Going Insane

Updated on November 17, 2006
B.M. asks from Aransas Pass, TX
13 answers

My son just turned 4 months old and he has been so whiney and nothing helps. He refuses to take naps and I feel that nothing is getting done around the house because he constantly needs attention or he will start to cry. After I feed and change him I will play with him for awhile and then I will put him in his bouncy chair so I can clean or eat and he will start to cry and whine all over again, I don't know what to do I'm going insane. I know it sounds like I'm being selfish but I just want to get things done. Does anyone have any helpfull advice.

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A.L.

answers from Lafayette on

What I've done with my last two children was to put them in a backpack carrier so I can get stuff done around the house. It makes them happy to still be near me and I don't get stressed out hearing them cry. Plus, its like exercise too :D And don't worry, its not going to 'spoil' him. You don't see my toting around my 7 yr or my 3yr nowadays :D

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L.G.

answers from Austin on

My 18 month old was & still IS the same way. I never used the bouncy chair. She wouldn't sit in it. Since she was a newborn I've worn her in a sling for a majority of the day so i can get stuff done around the house. She enjoys being close to me & we talk about all the things we do together. It gives her a great opportunity to learn about daily routines & the environment around her. I also was able to confidently & discreetly breastfeed her in public. I highly recommend one. Just make sure it's an adjustable ring sling. Those pouch slings aren't adjustable & don't grow with your baby. The carriers (baby bjorn/snugli) also leave your child with dangling arms & legs which really don't enhance muscle development. I used one & found that my daughter's go go gadget arms could reach things off supermarket shelves as easily as mine! With the sling she can be snuggled on my hip with her arms in or out of the sling. These slings allow the baby to be held in 5 other positions as well. I swear by them so much so that I started sewing them for all of my friends & to make a little extra income. They are a lifesaver! Best wishes. PS. I will say, after she hit 6 months & started rolling around & crawling things only got easier so hang in there! :) This, too, shall pass.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Dallas on

I would wear your baby is a sling or something. Babies just go through stages when they need you more. If you show them that you will be there when they need you, they will become more secure and independant. Also, some kids are just more clingy and needy than others. It is just their personality.

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C.B.

answers from Odessa on

I really don't agree with the baby sling. You'll never get anything done, your back will hurt, and your baby will ALWAYS want you to hold him and never learn to be independent. My son went through that a few months ago and i just made sure he wasn't hungry or sleepy or sick and if i knew he was ok, i would just let him fuss. I would just move him to a different activity every so often. I would set him in his bouncy seat, then lay him in his playpen to look at his mobile. I tried Baby Einstein movies and played with him in between chores and he eventually learned that he wasnt' going to be held 24/7. He's now almost 14 months and very independent and knows that i will play with him in a few minutes. I really hope this helps!

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J.G.

answers from College Station on

Hang in there sweetie it gets better. I went through the same thing with my daughter. You should try one of the baby carriers that you can wear, like a snugli.

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R.M.

answers from Houston on

Dear B.,

I know I'm responding so late - you're probably all set with your new baby carrier by now. : )

I've worn a lot of different things - Snuggli, Baby Bjorn, Ring Slings (padded and unpadded), ERGO carrier. My favorite is a padded ring sling, specifically SlingEZee, which comes in 5 sizes. Next in line would be the ERGO carrier, which is similar to the Baby Bjorn, except it is good for their spine (they're not hanging by their crotch).

Most people who buy a sling get a Nojo from Babies R Us. The Nojo claims to be one-size-fits-all, which is impossible for a padded sling. So they have trouble with back pain unnecessarily. Also, I hardly EVER see anyone wear a sling correctly - which, again, results in back pain. I've tried very hard to put a lot of good content on sling wearing on our website, if you'd like to check out those articles. Check the "related articles" area for more than this one...

http://www.nurturedfamily.com/baby-sling-problems.aspx

The best to you,
R.

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K.D.

answers from Houston on

Wow you could be me six years ago. Yep I did the same thing with a wonderfull baby boy. He'll begin to mellow out and take naps soon, hes probably cranky and needing attention/cuddling because hes tired but dosent want to sleep or cant console himself enough to sleep. My advice is to slow down even more (the housework will always be waiting for you your little one wont) and help him calm down by calming your self down (almost like meditation). This always works on my kids because if moms ok (not distracted or agitated) then they 're ok.

My other advice is to go outside and go for a walk, it gives you abreak and him something new to look at and the constant motion to help him settle down.

Good Luck! and congrats on a baby boy!
K.

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M.N.

answers from Little Rock on

Baby sling, definately. Just be careful with hot drinks or foods so they dont drop on him and burn him, also be careful of cleaners that are caustic or have strong odors, those kinds of things may have to wait until someone else can come over and hold him for you. It's just a phase, soon enough he will be over snuggling and it will be hard to get a hug or kiss! Be strong.
As far as the naps, how much sleep is he getting in a 24 hour period? Your Doctor should be able to tell you exactly how much he needs, also I think the "What to Expect the First Year" book tells you this. If he is really sleep deprived, Mom may have to take naps with him for a little while. You probably need rest too. God Bless

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D.N.

answers from Houston on

I used a Baby Bjorn baby backpack. you can wear it in the front or back and it allowed me to do a ton of things while still carrying my daughter.

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L.W.

answers from Beaumont on

Babies that are about that age can usually stay awake approximately 2-3 hrs at a time (more or less depending on baby). I realized my son was overly tired from being up so long and couldn't settle himself to sleep which led to a very fussy, irritable, and clingy boy. So, I would suggest making sure he's getting enough sleep first. Lack of sleep can cause more problems in other areas. Now, I can't believe how much my sons sleeps! 3 naps a day and 11-12 hrs at night! I was keeping him up too long between naps and he couldn't settle himself. ;o)
We teach our children how to eat, potty,and everything else so sometimes they need our guidance with sleep too.
Good luck!

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L.

answers from New Orleans on

I disagree with the other moms. Sounds like baby needs a general (not strict) schedule, and I completely recommend On Becoming Babywise, by Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam. Its a quick read, and when you read it, you'll think,"man, that's common sense -- why haven't I been doing that??" Totally worked for both my kids, who are and were pretty much laid back, and I'd take them anywhere. remember -- kids can and should be trained and taught how to behave. We owe it to them as parents, and it ends up preparing them to be good adults. Might as well start at birth!

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A.R.

answers from San Antonio on

welcome to motherhood! heh.. My daughter did that at that age and oh it was really hard especially being a new mother but it will pass and it will come again. She is doing that right now and she is 18 months. I do realize this can be very annoying but I think that when they are like this they have a reason and we just need to go give them the attention they want. I know my daughter is still young but she is such a loving little girl and I would like to think that me being like that when she needed me so much was part of the reason. I would really try to make it a point to get some time to yourself when hubby can help. Goodluck!

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T.J.

answers from New Orleans on

I have a 4 month old too :)

On her bad days I put her in my adjustable kangaroo pouch and wear her around the house. I have 2 other children and a home business to run...so I get all my work done, play with my other two and she is happy!

She also likes sitting in her exersaucer.

Just try different suggestions...I hope you can find something that works for you.

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