My son is 15 mths. old and is still waking up a couple of times during the night. The only way I can get him back to sleep is by giving him a bottle of milk. I have tried letting him "soothe himself" back to sleep but all he does is cry (scream.) I know this is not good for his health and teeth and it is already a bad habit. I know he is not hungry when he wakes at night, I think it is just out of habit. Does anyone have any good ideas on how to end this bad habit before he gets any older.
We like the books "The No Cry Sleep Solution" and "The No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers" by Elizabeth Pantley.
Hi H.,
I had the same problem with my oldest boy when he was that age. I would give him a snack before bed time, something healthy, and he got to where he would sleep through the nite.
Definitely replace the milk bottle with a water bottle. He'll get mad about it, but this is when you have to tell yourself that "I'm the mommy and I know what's best" -- it's so hard to upset them sometimes, even if it's for their own good :-)
Then you need to pick a Friday night to start your sleep training experience, and make yourself a couple pots of coffee...and maybe pick a long overdue cleaning project to tackle while you're up in the middle of the night. It's a good time to organize a closet :-). There will be a lot of crying at first, but when you think about it, he can't cry forever!
There are several methods for sleep training, you just need to pick one and stick through it. There's the "Babywise" way, where you put him to bed, then check on him in 5 minutes, then 10, then 15, etc. If he wakes again after sleeping a while, you do the same thing -- check back in 5, 10, etc. Stay consistent and it should only take 3 or 4 nights before you can sleep all night. Cleaning out the closet is a good way to distract yourself from the crying!
There's the "sleep lady" way, as described in the book "Good night, sleep tight." The first night, you put him to bed and sit in a chair next to his bed/crib until he falls asleep. He'll still cry, but you can talk to him to soothe him, or pat his back, but don't pick him up. You do this for about 3 nights, then you move your chair a little further away from his bed and do it 2 or 3 more nights. Eventually, you're sitting in the hall outside his door, then you can get out of your chair and do "job checks" (I'm going to put laundry in the washer, I'll be right back to check on you...). This method takes longer, but a) it's a great opportunity to read a few good books while you're sitting in a chair waiting for him to fall asleep, and b) a lot of moms like it because they don't feel like they're "abandoning" their baby since they're sitting in the room with them while he cries.
The book "Happiest Toddler on the Block" might have yet another methid.
Good luck!
Pick a Friday night to start. Go in his room WITHOUT a bottle. Tell him it is time for sleep, pat his bottom in his crib for a minute and then leave. He will cry. Wait a few minutes and then go back in and do the same extending the time that you stay away/he cries. I just finished doing this with my youngest except it was nursing. It has been since Sunday and tonight I put him in his bed awake and said night night and he waved at me and said bye bye. He woke up once last night and I patted his bottom told him it was night night and he went back to sleep. I wouldn't let him cry for 30 minutes or anything, but it is okay to let them cry for a few minutes. They are just experiencing separation anxiety.
Be sure that your child gets plenty to eat at dinner time and maybe give him a filling snack before brushing his teeth. Giving a bottle at bedtime will coat the teeth with a film and stay there all night and thus giving our natural bacteria in our mouths a chance to feed off the milk film on the teeth. If he has to have a bottle , fill it with water,not milk. Sometime, crying is the last reort but it eventually cause the child to go to sleep. Also, when your child wakes up in the middleof the night, go to them, change their diaper ,if necessary, pat them reassuringly,shut their bdrm door and walk out. If a child is picked eadh time a cry is uttered, it will only worsen the situation.
H.,
I've been a single mom before and I know it's tough not to just do the quick fix to get through the day, or night in this case. As someone else mentioned, but sure he has a nice snack before you bathe him and brush his teeth. If he doesn't have a bedtime ritual and a consistent bedtime that can make things harder. Try telling him "it's time to get ready for bed" and then consistently do the snack, the bath, the brushing of teeth and then a story. Since you know he won't be hungry, you won't feel so guilty about him crying in the night. I finally just had to let my oldest cry it out one night. It was a long, hard night but it got better after that. Just reassure him, don't pick him up and don't give him a bottle of milk. When he makes it through the night tell him "yea, you're a big boy" and maybe give him a reward of some kind.
Good luck.
S.
PS - I work for a dr's office in Cleburne also. Who do you work for? (Respond private)
Does he get a pacifier? My son was easy to transition to no bottle in the night. I thought it would be a lot harder than it was. Whenever he gets up I stick the paci in and he goes right back to sleep. Sometimes I do have to rock him a little or pat his back.
I think I would just stop. I know its hard. Especially since you are a single mom and need all the sleep you can get and sometimes its just easier to give in. But I guess if you want to get rid of a habit you just have to stop cold turkey.
switch to water for starters. i did a few weeks ago for my 14 monthold. she still gets frustrated with me, but she gets over it. it's better than nothing. and are you sure he gets enough during the day? not to sound like i know more or what ever, but when my daughter is going through a growth spurt she eats more then my 3 year old twins! like a lot more!
