Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child BOOK Question

I have one suggestion for you. We recently went through/are still somewhat going through something similar to what you have described with our 15 month old. We have multiple issues to contend with, but assuming that nothing was truly bothering our little girl, our pediatrician suggested this method. When she wakes--and you know that she is truly awake, but not waiting until she is so upset that there is no going back--go in and stay with her for no more than 10 minutes. Our daughter went through 2 ear infections and is still getting 2 molars at the same time, so he also recommended that we give her Tylenol and Orajel to help alleviate any pain--obviously, if your daughter is not, then you wouldn't give her the meds. Follow your normal "go to sleep" pattern, then leave the room. Do not stay for more than 10 minutes; if you do, that signals to her that it is time to get up. All you are doing by going in is to reassure her that she is not alone and that you truly are nearby. She may cry again for a while, but we have found that it is more of a tired cry rather than an angry one. Each time she has gone back to sleep.

I hope that this helps you to some degree. A cranky, tired baby always creates a cranky, tired mommy. Good luck.

Yep, I know where you are. I was non-functional w 4-5 hours sleep too at 7 months. Sorry to say honstly, but you are not ABLE to cope because you are SOOOO sleep deprived. I remember the feeling and also how much better I felt when I started getting more sleep. SO, just for a week or so try to sleep when she sleeps. I know everyone says that, but at this point you could lay down at any time of the day and fall right to sleep, I know. Get yourself a little better on track, and you'll be better avle to help your daughter. Tell your husband you will buy burgers and chicken and he can grill for dinner and to please clean up after himself for a couple of weeks while you are healing yourself and your crazy mind. After a week or two you will feel 100% better. You will still have to deal with your daughters sleep issues, but maybe she will start to feel your calmness and adjust a little too. When we stay with them all day, they can really read our moods. You can't help anyone right now cause you are so frayed around the edges. I always looked at it like the oxygen mask on an airplane... put it on youself first and then assist your child = take care of you first (this time) so you can then tackle taking care of her.

I'm not sure if I have any real advice but at 8 mos my daughter took 2 one hour naps in the day. This is what her schedule looked like:
5:30 am - up for the day
6:00 am - breakfast
7:00 am - get ready
9:00 am - nap #1
11:30 am - lunch
1:30 pm - nap #2
5:00 pm - dinner
6:00 pm - bath
7:00 pm - lay down together for quiet time & nursing.
1:30 am - wake for nursing
4:00 am - nurse again but back to sleep until 5:30
At 17 mos - it is still similar (only one nap now and bed is at 8 pm - but she still wakes once to nurse at 4 am)

I dont believe in the CIO method for myself personally, I know others have had success with it but I believe you can still create healthy sleep habits without letting your child scream for long periods of time. I think that as my daughters mother - why wouldnt I want to answer her cries - if she needs me? And when doesnt she need me? Even if it is for comfort - why wouldnt anyone want to teach their kids that yes - I will be here when you cry and for whatever reason it may be (maybe this statement isnt 100% accurate - but its the impression I get).

I agree that we all need our sleep and we all have different ways to achieve this - so to each their own. My daughter sleeps through the night with the exception of waking once to nurse and goes right back to sleep with out any ifs, ands or buts about it.

I think if you are having such a hard time with the book that you are reading - it might be time to put it away. It clearly isnt working for you, I have said to others that - you should check out your local library first for "Sleep Solution" books - rather than purchasing them b/c at times it can be a waste.

I know you said you have tried all sorts of ways to change her nap/ bed time schedule but what worked for me when I had a sleep issue with my daughter was - at nap time I would put her in the car (b/c she fell asleep almost immediately) and take her for a short ride until I knew she was sound asleep, then I would bring her in the house & put her in her bed. Then at bed time I would carry her around the house & rock her b/c she liked to fall asleep with motion. Then put her down. Its a little time consuming at first but once you achieve a schedule, changing the methods can be a little easier, atleast I have found.

I hope you find some sort of resolution to this, for the sake of your sanity. Sorry this was so long & good luck.

Hello, L.-

My daughter has also been a "short napper" and has been in slow in "sleeping through the night." And it is frustrating when other people's babies sleep so much more, and more easily. Allow me to give my 2 cents on what has helped us- it may not apply to others, but it has really helped us:
1. You know the times that work best for her for bed times and nap times, give up and stick to them- don't try to adjust them each day anymore.
2. Give her a "bed buddy." This helped us- a blanket, and a little stuffed animal (safe for leaving with her alone- no small attached parts.) She reaches for them each night and nap.
3. Stroller rides every afternoon, and every morning. Make sure she gets natural light exposure at least for 20 minutes twice a day- will help to set her circadian rhythm.
4. Are you still nursing? If so- try breast compression- it is a technique- basically just waiting until she is pretty much done, then gently compressing the outer edges of the breast- helps to push out more of the fatty hindmilk (the stuff that makes them extra sleepy, and feeling full for longer.)
5. Turn off the monitor. I swear, I don't know if it is something about the transmitter in her room that disrupts her sleep, or whether I am more relaxed at night not hearing every little sound from her room- but we BOTH sleep better if we just keep our bedroom doors open at night. I wake up when she cries- but not necessarily for the playing around sessions.
6. Also- if still breastfeeding- watch some stupid movies. Seriously! Watching comedy, or just laughing, will make you fill your breastmilk with more melatonin= better sleeping baby!
7. Get yourself to bed earlier so you get more sleep- I am still working on this one myself, not easy when it is the only time you really have to do things- but you must for your own health's sake.
Good luck- I realize that these are not conventional things- but they have worked well for us. (everything still gets thrown in the air again when we travel out of town...)

There is a wonderful hour long CD of white noise that I copied from my sister. I put it in my son's room on continuous play. I will get back to you with the name I have to ask her. I do know that she got it at Barnes and Noble. I also have a thing that hooks on the crib and causes it to vibrate it seems to have helped my son a lot.

I read that book and instated its methods with my then 6 month old son and he responded so incredibly well, he has never cried in bed again...and most recently, he has slept through the night!! 2 nights! so maybe your baby is just wired diff. and if you have tried later and earlier bedtimes, I too would be at a loss....If she is not hungry or teething, i would be going crazy wondering...I wish i had actual advice on how to get her to sleep but one thing that I had to do when my son was a terrible sleeper was arrange my life so that i could go to bed earlier...If he went to bed at 8, i tried to go around 9 or 10 so i could get rest in too...He is much better now but it took some time. but if she goes to bed at 7 and you are only getting 3 hours of sleep each night, maybe try hitting the sack earlier for a little while. You will feel better! Good luck, and not that it helps, but this wont last forever!

well i read that book also - for similar reasons as you describe - and thought it was AWFUL! I thought the part about how much sleep babies need was educational, but no way was i going to let my girl cry until she vomited - as the author recommends!

I much preferred Tracy Haag - the baby whisperer solves all your problems. she doesn't believe in CIO.

best of luck to you & yours.

I definitely would let the little one sleep with me, so I could get sleep. This is exactly what I am doing with my 3 yr old grandbaby that I raise. It works for both of us. She is in a bed right next to(as in touching)our bed and she feels secure.

My friend and I refer to that book as the book we love to hate. I think it is a very scientific approach to something that is not scientific AT ALL! I value some of the facts in there, esp the rec'd times for periods of wakefulness and have had some success with incorporating his info into my own techniques. I am not someone capable of letting my baby cry so I am biased here but I just don't like his matter-of-fact thinking - as if all babies/moms are alike. Anyway, I'd strongly suggest checking out a book called The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. I have just started incorporating her ideas and have seen some positive changes already (only 1 week in).