Holding #2 In

Try Miralax. It will force him to go. My daughter held hers and ended up stretching the lower part of her colon. You can put a little in juice and it will soften and push things through. it is non addictive. My daughter has been on it for two years. The GI doctor said it will all resolve itself as she gets older. S. d

My son is 4 and he does the same thing. He has had a constipation problem since birth, he has been on miralax for 3 years now. Its so soft he can't hold it, but he is going in his pants and won't tell anybody. Good luck. J.

can you mix something into his sippy of juice? Is he running and playing a lot? Physical exercise is important too. How about cooking veggies and rice in juice- steam them in apple juice. How about broccoli steamed and offer ranch to dip. I would cut out carbs, and give him high veg and fruit diet for several weeks.

my son is 7 and I've been battling the same thing since he was 2.

his paternal grandparents took him to the doc without my knowledge and had him put on Miralax. I dont like resorting to meds, so I changed his diets.

Push fiber - he may be holding it because it hurts to go.
I aim for 13-18 grams of fiber a day for my son. I dont know if thats normal or not, but it keeps his bowels moving and prevents him for holding it for more than a few days at a time.

A medium sized pear as 5.1 grams of fiber. A cup of blueberries has 3.5 grams of fiber. An apple with the skin has 4.4 grams. You said he isn't big on fruit but eats a lot of whole grains.... so here are a couple other high fiber suggestions:
1 cup of whole wheat spagetti has 6.1 grams of fiber.
1 cup of oatmeal has 4 grams. 1 cup of lima beans has 13.1 grams! 1 cup of canned baked beans has 10.4 grams. A cup of peas has 8.8 grams. Air popped (not microwaved) popcorn - 3 cups has 3.6 grams.

I realize that a 2 yr old isnt going to eat that much of this stuff at once, but if you offer some of it several times a day and choose foods that are higher in fiber, he should get enough. Also, fruit juices like pineapple or pear juice also have a lot of fiber.

Another issue - my son still has issues with wiping. He hates that he sometimes misses a spot and then it gets in his underwear. We keep a container of cottonelle wipes or huggies cleanteam wipes in the bathroom. He's a little older so doesnt like the stigma of using "baby" wipes so we had to start using the grown up versions.

Try having him sit on the potty with his feet on a stepstool. That will make it easier for him to pass stool as well.

Suppositories should be avoided because long term use can "train" his body to need them in order to pass a bowel movement.

If he has a poop accident, dont make a big deal about it. He may think poop is dirty or that going #2 is somehow shameful.
Reward him if he sits on the potty and tries to poop, even if nothing happens (even if the reward is just a hug and a "good job") When he is successful with going #2 in the potty, give him something small to show he's done a good job - a sticker, special treat, hotwheels car, whatever he likes and would respond to.

good luck!

Hi A.--I aslo use benefiber and they now have a benefiber for kids (although I just use the regular--no pun intended!). The cool thing is that you can add it to anything you are cooking, for instance I put in homemade cookies and breads as well as mashed potatoes, juice, pretty much anything. You would never know it is there and it isn't a laxative so it won't make him go--it just gives him the fiber he needs to help push it through.
Good luck!

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A.,
this is a very very common thing among boys - most of my nephews did it as well as my own son, I was fortunate that my second son did not. It was a nightmare for my oldest who held his poop for years and years - he finally stopped around perhaps age 7-8? Even now at 12 he does not go every day and ends up running in there to go. A the time they gave him Miralax which was still a prescription at that time...it worked but took several applications before it did in the beginning. I give my kids Benefiber now when they have trouble, but check the label, not sure how young the age goes. It works much better than Miralax in my humble opinion. It is just something boys do, it is very common, surprised the Dr did not tell you that. It has been explained to me as is they feel like they are losing part of themselves every time they go...I know sounds weird but I think it is true. It does end eventually and you are certainly not the first mom to rush to send a kid to potty training earlier than three so they can go to preschool...that happens every day too...I was guilt of it too. Send him in a pull up just in case! Good luck.

Hey A.,

My son was the same way, he would holds his as well. I took him to the Dr. and she prescribed him Miralax (which is now available OTC). It might even be that it hurts when he goes and he doesn't want to go through that pain. The Miralax will help in that aspect as well. Come to find out as well that my son's problem was even after he wiped he still didn't feel clean so he just wouldn't go. I encouraged him to take a shower afterward as well. But this Miralax really helped him and it is very mild. I batteled this problem for years though. I hope this helps.

My dd had the same problem for awhile. We think she had a hard time going once and than go afraid to go. We used Miralax with her. The doctor said that was safe to use with her. It helps to soften it and make her more regular and it seemed to help. Hope that helps!

Pear juice has a natural laxative in it. I think Apple Juice does too. I find the pear juice in with the baby food at the grocery stores.

my little boy has been holding for about a year now too. It started with a hot slim jim that gave him the runs and it burnt his bum, and then he was scared to go. he was potty trained right before this happened, and still pees in the potty until he cant hold his poo any more, but ill get to that. This cycle is hard to break, and he has gone 3-4 weeks with no b.m. He probaly did the same thing mine did, he waited so long to go that it basically exploded from him and really hurt, so hes scared to go. I have tried enemas, kristalose, glucalose, and fiber. He loves fruit-apples, watermelon, cantaloupe, bananas, but it doesnt help him go. I used suppositories and it worked once, i tried it twice a gain with no results. His cycle is hold for as long as possible, then for a a few days he will have "peeping turtles"-poo that tried to come out and he pushes back in, or a little escapes and he gets poo tracks. For that time he will pee on himself and deny the potty entirely. Its so frustrating and i know it hurts him. Research encopresis. I have a appt. with a pediatric gastro-whatever specialist to help him. Im scared he has stretched his insides from this, it can be a serious medical issue. I dont have any real advice beside wait it out, try the glucolose (your doc can prescribe it, its powder you mix in sprite or water) it didnt work for us, but my sister in laws son withheld too and it worked for them. if you want to vent about it hit me up-im going through it too. Ill let you know what the doc says and maybe something he says can help you as well. good luck
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Had this problem with my son. Yours probably had a hard and painful poop one day and now remembers that and associates pain with #2. Give him lots of liquids to soften his stool and encourage him, relax him and remind him he needs to try to poop. You may need to go to the dr. and get a prescription to soften the stool if pushing liquids doesn't help.

Miralax works well when used on a daily basis until he becomes more comfortable using the potty. It is really common for them to have issues with constipation during potty training. Hopefully after several times of success without too much discomfort he will realize it isn't too big of a deal to go. I would check with your peds to see what dose you can give for Miralax, now it is over the counter-they usually base it on your child's weight. Best of luck, hopefully you will get it all worked out before school begins. Take care, J.

Been there, and feel your pain. One thing that's really easy is give him some miralax in his drink. And know, it's just a phase.

One thing that worked for my son, and I'm ashamed to admit it, is bribery. We made a chart, and every time he did his 'business' without holding it in, he got a star. When he got so many stars, we made a trip to a local consignment store and I let him pick out any toy he wanted.
(Yep, I was a former teacher, so it was basically the star system)

hello, A., you are not alone! it is a fairly common prob, esp for boys. we had the same prob with our son. our pediatrician recommended a tsp of milk of magnesia in the morning and at night to soften his stool. after one week, he was pooping in the potty like a pro. unlike some laxative, the milk of mag is not "habit-forming" i.e. they don't get dependent on it. it just softens enough to keep them from holding it in forever.

good luck and you can do it!!! =)

R.

It looks as though you have received a lot of good advice. I held my in for years, as a girl, because I had a negative experience with "poopooing." I was a teen before anyone noticed. They ran tests to see if I had any side effects from only doing it twice a month. I did not and the doctor suggested a high fiber diet with lots of fruits and juices. Well, I was already eating that, but psychologically I could not get past that bad event and would not let go. Once I understood what was going on (as a teen), I gradually started letting go. I said all that to say that if the juices or Miralax don't work, please don't fret. He will go when he is ready and he will be fine.

my daughter drinks a lot of Motts for Tots apple juice and I think that helps? it seems to keep her regular and gives her fruit juice and it is also 40% water. Good luck.

It is normal for a 2 year old to resist going to the bathroom. IT interfers with their play. I got a musical potty for my daughter and she loved it. I would not make a big deal out of it or you may make the problem worse. And some people only need to defacate once a week.

The best way to get a 2 year old to eat more fruit is to sneak it in their food. I make smoothies, add applesauce or other pureed fruit to my cakes, cookies, breads, muffins, etc.....
Continue offering different kinds of fruit when you can. Also make sure you eat your fruit too. They will copy what you do. Your son is just exerting his independence. That is normal for a 2 year old. Good luck.

I have read many of these responses, and while the doc and many other moms say this can be normal, I had an experience much like "Barri" relates.

My oldest son, from the time he was a year old and transitioned from regular baby foods to finger foods and toddler foods, became VERY VERY picky. He would no longer eat most fruits/veggies - he spit the chunks out of the Stage 3 foods and Toddler stuff. Only solids he would eat were cheese, crackers, meats, and occasionally bananas and grapes. He also LOVED his milk - when we stopped formula, we gave him whole milk with Chocolate Ovaltine for extra nutrients, and also continued to give him the PolyViSol vitamin drops the pediatrician had recommended. What I didn't realize as a new mom, was that all that dairy and the iron in his vitamins, and the lack of fiber from veggies and fruits was seriously constipating him. He started this well before we started potty training him. He would not poop for 3-4 days and then start crying and squatting and we tried to "walk it out" around the house. I tried suppositories and they usually came back out without having time to work. We dropped the iron-foritified vitamins and used a children's laxative (I think it was the juvenile version of Senokot - I can't remember from 1997!). I mixed that in with his chocolate ovaltine, since he wouldn't give up milk and the laxative was supposed to be "chocolate flavored"! Ew!

Anyway, this helped somewhat, but by the time we did start potty-training, he would resist again, simply b/c he had always been standing up holding my hands as we walked the house to get things out. He could NOT sit to do the business! So the cycle got worse again. The scariest moment was when he was almost 4 and had finally potty-trained. He felt like he had to poopy again, about an hour after doing so. He went to the potty and pushed for a while, and then started calling for me, saying it was stuck again. (We'd had to use Qtips in the past to help pull it out! They tell you not to insert any objects into their bottoms, but as soon as I would see something, if his pain was bad enough, I had to help it come out! Horrible!) So I went to check and could see SOMETHING hanging out his hiney, but it wasn't poop-colored - it looked pink! I pulled him forward and realized it was skin - he had pooped his insides out! I totally freaked! I called the emergency number for his doc and they said it probably doesn't hurt him badly and that I just had to use my finger to gently push it back up inside. They called it a prolapsed rectum, and said it rarely recurs. I did it, and it didn't seem to bother him. They said his body had probably pushed so hard earlier that the nerves were still sending the signal that something was in there. Blessedly, it never happened again!

My son is now 12 and still only poops every 2-4 days usually. And is still picky about fruits and veggies - but we have found a few he will eat. I don't use laxatives anymore unless we have to, but it is rare now.

So study your son's diet, sneak things in - that suggestion about the Benefiber mixed in everything is a good one! I used to mix baby food pureed prunes into stuff - it doesn't mix well with much though! I had a recipe once for Devil's Food Cake cupcakes that you mixed pureed prunes into and you couldn't taste it. It worked - just made the cake very thick and heavy - not cakelike and of course, my son didn't like that texture, so it didn't work too well for him after all. But the taste was fine! Oh and if I cut up bananas onto All Bran cereal and let the cereal get really soggy with milk, he actually ate that for a while! Yuck! :)

Find whatever method will work gently and gradually - alot of times we ended up with diarrhea from too much laxative stuff and that made him hate pooping even more!

Probably more info than you wanted, but if even one of these experiences/suggestions helps, I am glad. Sometimes what other people think is normal is not even close to what you are going through and just waiting it out will only make it worse. Use your judgement to follow whatever advice makes sense and seems to work. Breaking the cycle soon will be better in the long run! We suffered for years, and occasionally still do, so do what you have to for your child!

Blessings,
A.
PS - As a side note, my second son didn't like milk, loved juice and even though I watered it down alot, he ate ALL THE TIME, and just about anything! As a result, around age 15 months for about a year or so, he had what they call Todder Diarrhea! 7 or 8 very messy diapers a day!!! Talk about your extremes!

Try this it has worked for some.Sunsweet's PlumSmart 1/2 cup or 1 cup will do the trick.Blend the ice & PlumSmart togather.To make it look more interresting to him.Let Him over hear you talking about How His Fav. Cartoon & How the carttons Loves it.Then make it & ask Him if He knows Who's Fav.Drink it is.HA!May You have a Stinking GREAT Summer LoL!May your "School Years" Be GREAT Also!

Probably the more attention he gets for it, the more he'll do it. Sorry, but that's just the nature of kids. He won't die if he doesn't poo for a week or two (I know. I have always had slow bowels). Give HIM control of his own bowels and stay out of it because it probably IS a 'control' issue, & if you 'give up' control and let him HAVE control, you both win. Just lay low. I wouldn't try any bowel stimulants, stool softeners, etc. til I just 'let it ride' for at least a month.

This is a common problem among little boys and most of us have been the same route with pediatricians, gastroenterologist, and advice from everyone else. Basic things you need to do: (1) keep his eating and sleeping on a schedule. If you can find out in advance what the schedule will be like in pre-school it would help to start making changes toward that schedule. (2) After each meal wait 10 minutes and then ask your son to sit on the potty for 5 minutes minimum. He must sit quietly and still, so give him a book or toy so it won't be like torture. (3) Sounds like you have a good grip on the importance of fiber and a balanced diet. Keep offering the fruit but let it be his choice, some blood types don't like or need fruit.

I've got two sons who suffered with the same issue. One is 12 yo and the other is 7 yo. We've been through all the doctors and family advice we can handle and I understand having to use suppositories. I hated it too. My best results were with a supplement called CALM, you can find it at whole foods or herbal harvest. It is simply calcium and magnesium and I add it to their morning juice. It keeps their bowels regular and soft so they don't have discomfort when passing them. I'd start your little one on a teaspoon per morning and adjust the dose according to the consistency of his bowels. This is all natural and non-addictive. The best explanation I have for this is that most males perfer to have a bowel at home in their relaxed environment. My boys won't have a bowel at school unless its absolutely necessary. Because our children grown in size and develop quickly in the first few years, their bodies are constantly making hormones that make their muscles and skin relax so it can handle the fast growth. These hormones also relax the organs in the inside, especially the bowel muscle. Because they are male and can choose to sit or stand when they go to the rest room, they can also master the ability to hold a bowel with great accuracy.

Hope this helps! A. B., Hillsborough, NC

A girlfriend of mine has the same issue. She gives her son a laxative (I think miralax) everyday and has to do a suppository about once a month. She has had great success with the laxative. My son on the other hand is quite proud of his #2s....could you reward him with something for pooing? Something he loves like 5 M&Ms per poo. I know bribery isn't always the best way but a healthy poo routine certainly eclipses that inappropriateness. Good luck.

Do you let him have time in the bathroom by himself? Maybe he's embarresed to go in front of you. Try giving him a little privacy and then have him call for you when hes done to wipe. Just a thought I had.

A..I have been through this too. My advice to you is to #1 back off. I know you want him trained before school starts but if you show apprehension he will sense that for sure and continue to hold it in. It takes longer to train a boy than a girl, usually. #2 This is a crucial time for your son. If he continues to hold it in he raises the risk of damaging his sphincter. There is a nerve at the end of his bottom that can deaden if the stool continues like that. Then it takes years of therapy to get it back.
My point is this: When I was going through this with my son the doctor told ME to relax and not force him to push. I was to take him to the potty at a set time every day just for pooing. My son knew what was supposed to happen at that time too. If he didn't go then we waited and went back a little later. I was not allowed to get upset at him and make him feel like a failure if he didn't go. I brought in books and toys to occupy him while sitting on the toilet.
My son ended up with a damaged sphincter because he was 4 before I could get the pediatrician to refer me to a specialist. He was 11 before his sphincter nerve came back to life again. Now he is fine.
There is a special juice out there with super high fiber that kids love. I can't seem to remember the name but your doc may know. That can help soften the stool. Doc also told me that my son at one time probably had a hard stool that hurt his bottom and then he became afraid it would happen again therefore he began holding it in. This juice or some other natural softener might help with that. Good luck.

I won't be much help but hopefully this will help a bit. This happened to a friend and she had to put a laxative type thing into his drink, a liquid that she put in it daily. I think it begins with an "M". You can ask your doctor, it is added to their drink.

If you cannot get anywhere with your doc finding out what it is, let me know and I will ask my friend for you.

W. M ____@____.com

Have you discussed stool softeners with your doctor? Your little one may be experiencing a bit of pain when he goes. Stool softeners would take that part away and make it less scary "to go".

yes it is normal and yes it is a behavior instead of a medical problem. I haven't heard of too many kids that don't hold it in at some point for a time. My little girl is doing that also and this is what the pediatrician told me do:
She said to get some Mirilax. It is not a laxative. It is a stool softener so it doesn't hurt her to take it every day and it is not harsh. She told me to put a 1/2 to a whole cap full in juice or milk, stir it up really good and let him drink that. It makes it soft so he will go. My ped. told me that the reason they hold it is because they are too busy to take the time to go and the longer the hold it the harder it gets. The harder it gets, they get scared to let it go. So this Mirilax softens it and they will go. I don't do this every day but I did for a while. If it seems to runny, then you may want to put a little less in next time. It is something you have to kind of use to figure out how much to use. It really did help. If it gets too much, it is soft and starts to come on out so they can't deny it and have to go whereas if it is hard they can keep holding it till it gets impacted and that wouldn't be good.
Good luck.