HELP!! I'm Going Crazy!!

M.,

I really believe that you need to just stop feeding him at! He should be fine eating three meals a day and a few bottles throughout the day and then one shortly before he sleeps. Then you have to train him to sleep by not getting him when he wakes up at night. Just let him fuss. Sounds cruel but it will be harder for you then him. This worked for my daughter. Eventually after a few days she would just sleep through the night!

Good luck,

B.

read "HEALTHY SLEEP HABITS, HAPPY CHILD". Best book ever and helped me understand and solve some of the things I was doing without knowing it.

Hi M.,

You may not want to hear this, but I think the only thing that works is letting them cry it out!! We did it with our son around 5 or 6 months b/c he was wanting to nurse every two hours and I thought I was going to die!! By that age, they do not need to eat through the night - they "should" be able to go at least 8 hours without feeding - and feeding them more does not make them sleep better ( I tried that theory)...

It may take a week or even two for your baby to get it down, and it will be the hardest thing you have ever done, but if you don't let your child learn to soothe himself back to sleep now, he will have a hard time later on.

I am sure lots of moms disagree with me, but this is the only thing that worked for our family. Like I said, it is so hard - it breaks your heart as a mother to hear your baby crying for so long night after night, but remember - he is okay - he is just trying to get your attention (of course make sure everything is okay - he doesn't have a poopy diaper, he is comfy in his crib, his room is not too hot or cold, otherwise he is okay)..

let me know what you do and GOOD LUCK! Sleep deprivation is the hardest thing...

Your son is pobably not hungry, he just needs to suck. Kids at his age can go at least 6 hours before they need to eat again.
I would try to wean the bottle out of the night all together. Give him a bath at bedtime And rock him to sleep. Make sure he has AT LEAST 6 to eight ounces in his tummy before you lay him in his crib. If he waked up at night you can rock him again but try not to give him a bottle. If he likes a pacifier give him that, or if you have to let him suck for a minute to calm him that is fine, but try to get him to fall asleep by rocking. Then every night put him to bed more awake each time. This is what I did with my twins after learning with my 2 yr old by doing it the wrong way. Good Luck

Hi M.,
Have you tried putting some cereal in his bottle? Add just a little to thicken it up a bit, but can still come out and he won't really notice the difference. Have you also tried just letting him cry it out? I know that is hard, but it should get better after 3-4 days. He is old enough to be able to go longer than 3 hours without a bottle. If you go to him at night, don't pick him up, just rub his tummy or comfort him some other way for a few minutes and then leave. If he keeps crying, let him cry for 5 minutes and go back in. Each time letting more time lapse before you go to him. The first couple of days will be rough, but it will get better. He needs to learn how to comfort himself and fall asleep without you or the bottle. Hope this helps, these things seemed to work for me and my friends. Good luck!

Dear M. W,
try adding cereal to the formula at bedtime. I did with both of my kids and it made them fuller. By the time my kids were 2 months they slept through the night. See if that helps. M. P

if he's 9 months old he can have other things i think besides just cereal. Try him on some other baby foods , maybe something that might help fill him up. Or other kinds of cereals, they have different flavors. Just be careful to remember which ones you try in case he has an allergic reaction so you'll know which caused it. My kids loved bananas, and they always liked the cereals with fruit added in them for flavor, and not the plain cereals.

Hi M.:

I assume when you say you've tried cereal, you meal separately. If so, try putting cereal in his bottle at night. If I don't do this, my 11 mo. old daughter will not sleep through the night either. And if you have trouble with the plain cereal, try using one with fruit mixed in it. I also find that if I give her a warmer bottle (warmer than usual) at nighttime, she seems to sleep a bit better. Just some suggestions; hopefully they help.
H.

YESSSS!!!! I'm going through the same thing! NOTHING is working for me! I've tried cereal in a bottle... he still wakes up. I've tried not giving him a bottle and just rocking or patting him back to sleep but he'll wake up after an hour again. I've tried the pacifier but he just spits it out. AND I've tried letting him cry it out. I did this a few nights and HE'S A SCREAMER! He WILL NOT sooth himself and go back to sleep! My 3 yr old sleeps in the same room with him and she'll wake up crying because of him! I tried it during nap time too but he WOULDN'T stop crying. I'm talking HOURS here. I went in every 5 minutes or so but nothing helped. He wants me to hold him ALL the time. My husband just left for a deployment so I know he's a little attatched but I CANNOT handle this any more. My girl slept through the night at 4 months, he's 7 months now. I need help too... let me knw what works for you please. Sorry I'm no help but I just wanted to let you know I'm sleepy too! :(

I can't offer any help, but just wanted to let you know I am going through the same thing. I have a 4 year old, and 19 month old, and a 4 month old. The littlest one was sleeping through the night til about a week ago. Last night he was up every 2 hours, and I have to work today! I finally just got up at 4am. When he finally gets to sleep, the 19 month old will wake up! I swear they are conspiring against me to never sleep again!!! Just wanted you to know you are not the only one going through this. One day we will sleep again!!! ;)

My pediatrician told me that at that age they do not need to eat at night. Basiclly he told us to not get up to feed our son once he was that age. He said to go in and comfort him while he is in his crib and then exit the room. Go back in every couple minutes to comfort, and then leave, don't turn on lights and try not too talk and definetly don't pick him up. DO NOT offer him any food over night, there is no reason for it. This wokred for us, our son has slept through the night most of his life, and he is 18 months old. (we started this at about 4 months old when he started waking up in the night again) I don't know if this helps, and I will tell you that it is really hard to do, but we needed our sleep, and it has not had any ill effects on our son. He is one of the happiest and well rested little guys you could ever meet.

I know exactly! how you feel. My 2 year old still doesn't sleep through the night. One thing that did help me get a little more rest though is a "baby food feeder". I bought mine at Wal-Mart for less than $5. It has 3 different tips. One looks like a spoon, one a bottle, and one a squishy sipper top. I would but some baby cereal in it and let him "drink" that before nursing him to sleep. This at least kept in asleep for about 6 hours. Even to this day he still eats some baby cereal before bed, and then takes his sippy cup to go lay down. But, for some reason he still wakes up a 4:00 am and wants some milk. My Ped assured me that this is somewhat normal and he will eventually grow out of it. He also advised REALLY watering it down for him in the middle of the night. He said that a lot of kids can't tell the difference between being hungry and being thirsty. He was probably thirsty, but didn't realize it, so was asking for the drink that also fills you up. I.e. - Milk! I don't know if it's okay to water down the formula for a 9/10 month old though.

Rest assured, you do not suffer alone! Like I said, the Ped assures me that my son WILL grow out of this. I just wish I knew when it was FINALLY going to be! Good luck, and hang in there. –Janell-

Try some of these ideas.....

After dinner do more active things to tire him out. If he is crawling, maybe chase him so he crawls fast. If it is possible sign up for a baby and mommie swim class. Do it as late as possible and this will help him sleep at night.

I know naps during the day are a God send, but maybe shorten his last nap of the day. Just becareful because if he is too tired he might be more to handle because he will be cranky.

Add cereal to his bottle. Just buy a nipple that is big so he can suck it out. Try a small amount at first so he does not know, then increase it.

The best is more active activities during the day. This will definately help. If not you sure have your hands full for the rest of your life :)

Try putting the cereal in the bottle making the milk or formula thicker. It will fill him up more. Try putting some weak chamomile tea (very relaxing and calming) in the bottle also or by itself if you can get him to drink it (doesn't taste very good with out sugar which you don't want to give him especially at night) and try giving him a warm bath (also relaxing) just before bedtime then rubbing some lavender (helps you sleep) lotion all over him before you lay him down. I am a WAHM of 9 children seven of my own and two step children. My children range in age from 17 yrs to 2 yrs and I also helped raise my two nephews and my niece since I was 15 yrs old. I am not a Dr so before you use the chamomile tea I would suggest you ask your Dr. research it on the internet. I have however used all these remedies with my own children with good results. Good Luck to you. I can sympathize because one of my children had suffered from colic. Please let me know if you decide to try any of these suggestions and how they worked for you. :o)

Does he cry alot, or he just want to be up and play? Maybe try switching formulas, if this is the case. How many naps does he take during the day? I know we have actually had to start keeping my 10 month old up a little later at night, so he doesnt keep waking up.. And yes he can be a major pill about it LOL. Also does he take a paci? We call it a bink or binky LOL. At first we thought our son was constantly hungry, but it turned out he just wanted something to suck on, since he took his binky, he's alot better... Also could he be teething?
Sorry just kind of throwing ideas out there LOL. I dont know if you have tried these or not ;o)
Good luck!

C.

Hi M.,

Hope to maybe offer a few suggestions. You did not mention how many naps and for how long he may take them during the day. If he takes 2 naps maybe cutting one of the naps out to make him more tired at night. Or try keeping him up a little later than you normally would put him to bed.

If that is not the issue then, Maybe set up an evening ritual... for example... after dinner and clean up, maybe have the whole family take a relaxing evening walk (weather permitting of course)Or even play a family game (something tiring for him like Hullabaloo by Cranium)-or even just turn on the radio and have a family dance time. After walk/game/dance give him a nice warm tub and get him all comfortable. Then perhaps sit in a relaxing chair in a quiet room with him give him a nice warm bottle of milk (you can even add a few tsp of cereal to the milk if he will take that and you can sneak it in) And read him a book. Before putting him to sleep make sure he has a clean diaper and has given you a burp.

Try to tire him out as much as you can during the day. Some other things I actually STILL do with my children once I tuck them in is tell them in a soft voice It's sleepytime, and pretend to sprinkle "sleepy seeds" on them. In order to activate my special "sleepy seeds" I must kiss them on their foreheads, the bridge of their nose and give eye kisses on both eyes. This usually helps to get them to fall asleep almost instantly.

He may not need more than one nap a day, or he could be having growth spurts. I have noticed with EACH of my kids that when growth spurts would happen my nightly sleeps or lack there of would get interupted quite a bit. Ask your pediatrition if he/she can offer and other ideas to get him to sleep through the night. Could it maybe be discomfort from teething? You could also apply some teething gel or something before putting him down.

I also notice with my 4 month old, sometimes she will cry out in the middle of the night but when I check on her she is totally sleeping so I don't bother her and she continues to sleep. Another thing you can try is instead of feeding him when he wakes up cuddle him and maybe rock him back to sleep, he may have just had a bad dream and wants to make sure you are still around. I'm not sure how clingy he is with you... but my 5 yr old was this way when he was little and he was VERY clingy to me. Sometimes he just wanted to make sure I was still avail. to him. If he wakes up more than once a night try to not feed him one of those times... then gradually get rid of the next feeding. Another thing that it could be is habit. Kinda like having your internal alarm wake you up. Which is might be good to try to just cuddle and rock him instead of feeding, gradually cutting back on nightly feedings. I personally would check for a burp or perhaps a dirty diaper when he wakens, he may not even be hungry. My 4 month old little girl seems to always want her diaper changed, I always check that first then go for a burp, now sometimes yes they may want a feeding... but try checking other issues first. I would definately try to cut out at least one of the feedings if possible.

It may take awhile so don't get discouraged. But the sooner you teach him to get a good night's sleep the easier it will be on you! I completely understand how tough it can be. I have 3 myself, a 13 yr old, a 5 yr old and a 4 month old. It is definately a challenge when you have older children! Good luck!

M.,

I hate to say it but some kids are just not natural sleepers. My first son kept up that waking every 2-3 hours thing until he was 2 years old. I read everything and tried everything and nothing worked.... He suddenly, out of the blue, slept through the night for the first time about a month before his second birthday. He's 3.5 now and he sleeps through the night about half the time.... His little brother is 6 months old and sleeps through the night about half the time.... If I had to guess, I'd say my 6 month old probably actually wakes less than his brother.... And I have to say that I've done nothing really different with ds2 than ds1, ds2 is just more of a sleeper (and let me tell you, I'm really grateful for that). So you'll probably get lots of advice and you'll weed through it and pick what works for you but my biggest advice is to go to bed earlier. Your son may be just simply not ready to sleep through the night and if that is the case, the best thing you can do is just try to plan your night so that you get a decent amount of sleep anyway. One thing that you can try is to let your husband start doing some of the night time comforting. LOL

:-)T.