Help with 2.5 Yo Waking During Night

Updated on May 28, 2008
D.L. asks from Kensington, MD
5 answers

Hello,

My request is not for myself, but for a friend of mine, a single mom to (by choice) 2.5 year old girl/girl twins. Her girls have never been great sleepers and even now at 2.5 years old, they still wake several times during the night. (They also don't nap every day...they just do NOT lie down and go to sleep.) It used to be when their paci's feel out of their mouths while sleeping, but those were taken away about a month or so ago, without too much drama. Now, one of the twins (both girls) still wakes up about 4 times a night and calling/crying for her mom. Based on the information I've gathered from my friend, it seems her one girl doesn't seem to be very good with the self soothing. It requires her mom to come in to settle her down again. The most recent suggestions I've made is to put in a night-light (the bedroom is very dark at night) and to get a new white noise maker. She had one, but it broke or something. I've suggested maybe the CIO option, but her girls have a tendency toward hysteria and she's afraid doing the CIO thing will wake up her other daughter....but that might be necessary to have a couple rough nights with them both to get them both to sleep through the neight? I don't know.

I was hoping some of you other moms may have experience with helping your toddlers to learn how to self soothe...at this age. We'd love to hear your suggestions about things that have worked for you.

Thanks in advance.

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.H.

answers from Washington DC on

Wow, here you have twins who have been raised together from the womb, and one is a good sleeper and one is not. This just proves my theory that some kids are good sleepers and some are not.

I myself have a not-good sleeper. She's also 2.5. The other responses seem too harsh to me. Parenting is unfortunately a 24/7 job. I believe that kids need to be parented at night, too.

That said, here is what we do with my daughter. She gets a bath, teeth brushed, story or two read, and then we turn out the lights and rock her until she goes to sleep. When she wakes at night, we either lay back down with her or allow her into our bed. This feels right to me. We all get more sleep and there is no struggling.

The problem with methods is that kids are not robots. They are emotional beings with unique minds and needs. I would encourage your friend to first make sure that there isn't some physical reason for her daughter's waking: molars, stomach ache, food or airborne allergies, etc. Then she should try to address any emotional issues. Is she missing her father? Has she seen something on t.v. or in real life that scared her? If she's at daycare all day, maybe she needs to be close to mom at night.

Just some suggestions. I know it's frustrating, but I believe that if we meet our kids' nighttime needs now, they will grow up to be better adjusted and better sleepers overall.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

Dear D.,

I am a Doctor of Oriental Medicine, and I work with mothers and children. There are several reasons why children wake during the night, and it is not always emotional as many seem to think. Often it is related to energetic imbalances that can be easily corrected. An example is that a child's digestive system is really not fully developed until they are about 10 years old, and many early childhood probelms can be traced back to problems with the digestive system. You might consider seeing someone who practices Traditional Chinese Medicine and who sees Pediatric patients to help you with this problem. The clinic where i practice has a website www.mcim.org. You can find an article that I've written there entitled "Oriental Medicine for Your Little Ones". This may be a starting point, and then explore this further by reading about the benefits of Chinese Medicine for children. Hope this was helpful.

Sincerely,
S. Martin OMD, L.Ac.,RN

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Insomnia, The baby has insominia. Check with your doctor.also check for ADHA kids have that,have insomnia as well.I used to have to ride my baby in a car or push his stroller at night around the block a few times before he would fall asleep. When i went to the doctors, He looked at me crazy when i told him he wouldnt sleep. I knew it wasnt normal the hours he kept and the age he was at the time. I have 6 kids so i know it wasnt right.Dont let them doctors BLOW U OFF either.

D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi D.,

Seems like your friend needs some parenting classes and some discipline in her routine.

Old Dominion Child Study Center has resource information for Positive Parenting.

###-###-#### or www.dl.odu/101s

Any City's Department of Social Services.

Any City's Department of Public Health.

Young Children Priority One: ###-###-#### or www.kidspriorityone.org

Hope this helps. Good Luck. D.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.H.

answers from Norfolk on

I think you need to go back to the basics. Get things set up for the evening earlier than normal. Start getting things ready for bed at about 6:30pm. Take bathes, read stories brush teeth all that. Than lay down. My suggestion is to drop everything else like white noise, music or what not. Just lay them down and leave. At this age you shouldn't have to come back. BUT i understand how loud older kids can get but i would wait until she comes out. Than take her back in and lay her down. Do this repeatedly. I know with my daughter i would rock her each evening and sing a simple long like rock a by baby. TWO TIMES. that was the rule, only two times. You might have to move the other child out for a few nights to get the troubled one settled and set in her routine. All that really has to happen is you need to focus on a routine and stick to it. At this age they understand what the rules are. Only two books, two songs and than tuck in and lights out. If you waver from it ONE time they know there is some room for wiggle and they will force the issue.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions