Hard Decision to Make About Our Family Pet

Updated on September 30, 2009
S.G. asks from Lakeland, FL
45 answers

We have a small dog he is 9yrs old. I dont know how many that is in doggie years.He is sick. He has heart worms and they are too far gone. He passes out or he will fall to the ground and doggie cry for a little bit then he will get up and be himself.This has been happening for a while now, at first it was maybe once in a while and now it starting to be more frequent.I want to put him to sleep so he wont suffer.My family wants him to live to his last dying day.When i was 9yr old i saw my dog die in a long painful death.My family didnt have the money to put the dog to sleep. So i have a problem on my hands i dont know what to do.Should i have him put to sleep, so he wont suffer or let him live till he dies on his own?

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M.S.

answers from Miami on

My heart goes out to you. I wouldn't wish that decision on anybody. If the dog is in pain and discomfort (and there is no chance for recovery) it may be time to let go... My parents had to put their dog down 2 years ago. My Mom said she held him when they injected the needle and he drifted off to sleep... At least it is not a painful process.

I wish you the best of luck whatever you decide.

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T.A.

answers from Orlando on

I only offer my advice because you have requested opinions. This is a touchy and sensitive subject, however if it were me I would humanely euthanize him. I think if you explain how he is not living a happy life now and how he is dying, then perhaps they will understand that it is in the best interest for him to be in a better place. I hope this helps, and my heart goes out to you.

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S.M.

answers from Miami on

I think you should put him to sleep. Its not fair that the dog should suffer so much and it might be more traumitizing to the family to see him suffer a horrible death.

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K.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

My small dog got suddenly very ill in May. He was also 9. He started having seizures, walking into walls like he was blind, lost complete control of his bodily functions. He would walk around and be going to the potty while walking, but seemed to not realize it.

It came out of nowhere. I spent almost $1000 trying to save him, but it would cost thousands more to really find out what was going on and then treat it...without much guarantee that it would actually work. In the end, his decline was drastic. His last night was so awful. At about 3am he went into awful convulsions, seemed blind and terrified and vomitted violently and emptied his bowel/bladder without any control. He just laid there in that state because when I tried to touch him, he would freak out in complete terror. He didn't know who I was. I made him a cushy bed and let him be.

That night seemed to last forever. First thing in the morning, I took him to the vet to have him put down. They gave him a shot to calm his nerves. He was completely relaxed and peaceful finally. I said my good-byes and was able to hug and pet him. They injected the pink stuff into a vein and he got very peaceful, still and relaxed. His face went back to the normal dog face I knew instead of the terrified, pained and sick one it had been for awhile. From the time of injection, he was at peace in under a minute. It was very peaceful and not at all traumatic. Watching him suffer was traumatic, watching him get peaceful and out of pain was not. I am very glad that my last image of him was his happy dog face & not his terrified, suffering dying face.

I am very sad, but death is inevitable. In hindsight, I wish I had had the strength when he first fell ill. His hospitalization, illness and expense was tough on the whole family... and in the end it was all for naught.

Just keep in mind that if you let him go "naturally" the end is very awful... and you will probably have him put down at that point so drawing it out does nothing for anybody. One word of caution... start thinking and researching now what you want done with the remains. Having them creamated can be costly, having them in the backyard can seem gruesome to some but loving to others, and the vet can keep the remains for you but find out what they do with them. Sometimes they are put into landfills, other times they are "rendered" which means recycled but you'll need to research that on your own... I don't have the heart to tell you about that here. But this decision caught me off guard and I wasn't as prepared to make it as I would have liked.

After we put him down, we said goodbye and planted a tree for him in the backyard. That makes me feel like he's still with us and part of the family. I am sorry for your loss, but try to focus on his good years. Letting go is hard. If you're not going to treat it or if it's not treatable, you need to do the right thing. Just like he's counted on you to take care of him all these years, he's counting on you not to let him suffer.

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J.C.

answers from Tallahassee on

This is really hard, but you need to do the right thing for your dog and let him go with the least amount of pain as possible. I know it is extremely difficult, but I had to let my 15 year old dog go earlier this year because of severe seizures. She was in pain and it was the right decision. If I had waited to let the process happen naturally, it would have been for my own selfishness and not for her. The vet was extremely kind during the process and it happened fast and painlessly for my dog. I feel horrible for you, but it sounds evident that your dog is ready to go. Google "rainbow bridge". It is a sweet story about pets after life.

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D.E.

answers from Sarasota on

I am a Vererinarian Technician and I have seen quite a few dogs with Heart Worm. The best thing for you and your family is to put him to sleep. It is a long and painful death, not only to you but to your family for watching him suffer. My best suggestion is to pur him to sleep. Also for future knowledge....It is preventable. Put your dog on Heart Guard 12 months of the year. Keep Advantix on him 12 months of the year. Please do not let your dog suffer, it is very painful to him. Just ask your veterinarian, I am sure he/she will tell you the same thing. Also DO NOT listen to the advise of eating tobacco. It is called HEARTWORMS, a dog can not throw up worms that are in the heart. Tobacco will posion your dog.

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J.K.

answers from Gainesville on

Go to your vet and ask about a rescue group in your area that might take him and treat him. Depending on the severity, heartworms can be treated. You would give up your dog but he might get the treatment he needs.
If they say he won't survive the treatment then my gauge for putting a dog down is when they are suffering more than they are enjoying life. You will know when it is time.
And small dogs can live quite long lives, often 16 years or more, with proper care. Heartworm preventative isn't that expensive if you ask your vet about alternative ways to medicate if you can't afford Heartgard.If you can afford Heartgard, it's about $9 a month, great, but you have to buy a lot at a time and I get that it's hard for some people. You can get generic ivermectin from a feed store cheaper, but be SURE to talk to your vet before you take this route. Not getting preventative medicine shortened your dog's life by a lot.

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J.K.

answers from Boca Raton on

It's about the dog and that dog should not have to suffer. Please put it to sleep.

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D.R.

answers from Daytona Beach on

Yes, it was hard decision.

I put my 15 years old cat to sleep for few health issues few months ago. I had him since he was kitten. My vet forced to put my horse sleep fast bec of major broke bone in hip which alot of painful. she was outside and run on field then suddenly snapped bone in her hip. It was vet's choice I have had no choice under Mass. Law
One day after x-mas, I took my husband's dog to animal hospital when dog had a stomach twist cause bloat. Vet told me 2 choices first, go ahead surgery to fix stomach which cost us $1,600 or second, put him sleep cost us $160. I asked Vet to take dog home. Vet said "NO" bec thats cruelty when dog was in serious pain. I had no choice and let Vet put him sleep.

There is law in some States, if you let dog suffer and pain. if animal officer find it out then they might charge u for neglect and cruelty to animal.while animals are in pain.

Your dog has heart worm which is late stage, difficulty to get up, etc... I hate to say that If it was mine I would put him down without suffer, just let him go and peaceful.

good luck
D.

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J.L.

answers from Tampa on

We keep them around for our comfort, but we also need to think of their comfort level. He seems to not be doing good from what you described.
If you decide it is best to put him to sleep, the humane society is the least expensive.
Keep in mind, don't take him on a weekend, try and get there as soon as they open. Otherwise you may have to wait, like we did, and that is agonizing. You will be waiting outside with others dropping off strays, etc. But if you get there very early or call ahead so they expect you it is very smooth. They truly care and are very kind to you and your pet in those final moments.
Good Luck
J.

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A.M.

answers from Sarasota on

Such a sad situation, I'm so sorry.
I made the decision to put my 1st pup to sleep last November. She was blind, deaf and had terrible arthritis and that wasn't the extent of her issues!
It was so sad and difficult to make that appointment and bring her to the vet, but I knew her quality of life was horrible. I understand your concern for your childrens' feelings and would encourage you to use this as a great lesson of being humane and loving to the animals in our care. Talk it over with your vet to make sure you are confident in your decision and then you can tell your family it was the vet's recommendation.
Best of luck,
I know my little pug Olive will be happy to have a new playmate in heaven!

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D.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

You dont say who in the family wants him to live. If its children, they cant possibly understand the levity of their decision regarding this and how much the animal can suffer. Personally, I am all for euthanasia and think keeping an animal (or human, for that matter) alive for our own personal reasons while they are the ones who suffer in pain is the worst thing to do. If its the children that dont want him put down, simply have them removed from the house for the day, have the dog put down, and explain that he died. If its an adult, give them explicit literature regarding the angonizing pain of heart worms and see what they feel after that. Good luck.

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J.C.

answers from Tampa on

im feel so much compassion for the pet. if you know anything about heart worms you would understand the kind of suffering the baby is doing. im sorry i disagree with your family and strongly agree with you, why dle the poor baby suffer. good luck and GOD BLESS J.

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K.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

Put him to sleep, S.. Your vet will help you talk to your family about the humane thing, the right thing.

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K.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

If you "really" think there's nothing medically left to do, the "humane" thing is to put him down.. I went through this almost 2 years ago and it was BY FAR the HARDEST decision I've EVER had to make!!!!! Ask yourself " how is his quality of life" and if your answer is not good, then you know in your heart what the right thing to do is...
I kept my 14 year old dog on meds for the last year of his life and in a diaper... It just got so out of control because he was falling over, peeing through his diapers, etc I knew it had to be done... If you decide to put your beloved dog down, spend a few days videotaping him, giving him all the yummy foods he would of ALWAYS wanted, if he likes riding in the car do that, do ANYTHING he always loved.. That's what I did with my Beau before I put him down...I cried and cried every step of the way :0(
And if you do decide to put him down, PLEASE be with him until the end.. As HARD as it is, your voice is that last thing he/she will hear.. (there hearing is the last thing to go, I read about it and that made my decision to go in with him).. It was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO very hard for me to go in and I cried hysterically but knowing that I was by his side whispering in his ear until the end made him know I will always be with him...
It still makes me cry but you can't let your dog suffer..
Your in my thoughts! let us know what you decide.

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J.N.

answers from Orlando on

I feel for your situation, as I have also been there. But you said yourself how horrible it was to watch your dog suffer as a child, and it would be equally that kind of memory for your children. When I was a child, my mom taught me that we take on a responsibility in caring for a dog, and that dog relies on us to help them in their darkest hour and make a decision when the time comes to help THEM...not US. It sounds like your dog is in a lot of agony, and I think you know what you have to do. Also, I know the ASPCA of Seminole and Orange Counties handle that and only ask for a $25 "donation" if you are able. Best of luck to you and your family.

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K.N.

answers from Miami on

Dearest S.,
Good day, I see you are really in a difficult situation with your pet! We had a beautiful dog, a Dalmation when my son was in his early teens! We had, Java, for about 6 years, but he had a thyroid problem, and he just grew and grew weight wise! He was suffering a lot because it got to the point he could no longer walk. We all loved this dog! But my son and I discussed this situation in full. It was my sons' pet. We agreed after a long discussion on how he'd want us to be responsible and stop his suffering, so we made the painful decision to do what HE'D WANT! Relief from all the pain! As a family we took him to the humane society; and they agreed, he was in too much pain! We consoled ourselves with the knowledge we stopped his suffering! He is alive in our hearts & memories always!Please try to have the same talk with your family! Allow your pet to no longer suffer! They feel pain, just as we do, and they can feel the LOVE as we do! May God give you the strength to do what needs to be done! God bless you all..
Truly,
Kathy N.

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M.S.

answers from Lakeland on

Eventually the spells he has where he falls to the ground will become more and more frequent, and he won't have much quality of life left. I imagine that soon he'll even have trouble getting around at all. Your family might change their mind once they see him suffering. You might want to check with your vet, and see what he recommends. He could probably tell you how his disease will progress, and what lies ahead for him. It's probably hard for your family to consider putting him down now because he seems normal most of the time, with only occasional bouts of illness. Once he gets worse, they may decide they don't want to see him like that and agree to have him put down. Good luck with whatever you decide, and I know it's a very difficult decision.

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R.W.

answers from Tampa on

My Dad used to cure our dogs of heart worms. He would force chewing tobacco down their throats. It would make them puke up the worms because the worms coudln't stand the tobacco. At least I guess that is the reason that they would puke them up. But for sure put him down. Don't let him suffer. I think it is very cruel of people who keep their pets alive after they become sick. It's hard but it is best for him. Just put yourself in his place and you will know the right answer. I feel for you because I have had to put two dogs down for different reasons. I also went with my neighbor not long ago to put her dog down. But if you love him you will do it. Check with your vet. Some vets will put them down for free if you have been a regular customer. Some charge $30.00. I also have been told the Humane Society will put them down for $10.00.

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K.R.

answers from Gainesville on

that's 63 in doggie years and yes he's lived a long filled life. I know your family wants to see him till his last breathe but you have control over that too..... they can all go off to work and school and he can pass peacefully at the vets office and you can tell them that he died very peacefully. It's not really telling stories to your children or loved ones. he did die peacefully in your care.

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A.C.

answers from Sarasota on

Our dog just died and she was 9 years old. The decision was taken out of our hands. she died on her own very fast. We still do not know what it was that took her from us. But she had lost the ability to walk with her back 2 legs and moments before the vet called to tell us to say good bye to Maggie ( our dog) we knew that if she could never walk again we would have to put her down. I know if we had to put her to sleep we would of given her the best last day of her life. Spoil her with steak and love her all day. She was the best dog. And deserved that. Her death came fast so we never had that option.
For your kids I think you should be honest depending on their age. I never really talked directly with mt 21 month old. I think they readily understand, she saw the dog was sick and we never hid our feelings from her. But since she cannot really express her feelings I did not want to frustrate her. If she could express how she feels I would of told her. But overall I think honesty is the best policy.

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E.B.

answers from Tampa on

So sorry to hear about your situation. The right thing to do isn't always the easiest. Let him go in a painless, gentle way.

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T.F.

answers from Tampa on

Im so sorry you have to go through this. I just had to put my 16 yr old dog down a month ago almost to the day our cat died the year before from cancer. He started having trouble standing & then seizures. It was the hardest thing I had to do but also the best thing for him as he was suffering & not the same dog we were used to soit was the best thing for him. Too many times we make animals endure so that we can keep them around a bit longer for ourselves. Our Blaze went peacefully with his whole family around him.RIP. Again I am so sorry you & your family have to go through this.

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K.M.

answers from Tampa on

Ask your vet- can he be helped? Is he in pain? I don't think you have enough information to make this decision.
It is tough- my heart goes out to you. k

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R.H.

answers from Tampa on

I would put him to sleep - wouldn't you rather the dog die happy than die in pain. I mean I really don't think it is even a question of whether you should put him to sleep but rather when you should.

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L.C.

answers from Naples on

I think you can put it simply for your family (and yourself): keeping him around longer is serving who's benefit? Is it helping the dog? (NO) Is it helping the people? (YES) the only reason to keep it alive longer is for the HUMANS to enjoy him longer because they don't want to say good bye. That is not fair to him.

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A.C.

answers from Naples on

Hi there, my heart goes out to u and fam. It's one of the most difficult things to do in life, but the main thing here is not to have him suffer. I also have a little min schnauzer that has major heart problem, and I know the time will come s when I have to face reality and put her down. she faints often, but bounces back up again and manages to go on. I think in your heart u will know when is time.. if u happen to see the suffering goes on and on, u should have him put down. I am so sorry. keep me posted please. best regards.

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J.M.

answers from Tampa on

I would put him to sleep and take away the pain. What if he bites your kids out of being sick? Tell your kids your dog lived a good life but now it's time to ease the pain. They will be sad but let them grieve and time will heal.

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H.B.

answers from Tampa on

The most loving thing to do is is to save your little dog from any further misery and pain. There are a couple excellent kids books out there about dealing with this loss. One nice one to save is Dog Heaven....

If your family wants to be involved you could all go together or select a vet that comes to the house. Take one of your dogs favorite blanket and/or toys to be with him/her. Be there to provide comfort and talk it over with your vet to sedate him first so there is no more pain, crying etc... If your vet doesn't do it for you automatically, get a small handprint clay kit and ask them to do a pawprint for you.... Or you do it yourself beforehand. You can make a nice Xmas ornament or something to save and remember....my vet did it as a surprise gift when we picked up the ashes and we are so glad.

It will be hard, but many things in life are. You are the one making the right decision. Explain to the others that continuing to let him suffer just so they can see him longer is very selfish....

Best wishes and I am sorry for your loss. Pets are very special.

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S.F.

answers from Boca Raton on

Hi. I had two shihtzus for 17 years. Towards the end they couldn't see, were hardly walking, not eating. It was just sad. I let it go on and on and finally realized that not only was it zero quality of life for them, it was painful for me as well. They'd pee anywhere, all the time, and I was constantly cleaning it up. I was frustrated and sad every day. I finally decided to put them down. One went months before the other. I carried them into the vets office, sobbing, held them while they injected them. It was sad but I knew it was the right thing to do for them as well as for me. Neither one of us was living life. It was agony seeing them be so frail, so lifeless. I miss them every day of my life, but I am glad they have moved on and out of those sick little bodies.

If your dog is that sick, do what is right -- let him move on and get out of pain and suffering. He is 9 and not going to get better. What is the point of having him suffer???

S. F.

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A.G.

answers from Punta Gorda on

I agree although it is hard, the right thing to do for the dog is to have him put to sleep. As far as the kids.... Maybe honesty is not always the best policy. Maybe you do not need to tell him you had him put to sleep. Today while you were not home, he went to sleep. You don;t have to volunteer that the vet gave him medicine to go to sleep. Sometimes we give our kids more information than they need. Sometimes we also allow themt o participate in making decission that they are not prepared to make. I am so sorry for your pain.

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E.L.

answers from San Juan on

I love my pets so much, for me they are family. I had a Yorkie who fought against cancer and survived, and she lived till she was 13 years old. But she didn't die of natural cause. She had kidney failure. Took her to the vet, she had fever, she was so weak. I only asked the vet if she had pain. And he answer yes and a lot! I just could not bear her suffering. He couldn't even tell me if she would survive. With great pain I made the decision to put her to sleep. Just to extend the suffering it just does not make sense. She was my constant companion but I had to let her go. I cried on a daily basis for 2 weeks. I miss her so much. But I understand that I made the right decision. Talk with your vet and ask if your dog is suffering too much, if there is shortness of breath or fatigue or any questions that you need to clarify. The important thing is that no matter what you decide to do, there should be no doubts whatsoever. When Poochie had cancer I decide she could fight it and she did. When she had renal failure I knew it was too much for her and she was in pain. It's a difficult decision but it should be for the wellbeing of your dog whatever you decide. God bless.

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S.S.

answers from Tallahassee on

I can certainly identify with what you are going through. However, it is really cruel, in my opinion, to let a pet suffer just so we can keep them with us longer. I have a 13 yr. old yellow lab who has arthritus. She is on pain pills and I don't think she is in any or much pain but I pray daily to know when the right time is to put her down. I don't want her to suffer. I pray you will do the right thing for your dog and family.
S.

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L.

answers from Miami on

It sounds like the poor dog is suffering. Have you spoken to your vert about it what is his/her opinion? We had to put our dog to sleep two years ago and although it was a sad experience (he was 12 at the time) I knew it was the right thing to do. If the dog's quality of life is no longer what it used to be and it is clearly suffering then maybe you should consider putting him down. My heart goes out to you and your family. Good luck with whatever you decide on.

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R.D.

answers from Gainesville on

Put the dog to sleep. Making him suffer through it is cruel. Let your family know that to put him to sleep shows your love for him by not letting him live to a slow, painful death.

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S.S.

answers from Miami on

S.,

I understand the dilema that you are in. However, the heartworms can be very painful to him. When my oldest son was 6 I had to put my cat down, he was 17 yrs old. It was a very hard thing for me to do but he was very sick. He wasn't eating one day and urinating in the corner the next, then all of a sudden he would be his normal self. It isn't fair to either yourself, the family or least of all the animal that is suffering this fate. Do what is best for him and don't let him suffer and let him be at peace and no longer be in pain.

Hope this helps.

S.

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C.H.

answers from Orlando on

I absolutely agree with you. The kindest thing is to put your pet down. It is very sad to lose a pet, but at this point it is just a matter of time. Unfortunately, your dog's future promise more pain and suffering before the end comes.

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J.F.

answers from Tampa on

Yes, please have your poor dog put to sleep. Our pets depend on us for everything and you don't know what kind of pain he is really in. If he cries, he is hurting and it is your responsibility to help.
Please have him put to sleep as soon as possible.

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L.W.

answers from Miami on

My parents dealt with this when I was around 10. My dad explained how Ritz, our dog, was suffering. If we let him continue to suffer, we were keeping him around simply for ourselves, that his life was no longer happy for him. He needed to be at peace. Thinking back, it was obvious he was in pain. We took a day to love on him and even let him eat table food. Then we said our goodbyes and my dad had him put to sleep. I think people often want to keep pets around because they think of them as people, it's easy to do. We would never condone killing someone who was suffering. And people have souls. But animals aren't people, they don't have souls. They do have feelings though, and letting them suffer is simply cruelty. That's my pov anyway.

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D.C.

answers from Fort Walton Beach on

What does your vet say? I have had to make this decision twice now and both times I felt that letting them go was the best thing. Painful for me but they didn't have to go through the long slow death that might have awaited them. My first dog was still young, only 6 years old, but had been sick for awhile and our vet had tried everything to give her a better life. She told me that I would know when it was time to let her go. I did. I used this same'knowing' the next time I needed it, some 20 years later when I had to make the decision to let our 16.5 year old dog go. Both times hurt me terribly, but they were the right decision for the dogs. I said that giving them an easy, painless death was my last gift to them. I held them both as they fell asleep and then died peacefully. No more suffering. I have a 5 year old dog now who will be given the same consideration someday in the future.

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T.M.

answers from Orlando on

Small dogs tend to live a good bit longer than just 9 years. So, while he's had a decent life, he has by no means lived his natural life span.

Have you made any effort at treatment? Using straight Ivermectin has shown to be highly effective and inexpensive. It's also very easy on the dog and they often show no side effects, unlike conventional heartworm treatment. Using Ivermectin for HW is considered off label, but rescue groups all over the country use it successfully since it's inexpensive and doesn't have the medical complications of other treatments.

I'd at least call my vet and give my dog a chance if it were me. Dogs don't have to die from heartworms unless you let them.

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M.M.

answers from Orlando on

So sorry for your pain. We lost our little dog after 17 years due to kidney failure...she was only sustaining herself while on an iv. We chose to put her down after the vet told us she was in a lot of pain. I would just talk with your vet and see what he/she recommends. I do remember ours telling us to be sure that if we continue treatment to be sure we're not doing it for ourselves.

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J.A.

answers from Jacksonville on

People talk about letting a pet die "naturally". Here is the harsh reality; if your pet were back in the wild, other animals would have KILLED it by now, because in nature the weak and sick are put down by other animals right away. Only in our "humanity" world do we let them suffer in pain until their little hearts that have served us so well just stop. If you truly loved this little pet, please don't make him suffer another day. Would he have done this to you? It truly is painless and quick, most doctors will let you hold him or pet him until he is gone. I know from experiance, it only takes a couple of minutes, they go to sleep and then they are just gone, no pain (for them, I cried but have no regrets). Good luck in your decision.

S.H.

answers from San Diego on

Have you and your family watch the movie Marley and Me. It's a heart-wrenching, yet wonderful true story that may help your family see your very sensitive point of view. I really feel for you. I recently had to make this tough decision for my cat of 14 years who had kidney failure and I had been able to extend his life for 2 years, but then took a terrible turn for the worse. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do, but knew deep down it was the most selfless thing I could do for a cat I loved so dearly. When we keep them around like this, it's usually for us, not for them. I think there are some great books for kids that talk about losing a pet, but I can't remember the names. Do a Google search. Maybe someone will post them as well.

With Sympathy,
-S

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L.L.

answers from Orlando on

First of all.. someone posted about the tobacco... My childhood dog growing up used to eat my dads cigarette butts..she would clean out the ash trays and also in the yard if he threw his cigarette in the yard she would chase it, shake it to put it out and then eat it. She was allergic to heartworm medication.. The vet said, by her eating the tobacco... that was a natural heartworm preventative...weird.
Anyway, I am currently going through a similar situation. My 13 year old shepherd mix has cancer :-( he's doing ok..just not eating much. My vet said.. to keep track of the "good" days and the "bad" days. Once you see the bad days are outnumbering the good ones then you know it's time to let him go.
I know it is so sad. I feel for you. I am going through the same. I love my dog so much... it's so hard. I think you will know in your heart when it is time. That is what I am going to do. You know, it might happen too quick for me to make that decision - but, if ... you know, if he starts going down hill and I know in my heart he is suffering... I will be sure to make that decision for him as hard as it is for me...
Good luck. My thoughts are with you .. xoxo

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