Helping My 10 Year Old from Being Overweight

I was pretty overweight at that age too. At around 11 I started getting more aware of myself and took the weight off. I never felt pushed by my mom or anything but I think what she did was she told me that diet soda tasted sweet but had not calories so I decided that I would drink diet. Now a lot of people don't even do soda, but if you guys do, maybe she can switch to diet for the occasional soda. Also, my mom had no cookies, candy, cakes, ice-cream,etc. in the house. If we wanted a treat she took us out to frozen yogurt or for a small cone at mc'donalds. Those are lower calorie options and I liked it just fine. You can do things like make jello sometimes as well, again sweet with minimal calories. I think to this day a major reason I kept my weight off for most of my life is because I had a habit of not having that kind of stuff in the house. Now that I had a baby, it is another story!!lol So anyway, I think by just steering her in the right direction with how to have a few sweet treats and not making it a big thing, you might really help her learn how to eat healthy all on her own. Hang in there!:)

I have been looking at the answers to this problem and I am really upset about my nephew. His dad and my sister are so overweight It is awful to see. Her husband is something like 6'4" and quit his job because he has back trouble. He can't get disability because everyone at his weight would have back problems. Although he got someone to give him oxycontin so he sits in his chair 24x7 and eats. Before the summer started he had lost 70 pounds that no one noticed. I do think something is wrong but this means he is home everyday with my nephew and I think all they do is eat. At the beginning of the summer my nephew looked good. He was doing Tae Kwon Do and he was husky but okay. He wanted to go biking but my sister said she did not have time. This weekend we went swimming and he had rolls of fat. Really, rolls. He is about 5' 6" and 200 pounds to 220 pounds. Again he is 10. He will grow more but not some magical bean sprout.

So, at the pool we ordered lunch at one of the tables and everyone got their food and settled in for a nice lunch. Grandma,(my mom) my sister, y large nephew by my large sister, and another nephew and niece. The mood was fun and happy because we don't get together often. When my nephew got his he took his hamburger and walked down a row of lounge chairs and sat and ate by himself.

My nephew knows good foods and bad. Knows he should exercise. Used to hang out with the neighborhood kids but I asked and he got defensive.

All I hear is oooh-don't talk to him. You will crush his self esteem. I would like to know how to help him. I have given him passes to the workout place I go. Have biked with him. Tae Kwon Do.

If he were an alcoholic or drug user we would help but obesity we seem to sweep under the rug. Any ideras?

hi K.~
My daughter had the same problem when she was your daughter's age (she is now 17). I basically made it all about me. That I needed to eat healthier, get more exercise. I included her in the grocery shopping, having her pick out what kind of rice crackers etc. to get as well as asking her for suggestions as to what I could eat that was healthy but still tasted good. We still had occassional junk food in the house but replaced chips etc with popcorn, pretzels, nuts etc. I tried to take all the sweets out of the house but all that did was make her rebellious and she would buy them at school etc. I bought very dark chocolate and she had one square a day, which seemed to satisfy her sweet tooth. We also had dessert once a week and I let her decide on what we would have. I did remove all soda, both regular and diet since they contribute to children ending up with type 2 diabetes (which I have). I replaced them with green tea and flavored water (which my daughter loves). I also told her I needed her to walk with me in the evenings because I couldn't do it by myself.. that I needed her to keep me on track. We got a Wii and the whole family plays the sports together. 10 yrs.~13 yrs is a really difficult time for kids and with all the changes in their bodies, it's hard to know how they will react. We started the changes in diet and exercise slowly, over a period of three months or so and now my daughter is very selfconfident and makes much healthier choices. She knows that she can have sweets but in moderation and never overindulges. I hope this helps.

I understand your concern, but what does her doctor say? My son has always been in the HIGH 90's or even off the charts for height & weight. At 4yo, he is bigger than a lot of 6yo's! We've asked our pedi before about how much he eats, what he eats (he goes through stages where he only eats meat, then he'll only eat veggies/carbs), and the fact that he sometimes eats as much or more than I do. She says he's perfectly proportionate & absolutely fine.

My sis & I were always so scrawny as kids that people thought we were anorexic or my parents were starving us (though we ate plenty!), so it's a whole new game for me to have such a big boy. I have started working in healthier foods while I try to get back in shape, and the whole family is on the bandwagon, even my very skeptical hubby!

There are lots of simple substitutions you can make in your everday recipes which cut down a lot of the fat. We are experimenting as a family with new veggies and it's really great! My son even loves to help do the shopping & cook with me and try new things. Does your daughter like to cook? Maybe you could get her involved- and make it about getting healthy & making healthier choices for the family rather than making it about her weight.

Also keep in mind that some people just have bigger bone structures and won't be thin ever. Once I hit puberty, I jumped from a size 12 in girls to a 7 in juniors overnight- and I was stick thin, only 87 lbs! That's just the way my body is shaped.

It is great that she is doing soccer. That is more than most kids seem to be doing anymore.

I will tell you to give her a no fail enviroment at home. That will mean changes for everyone invovled though. Taking sweets out of the house and high sodium foods to start. (Chips, and premade meals). If you think that would be too dramatic of a change you can slowly take out some foods as they get eaten stop replacing them. Or you can go as dramtic as cleaning out the panty and donating all the bad food and starting fresh. I have found that it is cheaper to eat freash foods as a family than premade items.

You can also start family excersise times once or twice a week. Even if it is just going on a walk for 30 minutes. That way the focus is not on her but on the family getting healthy. Also, spending time together by eatig meals together will help her on many levels knowing that she is not alone.

She probably knows she is overweight kids a cruel at a very young age. Taking steps now though will help her transition through the tween stage that is hard enough on all of us females. Good luck to you on this journey. I wish you all the best.