Hi, I just read your post and my heart goes out to you. That is really a tough situation that you are in and I am sure that it breaks your heart that she is unhappy. I am curious about some things. My daughter just started school this year as well, she is in Kindergarten at Lithia Springs Elementary in Valrico, FL. Do you live in the area? What school does your daughter attend? I am my daughter's classroom mom, so I see firsthand what goes on in the classroom from day to day. We've been blessed - we got an absolutely awesome teacher and my daughter LOVES to go to school. It's not always easy to get her there because she is NOT a morning person at all. But, once we get there, she hops out of the car as happy as can be and goes to class without even looking back at me. Even in preschool she was very easy to drop off and loved going to school. I was very involved in preschool as well - class mom and volunteered as much as I could. I see that you have 4 kids, so that may be hard for you to do. I only have one, my little girl, so I have made it a priority to volunteer at school as much as possible.
Why is she being held back to repeat Kindergarten - is it due to social issues or has she had trouble learning as a result of the problems she is having adjusting? Could summer school get her on to first grade? I would definitley make her finish out the school year so she doesn't think she can do the same thing next year and get away with it. Those routines are so important to establish and stick to. I sent my daughter to summer school the summer between her last year of preschool and her Kindergarten year to a Kindergarten readiness program offered by the school just to keep her in the routine and get her really ready for big girl school. She loved it and I really think it helped her with being ready for Kindergarten and made her more comfortable with the expreience. By the time she started Kindergarten, she had two years of pre-school (not a daycare facility) and a summer of pre-K -- I really think that made all the difference because she is really a mama's girl. That is the only time we've ever been apart. And still, she loves school, learning and has been truly reading since just after Christmas break. Her whole class is on or above level. I would really take some of the other mom's suggestions and look into the school and the teacher and see what problems may be going on that you are not aware of and your daughter hasn't told you about. Good luck!