HELP With My 13 Year Old

I like The Five Love Languages for Teens.

It's really hard when it seems like you spend all your time being "the hammer." This book explains that there are basically five love languages and everyone speaks one more dominantly than the other. For instance, mine is quality time. When my kids spend time with me or my husband spends time with me I feel loved. I found it very helpful because it helped me figure out the best way to express my love to my kids so that they understood it. That way, even though I had to be the hammer alot, I also was making sure I was getting the good stuff into them, too. It smoothed things out for us.

I agree with Lisa C. All of the '5 love languages' books are very insightful. I also suggest "The Power of Positive Parenting." The author's last name is Latham.
Good luck. This is a difficult time for teen girls. (And their moms.) :)

Is she involved in any activity outside of spending time with you. That might help if she is able to get out and do something without feeling "responsible" or "adult" - if that makes sense. I would assume being single, she feels pressure to be big girl versus teenager, so double resentment. Just a guess.

Love and Logic by Jim Fay and Foster Cline
I read the original books. Now they have a whole series, and there are courses. I took the course twice. It was well worth it.

http://www.loveandlogic.com/ecom/c-79-featured-selections...

Don't have any book suggestions, but this is my advice...
Listen way more than you talk. Be consistent. Don't be afraid to say "No" because she will get mad. Be her mom, not her "friend". Keep the lines of communication open (I know, hard to do when they have their ipods in their ears and everything you say gets an eyeroll :) Hug her at least once a day...they still need it and want it even though they pretend not to. Good luck!