Help with Sleeping Through the Night

I have two kids who are great sleepers but they are not born that way. You have to help them a little bit. I would get the book heathy sleep habits happy baby. it is hard to do what he tells you to do. However, a sleeping baby= a rested and happy mother.

Hi, you said you started him on food, does cereal help? Its been a long time, but I seem to remember being told by the girls I worked with to give my son cereal when he wasn't sleeping through the night. I used to mix it with formula and give it to him in a bottle. That seemed to do the trick. He was all boy and the milk just wasn't enough for him. Good luck hope this will help.

Feed him right before bed and then stop night time feeding.
If there is nothing to wake for then why get up. I also use a slightly larger size diaper at night, so we go from 930p-530a with the same one as he is sleepng.

Welcome to the 1st year of life! My 14 month old son started sleeping through the night around 11 months. He would go a month here or there and then the schedule would change as soon as we got used to it! I tried everything and finally my doc told me some kids just don't need as much sleep as others. I'm here to tell you there is hope - all of a sudden around 11 months it clicked for him - he sleeps pretty well through the night and takes a 2.5 hour nap in the morning and another 1 hour in the afternoon. i found that really sticking to a scheduled helped so much - after he wakes up it is exactly 2.5 hours before his morning nap - if I miss the window of opportunity it gets all screwed up again. Another thing no one ever told me - when they are teething or get sick you have to start all over with the sleeping schedule - they get so off track. Anyway - don't get discouraged - the waking up in the middle of the night like that should be just a phase - hang in there!

K.

I am a fan of Elizabeth Pantley's "The No-Cry Sleep Solution". My daughter has been sleeping through the night since she was about 8 weeks old, but the book has lots of information about how to solve all kinds of sleep problems without using the "cry it out" method. I'm using her advice to help my daughter (a cat napper herself) nap longer during the day, so that she can have 2 good, long naps, instead of 3 short ones. After we solve that problem, I'm going to use her methods to help my daughter learn to fall asleep on her own.

On occasion my daughter does wake up during the middle of the night and is wide awake and ready to go. Unfortunately, I usually don't have the discipline to stay awake and try to put her asleep conventional ways. I usually just put her in bed with me or lay down on a blanket in the floor with her and let her nurse to sleep. It usually works, but isn't necessarily something I really want to continue. I know it's difficult. Good luck!

Sounds like he still has his days and nights mixed up the tiniest bit. Try elizabeth pantley's "The no-cry sleep solution" for tips on how to get him to sleep longer in the day and don't cut out the afternoon nap- good solid naps during the day beget good, solid sleep at night! 30 minutes doesn't count- he needs at least an hour at a time. Also- if you have started him on food already, he may not be getting enough calories throughout the day. I made this mistake with my daughter at 6 months. We were so excited to start solids, and she LOVED the cereal, but hten she started waking more often in the night and was previously a great sleeper. When I cut out a feeding of cereal and replaced it with milk, we suddenly eliminated her midnight waking.

Every now and then I'l hear of a child who doesn't sleep thru the night until they're 6-7 months and sometimes they don't until they are walking. Might have something to do with the amount of exercise they do during the day. I know that sounds strange but if you think about it, once they walk or crawl they do tire themselves out faster. You can lay him on his tummy at night on the floor with you (or bed) with toys and play for an hour. Then a warm bath to calm him down and then the bottle or nurse. He may then be tired enough to sleep 6-7 hours...better for you than what you get now. Good luck mommy. Remember that all kids are different and just sleep when you can during the day to make up for the evening. These really are the best times of your life. You'll laugh about it when he's older and miss those days.

Hi C.!
I know a lot of people don't believe in crying it out, but my pediatrician told me that a baby should be able to sleep through the night by about 4 months. I have 3 kids and I read The Baby Whisperer and followed that plan with all 3 & it really works. I know all babies are different, but the book is great. It follows the E.A.S.Y plan (eat, activity, sleep, "you" time) As someone already said a baby should only be up at most 2 hrs at a time and then they should take a nap or bedtime. I wouldn't recommend cutting any naps shorter. So when your baby wakes in the morning start out the EASY plan, and continue throughout the day. My babies at that age went to bed at around 8 P.M. and slept 11-12 hrs. I would try to let them him cry it out. If you keep going in his room now and getting him up it'll never stop. Trust me....try to stop it now or it'll get worse. I would say let him cry it out for about 10 minutes the first night, and then go in. As I was told a 4 month old shouldn't need to eat in the middle of the night, as long as he is getting enough during the day. Ask your pediatrician, but this is the advise I got and I have 3 kids (5, 2, & 1) who sleep in their OWN beds/crib and sleep through the night since 2 months old. Good Luck! I know how hard it is in the beginning! (Get the book it is so worth it!)

Little one's can start developing habits that may need patience in changing. First, I would probably move his bedtime hour back so that he goes to bed shortly before you do. Does he cry when he wakes? Sometimes they will wimper themselves back to sleep. My little ones would wake but then play themselves back to sleep. If they would wake crying and would not stop, I would go in and keeping the lights off without much interaction, change their diaper and put them back in the crib. I found that with my first one that when I went in, turned the lights on low and talked to my little one it made it worse.

PS-also a warm bath before bed may help.

Good luck,

H.

I'm in the exact same situation!!! My son is just 4 months old, and has had very similar sleep patterns. Just this week, I have started to nurse him on every odd hour during the day (9am, 11am, 1pm, 3pm, etc.) and it has helped tremendously. He had only been sleeping 1 1/2- 2 hours at a time during the night, and since I started nursing him every other hour, he'll sleep up to four hours at a time.
I know it sounds counterintuitive to nurse him so much because it might seem like he'd get used to nursing more frequently, but it works! I also did this with my older two kids when they were babies, and it worked with them as well.
Hope that helps!

Hi C.,
Of course every baby is different, and I hate to tell you this, but my daughter didn't sleep throught the night until 8 months. She was up probably twice a night at least at 4 1/2 months. At 8 months we finally had to do some "tough love." When she woke up we peeked in the room to make sure she was safe and then we just let her cry. It took about a week and it was awful for all of us. My husband and I felt like a horrible neglectful mom and dad and from the way she yelled I'm sure our daughter was pretty mad. BUT at the end of the week, all three of us were sleeping through the night for the first time since she'd been born (before that for me!). All of you have to be at the point where you're ready to do that though. It really is hard to fight the go-to-baby instincts and just let them cry. Good luck! Mary-Claire

get a babyinabag.com. my 5 month old sleeps all night about 3 nights per week. i've found that she wakes up more if she's cold. good luck.

My son was born at 3:00 am and he was nocturnal for months, used to drive me crazy. I found that if you feed him, change him, then go back to bed, eventually he will learn he is not going to get the stimulation he wants and will soon learn its time to sleep. So do your thing, then put him back in his crib and go back to sleep. He will be ok, and you will get your sleep. Interacting with him at that time will only reinforce the fact that its ok to be up and about at this time.

Hi C.:

I am a mother of two girls,
Both are smart, beautiful, and well adjusted kids. When they were born, I would get up constantly through the night for the first few weeks. However, I realized early on that if I were going to be any good to them or myself, I was going to have to change my way of doing things. You have to gain control early on with your children so that it will not be difficult later on in life. I know this sounds terrible, but I stopped responding to every cry in the middle of the night and by eight weeks of age, both of them were sleeping soundly through the night. My family and friends were amazed.

I would make sure your child gets all of his nutrition during the day. If you continue to get up with him during the night he will continue to get up. He still needs his naps during the day. I believe babies need 14 hours of sleep in 24 hours. When you go in his room at night just makes sure his needs are met with the least amount of stimulation as possible- less light, less touch, less noise etc..

I say this now because I did this with my first born son as well and he was well over a year before he slept through the night. it gets harder as they get older. my second son-was a lot easier.

good luck!

I know moms don't really have the time to read books, but I was really happy with the results I got from reading "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Mark Weissbluth. The book will encourage you to let your baby cry it out, which is hard, but it worked for me and my husband...we're expecting #2 in October and I won't wait as long as I did with my daughter to try it. Good luck!

I heard great things about this women...
Kathy Sinclair, she also has a website which describes her services and pricing.

www.babysleepsolutionsla.com

Good Luck

Well at that age they are going to wake up atleast once to eat. But with mine I had to learn to feed them with lights off and no talking so as to keep them groggy...and then just lay them back down when they are done. Walk out and if they cry pat their bottom and shush them a few minutes then walk out again. Do that every 15 minutes or so until they go back to sleep and figure out that night is for sleeping.

The more you handle him, the more alert he will become and want to be awake. At 4 1/2 months they can't put up much of a fuss, so just feed him in the dark with no talking and then lay him down...maybe a few pats and shushes and then walk out.

C., you have heard it a couple of times already, but WEISSBLUTH!!! Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. Pick the extreme or non-extreme in the book that works for you. HOWEVER, keep in mind that your baby might still wake up at least once a night to feed up until 9 months - ugh, I know.
This book will change your life and your baby's. Happy sleep parenting.

I have the same problem off and on with my 6 month old. What has happened with her is that I try to keep her up during some of the "power naps" (as we call them) and play with her. Then she will sleep through the night sometimes. At night, I just try to ignore her when she wakes up. She "sonars" to try and see if anyone else is awake to play with her. And when no one comes to her she talks to herself and plays with herself until she falls back to sleep on her own. She normally falls back to sleep about half an hour later. The hard thing is that we share our room with our 6 month old because I live with my in-laws. So if you share a room try to ignore him, unless he cries, then you're stuck with playing with him. Now if he's in his own room, just let him cry. It'll take a few days but he'll eventually sleep through the night. Just hang in there, eventually he'll get out of the playing in the middle of the night mood and he'll sleep at night.

Don't cut out any naps. The better rested your child is, the more he will sleep at night (sleep begets sleep). the book "Healthy sleep habits, happy baby" by Dr. Marc Weisblut is fabulous. A baby of that age should be getting a nap about after 2 hours of activity. So once he has been awake for about an hour to 90 mins, look for the signs of tiredness and then try to put down. Naps less than 30 mins dont count and naps in the car/stroller are not so restorative. so try to get him to nap in a nice quiet spot, dark and with as little disturbance as possible. In the middle of the night, I would try to leave him and let him learn to fall back to sleep. This will take a few nights, maybe even a week but once done is such a relief. My pediatrician told me that my baby at that age shouldn't be hungry in the middle of the night and so not to feed as if I continued, it was really her wanting some attention rather than her needing to eat. So i toughed it out and sure enough she was soon sleeping like an angel. Every now and then she wakes in the night and cries for a few seconds and then she falls back to sleep. Good luck. It is hard but well worth the investment of perhaps a week of misery to get to the joys of rest for all the family.

Hello - I read sleep books by Weissbluth, Mindell and Ferber. All sleep experts agree "sleep begets sleep". The better they sleep during the day (naps), then the better they sleep at night. Maintain all naps. Some babies (like mine) take many short naps and some take a few long ones - you can't change that now. I suggest going out today and getting Jodi Mindell's book - Sleeping thru the night - it is at most libraries. It will take a couple days to read but worked for my baby who is 6 months old.

Your son is just the right age to begin the 5min-10-min-15min system for becoming self-soothing. It may seem harsh, and if you find it difficult to listen to him cry, turn the monitor way down.Here's how it works, next nap time just lay him down on his back in his crib matter of factly, don't linger to see if he'll need you.Set a timer for 5min and let him cry. When it rings, pop your head in the door, don't talk, don't make noise, assume he is okay.Now, back to the other room and set the timer for 10 min. He will probably fall asleep during this time. If not, pop in your head, same as before and then set the timer for 15 min.If he doesn't fall asleep before it rings, then you can pick him up. But do try this approach again and again, each time he'll get closer to self-soothing. In the middle of the night, use a hall light, when he wakes up do not stimulate his senses, that only wakes him up more. If you smell a messy diaper change him silently in his crib, no talking, no games. He is to discover that waking up at night is boring, there is nothing going on, he might as well sleep. Proceed with the 5-10-15 min approach. It's difficult to ignore that strong feeling that you can soothe him, but, hey, you and a lot of mothers have found out, "nothing seems to work". I have a home day care and this approach has worked 95% of the time.When he gets sick, and you are up with him at night, you will probably have to listen to some crying again when he gets better but he'll soon go back to falling asleep by himself! He'll be happier and healthier and you will gain some control of your world and some much needed breaks for your own rest. M. C

Dear C. R,
I just wanted to remind you that newborn's behavior patterns constantly change. I know you thought youwere well on your way with the baby sleeping consistently in that pattern (which was very comfortable to you)but sleeping patterns do change. What you are experincing now will change too. You must learn to "Go With The Flow". You must however get your rest. So when the baby sleeps try to get some sleep too!
J. M

Try weissbluth's book---healthy sleep habit, happy baby. Sleep begets sleep. focus on naps and the nighttime sleep will follow.

I have a cheatsheet if your interested....you can email me.

Healthy sleep habits happy child is a good book for understanding the sleep needs of a child/infant. I encourage you to read the second edition, but just to get an understanding of the sleep needs - skip the part about crying it out :)

Hi C.,

My little 'huggie bear' is the same way (almost)... 3 am, she's looking up at me with big bright eyes, happy as can be, talking to me - I want so badly to interact with her, but I know that nightime stimulation should be kept to a minimum,... i dont even change a diaper unless she is soaked, or has pooped...she is typically up for about 1- 1.5 hours...

I will usually lay her back down, and let her talk a bit, and when she starts crying i will go in and try rocking her again for a few minutes... sometimes just the fussing for a few minutes is enough to make her tired and accept her pacifier and be wrapped up for sleep again. But i always lay her back down somewhat awake - she needs to learn to get herself to sleep.

they also say that the better they sleep during the day, the better night time sleep will be.

my only additional advice for you... don't start anything you're not willing to keep up (laying with him, bringing him into bed with you, etc.)- i know we get desperate as moms to just get by and get some sleep... my trick for that... Lo-Carb Monster Energy drink - LOL! seriously - i would be a zombie without that dose of caffeine :) and I get really crabby on little sleep... between the Monster and the Paxil I take, I'm managing :)

I dont know if I've helped at all with your dilemma, maybe some other moms can give you tips on changing his crazy schedule. i know there are some good books out there, but i've never read any, and honestly haven't had too much trouble in this department, knock on wood! (knock knock)

Good luck!

I know you will likely get a ton of advice that will be the opposite of what I am about to say.... I will tell you that I lived through the same thing! My story, my husband left me when our son was 3 months old. (He has not seen my son since) I had to go back to work, I need my sleep! My son was almost the same as you have described your little one. So, I brought my son to bed with me! It has NOT created a spoiled, shy, or dependant child. My son is the opposite, he is extremely secure and safe in the world. He can and will sleep just about anywhere,with or with out mom. (He is now 5!) The most important thing is that you are well rested, if not, then you are not at the top of your parenting! All of this to say, it is a season, your little one is still very little! And... you will sleep again, it just may not be for a while!! :) I promise no matter what you decided to do, you both will grow past this stage! I remember thinking, this will never end... I even thought I was going crazy!

Good luck,
C.

Hi C.:
I don't claim to be any expert, but I have had a lot of experience,with one child of my own (now 19 ) & 13 years of home daycare.
When your son wakes up, does he fuss or just stay awake?
Because, if no fussing, then there is no harm in leaving him alone.
If he knows that you know he is awake - he will try to get your attention.
Every baby needs to learn how to fall asleep, & if he is not napping very much, there is not anymore you can do.
He should eventually just fall back asleep on his own.
Hope this helps - I remember how tired I was at that stage,
& I used to be up for hours, because I would rock & get up with my son.
Around 6 mo's, I couldn't stand the exhaustion anymore-
& I put him in bed, & eventally after a little crying- he learned to fall asleep on his own.

Good Luck & Hang in There!

D. G. Downers Grove, ILL>