Help with Sleeping

Updated on March 26, 2008
J.W. asks from Roanoke, TX
11 answers

My daughter is almost 11 months and only takes a 1-1 1/2 hour nap during the day, she usually goes to sleep at 7pm and will sleep through the night until 7am. Recently, we have been having trouble with her night time sleeping habits. She will go down around 7-7:30pm and wake up an hour later ready to play. I have read babywise and have followed it but she is not responding to it all. She cries and screams continually. We have tried patting her back, giving her more bottle, rocking her and just letting her play until 9-10pm. My husband and I are struggling what to do. Any advice????

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J.H.

answers from Amarillo on

Unless she get extra cranky at 7, try to keep her up a little later, and play something that won't stimulate her, or read a story or sing to her, but just make the bed time a little later if possible.

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B.P.

answers from Dallas on

If it were me, I would keep her up til 830p at least and see if it helps. Make sure you wear her out completely during the day, if at all possible. I read a quote about children the other day, and having raised 2 kids, I agree... "No matter what it is - good or bad - it's just a phase."

Good luck!

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H.S.

answers from Dallas on

My son did the same thing!!! He was always a good sleeper until he was around a yr old and he did the same thing. I would put him down around 8 and an hour later he was up and ready to go. At his 12 mth. well visit, I mentioned it to the Dr. and she said it is very common and many kids go through this. She didn't really recommend much, but she reassured me that it was only a phase. Sure enough, it was; it lasted for a couple of mths. but my son who is now 16 mths. old, is back on track! But, I definitely feel your pain! Good luck!!!

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B.B.

answers from Dallas on

What time of the day does she take a nap? Try laying her down around 12:30 0r 1:00 and sleep no longer then 3:00pm then she will be ready for bed and put her to bed at 800 instead of 730. and see if that would work. If she wakes up do not get her out of bed tell her that it is night time and walk out. she may fuss for awhile but eventually she will know that you are going to come get her and go back to sleep. Do this everynight and then in about 3 weeks she will wont up again.

B.

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M.D.

answers from Dallas on

I've read BabyWise too. Our daughter did not respond well to it either. All it did was make me and her mad. It works really well for some moms, not so much for others.

When I read that your daughter's waking up an hour after going to bed, I thought right away that she may be taking a REALLY late nap. She may actually be taking 2 naps, it's just that the last one is so late.

You could try 1 of 2 things: Try putting her down earlier for her first nap so that she can take a second in the afternoon instead of 7 p.m.

Another option is to do what another mom said and keep her up longer so that she'll cut out her 7 p.m. nap, allowing her to sleep through once she's put down for the night.

If I were in your situation, I would try to aim for 2 naps a day. My daughter is 10.5 months and takes 2 naps - one in the late morning, another at around 2 or 3. Then she goes to bad at 7:30, sometimes 8.

Good luck!

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T.L.

answers from Dallas on

Try not to put her to bed so early.

Also, the bedtime bath and lotion worked wonders for one of my children. Made them calm and sleep through the night.

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J.M.

answers from Dallas on

J.,

I am a mom to 5 kids.....the oldest is 7 and the youngest is 2 year old. My husband and I have facilitated parent education courses for several years through our church. IT is hard to give advice without answers to about 25 questions I would love to ask BUT from what you state here, two things come to mind.

The first is that the child is going through a stage that mom and dad need to direct. At 11 months, this can very much be a disobedience issue. Mom and Dad say sleep and child says, "no". You will need to make sure that child does not win the battle. If you have more questions on discipline for an 11 month old, I would be free to answer. Bottom line is that the child's bedtime is dictated by you and if the she wakes up during the night, she needs to stay in bed and go back to sleep.

Also, I know in the past when we had some night sleep issues the first question my husband and I would ask ourselves is "Are we spending enough time together in front of the children?" When kids have the tangible picture of mom and dad loving each other, any low-level anxiety created by even the smallest amount of uncertainty, subsides. Mom and Dad are their whole world. If mom and dad are not okay, or they sense they are not for any reason, the child can wake up from low-level anxienty in night AND/OR do things to try to draw mom and dad together to solve. At least you are together, tangibly in front of them trying to solve a problem.

If you think that may be an issue. A really good way to counter it is called " couch time". This does not have to be on the couch, but it is time, everyday, when dad comes home from work, that mom and dad sit and talk to one another and spend time uninterupted by kids BUT in front of them. If child sees dad putting mom first (even if there is resistance at first they will soon warm up to it) then she will become more confident. We would set up a play station in the same room to put our child on and they had to stay there and play but we would sit right in front of the child for 30 minutes talking and hugging and totally focused on one another. This remedied not only sleep issues but any other behaviors that had surfaced that were out of the ordinary.

Hope it helps.

J.

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M.J.

answers from Abilene on

My daughter has always struggled to go to sleep for about anhour every single night.Even now although she is nearly age 9. As difficult as it was I had to quit letting her nap because all that did was create worse sleep fighting at night time.When she was about 2 or 2 and a half I remember her sceaming from 9pm until midnight not wanting to sleep but with professional advice,from my doctor,I put a gate on her door so she couldn't get out and she finally fell asleep on the floor. It was the worst feeling to trap her in her room but she refused to stay in the bed and rest!!
Anyhow,I know your daughter is alot younger and she needs you more right now so I just wish you the best of luck!
As a parent of an award winning sleep fighter believe me I know it is a very tough battle!! SO I really do wish you all the best for your child and I hope for your sake she will out-
grow this bad habit soon!

--M. (____@____.com)

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J.B.

answers from Amarillo on

J.~
Although I don't have any advise, I can tell you how my situation is with my son. He takes 3 naps a day. He takes his first one from 9:30-11/11:30, the second from 1:30-3/3:30 and the last from 7-8:30/9. He then wakes up, we have bath time, playtime, a glass of milk, then off to bed around 9:30. He sleeps from then until we get him up around 7:20 in the morning M-F and whenever he wants to wake up on the weekends.

Like the other posters have said, maybe she just thinks that she's taken a nap since when she woke up it was light outside?

~J.

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K.M.

answers from Dallas on

Hi J.,

I have to agree with the other post. Keep her up until 8 or 9 even. Maybe she's being thrown off by daylight savings and is waking up around 8pm when it's still light out thinking she just took a nap. Try putting her down when it's completely dark outside.

Good luck to you!

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D.M.

answers from Dallas on

I get a weekly email from Parentcenter.com and Babycenter.com. I have an 11-month-old, too. In an email from one or the other about two weeks ago, it warned me to be aware that sleeping patterns would most likely change this month due to the fact that babies this age are really aware and exploring their world. All this "excitement" of learning new things keeps them from wanting to sleep because they are so "hyped" about exploring. It will pass soon. I am experiencing the same thing, too. This baby is my second one. My oldest is now seven, so I can't remember what I did with her. I am just going with the flow, knowing that it will soon rememdy itself. MAINLY, I just stick to our set bed-time, and use the same routine to put her to bed. She ususally goes right to sleep, but if she doesn't I let her cry for a few minutes & that usually does the trick. If the crying continues and gets worse, then I check on her...it's usually poop. Then, when she wakes in the middle of the night, I give her pacifier back to her, and I make sure that she has her "lovey," but I don't get her out of bed unless the waking issue is due to a bad diaper (which is unusual, but sometimes happens). Sometimes at this age it is a power struggle. Baby is testing how to win her/his way. Be disciplined and stick to a routine with repetition. Talk to your spouse and decide what your parental boundaries are for this aged child (as he/she grows you will have to set new boundaries) and what you must stick with...then support each other.

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