Help - Grapeland,TX

just my 2 cents... But I would want my baby to have my last name. I think it would be easier than explaining when you go to the doctors or to school that you are not Mrs. X-boyfriend last name. You are Ms. Maiden-name mother of Johnny X-boyfriend.

Hello, well my daughter went through the exact same thing almost. She waas 19 and he was almost 17. Yes, he can sign the B.C at the hospital. You can not just put his name on there without him coming in there to sign. That is great that he wants to be there for the baby. Good luck and congrats on the baby.

Research this VERY carefully, and per the laws in your State:

For example:
http://singleparents.about.com/od/legalissues/f/unwed_mot...
http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview?id=438245
http://www.ehow.com/about_###-###-####_father_s-child_s-l...
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=2010101312305...

http://freelawanswer.com/law/2296-1-law-1.html
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/FAQ/628
I would... also look into getting an Attorney... you will need one, eventually...

Key thing to remember, he may 'sign' the certificate... but that is not saying you HAVE TO give your baby HIS last name.
2 different things.
And you are not married to him...

And even if he is saying 'now'... that he wants to be there for baby... chances are.... he will not. Many men, married or not... change their minds, once 'reality' sets in. Or they are only responsible... only when it suits their mood.
And when/if your baby's Daddy... gets another new girlfriend... then what??? He is only 17 years old.
What if he goes around fertilizing more gardens and has more accidental kids?

I personally... would NOT give your baby 'his' last name.

Also I would not use a 'hyphenated' last name. Hyphenated last names, are, legally taken as one whole name.... but if the name is NOT hyphenated... a person can legally, use either last name.

Just use your last name, for baby.
That is what my friend did, for her kids... when her boyfriend, was just a jerk. And still was.... even after the kids were born. And still is... even though her kids are now 16 years old.

Does he plan on providing child support?

My opinion: it is best for children if their fathers are involved in their lives. And guys care a lot about things like biology and names. Therefore, if you give your baby his father's last name, he will be more likely to support him financially and be involved in his life.

So I think you should give him the dad's last name. A name is just a name, but dad's involvement is critical.

Think long and hard about the name thing before you decide. I am not trying to sway you in any way, but having a different last name than yours is going to cause people to ask him why for many, many years...and some kids are embarassed by the fact that mom or dad are single parents or atleast embarrassed by the constant "why is your name_____ but your mom is _____" question. Additionally, sometimes is complicates paperwork and filing of certain documents.

On the off chance you and the father end up on very bad terms, it is also going to be a constant reminder of dad, which may be taxing a few years down the road if he hasn't paid child support or whatever. Changing a name is complicated, and on the off chance you are upset with him someday...you may kick yourself for this decision.

I am not telling you not to...but I would think long and hard about the ramifications if things with you and dad go bad.

Of course he can sign it, but that puts you under NO obligation to use his last name for your baby. ((Technically your last name can be Smith, Dad's last name be Jones, and baby's last name be MacGregor... whatEVER you write in becomes his legal name)). I chose to use dad's last name as we were still together (I would NOT have, had we been broken up. If we'd gotten back together and married, then the name can be changed then along with mine), and several years later married kiddo's father, and what I learned from having both a different and same last name from my son is this:

If I ever get divorced I'm keeping my married name, so that I share my last name with my son.

An "in between" option... give your son 4 names so that dad's last name is his 2nd middle name, or use dad's last name as a middle name.

He can sign it. I think the baby should have your last name.

He can sign the birth certificate no matter how old he is as signing it is a way of acknowledging paternity. He'll probably have to sign another form as well to acknowledge paternity. Admitting paternity is not the same as entering into a contract. If he couldn't sign it, then neither could all those other underage parents that are in the US. As far as the last name, give the kid whatever last name you want. My friend ended up giving her daughter her last name when her and the father split. She did it because she was secure that she would have the relationship with her daughter but wasn't sure about the father (they ended up having to go through DNA testing because two weeks after the baby was born he decided to all of a sudden deny her. To bad it was really his like she said all along!). I am giving my son his last name because we are still together and have a pretty secure relationship. Do know that you never know how the father is actually going to be once the baby does get here. I hate to sound like I'm judging on his age, but he is still really young. It is a good sign that he says he wants to be there for the baby now, but really you never know. But, if it's not important to you and it is to him, then give him his last name.

I think long term so I think I would want the baby to have the daddy's last name. If she needs to track him down for medical reasons and such or other family members. Stay in contact with his parents if that is an option. Your child needs to know where they came from even if the picture now is "ugly" You can still care for the child even if the dad comes and goes at his expense. Don't count on him for anything and if he brings one pack of diapers in the first year consider that lucky. You will have enough to do on your own to worry about him.

Yes, the daddy should sign the birth certificate. He is the biological father.

I highly recommend you DO NOT give the baby his last name. When you child begins school it will be difficult for both of you, if you don't have the same last name. Do you really think that this boy is going to be a part of your child's life for a many years to come?

You should also have him acknowledge paternity. When he turns 18, get yourself to court and get a court order to make him pay child support.

I would call the hospital you will deliver at and ask them if he can sign the B.C. If he wants to be there for the baby or not, make sure he pays child support as well!

Chey,
You could check with the hospital where you plan to deliver; however, most hospitals in Texas give you the information to fill out and whatever you enter becomes a permanent record. They don't care who signs it as long as one of the parents sign it. It's not the signing that's a big deal, its if you name him as the father in the blanks for "father" when you fill out the info that will go on the birth certificate. You could do as one mom suggested hypenate the name, so the baby has your name and his dad's or you could give him the dad's last name as a middle name.

Pray about your choice. I have 2 relatives (single at the time) who gave their sons the dads last name and now regret it. My thoughts are the baby should have the mom's last name, if not married because the child doesn't have to hear the ugly little things kids say in school when asking, "why don't you have the same name as your mom".

I'm almost certain that he can sign the birth certificate (and down the road, it could be important to show that he acknowledged paternity), but I wouldn't let his opinion on the last name sway you. If you want the baby to have his last name, use it, but if not, use yours. As others have said, he's young and if your relationship is already over, there's no way of knowing how long he'll try to stay involved in the baby's life.

However, I disagree with the posters who said that it's awkward or confusing for the child to have a different name from his/her mom. I didn't take my husband's last name when we got married, and we have 3 kids, all of whom have his last name. I've never run into any problems whatsoever with having a different last name from the kids. It happens a lot - there are plenty of women in the world who don't take their husband's last names, or who have kids without being married but use the father's last name for the baby (not to mention the ones who divorce and remarry, while their kids keep their father's last name). So make your decision based on what you would prefer.

He can be on it... but your last name should be the baby's last name.. TRUST ME, you will regret it if you don't do that. My ex was the same way about our (now) 2 yr old daughter. She hasn't heard from him in 6 months. Thankfully in the divorce I changed her BC to my last name but the baby's last name should be the custodial parent's last name in case the other dips out. Have you taken baby classes? I was 20 when I had my baby, 19 when I was prego and they prepare you. Just build a lot of patience and no sleep tolerance.

Happy pregnancy :) Please put the baby's last name as yours babe, don't make the same mistake I made... "detached" fathers (not in a rel w you) are unpredictable alot of times.

I think it is terrible not to give this child both of your last names. I have an acquintance who has hyphanated the last names for her children so both parents are adknowledge. It seems to be the 'fairer' of the choices.

Regardless of your decisions, your child is not solely yours but also his. This child has a right to his/her complete ancestry.

Please check the laws of your state about the 'age of consent'. You could be opening a can of worms for yourself if he is under age.

You need to do what you feel is best for your baby. I suggest at least hyphenating your last names and not just giving the baby his. My daughter's friend didn't even list the father on the birth certificate.

Parents are parents regardless of age so yes, he can be named on the birth certificate. Depending on the laws in your state, you may or may not give the baby his last name.

I don't know. Call the county court house and ask the court clerk. Or call the Vital Statistics office, that's where the birth certificates are filed, they may know the proper procedure.

He can sign the BC but he has to fill out an acknowledgement of paternity first. My daughter had this issue (although he was 19) and the father did not want to acknowledge it so the hospital would not put him on it without the acknowledgement. He later had to when she filed for child support. They either acknowledge it willingly or the state attorney general will force a paternity test.

Not married then baby takes your name. It is awkward in school when you and your child have 2 different names.
This is gonna be tough for you and you will have to turn into a grown up fast. Time to start thinking like one.

Unfortunately, the father is a child and his parents are responsible for him. They need to give you financial support until he is 18, then he needs to start writing you checks.
Not best case scenario so good luck!

17 in the state of Texas is considered an adult. He can do anything a 30 yr old could. Except Drink and Vote.