HELP! Parent That Does Not Feed a 9 Mo. Old

Perhaps mention you think she may be going through a growth spurt because she is so hungry. Ask that he feed her prior to bed - at least formula. Also if he says she wakes up and stays up mention that she is probably growing and needs a bottle.

You may want to ask if he can feed her a bottle prior to coming because things are hectic first thing in the morning and it would help.

Poor thing is probably hungry - sounds like someone just needs to inform him. Good luck.

Hey A.,

Wow that's kind of a tough situation! I don't know why any parent would not feed there child on a regular basis, sounds like they are just lazy, possibly confused? I am a first time mother and it sounds like this may be his first as well, there are some really good websites for feeding guidelines. I wasn't crazy about the Gerber.com site but I really like the Earths best products, here is the website;
http://www.earthsbest.com/baby_nutrition/feeding_schedule...
It really helped me alot, also talking to my Doctor to establish a rutine. (she also reccomended more solids than the website said to give) I have a 6 month old, and we make sure to give her a good dinner and a before bed bottle. As soon as she wakes up in the morning (really wakes up- not tossing) we give her a bottle along with some oatmeal or cereal, they always say for adults that breakfast is so important, I would assume the same for baby. I just look at it as giving my Daughter the best start for the day. She also has a bottle about every 4 hours of her waking day and stage two foods 3 times a day, along with a sippy cup! (I know some people think this is a lot, but this is what her Dr. and I have discussed and agree on)
Maybe you could just play dumb and say wow she seems awful hungry- maybe a growth spurt? Have your tried feeding her more just to see??? Maybe he will try and give her more.
Who knows maybe there are other parents out there confused about feeding and your question with other Mothers answers will help them out too!

Good luck!
A.

Work up the courage to bring these matters up to your friend. It need not be done with hostility or anger. He's a new dad: he can't be expected to know everything about babies. Be as gentle and tactful as you can. It sounds like he's truly doing the best he can. But your silence now may affect that child's future. Maybe you can offer to attend a doctor's appointment with him to help communicate with the doctor. If I were you, I'd also refer him to Mamasource! Sounds like he's both mom and dad to his child. If he truly loves his child as you have observed, he will appreciate the support and the caring concern you have for his baby girl.

Good luck!

Wish there were some way to get the pediatrician to talk to him. Men listen to doctors pretty well. I think he is just not empathizing with her very well, which I find common in dads. I guess I'm wondering where the mother is at this young age. Would he read a flyer or something if you gave it to him? You're definitely right. God bless you for doing this for these children, A.!

Talking to him sweetly about what his baby must be feeling/thinking may help, maybe putting a little humor into it.

The developmental issues may work out or there may indeed be a delay but I don't think you can do anything about it. In time, it will become evident. I'd stimulate her and try to get her moving on the floor while you have her. Another thing is that the school system can evaluate her for prevention services if he decides to contact them.

Wow, this is a very sad situation, i feel very sorry for that baby. Thank god she has you for the majority of the day. I would let the father know that you think he needs to feed her more in the evening, definatly another bottle before bed, and she'll probably sleep better at night. I would not sound negative or accusatory, just like your making a suggestion. Let him know that she's famished when she gets to you. As for the motor skills, she should be crawling by 9 months. and definatly sitting up. If he takes her to the pediatrician regularly and they don't see it as a problem, i wouldn't worry, some babies are just slower to develop. Good Luck!

I think you establish some rules regarding feedings. Some daycare providers provide breakfast, others do not. If she is leaving at 5:30, she should be getting dinner at home and then a bottle about an hour before bed. When my daughter was that age we would give her a bottle when she work up and then they would feed her cereal and fruit at daycare, about an hour later. She would not drink her bottle if we did breakfast at the same time.

I would suggest that she needs a bottle an hour or so before bed and then a bottle when she wakes up (not at 4am, but she may be waking up at 4 b/c she is hungry) and then you will feed her cereal/fruit at your house.

Developmently, I would let the Dr. handle this. My son did not move until he was 14 mos. He was fine. I was concerned and spoke to the Dr. about it...but he did eventually move and was walking at 16 mos, which is still considered normal. Crawling is not a developmental step.

If you are very concerned, I would suggest to him that some of the other kids that age are doing x, y and z, and maybe he could ask the Dr. what you could be doing during hte day to encourage her to take said actions.

You would like a very caring person, good luck.