Holiday Advise Regarding Family Members

Your sister needs to understand that this man is going to part of your family. Even if they don't get married they will still have the bond of this child. Have you asked your sister if she will discriminate against your grandchild since he/she will be biracial? I have a friend that has a biracial grandchild and 2 brothers who will not speak to her because of it, to the extent that they didn't attend either their mother or sisters funeral last year! Your sister needs to open her eyes and understand that this is your family as is a part of hers, if she doesn't want to welcome them in her house that would be her choice, but to miss what is possibly your fathers last Christmas over this is going to haunt her, maybe not now but for many years to come. Good luck and God Bless.

This is possibly your Dad's last Christmas...if he said that your Daughter and her boyfriend are welcome in his home and has put your sister in her place then you should all go. He has made it clear where he stands and if your sister is going to be so narrow-minded and such then it is her problem...not yours.

Please make the most of this time as it will mean everything to you later. When my grandfather was dying my Aunt tried to keep me from going up to see him as she has some issues with my Mom being adopted and not "real" family...my husband packed us up and we were up there in less then 12 hours...normally a 18 hour drive. I was 8 months pregnate with second child and I will forever remember the look in my Grandpa's eyes when he saw me at the door....My Aunt did everything to let us know how mad she was at us for showing up...but I will carry my grandpa's expression of joy and surprise in my heart forever. My Aunt did prevent My Mom and I from seeing my Grandma before she died...in fact we didn't even know she was dying until a couple of days before she died...I regret not being able to say good-bye to her and I will feel that pain forever.

Please do not let anyone come between your daughter and her grandpa.....not even your sister. She will have to answer for her behavior at some point....that is not your problem.

Please know that I will be praying for you and your daughter at this time...Good Luck!!!!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year....maybe a miracle will happen...believe!

Hi R.,
It sounds like your younger sister has made an issue out of something that is really her own problem. Hopefully, your sister will eventually come around and be able to accept their relationship. In the mean time just be loving and kind to her and carry on with the Christmas plans. Let us know how it goes.

R.,

So sorry that you have to go through this with your dad being sick! I would have daughters boyfriend there regardless of what your sister thinks. If your father is alright with it then you shouldn't give it a second thought. This is more for him anyway.

Perhaps a recent event in my family can offer a little comfort to you. Recently my brother and his wife (whome no one likes) moved into my father's home (money problems). It wasn't long before my sister-in-law caused a huge scene in front of about 100 family members and close friends. At my daughter's first birthday party. (we had it at his home because we live in KY and they all live in MI). Well...my dad being the kind of person he is kicked her out. My brother and niece went with her of course. However...the whole family started saying that they don't ever want her around and that she's never welcome into anyone's home. My dad especially.

Well guess what...They all just sat down and had a nice dinner last night.

My point here is that my family loves my brother enough to respect the fact that this is his wife no matter how many problems they may have with her. And that despite the stupid things they said...she's still hangin' around.

Your sister will more than likely come around. If she loves your father then she'll respect that this may be his last Christmas and she'll just have to get over or at least put aside whatever issues she has with your daughter dating and having the baby of someone of a different race. If she doesn't, and this does end up being his last Christmas she'll feel guilty for the rest of her life.

Maybe you should sit with your sister and talk about it with her. Explain that he's a big part of your daughter's life and that you want to make this last Christmas a happy one for your dad. If your dad wants him there it's obviously because he thinks of him as family. Maybe your parents can be there to talk to her too.

I really hope all of this works out for you and your family. And congrats on the grandbaby!

the holidays are about family and it is after all going to be at your house. if you and your hubby don't care and your dad doesn't seem to mind, then that is all that matters. if your sister is selfish anough to let her own stupid prejuudices keep her away from what will probably be her last christmas with her own father, then so be it. it will be more her loss than anybody elses. and good for your dad for standing up for what is he believes in!