Hi ladies, my son goes to sleep between 8-8:30. He is in daycare for most of the week and we feel that he needs a good 10-11 hours of sleep. As an infant and a young toddler he slept through the night unless he was sick. When he was sick we often brought him to bed with us because he was up so frequently. Once he was better he would go back to his crib with no prolems.
Lately he had a string of ear infections that left him miserable and he often slept with us 1/2 of the night; he would usually come to bed with us anywhere between 12-3am. Well he got tubes in his ears and all seemed to be going well, but now he is up to his old tricks and we know he is not sick.
We are at are witts end, because he wakes us up in the middle of the night. If we ignore his crying it get's so bad that he makes himself sick and he is too big to bring in bed with us all the time. We don't know what to do anymore...please help us with any advise or tips you have. We need a (parent's version)of a good night sleep.
p.s. we have been going for walks after dinner to use up some of the excess energy he has and thought that might help, but it hasn't.
Thank you in advance for your responses!
Thank you so much for all of your suggestions! We have been preparing him for bed ahead of time by telling him that we will not pick him up or bring him into our bed if he wakes up and that he is uppose to sleep in his own bed. It seems to work so far becasue for the past two nights he hasn't woke up in middle of the night! We'll also be purchasing a toddler bed in the next couple of weeks.
Thanks Again!
M.
Hi M.,
I can absolutely guarantee you this O. thing: Nice weather is coming! haha You will be able to tire him out more in a week or two! lol
I think you're doing the right thing by going in and comforting him every 10 minutes or so, but don't pick him up and keep the talking to a mimimum--no conversations, just "time to sleep", etc. Sounds like he just needs to get back into his little bed groove!
Good luck!
p.s. I love Oakmont!
does your son nap in the day care?
my son would sleep walk (his dad did it when he was young) and would we would have miserable nights...so i tried a bunch of different things, but i figured it out that when he had a nap during the day was when he was up during the night, so we quit the naps cold turkey and he hasnt slept walked since (knock on wood)
maybe no naps would make him, be so tired at night that he wouldnt want to get up?
You don't mention if he naps during the day or not...may want to think if its time to move to 'quiet time' rather than a full blown nap.
Our daughter takes quiet time rather than a nap because she wouldn't go to sleep until 1am with a nap. She konks out (after days of playground and lots of running around the house) around 8:30pm and stays asleep all night.
As far as staying out of your bed, loving but firm bedtime talk. No cuddling or anything that would make it fun and therefore rewarding for him to perk up when the stars are out.
Good luck with that...we're still at the 'stay in your own bed' phase with our 32 month old girl. **Yawn!!**
That is a tough one as we all loose sleep, a casualty of parenthood. What you don't want is a pattern. That is what needs to break.
For us, we have 3 kids, 5,3 and 2. Two boys and 1 girl. If they get up, we go to thier bed. Comfort them, then put them down and leave (lights off, night light on). They may get up again but if you keep doing the same thing (comfort then leave staying no more then 5 min or so. They get tired, know you will be leaving and start breaking the habit on thier own. In the end it is the comfort they crave, and one on one time with you. But they have to learn that bedtime is bedtime not Mommy or Daddy time.
Sometimes crying will happen, but it won't hurt them or scare them mentally. Lack of sleep however hurts everyone. Especailly if you have a busy day to day schedule.
Sometimes enticing them with special one on one days or going over the next days events gets them psyched to go to sleep so they can do the fun stuff the next day.
Also, not sure if you are artsy but we paited murals in each of our kids rooms so they love thier room. Each room is different so they have thier own "space".
Good luck, lack of sleep is one of the hardest things!
Try this book "sleepless in America" by mary sheedy kurcinka. It is fantastic and is helping but my three rowdy children to bed. Only one is a good sleeper (I have four altogther). It is great.
Hello, I am writing from Spain, so please forgive my English. I give you a tip from my sister in-law(it worked for her): Give your son loads and loads of love and tenderness … in excess!!! Literary. Take some time with your husband when your son comes to bed,pretend that you sleep and hugh your kid sooooo much until he feels uncomfortable, make only little room for him so can barely move, move a lot or even snore; and he will prefer the tranquility of his own bed. Try this for a couple of nights. Good luck!
I am taking a parenting class called Love & Logic. This is their idea for what your child is going thru. They say that you let the child know ahead of time that he is welcome in your bedroom if he wakes in the middle of the night BUT sleeping IN your bed is not an option. So you can set up a little area in your room on the floor where he is allowed to go if he wakes up and comes in. You can put a pillow and sleeping bag down or whatever just as long as he knows YOUR bed is YOUR bed and HIS bed is HIS. This way your son has the option of choosing where he wants to sleep if he wakes up and you are not the bad guy. He feels he is in control. Then you can get a good night's sleep. I hope this helps
Hi M.,
I know there are a ton of books out there that all recommend different methods to try for sleeping through the night, but one that I have found incredibly helpful with tips on just about everything including sleeping through the night from infancy through toddlerhood is called Secrets of the Baby Whisperer - there are a couple of different books in the series - I read them all and they are great. I hope you find a solution that works!
Is his crib convertible to a toddler bed? The change may break the cycle he is in now. We did this for my son at his age and put a gate on his bedroom door. He would wake up all the time at night and fuss - seem agitated. Think it was that he was "contained". When he awoke we just went into his room put him back in his "big boy bed", tucked him in and left. We were consistent and did not bring him into our room and he stayed in his bed pretty quickly. There were some nightw where we found him on the floor sleeping but we did not make a big deal about it. Otherwise if you still want him in the crib, try playing music, a night light, very small sippy with water in his crib...
Dr Ferber has a great technique that worked for me. It seems a little harsh, but it does work. You should read his book if you are interested. When your son gets up, you firmly take him back to his bed and place him in it, with very little talking. If he gets out again the technique involves closing your son's door for a few seconds. It will be dark and a little frightening. When you open the door, you say, "Do you want your door open? Then get back in bed." Every time he gets out of bed, you close it a little longer, and he quickly gets the idea. I hope you don't think I am a mean mommy, but my son once came in our room 17 times in one night! He also did the throwing up thing if we didn't go. It was one of the roughest times for me and my husband. We never fight, but we were both sleep deprived and at our wit's end and we fought like cats and dogs over this! (My husband wanted to bring him in bed, and I did not.) Try the Ferber book, it is amazing. I highly recommend it! Good luck!
