Having Major Sleep Issues with Two Year Old.....

Updated on May 11, 2010
D.L. asks from Novato, CA
7 answers

I have twin boys who are 27 months. One of them has become a nightmare about sleeping. He wants me to stay in his room with him until he goes to sleep which I have stopped doing in the last few nights. My husband is putting them down after I say goodnight and leave the room. Sam wakes several times a night calling for me telling me to wake up etc. I have, I admit, put him into bed with me a few times but do not want this to be the case. Last night he cried two times and I let him. he went back to sleep until 5am. At this time, I am worried he will wake his brother, which he did. So, I went in and now both of them are asleep on the couch. But I have been up since 5am because I could not go back to sleep. I have been sleep deprived for 27 months and wonder how many years this will continue for. Any advice would be welcome. BTW, I did sleep train them at 8 months and Sam just two months slept great in his crib usually until at least 6 am. I should also mention though that his speech development is exploding right now....

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E.L.

answers from Atlanta on

I agree with the first reply--My daughter turned 2 on 4/24 and we have a good night time routine. Bath, Brush teeth, Short leg massage--she loves lotion, ik. then about 20 minutes of cuddling, books and singing then its lights out. She knows what to expect every night and she usually tells me to she's ready to go night-night towards the end. That has worked really well for us, i hope that helps.
Separation anxiety is common at this age too--that might be a part of the issue too. Good luck and I hope you get some good sleep soon!

E. S
Helping Moms work from home
www.keepingmyfamilyfirst.com

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L.P.

answers from Denver on

Hi there, we are in the same boat but with only one 2 year old thank god! Our son won't got to sleep unless someone lays with him until he's out then wakes at least once a night and comes in our room wanting us to come sleep with him and he's up between 5 and 6 so I feel your pain...I'm considering a child lock or gate on the door and just asked for advice on that because I'm out of other options, we have tried and I'm not sure if you have but putting him back in bed without talking to him every time he gets up but that gets old when you do it at least 10 times for months now. so I wish I had more advice but we are hoping it is a faze and it might be for you. Just know you are not alone and like others have said, you almost have to do what you have to do to get some sleep!! Email me if you want to talk about it :)

L.

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H.A.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi there,

I have a feeling you might not like my reply... but here's what we do. I do lay down with my daughter (33 months) in her bed until she falls asleep. We cuddle and it's great. Usually she sleeps through the night in her own bed after that. If she wakes up early in the evening, then I'll go to her and give her a snuggle until she falls asleep. If it is closer to morning (and I'm feeling lazy!) then I bring her to our bed. She sleeps until 7:00. (she used to sleep longer, but we just moved and haven't put curtains up to block the sun yet!)

Sometimes before she goes to sleep she says, "If I need you, I'll say 'Mommy Daddy!' and you'll come get me right away". I think just knowing that we WILL go to her if she needs us gives her the security to sleep in her own bed all night. It's working well for us. We are all getting enough sleep, and some extra cuddle time which I love. She is growing up so fast, pretty soon she won't want to be close to us anymore, so I'm really enjoying it now!

I should also mention, we had lots of sleep battles in the past. But when we decided to just be there for her instead of forcing her to sleep alone, she gradually started to sleep on her own. I was scared that if we "gave in" then she would be less and less independent. But it has actually worked the other way around. The more she knows we're there, the more independent she is.

Anyway, just thought I'd suggest something different.

Good luck and sweet dreams!

H.

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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

You may have hit on the answer yourself, when kids are developing a skill, like speech, they may have difficulty sleeping. Nerulogical development is funny that way.

One of our children had developmental issues, and had a great deal of difficulty with sleeping and separating from me. Our solution (after trying everything else) and it is not ideal, was to make her a palat on the floor next to our bed, that she could sleep on if she had to, but we did not let her sleep in our bed. We tried not to make it too comfy, and made it a last ditched solution, because I needed to sleep and she was 3. She now sleeps in her room, or on the couch (sleep is still hard for her) but she has grown into her own habbits and we have our bedroom back.

I would say, try all the convential advice, if it does not work after a good try, do what you need to to get some z's and don't feel guilty about it.

M.

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K.P.

answers from Seattle on

I went through the same thing with my son(who is now 5) and my daughter (who is 3). It took me awhile to figure out that they both just wanted more cuddle time before bed. I started getting them ready for bed earlier and having them pick out books for me to read. Then we would cuddle on the couch and read two to three books. Then I wpuld go tuck them into bed and read the last book to them.

I know it is hard to not stay in there with your child when they want you to but you are doing the right thing. It will get better and you will get sleep again. Stay strong!

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T.R.

answers from San Francisco on

I am with Kay. I would have my daughter lay down in her bed, but I usually sat on the floor next to her bed and I would read 3 or 4 books to her. She would usually fall asleep as I was reading. When she started school and was learning to read, she would read the first book to me, then I would read to her. This not only helped with her sleeping habits but her reading developement. She is now 9 and we still read together almost every night. That is our bonding time. Reading is her favorite past time. She can't get enough of it. But now we are reading books that we are both interested in. Her reading skills are very advanced for her age. She is in the 3rd grade but reading on a 10.9 grade level. I believe that reading to her when she was younger has helped in more ways then just developing sleep habits.

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A.A.

answers from San Francisco on

As a mom, auntie and a pediatric nurse, I am wondering if you realize you are the MOM! Have you tried being consistant with sleep training? Sleeping and putting yourself back to sleep is a skill, like walking, using a spoon and potty training.

Be tough, consistant, and have a family agreement where all of the adults in the home agree to the same game plan. You cannot do it alone. Your kids are old enough to sleep alone for 10 - 12 hours. NO snacks, no water, no mommy I need you unless ill.

There are several good books about sleeping, check with your pediatrician and see which one he or she recommends.

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