Guiding My Child in the Right Direction

Updated on October 07, 2008
J.R. asks from Bronx, NY
4 answers

Hello Everyone:
I'm a new member and I have been reading some of the questions. So I have loads of questions but don't know where to begin and which category to place it on. I have a 23 month old daughter and a 5 month old son. So far they seem to get along and she has been very loving and over protective with her brother. I noticed that my daughter has been speaking with three words and is picking up things very rapidly. She does alot of things that a 3 year old may be doing so I've been told. According to the pediatrician she's been considered advanced for her age. Since she's picking up things so quickly what kinds of things can I do to improve her skills. She knows most of her abc's and she is learning her numbers, and has learned some animals and when she sees them she quickly identifies them. She's fascinated with planes and the sky and also the moon. Its cute to watch her. I've also been teaching her some sign language at which she has pick up quickly and shows interest in learning them but sometimes she does some incorrectly. But she has the concept of it. I recently bought some videos from sign alot and she loved it. However would love to find more such as these but don't know where to find them so that she can learn some more. I am hispanic and also would like to start teaching her some spanish. She knows a few words and others she'll repeat it but doesn't say it clearly yet. I was told by other ethnic groups to just stick with your language at home because english she will eventually learn in school. I'm not sure if this is true. While I was out on maternity leave I started potty training her. She is already using the potty and sometimes tells me when she wants to go potty. However I haven't been as consistant as I should be since going back to work but she still lets me know. She's very expressive even when she's talking in her own language. Loves to mimic me which at times I find it amusing. Except when she back talks me. But I know she's only repeating what she sees and heres. I guess I need inprovement in that area. She know's most family members names and who they are as well as friends. She doesn't let them get to close to her at first. Which my mom tells me that is not good. But frankly I don't mind. The way the world is today I don't want her being to friendly to people she doesn't know. I'm very panicking about abduction etc. I guess watching to much lifetime and news can get a parent really shacky. I've been told that she is very smart for her age especially when they ask me how old she is and is around kids her same age or older. But as I read some of the blogs posted this is not really considered smart. I bought some puzzles to start with teaching and other stuff. I have loads of books but have not read to much to her. Just the animal books and some with the alphabets that contains pictures. But reading stories I have not. But when she is playing she does pick them up and pretends she's reading. Also, I am not sure why people say that watching t.v. is very bad for kids. My daughter has been watching sesame street which she loves and other educational channels and in my opinion as I watch my daughter I feel she has pick up alot by watching some of these channels. I'm not saying that she is watching television all day. Since she has shown that she likes to dance I recently joined a mommy and me class that teaches tap/ballet. At the begining of each class she becomes very shy and then slowly she will do some of the activities that the teacher is doing and other times she just does her own thing. Yesterday she did very well from begining to end. Is it too early to start her with this class?? My son is already turning over and loves to be on his belly and is trying to crawl but goes backwards. He loves to play with his toys and some of his sisters too. She plays with him and attempts to teach him as well. What other activities can I do with my five month old?? He's already showing signs of interest with all things. I think he's going to be a fast learner like his sister. Also do I need to start inquiring about schools now??? Are there any Christian schools in NYC?? I guess I will stop here with my questions. You can tell I'm a new mom. LOL

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So What Happened?

Thank you everyone for the great advice given to me. I will be doing some shopping this weekend. I began just talking spanish to my daughter and to my amazement she is repeating some of the words. So now when I speak in english I am also translating it into spanish as well.

More Answers

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B.E.

answers from New York on

Discovery Toys has a great product called Hello! Hola! Learning Phone that teaches English and Spanish colors, shapes, numbers and has 24 tunes. Plus they have a Bilingual Songs CD (English-Spanish). They also have a book called "The Potty Train" to help your child prepare for that milestone. You can find these products at http://www.toysofdiscovery.com.
You sound like a great mom whose kids will thrive if you keep doing what you're doing. Your daughter is old enough to hear short stories, and it's never too early to start cuddling that baby for read-aloud time.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.B.

answers from New York on

The great thing about your message is how excited you are about your children! I think the best you can do for your bright 2 year old is read to her, read read read! Much more imoprtant than teaching letters. The more variety the better, and if you keep trying books on different topics and at different levels, you will always be challenging her. I would say the same for puzzles, different styles, and different complexities. I can not remember just what my son was doing at that age, but there are 2 piece and 3 piece jigsaw puzzles. There are also puzzles that require less fine motor coordination that are kind of like the jigsaw type, and made of wood for little hands. With these puzzles, it is more like aligning the pieces so you can provide the mental challenge with out frustrating her with a fine motor task she is not ready for.

I don't really know much about early math, but as with letters, memorizing numbers has little meaning. A good book on this, "Albert Einstein Didn't Use Flashcards" could give you some guidance as to how to expose her to early math.

If she is telling you she wants to use the potty, you might consider taking her out of daytime diapers. Don't forget to make it as easy as possible for her to do things herself. (No overalls or belts, a stool or a little potty, stuff like that).

I would stear clear of TV as much as possible. Sesame street was developed for kids who live in very "un enriched" home environments. Though kids may be able to learn from TV (not under the age of 2 though, according to research) it is an inferior teaching tool, and of course involves no physical excercise, so important for development. Sorry, another book, "Buy, Buy Baby". Some very interesting information regarding TV, video, and advertising to children.

All the very best!

C.

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M.G.

answers from New York on

J.,

Whoa!! Information overload! :-)
We have quite a bit in common, but I'm a SAHM. I'm a latina mother of three living in the Bronx. I, too, am enrolled in an online master's (MBA) program. I will try to address some points you have brought up.

First off, congratulations on your newborn. To maintain your daughter's current skills and improve upon them, try the LeapFrog products that you can get at Toys R Us. They're fun and educational, and they have products for specific ages that will challenge them in a fun way. To enhance her interest in the moon and stars, check out the NY Hall of Science http://www.nyscience.org/exhibitions/explore_exhibitions
They have a preschool room as well. Your daughter will love it. There's so much for them to absorb, and the price is reasonable. It's in Queens.

Go right on ahead and begin speaking spanish to her. She will not become confused at all. I grew up in Brooklyn, and my parents had alternate spanish-speaking days. So if we wanted something, they acted like they didn't understand us unless we spoke spanish in the house. Clever. As a result, we can communicate in spanish as well as read it and write it. I do that with my kids now, though not as often. As time has passed, my preferred language is english, but I speak to them in spanish, and they'll respond in kind. I want the kids to acknowledge and appreciate their culture, as I'm sure you do too.

Don't rush your daughter and don't expect too much from her at this tender age. She's still learning, and she will come around in her own time. If you're concerned about her milestones (based on your description, you shouldn't be), discuss it with her doctor, but she seems to be on point, perhaps even further. You will be amazed at what she's retained by the time she's 4 years old. My 4 year-old seems like an old soul. Sometimes I catch myself actually negotiating with her----a 4 year old! Also, don't worry about her mimicking you. That's the ultimate compliment.

I think watching tv responsibly is not bad at all. Sesame Street, Dora, Noggin channel and the like are very good sources of preschool education. However, hours at a time may not be helpful because they do need the physical exercise and other mental stimulation--books, music, etc. You can even print some exercises from the internet to get her adapted to holding a pencil (Ticondera) or crayon and scribbling at first. Pretending to read a book is a good sign. Try to squeeze it in your schedule to read to her. It doesn't necessarily have to be at nighttime--even if it's a few pages.

It certainly is not too early to start her in the mommy & me class. I did that with my youngest, and she was the same at the very beginning. Stay consistent in going every week, and she will come around and actually start to enjoy the classes.

I started researching schools while I was on maternity leave. It's never too early to start looking. Set up interviews and grill them about everything and anything that you need to know about. Write a list of all questions you have for them, so you leave fully informed. Check your local listings, get referrals, and stop into nearby places of interest. Hubby and I interviewed a "Christian" school, and at the end, we finally asked for a brief tour of the facility. She paused a bit, then explained that she kept the Christian kids in one part of the building, and the rest of them in another part of the building. Not very Christian of them. Needless to say, we never returned. Things like this are better to know way beforehand.

As for your son, again, Leapfrog has products for all kids' ages. My kids attend a Catholic school here in the Bronx, and I am very content with it. My youngest is in the pre-school program.

I think I touched on everything. Overall, you need not worry. It seems that you're on the right track. Keep up the good work!

M.

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D.B.

answers from New York on

Hi J.,

Welcome to Mamasource, and congrats on your little ones! I joined this site a couple of months ago, and it has helped me so much!!! I'm sure that you already received some very helpful information and advice. As a Christian myself, I wanted to encourage you to pray through all of the concerns that you may have for your children. Of course getting advise and counsel is important, but pray also so that you know that you are being led the right way. What helps me when I am feeling anxious about my daughter, or overwhelmed is to give it to God. Ultimately, those are His kids, and He loves them immensely! That gives me great comfort, and I hope that it does the same for you : ) Enjoy the blessings of your family : )

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