Help for My 8 Year Old Bedwetter

My son had this problem for awhile and we bought him something similiar to pull-ups but they were for bigger kids. (good-nights?) He could put them on under his boxer shorts and no one could tell he had them on. After 6 months or so, this didn't happen anymore. I don't know what happened, maybe he did "outgrow" it, but no more accidents. And, my son was about 12 at the time.

Hi D.! This is a shot in the dark, however, it worked for my son who had the exact issue. He is now 10 and has not had an 'accident' for two years since I eliminated 'Red Dye #40' from his diet. I was researching food allergies for one of my other 5 children and ran across an article that was very informative on the negative side effects of 'Red 40'. I'd look into it...you never know! Best of luck to you both! T.

I have a 10 year old son that is a bed wetter. It isn't always a lot, but there is always some. If you havn't talked to his Dr. yet, than I would suggest doing so. It is much more common in boys for some reason, and usually they do grow out of it. If he is spending the night with friends, there is a prescription that is available for that. I would not go that route for years, but now let my son take it for overnights, and it works well.

There is a Chiropractor in Twinsburg, Dr. Paul Bizjak, that helps with bedwetting. My son's Occupational Therapist took her son there for bedwetting and he cured it with in 3 months. The office name is Twinsburg Family Chiropractic.

To give you a glimmer of hope... our almost 15 year old son had the same problem for years and years and years. Absolutely nothing was wrong with him. We tried cutting off liquids, raising (or lowering, I can't remember now) part of his bed, giving him a spoonful of honey before bed,waking him up at a certain time... all to no avail.. When he would fall asleep he is just such a deep sleeper he wouldn't wake up. He didn't like to sleep at any friends" homes because of it either.(same age as yours!!!) Of course I would always tell him to go to the bathroom right before bed. Well it got better and he finally completely outgrew it by the time he was 10ish. So you may have a little while yet, but he WILL outgrow it, and TRY to be patient because he probably feels worse about it than you do! Good luck! He also wore the bigger "Good Nights" because I didn't want to wash everything on him and his bed every night. My friend's son also had the same problem. He outgrew it and he's 22. I think more kids(especially boys) have it than you think. Don't rush out and spend a bunch of money on medical possibilities that probably won't work!!!

D.- My sister had this problem growing up too. She did have some medical issues but the problem still continued after treatment. I think holding fluids from him is a good idea. I truely think my sisters problem was that she fell in such a deep sleep, nothing would wake her. Do you have problems getting him up for school in the mornings?

Some children are known to be night time "urinators" (if there is such a word). I noticed that you didn't mention the use of any kind of medications. There are many of them and work great. If you ask your pediatrician I'm sure they would help. Usually they do not prescribe them before the age of 7, but since your son is 9, I don't see any reason why they wouldn't. This is a very difficult time for your son and he is growing so much emotionally. I would seek help, ASAP. Hope this helps a little.

I too was a bedwetter. I understand his pain and bewilderment over sleepovers, etc. Way back then, ("then" being the 60's) they tried pills, waking me up, etc. and like your son, nothing worked. I remember having very vivid dreams where I had gotten out of the bed, walked down the stairs and went to the bathroom, but I would wake-up in a wet bed. My younger brother was also a bedwetter, so you can imagine my mother's days and she was a SAHM as well.

Strangely enough, when I turned 13 it all stopped. They never considered it to be a sleep disorder. Everyone thought I was too lazy to get up to go to the bathroom and didn't mind sleeping in a wet bed. Believe me, this was NOT the case!

My younger brother also had the same thing happen to him. By the time we were in 8th grade, it stopped. I'm not sure if sleep patterns change when you hit puberty or not, but they must because we both stopped.

I don't have any great advice, other than my mother always told everyone that I went to spend the night with about the bedwetting. Yes, it was embarrassing, but I didn't miss-out on sleepovers at least. Being a girl, the other little girls never made a big thing over it and I wasn't taunted at school, but then I went to a religious school and we were taught early on about bullying.

What I am getting at is that your son could end-up having a similar experience. There is hope. There is at least one famous person that I know of that was a bedwetter and that was Michael Landon (the father on Little House on the Prairie). He even did a made-for-tv-movie about the subject.

In the meantime, at home, at least, have you thought about trying Depends? I also saw a commercial recently tv that they are making these shorts for bedwetters that look fairly normal..just like shorts...so maybe sleepovers wouldn't be such a traumatic thing.

You are obviously very sensitive to his needs about this and although it makes a whole lot more work for you, please stay that way for his sake. I applaud you for that.
J.

We are going thru the same thing with my daughter right now and she is 6. She gets UTIs very easily and has had several tests done. We have gone to two urologist and the first one said it was behavioral due to being the only child. Well, my doctor sent us to a different one and he had different things to say. I don't know that I have anything new to add that the other moms haven't already said except some names of thing. The medicine that the mom was talking about is a desmopressin pill or spray and it is called DDAVP. The shorts are called "GoodNights" and are in the baby aisle. They also come in a pullup still and are decorated up for a boy or girl. You can also buy a generic cheaper pullup version at Dollar General. We were also told by the urologist and a separate nurse pratitioner that typically one of the parents had the same problem and the child will stop around the same time the parent did. Also, that the holding off the liquids works in some kids and not others and that we should wake her up before we go to bed and if we wanted it to be a "family affair" we could set an alarm for about 3am and make her go again. He also mentioned the alarm they go to bed with and he said that sometimes the child is such a sound sleeper that it doesn't work. I don't know if any of this really helps you but I thought I would share it.

I too was a bedwetter. Mine lasted until I was 14. Nothing worked for me either. My mom just washed special bedding every day & never complained. Nobody wets the bed on purpose. Just be supportive. It affects your self-esteem. Let him know he's not the only one. Maybe you could find out if some of his friends have the same problem & he could stay with them. 4 out of 5 of my kids wet the bed too. My mom did until she was 14 also. You can buy pull-ups & put 1 in the bottom of a sleeping bag & when he knows he's in bed for the night he can change & in the morning he can change out of it before he climbs out. Have him roll up his sleeping bag right away & no ones the wiser. Tell him he's not alone. It's more common than you think.

I concur!!! Take him to a chiropractor. I go to one in Twinsburg that is awesome and has had great success in curing bedwetting for children. They're very reasonable and a lot of insurances cover this treatment. (You might end up discovering the MANY capabilities a chiropractor has and have the whole family there. They're amazing!!!)

I have a DD who's 7 1/2 yrs and a DS who's 6 yrs they are both bedwetter's. The doctor said it runs in families. My DH wet till he was 11 yrs old. I can only pray it won't last as long. My troubles are finding waterproof covers that last w/o ripping, shrinking or melting. Can anyone recommend a good one??
I am going to look into the #40 red though. Sounds good enough to look into.

My son wet the bed from age 5 to age 9. He wouldn't go to sleep overs because of it. He also sucked his fingers until then. At age 9, he decided to quite sucking his fingers and had me tape them at night so he wouldn't. THe bedwetting just stopped on its own soon after.

My son turned 10 yesterday .. he also was a nightly bedwetter until about a year ago ... one solution we found was that we realized he wasn't getting quality sleep ... his adenoids and tonsils were large and he wasn't breathing well at night. Once we had them removed his bedwetting got better ... then about 9 months later it just completely stopped ... not sure if it was because he "outgrew" it or if it was from the surgery ... but thankfully it did stop.

I have a 9 year old with the same problem. His doctor told us to talk it over with the pediatrician. They recommended us to make sure if we are told to see a urologist to make sure it is an actual pediatric urologist. He may have a small bladder. It could also be a sensory problem or even that he is just a deep sleeper. One question, is there anything else going on with your child. My son was late in many developmental milestones. He did not start talking until 3 and then we had to put him in a preschool to get him to talk. He is very a bright student, he just is behind in his communication skills. I have yet to schedule an appt for him but I plan i doing it at his regular physical appt. I am also curious how people respond to this for me. I know I don't want to stress my child over this, it does not solve anything.

Try www.enuresiscontrolclinic.com I am using the program with my 8 year old now. Go to the web site and get the information. They guarentee success or they will give you your money back. You are right it is a sleep disorder. They correct the sleep disorder by interupting the sleep cycle. Good Luck!

My son was the same way. When he was 6 we went to a Urologist and he suggested a "potty pager". It was like $50 and he was completely 100% cured within 3 months. What it does is when they begin to urinate it starts vibrating & waking him up. Eventually they wake up before they wet the bed. He was having dry nights by 1 month and no longer needed it after 3. You can put it right in the front pouch of regular underwear, not boxers. I might have more info at home on the pager & where you can buy it at home since I did have to mail away for it. I also have the dr. name & info that you might be able to get the info from them too on where to get it if you are intersted.

Ask your doc for desmopressin. It works very well and is inexpensive. Shannon

My sister has a 12 year old with the same problem. There is a pill that the doctor gave them for him to take. You can only take it for like 6 months or something but it really helped. He still has a few accidents but not nearly as many. I wish I new what it was called. My sister is on vacation so I can't ask her. Ask your doctor?????

It seems you've taken the necessary steps to find out the source of this problem. You didn't mention any psychological issues that may be contributing to it, so it seems you have a perfectly healthy child on your hands. I have worked with older children (up to age 15) with this problem and have found the best way to handle it is to simply provide empathy and discuss ways to cope with the issue. Barring any effective medication, this may simply be one of those unsolvable problems...at least until he outgrows it.

We had & sometimes still do have the same situation wiht my 12 year old son. We have found that limiting his intake of sugar & caffeine after a certain time of day put a stop to it. Dinner is the last opportunity he has to have anything sugary or caffeinated. This is dinner no later than 6:00. If we happen to have dinner later than that-we sometimes do because both my husband & myself work full time jobs so it's hard during the week sometimes. At any rate, after 6:00 he can have milk or water (& that's in limited quantities)& no obviously sugared things (candy, cookies, juice, etc.) Give it a shot & see how it works for you & your son. On the weekends we go to bed a little later so the deadline is a little later. We try to make it about 4 hours prior to bedtime.
Good luck!!

The only thing that helps is to wake them once or twice a night to go to the bathroom. This will train them to wake when they have to urinate and, hopefully, not wet while they are asleep. I also had this problem until I was 11, and we didn't have pull-ups or anything like that when I was a little girl. My mother was told to wake me and have me go to the bathroom. My oldest son (now 7) has the same issue. Sometimes the size of the child's bladder, or the bladder muscles not being strong enough to hold urine that long, is the culprit. Also, some children sleep so soundly they cannot wake and realize that they need to go to the bathroom. I would not label it a problem, though. Just explain to your son that these are the circumstances right now and he should not be ashamed of it. A lot of his friends have the same problem and feel the same way. There are a lot of new products that look just like boxers, etc.; and they hold the "accidents" very well and no one needs to know that he is wearing them really! Just make sure you choose something dependable and be very discreet (since he is self-conscious) about making sure he is wearing the product when he goes for a sleep-over. I have handled this issue with my son in this way and it does not stress him out at all. After all, it's no one's business what they are wearing under their p.j.'s anyway! I think when we stress about something, it can definitely rub off on our children. So don't make a big deal out of it. God Bless!

Hi D.,
I hope you will accept some thoughts from a Grandma. I too was a bedwetter and have a l3 yr. old Granddaughter with the same problem. I am 68 and in the 60 or more years of progress the medical community has not been able to answer to the reason why this occurs. I am glad to see you have checked out medical reasons first. What I contribute it to is depth of sleep. This is something he cannot control and he would if it were in his power to do so. The stigma is less these days than it was in mine but that doesn't take away his fear of being discovered. My Granddaughter sleeps so soundly that she never even remembers our getting her up and is so sad when she has an accident. We use protective bedding and she takes care of the laundry herself. She now has long periods of being dry which is very encouraging since this is exactly the way it was for me. The "outgrow" seems to be the answer. As a M. my advice is make sure you give him the most important thing you can - SELF ESTEEM. Never let anyone ridicule him for something he cannot control. Lots of hugs help too. You both are in our prayer.

D.,
When my previously potty-trained son started suddenly wetting the bed at five-years-old, I had no idea what was going on. Luckily I took him to a chiropractor for another condition. This chiropractor also practiced holistic medicine, and so I mentioned the problem to her. She investigated and found out that he had some food allergies, specifically dairy products. We were eating ice cream almost every night as a "treat". As I understand it, since his body couldn't process the ice cream, it simply got it out of the body as soon as possible. He could not control it. Other foods that can cause this are peanut butter and popcorn, and there are probably others...all common foods for kids.
You might check into it. When we took away the ice cream & switched to sherbet, not only did the bed-wetting stop immediately, but also a slight rash under the skin on his knees & elbows, which we hadn't even paid much attention to disappeared.
Hope that helps.
G. Roges
A Little about me: My kids are all in their 20's now. I have three grandchildren, ages 4 1/2, 6, and 7. Married for 27 years, I work outside the home.

Tahke him to a CHIROPRACTOR NOW!!!!! My husband is a chiropractor in Wooster Oh (soon to be transferring to Canton OH) and has helped SO MANY children with bedwetting issues!!!!!
The care is noninvasive, quick and easy, you should see results in a couple of weeks, maybe even as soon as a few days!

Hi D.,
I've not had any bedwetters yet, but love him all you can. Have you tried the nite-time underwear out there. Maybe that would give him some confidence for a sleepover. I had a friend that used to wet the bed and I'm sure she was terribly embarrassed, even though I never picked on her. They didn't have anything like that then! God Bless!

Hi D.,
I am not sure that i have any the advice you are seeking but I do sympathize with you. My son is now 12 and he finally stopped wetting the bed around age 10. I cut him off drinks around 6pm everynight, made him go to the bathroom whether he felt he needed to or not just before bed and even woke him up before I went to bed. His doctor told me there was nothing they could do that he would grow out of it and sure enough he did!! He was also leary of overnights but did pretty well if he did stay the night somewhere. My son would try to hide the sheets in the morning so his younger sister and dad wouldn't see them, we made a deal that if he woke up wet to remove the sheets and place them in the laundry room, take a shower and mum would be the word. He was really good about that and appreciative at the same time that everyone else didn't know about his problem. I didn't think he was ever going to grow out of it but amazingly he just stopped wetting the bed. Hang in there, there is light at the end of the tunnel. My best advice is to not make a big deal about it and let him know that it's ok and noone needs to know about it. Best of luck to you and your son.

We are currently going through the same thing with our 8 year old boy. Right now we are doing the alarm. We, too, have done all the medical testing. We tried Desmopressin pills and they did not work. A friend whose is a pharmacist just the other day told my husband about Desmopressin nose spray. She swears the pills don't work and the nose spray does. She said she's seen it in her patients and also uses it for her own son and he's been dry ever since. Good luck!

Dear D., my daughter was a bed wetter till almost 10. we also were told there was nothing wrong with her and she would out grow it. We noticed it happened more offten when she was very tired and slept very soundly. We told her she was not at fault and that there was nothing wrong with her. We had a rule in the family that know one was to tease her or tell anyone about it. We kept a blanket and pillow on the couch in the family room along with dry PJs. In the morning if I found her on the couch, I would wake her for school with nothing said about wetting the bed. while she was in school I would go in and change her bed,[plastic sheets under the bedsheets]. She would come home and life went on. She is now a very happy lawyer, and will be getting married this fall.Like you none of my other children had this problem, but we handled it as a family, with love and respect and they are all still very close. Reasure your son, make him feel that it is no big deel and he should be fine. E.

I had 2 children with the same problem. Nothing wrong with them. I got good advice from a wise Dr. He said ignore it totally. Change the sheets-say nothing to the child in any demeaning way. Mine both quit on their own at about age 10. For sleepovers I always forewarned the Mom ahead of time and sent a sleeping bag with extra pad inside to sleep on, plus extra clothes. My son always did well with that and surprisingly his friends thought nothing of it nor my daughters also. Good luck! J.

Hello D.,
Thank God it was medical, and he will out grow it, have strenght for him, it hates it worse than anyone, have him to wear depends, and nothing to drink 2 hours before going to bed. This help me when my brothers child spend the night with us. He wouldn't wet to bed. But he is the one believe it or not that is hurt by it more than anyone. '
Do you to say prayer togther before he goes to bed, when you do, pray with him, that God will help cure him from this. Let God handle it, and he will feel better that you can let him turn his troubles over to God.
You never know, with nothing to drink for 2 hours or 3 isn't a bad thing it's just so he won't let it be all over the place, he could be a hard sleeper. And wearing depends, won't have you always washing sheets. Thank God, And praying to God, and turning it over to him, will make him feel.God can and will heal him, and the sooner the better. For he can't spend overnight things, with kids he's age cause kids are mean and cruel. And for him to have that freedom will make him feel better, but if it doesn't work within 6 to 8 weeks have doctors retest him, they could of over looked something.
Best of Luck God Bless Prayer for our soon to be 9 year old. will have had a blessing by the time he reaches 9. No more bed wetter
L. A

Does he have nightmares at all?I am so sorry he is going thru this.I know you said taking fluids out before bed does not help.Have you tried though taking the fluids away within 2 hours of him sleeping and making him use the restroom before bed?Are you sure he is not sneaking anything to drink?Just trying to help out all I can.

From a Mom who's been ther, done that. My son (14) finally stopped wetting the bed a few years ago. My one daughter(a twin) also wet the bed for many years. From speaking with family members, this is common in our extended family. I finally started buying pull-ups - now they make them more like underwear for older kids - and had him wear cotton knit boxers over them. When he woke in the moring, he just removed the pull-ups & trashed them. As an older bed-wetter, he usually did not wet much. When invited to a sleepover, same thing; just put pullup in a zip loc bag in his duffle until he threw it away at home. (If it was family or close friend, I would usually talk to the Mom about the situation, and often she pitche din to sectretly help. i.e. making sure he went to bathroom late at night if they were up late, waking him up before the others, disposing of pull-up at her house, etc) depends on the relationship.

Hi D.,
I also have a 10 year old son with the same problem. I also had the bedwetter problem as a child and I did outgrow it by age 11 or 12. My youngest sister had the problem and she too stopped at age 12. So stay positive and encourage your son he too will outgrow it very son. Maybe it is something that runs in our family.

This is really tough. My 6 year old step son still wetted the bed every night. After ruling out medical conditions, I thought that maybe it was psychological. I bought "Depends" (pads for adults) and we put them on him at night. He agreed to trying it b/c he was so frustrated with the bedwetting. He hated the Depends b/c it made him feel like a baby and the pads were not the most comfortable for him. Wouldn't you know it though, within 2 weeks he was dry. Whatever it was that kept him from being able to control his urination or waking up when he had to go, I still don't know to this day. I just know that the Depends worked.

I have a nephew with the same problem and he will be 8 in July. You need to take your son to see a urologist. They have meds that they can put him on that will help him.

Hello,

I am a nurse and mother of 5. I too had that problem as a child. I would wet the bed. I did grow out of it, but things to do no caffeine,and cut off the fluids 2 hours before going to be. I aloso went to the bathroom right before I went to bed. I was a very deep sleeper and slept well. I did not wake up to go to the bathroom,. Good Luck, I think he will grow out of it.

D., Your story of your son just broke my heart. My youngest son had a bed wetting problem too. I even tried plying him with rewards or making him wash his own laundry. After many doctor visits and failed attempts, including the alarm system that woke everyone but my son,he finally grew out of it. Fluid restriction helps some. Toilet him a few hours after he goes to bed whether he's awake or not.
My son stopped around the age of 9-10, my other 2 children never had the problem and neither have any of my 5 grandchildren, Three of them being my sons'.
My prayers are with you.
K. D.