Help!! BC Wisdom Needed!!

I know you said you hated the pill, but did you try more then one form of pill? The first time I was put on the pill it made me sick, and broke my skin out so bad. When I went to see my doc she had me stop it immediately. When I got pregnant I told my ob/gyn my fear and he said he has a lower dose pill that works great. In fact its the form of BC pill that breastfeeding moms can use. I have never been sick, and I have never experienced any side affects. I also hated having to take it everyday, but honestly I like sex too much to forget to take it. =) Good Luck.

Don't forget about the copper IUD.

And DO remember... that although both Mirena (hormones) & Paraguard (no hormones) have horror stories... so do each and every single other form of birthcontrol (from strokes or bloodclots while on the pill, to latex allergies causing anaphalatic shock using condoms or diaphragms, to vaginal spasm on the ring so bad it has to be removed under local anesthesia, to _______). Really, whenever ANYTHING goes badly, it's not good. Also... the "goes badly" is just very very rare.

I'm BIG fan of Paraguard, but it's because the pregnancy rate is lower than if you've had a tubal ligation, there's no hormones, and afte 3 super-cramp periods (normal, almost everyone has 1-3 crappy periods padded with midol, waterbottles, and chocolate), I can remove it at any time and be back to fertile-myrtle, and it's been 8 years of bliss for me on Paraguard.

Some women don't tolerate them.. but some women don't tolerate latex (like me, I happen to be allergic to latex).

i loved loved having the paraguard iud.. its the copper one.. doesnt have any hormones..for me it was like not having anything.. nothing to remmber to take or go get or anything... i was on it for 4.5 years before deciding to get pregnant.. got pregnant 1 month after removal!

Haha, this is funny! I have the Mirena and for me it's great! I too have heard horror stories, though, so I do understand your hesitation. Pregnancy is really unlikely on the Mirena, and although it's bad news, you can't dwell on it b/c the statistics are in your favor that it won't happen.

I'm not a huge risk taker either, but if abstinence isn't a long term option (and why should it be!;) you're going to have to keep trying until you find something you like. I'm sure you've talked to your doctor about this, but ask again and see what other options are available. At least with Mirena, the worst case scenerio (probably) is that you just have it removed and start over.

What is wrong with a condom? If you are playful enough before hand...it isn't too bothersome.

Here's some info from the past. I used a diaphragm with a spermacide for years. It can be left in for hours prior to having intercourse. Use more spermacide if it's been in a day or more and you don't want to take it out. I think it has to be left in for an extended period after intercourse. It's not as effective as several others but it's still listed as moderately effective in the charts.

At the time my gyn said that if I'd faithfully used both the diaphragm and the spermacide the odds against pregnancy were nearly as good as the pill. I didn't get pregnant but that proves nothing. You could at least use something like this until you decide more definitely on something.

Another use for the diaphragm is to temporarily stop the flow during your period. Really handy at times. lol

I would also recommend the patch as a temporary measure if you want to continue considering more permanent options. You might like it and it's not expensive like the rings and the IUD and you can stop using it at any time.

My daughter had an IUD with no hormones but she cut off the string so short she couldn't feel if it was still in place. She ended up with a tubal pregnancy and was told that the incidences of tubal pregnancies is higher with this IUD. Other than the tubal pregnancy she liked it. And the fact that apparently she lost it.

All bc requires consistency, even the IUD which can dislodge so it's placement needs to be checked regularly.

She has told me that her body reacted differently to forms of hormonal bc after her first pregnancy. Which suggests that you could try one of the previous ones that was unsatisfactory before. Also I think their are pills that contain less hormone than they did 5 years ago.

You might try telling your stubborn man that a larger size condom means he's larger. lol or is he not macho in that way?

I am another that will sugest non-hormonal forms of BC. I will not use hormonal BC because of the side effects and the (all to frequent) stories of women being unable to get pregnant after taking them.
I used a diaphram for years and never got pregnant. The two big +'s imo are that you can put it in earlier in the day so there is no "oh wait a minute Honey..." and you can use it during your period to hold back your flow (making sex a lot more appealing during your period).
I also used the non-hormonal version IUD and loved it. The only side effects I had was I cramped a little more often then w/out it and my period lasted one day longer. I got it removed the first of last July and got pregnant in August (our son is now almost 3months old). So no 'waiting for your body to go back to normal' like w/ the hormones.

Fertility Awareness Method works. Get the book and follow it right. during your fertile phase, you can also use condoms or latex free condoms if you're bothered by latex. I found them online. There are no side effects at all with these. Good luck!

I know some women have great experiences with the IUD, but mine was terrible. I passed out twice the day I got it (which is normal in some patients). I couldn't quit shaking either. It was really scary since I was home alone with my 3 month old. Then, I had the general spotting as expected. However, every time I spotted, I felt like I was getting a full blown period; bloating, headaches, backaches, and cramps that made me nauseous. I eventually had it taken out 5 months because even though my period had almost disappeared, I felt like I was on it at least 3 weeks out the month. I just couldn't take it anymore. They say it can take 6 months for your body to adjust to it. I tried to keep it in and adjust to it since we spent $300 on it. After 5 months though, it wasn't even a little better, so I couldn't see how one more month would make a difference. I also kept getting painful cysts that came and went every month. Even after it is out, I keep having weird pains that I am pretty sure are because of it since I didn't have them before. However, I haven't been to my gyn to confirm that, so I don't want to say that for sure.

I also have a friend who didn't really have many side effects with it, but she is considering getting her taken out just because she has no sex drive at all anymore. She got it in about 8 months ago while her husband was overseas. It didn't matter much then, but now that he is back, she wants her sex drive back.

If your insurance covers most or all the cost, I would still give it a try though. I have known a few girls who have it and love it. I was not one of them, but you never know until you try. Good luck!!

we use condoms with no problem. There's no reason to compromise your fertility with extra hormones. There are more than one size, you're husband is being very weird about this.

I can cartainly understand your concerns. What about condoms? I wanted more children but not every 9mo and I did the IUD. I did get pregnant but lost the baby and then fertility issues developed and went 4 years using nothing and didn't get pregnant for the whole 4 years. I started to feel like I would never get pregnant so I got my tubes tied after the second birth. I did want more but have health issues and thought it was the wiser choice. I should have used condoms it would have been less stressful in the end. But they can break, Proof my 2 grandsons.

they make a hormone free iud

I successfully tracked my fertility and used condoms when they were needed for over 2 years after having my second, then successfully got pregnant on the first try using charting when we were ready.
Get the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" and learn how to track your fertility so you know when you need to use a condom. If partner won't use a condom you have 2 choices - tell him no condom = no nookie, or get female condoms.
Even Mirena has hormones. You can check into Paraguard which is also an IUD but has no hormones. I know in Indiana you can get Paraguard for free through the health department. You do need to understand that both IUDs are abortion devices. Many women don't mind, but if you believe that life starts at conception, then an IUD is not for you. They work by thinning the lining of the uterus so that a fertilized egg can't implant like it's supposed to and then is aborted when the lining is sloughed off during your period.
I started charting because I hated how I felt on hormonal BC, I had the same issues with the Depo shot, and my insurance wouldn't cover the Mirena and I wasn't a good candidate for the Paraguard because I already had heavy, painful periods and it usually makes them worse.
Charting is easy once you get the hang of it - usually a couple months during which you just always use a condom. PM me if you want any more info or have any questions.

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I just saw your update. It may not be that the size is wrong but that he's putting it on wrong. Very few men actually need a bigger size, but many don't know how to put it on correctly which won't make a bigger one work any better.
A diaphram or a cervical cap are good options, but they aren't very effective on their own, you'll need to use a good amount of spermicidal jelly or cream as well. Do your research and make sure you know how effect each option and how to use it correctly.