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Ok, a few weeks ago my 10yr old daughter informed me that my 4yr old son has been sneaking candy early in the morning before anyone gets up. Low and behold the trash in the kids bathroom was filled with wrappers. Once the candy was gone, he moved on to anything else he wanted from the cupboard. We kept talking to him but he kept taking the stuff. He would even climb over and under the gate we put at the doorway to come upstairs. He doesn't do it every day, but enough to be a concern. We started locking the cupboard and he didn't take anything for a few days. This morning my husband found a cheese wrapper under my sons pillow (which was not there last night) and later in the day I found a Teddy Graham package (empty) with another cheese wrapper in it. Now he has seemed to move on to the refrigerator and the box on the counter with the 10 calorie pack snacks. Than I found an empty Bug juice bottle in the family room - which was his sisters and was in the refrigerator. Also, I noticed that we are missing a whole package of cookies from the cupboard and I have to question him of this when he gets up from his nap.
Before the sneaking of the food he was always stealing Dads stuff or his sisters.. He won't stop - we have tried talking to him, taking aways toys (to the point where his room had nothing but a bed and dresser), telling him we would have to talk to the police about stealing and NOTHING works. Just yesterday my daughter found 2 of her hair ciips under his pillow - one of which was broke (these were in a locked cabinet in the bathroom, but he sqeezed his arm in and took them).
I am at my whits end on what to do. Has this happened to you??? If so, what did you do??
~~~~~~Oh and in case you are wondering - he eats plenty during the day and when we ask him why he does it, he says he is hungry~~~~~~~~
He is healthy and he had his Iron level checked in November and it was great. He is almost 100% for height and weight... He doesn't drink pop and Juice is limited to maybe 2-3x a week. He loves his fruit and veggies. We think it may have to do with wanting more attention.
I would have him evaluated by a psychiatrist. Something is definitely going on, considering he is stealing things other than food. If he is in preschool or pre-K, the school district should be able to help you.
Step 1- take all sweets and treats out of the house!
Step 2- don't give him any more attention for this behavior!
Step 3- clearly let him know what items in the house are off limits.
Step 4- (if he understands what items are off limits) ask him why he felt he had the right to touch the item. And see what the response is. Ask him to put it back and not touch it again. Now he should know.
Step 5- If he takes that same item again. He will have a punishment-such as a time out or loss of want (TV, game, . . .) Let him know you are "very disappointed in him"
Step 6- Give lots of positives for other good behaviors
Step 7 relax it is a phase / do not waste your time and money on drs. They will tell you to do Step 1 through 6.
S
I agree with Claudia. Talk to your Dr. make sure there is nothing medically wrong with him. Then talk to your Dr. to see if they can refer you to a child shrink or if they no what else you can try.
You may want to leave healthy snacks out for him to have. Don't let him know that they are for him, but leave them someplace easy for him to get.
some kids are all day snackers rather then eating 3 meals, and there is nothing wrong with that. Also him going and getting his own food is him being independent. Maybe his body needs that bit of food more then just at meals and one snack.... he says he is hungry, listen to him... if he is not over weight then maybe he really does need that food even if you don't think so.
I have been that way ever since I was 2... I have always been independent taking care of what I need myself. My mom would just set out items that I can eat all day long in a dived tray in the fridge (veggies, fruit, trail mix (with some chocolate in it), cheese and meat). She also had a cup/juice box/water bottle with my name on it at all times in the fridge so if I got thirst I knew what I could take. I hated asking for help and felt better if I did it myself. Try not to be hard on him, everyone eats differently and if he is healthy then why worry?
P.S. As the other moms said get some other blood work and test done to make sure he has no 'hidden' issue that he is trying to deal with
Have him checked for glycemias or diabetes. Also, have your pediatrician refer a nutritionalist. While he may be getting plenty to eat, maybe he's not getting enough of something he needs, or maybe he needs more then he's already getting. If his diet includes alot of the typical kid food-fare like boxed macaroni, prepackaged items like Teddy Grahams etc. these items have alot of empty calories, hydrolyzed fats, and additives and sugars that can actually make you more hungry. Is he drinking alot of soda pops or juice which has alot of sugar? Sugar is a huge culprit too can give you a feeling of fullness but offer little good calories etc. when you need it, leaving you hungry later. Even if you're eating regular servings of food. The best way to know where he's at nutritionally speaking is to have your pediatrician order an exam specifically geared toward finding this out.
Hi K.,
Have you had his nutritional levels checked.
He's only four. I don't think they do things intentionally at that age. There's got to be a reason why he's doing what he's doing. It seems to me his body is craving food.
Our daughter at age 2, was eating sand all the time. And it was getting me upset, because I would tell her time & time again that that was yucky, but she would still put fistfuls in her mouth. Only to find out that she was profoundly anemic.
I would get his blood work done and test his blood sugars and over all blood work.
God Bless,
J.
Since it's not just food that he takes, and obviously he's not needing/wanting the hair clips other than to maybe try on, I think it may be a compulsive type behavior. Have him evaluated by a good child psychologist and they can work with both of you to come up with a behavior plan or refer to a child psychiatrist if it's a neurological disorder like OCD or ADHD. My dd is ADHD and was often caught stealing. Maturity and stimulants took away her compulsion to take money or things from her brother's room, but last year she had a big issue with taking food and hiding it in her room. If I found a box of pop tarts or wrappers up there then she was forbidden to have pop tarts even with permission for a month, or until our supply ran out. She's a skinny little thing so I'm not worried about the calories, just the disobedient, sneaky behavior. AT a young age her child psych. said we should probably lock all snacks up, but we havn't gotten to that point yet. My guess is we will need to eventually for alcohol when she becomes a teen, just knowing her tendencies now.
K.,
I'm not sure who you should talk to but I am concerned about his stealing. I have a sibling that started stealing things at about the age of 4 years, at first little things like candy or change from her siblings. She would be punished of course if she was caught. However the stealing did not stop it just got worse. As we got older she would take CDs, money, clothes etc. She was caught shoplifting as a teen.
I would suggest taking him to the Pediatrician and getting labs done to see if there is some underlying medical problem. You could try talking to a psychologist who works with children as well.
