? Go golfing, sit on his duff in front of the tube? He has to pick up half the responsibility of housework! You're exhausted. If he wants any one-on-one time with you, he needs to step up and do his part of the household so you have some relief time for yourself..to shop, take a hot bath, read, etc. Men can be thoughtless sometimes but if he's a good man, he'll come around for you. If he doesn't, who needs that?

One child is ok for a while. In some way I do agree with husband. She needs to have that contact with other kids.

If only two nights a week...make it a date and plan what night, so you can be prepared for it in your mind when you come home. Just a thought. I helped a friend of mind once by suggesting this to her and it worked out for all.

Good luck

Did you talk to your doctor about some "happy pills"? Zoloft and Effexor both worked wonders for me to get the chemicals in my brain back in order. My husband thought we couldn't have a second child either because I was too emotional. I just kept telling him I didn't feel like myself--- a few weeks on meds and I was back to normal. Also, is there a reason dear hubby doesn't help out around the house more? Having your husband pitch in and lowering your house cleanliness standards will help too.

If you and your husband are both working full time and YOU are doing the housework, cooking, etc., then HE needs to step in. I would put it to him this way: either help, or you're hiring help because it's absolutely not fair.
I saw on a talk show once (on the subject of lazy husbands), that it helps if you keep a chart of what each spouse is responsible for so that there are no arguments.
I don't understand your connection between hormone therapy and your question, but if you're feeling unbalanced due to hormones, then I would see your doctor/seek other opinions and demand that it get regulated. You shouldn't feel that way at age 31. My doctor, who is a family MD who also has a degree in holistic medicine, says that bioidentical hormones are the way to go, not synthetic. Check into all of your options; if you aren't feeling well, then your doc isn't doing his/her job. It's your body, so seek out a better option. I hope your hubby shows more respect and that you feel better soon.

Hi there,
I am sorry, you are not going to like what I have to say. He is the one who should get with the program! You are the one doing all the work...no wonder you do not want any more children to clean up after. He needs to step it up! If you work 40 hours...why are you the only one cleaning, cooking and doing laundry plus!!! We are not in the 50's....have you talked to him about helping? My husband gets up extra early so he can thaw out the breast milk in freezer, make our lunches, get dressed for work, feed cat and make my coffee. I get up later and feed baby, pump, get dressed for work, change baby, take to daycare etc. My husband does bathrooms, puts dishes and clothes away. He does floors, maintenance on house, pays bills etc. One person cannot do everything. I would not want anymore work if I was you. If you have another one...who is going to attend to all the extra work?

Sorry for my strong 2 cents...but really think you have a right to complain about kids coming over.

Best to you!
A.

Iam a mother of two young adults,and soon to be new grandmother. Have you tried to ask your husband to help with the housework and that you are just plain tired from working and then taking care his daughter too, Tell him both of you made her and that he needs to give you a break once in a while. Maybe if he felt the way you do after all you do to keep things in order for him, he may understand why you will not have extra kids aroud or better yet go on strike and tell him that you wont lift one finger to do anything except for yourself until he helps you more. You didnot make your daughter yourself. Good luck. Let me know how this may have helped.Also get your daughter involved with other kids if you can.

Hi C.,
I'd like to help you but I'm not clear on what you are seeking help on. Reply back to me if you can. If I have a suggestion, I'd be more than happy to share it with you.

M.

You both need to go to counseling to work this out. He sounds overbearing about what YOU should be doing. And you sound defensive about being on the Hormone Replacement. It would be nice to see HIM on hormone replacement for a few weeks but since that won't happen, get your issues straightened out before you are really stressed out. Who decided that you had to do all the chores? Why doesn't he pitch in? If you cannot sit down with him and discuss how EVERYBODY should work together in the house, then go see a family counselor. You don't want your daughter having to deal with this too. On the other hand, you not wanting to have kids over because of the medication, doesn't make sense to me. If it is that strong, then you need to reduce the dosage. And kids entertain themselves and the more you have the kids over, the easier it becomes and the less your daughter will need you to entertain her. Don't let your life center around the hormone replacement medication or it will start to consume you.