Help with Twins to Sleep on Same Schedule

I have 11 month old twins and a 2 1/2 year old son. I eventually let my twins cry it out when they were 5 months old but made the mistake of splitting them up. Now one sleeps in the guest room and the other in their room. I think I'm going to have to let them cry it out again together now since we have so many visitors coming this summer and we need the guest room. So, if you're going to let him/them cry, I would put them in the same room to do it unless you plan to keep them apart. Good luck!

K....boys need more cuddling than girls...so he might be suffering from tenseness which his sleeplessness brings on. (It is much easier to cuddle the happy baby!)

The daycare might have something to do with the problem. Though both likely are in the same dc, their situations could be different. Maybe the same thing as at home; a fussy baby doesn't get the cuddling that the 'easygoer' receives...AND THEY KNOW IT. Sadly, girls frequently are seen as 'cuter'; and, again, they get more 'comfort' holding...softer words, etc.

Look for these things. Also some eardrops may relieve any pain there. Even to wipe the entrance of the ear with a bit of Listerine on a Q tip can do great things. (I use that trick for myself when congestion makes my head uncomfortable. Great for colds, etc.)

Perhaps getting her to sleep first, and giving him a few extra cuddly moments might make him more at ease.

ESPECIALLY guard against letting yourself be irritated (it shows in the voice/handling) when he needs attention. ("THERE HE GOES AGAIN...disturbing our sleep"...can really bring out the worst in us!)

(I am Mom to nine...with nine younger siblings in my life. Even five that were older than myself. My mom raised 16. I stopped counting grandchildren/greatgrandchildren at about 30.)

KayMarie

Hi K.,

My twins are 2 and neither slept through the night without any wakeups until 11 months so your lucky! In our experience, if they are going to sleep, they'll sleep through anything. But, if you really want to try cry it out, you might need to separate them for that.

My big thing is just trying to be consistent. Try not feeding him first and then, if he still needs it, go ahead and give it to him. Some babies just need that. My girls were both getting feedings over night until 11 months and they sleep great now and have ever since. They still share a room, too.

I know it's so hard. That first year is really tough. That part defintely does get easier!

Hi, I have 22 month old twins who also had sleep issues. We used to hold the boys until they were asleep every night which just got to be too demanding on my husband and i so we decided to just put them down when we thought they were ready for bed for the night. That worked for one of our twins but not the other. they also slept in the same room. We have a guest room with a pack and play set up so that if one of the babies was fussing I would immediately move that baby and let them "cry it out". It wasn't always easy but eventually it worked. Now they sleep in the same room 99.9% of the time all night with no problem. I still nap the babies in separate rooms because they just get more peaceful sleep that way. I read a wonderful book on sleep training called 'Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child'. Unfortunatly i didn't read it until my boys were 11 mos. so you are already ahead of the game! Good luck. I understand!
K.

You are right, twins are ALOT of work!!!! Mine are 4 (both boys), and it still is demanding, but it does seem to be getting easier. Your situation sounds very familiar, when the twins turned one, my husband and I had enough. At 8:00 we put them to bed and left them fall asleep on there own. It took about 1 week, but I was amazed that one could fall asleep when the other was still crying. I think they got used to hearing the other one. It was the BEST thing we could have done. They started taking longer, scheduled naps and I knew that there was a set end to my day (8:00). I felt like a new woman and that I could handle anything. Good luck w/ your twins and it does get easier, I have been there.

My boy/girl twins are 17 months. Similiar scenerio with the sleeping - she slept through at 3 months - but my son did not until he was a year. I started taking her out of their room and putting her in the guest room at night, so that he wouldn't wake her. I did have to start letting him cry it out b/c after nearly a year I had to start getting a full nights sleep or I was going to die! I also started giving him less and less formula in the bottles I gave him when he woke up in the middle of the night...each week I would give him an ounce less...trying to ween him of the dependance/habit. I still give him a bottle before bed (I know some ppl dont approve at this age....but you know how hard it is with twins), and I add cereal to help him sleep. GOOD LUCK....it will eventually happen, don't get too frustrated...some just take longer than others. It is so hard having twins...i would never have imagined it would be this difficult and completely and totally exhausting every single day!!!! But they will always have each other and that special bond!!!!

Hi K.

The only idea I had was maybe to put your daughter in with your older son for a few nights/week and work with the other guy's sleep issues. I think you might have more success and less anxiety about her waking if she was not disturbed by the process. I had to do cry it out with both of my kids at about 6 months when I could no longer take the sleepless nights. It only took a few nights. I would start him on whatever time you want him going to bed, and go from there. Do bedtime routine, put him in the crib sleepy but awake. Then try 5 or 10 minute intervals escalating in length. Check on him but don't take him out. Simple calming measures, " hi baby, you're ok and Mommy loves you" then leave again. The idea is to let him know you are here, but he must stay in the crib and sleep. It doesn't take long before they just stay asleep because they don't have any reason to keep waking.
Good Luck to you.

I have never had to deal with a sleep schedule for twins, but I have had to deal with 5 different children's sleep habits. Our first two were great. They slept all night starting in the hospital. They, also, took two long naps during the day. Child number three was a rude awaking to sleeplessness. She would only sleep if I held her whether I was sitting, standing, or had her laying on my chest. Cat naps were a brief daily luxury that were very few and far between. She didn't begin sleeping all night until she was almost 2 1/2 years old. We tried many things, but her will power out lasted ours. Child number four was better than our third but not quite as good as the first two. She only woke through the night to nurse a few minutes and went back to sleep until morning. She did take a good daily nap, too. Baby number five was similar to our fourth at night, but identical to his oldest sister and brother for taking two long daily naps.

Each child is unique and individual. Some people put a lot into strict schedules, but I prefer flexible ones that change as life does. This is no help I know, but eventually they do outgrow it and will sleep all night. You just need to pace yourself for a marathon and not a sprint.

Hi K.,

I have 1 year old twin girls and a 3 1/2 year old daughter. I think the best thing to do it let him cry it out. I know my twins usually don't wake one another up. When I put them to bed, usually around 7-8, one usually falls asleep while the other cries. I let them cry and just keep checking on them. I made the mistake with my first daughter to keep picking her up and rocking her. She didn't sleep the first year and a half of her life. If my girls are fussy, I sometimes give them a bottle with water in it. That makes them comfy too. They were never binky kids either. They just started liking blankies. You could always try that! Good luck. It is so frustrating!

I agree with Regina- keep them in the same room and let them cry it out. Our twins (also a boy and a girl) were always on the same schedule whether they both felt like sleeping or not, and it has worked out great. They are almost 3 now, and are still on the same schedule. Twins are supposedly so used to each other that they can "tune out" one another's cries, and we have found that to be true with ours. Best of luck and let us know how things work out.