My step son's mom took him (possibly camping?? yes, in 30 degree weather) without our consent. According to the child support papers starting on Dec. 26th at noon, he is to be in our custody. She knew this and we spoke to her about it.. but she decided to just leave. My husband arrived at her house at noon to pick up his son and she was not there. She turned off her phone to avoid us.
The police are now involved and we are filing a complaint. But does anyone know what possible offense she could be facing? I know that after 24 hours it is considered kidnapping. Unfortunately, she is the custodial parent but we have rights too and we are going BY THE PAPERS.
We have the texts confirming that she stated that we could pick him up at her house at noon today. However, this morning she said he wanted to go camping with them and that we could get him Monday. Which we refused... and now they both are MIA.
Any ideas on what we should do? Or how much trouble she can really get into?
1. Of course I would never trash talk her to my step son or in front of him... I came from a civil divorced family and
I was taught how to behave correctly
2. i'm a kindergarten teacher (nd have bveen for 5 yers now)... I know how to act properly and contain my emotions.. however, she does not. She is the one who explodes in front of her child and bad talks us in front of him.. and WE (my husband, me, and our son together) are the RIGHT family for him. What we do for him is out of love not to get back at her.
3. Taing a 3 yr old camping in 30 degree weather to go off roading is unfit in my opinion.. esp when she climed he was sick two days prior
4. This is her first major offense but yes she has committed others and we've documented them
5. He wants to live with us... we provide a a wonderful home for him
6. This is her 3rd place to live and who knows wht number of live in boyfriend she is on since he has been born.. I know she has lived with atleast 3 guys
Thanks to everyone's advice. We have been keeping records of all of the times we ask for him and she just flat out denies it. We have texts stating that she did say that we couold pick him up at her house on 12/26 at noon nd then two days later she changed her mind. My step son WANTS to live with my husband and I and CRIES every time we hve to drop him off. She isn't necessarily the worst mom in the world but she cannot and will not ever be able to provide for him what we have.
She has had several different "serious" boyfriends that she has lived with since he has been born. And this is not the first time she has gone against what the papers stated (ie: not letting us have him on Thanksgiving).
She is a bitter angry person who uses her child against my husband bc she LOVES control.
But we will be taking her to court as soon as we have enoujgh against her.
this happened to my husband as well, but it was in Ohio and all the mom got was a slap on the wrist. She also managed to tangle the mess up all sorts legal proceedings so that it bled us dry financially.
Obviously, you need to hire a lawyer and file contempt charges. family lawyers are familiar with this situation and can advise you further...
If you decide to pursue it, call Connie Langston, an attorney in Fort Worth. She is excellent and has been recommended to me for a similar situation by 3 of my friends. Good luck!
Not sure if you are in Dallas courts or elsewhere but most courts do frown upon this. It is a contempt of court ruling and visitation interference. She could loose her custodial parent rights by behaving this way.
You do have to show the documentation that it was not agreed for her to take him camping...because otherwise it is one parents word against another. You should follow through...it is not just about punishing the other parent as stated in another post. It is about creating alienation in the child against the other parent. The mother has crossed the line and is creating a division in the dad & childs time together. Probably not a lot that can be done until Monday other than file the appropriate police records & court papers...but the documentation is woth it. Filing the kidnapping charges is also another step to show that she did not try to work out a solution and communicate with you or your husband in the interim.
Document, document document. Keep records of every time she breaks the court ordered "rules". All you can do is keep records of everything until there is an established pattern of behaviour. Then, you can consult your attorney and move on from there. If you do nothing, she will assume that she can continue to do as she pleases. Just keep your emotions and anger in check in front of the child. Don't make him feel as has done anything wrong and do not ever talk badly about her in front of him. Do not try to retaliate with similar behaviour, or your husband will also be in violation. If you are already working with an attorney, I would definitely keep him/her apprised of the situation. Good luck!
it's called custodial interference ...call the cops
kidnapping, contempt of court, just for starters
From personal experience... Depending on the courts she will probably just get a slap on the hand and someone say "you can't do that." Unfortunately since she IS the custodial parent and she IS the mother the courts will go easy on her. Our judicial system still seams to think the Mother is the best parent for the job.
If this does go beyond a police report: Keep copies of EVERYTHING. You will need a very strong case to prove her unfit as a parent if you seek to change custody. Sorry but camping in the winter will not work in your favor. There is absolutely nothing wrong with camping in 30 degree weather if one is properly outfitted for it. The Girl Scouts actually offer a badge for it!
Best of luck!
D.
SAHM of two: 19(by choice since he was 7yrs old) and 6(by birth). Baker/Owner of LittleSnowflakes. Married to my best friend for almost 13 years.
lots it is concidered kidkanpping as i understand it and am fairly certain because otherwise the police would not be around. police do not get involved in mere custody battles. she is also in violation of a court order which is actionable on its own
