I'm going camping this weekend with a girlfriend. We used to go 1-2x year. My daughter is turning 3 in a month and I didn't go the year I was pregnant, so this is probably the first year in 4 for me.
I am looking forward to "me" time (and getting away from my husband, who has been making me nuts, but that is another whole post). I don't feel guilty per-se. I know many of her friend's mommy's travel a lot more than I do for work, and I know it is good to get some space from all the craziness of home.
BUT - this is the first time I'm spending 2 nights away from her, and I KNOW I'm going to miss the heck out of her. Part of me is excited, and part of me is HATING the idea of being away. It probably wouldn't be so bad if I was a SAHM, but I work so I really treasure our night and weekend time.
Just looking for an "anybody else been through this?" and reassurance, I guess. I always thought those mammas who were attached at the hip to their three and four year olds were a little crazy, and yet now I'm one of them!
Thanks to everyone for their words of encouragement. She dropped off at daycare without any real drama, and I'm looking forward to the trip, although I STILL have butterfiles. I'm going to set up a calling plan with dad, and I know everything will be fine. She loves her dad, and it will be good for them to spend some one on one time.
Go SPEND the time and become a better Mommy for it because you will be a happier Mommy. Everyone needs some ME time. Take it and enjoy!
Of course you'll miss each other, but you know what? This will be SO good for both of you! When I was in labor with my 3rd, there was this very strict 'no visitors' except dad to see you at the hospital because H1N1 and all sorts of nasty stuff was going around. I couldn't see my girls for 3 days and nights, and it was UNEXPECTED. I didn't have the opportunity to mentally prepare myself! So think of yourself as lucky that you both know what's coming and when you'll see each other again :)
What you're feeling is totally normal, whether you're a SAHM or WAHM, whatever. As I write this, I am taking care of my five nieces and nephews, ages 12 down to 2, while my sis and her husband are away for a few days. Last night my sister was just saying how conflicted she felt, and how she always forgets that's how you feel, how that will probably never change. But we agreed that, once you get to your destination, you relax and are glad you got away. You'll miss your daughter, but it will all be okay and I think you'll be happy you did it. Have a blast. (And really talk it up with her that it will be "special time" with whoever will be watching her--I'm sure it will seem that way to them too!) Good luck!
The last time I went "away" over night (Last year), I was a mess. I called home at least 4 times to make sure my daughter was getting her movie time and bath time exactly at 8pm....lol. I even called to make sure my son letting the dog out. I didn't relax the whole time I was gone. I did manage to get my hair professionally done for the 2nd time in my life...so at least I got that.
I have been trying to get away for a weekend by myself for the last 3 months and haven't due to the issues at home being covered "correctly". I have a friend who will take my 5 yr old daughter, but she lives 48 miles the opposite direction from where I want to stay. I thought about having my friend come and stay at my house instead, but she's allergic to cats and dogs. My mom could come out, but she and my dog don't mesh well so I would worry about the dog getting fed and let out. The last time we went away and put the dog in a kennel, she had patches of fur missing when we got back. My 18 yr old son is still lives at home, but...he's 18. So I guess my daughter will be going with me.
As far as feeling guilty goes, I know everyone needs time away and relax. I'm getting used to the idea that I also need that. I have been a SAHM off and on for the last 24 years and it's been all about the kids and what they need. I had a meltdown a few weeks ago and I got in the car and "took off"...2 blocks away. I sat at the park and cried for 30 minutes because of the situation, because I had no where to go, and because it was close to dinner time and the kids needed fed. I pulled myself together and went back home.
I know for my sanity I need to get away for more than an afternoon of running errands and paying bills...kid free.
My daughter was 2.5 when I had to go away for 5 days to tend to my sick mother. It was something I had to do - but I didn't want to leave her. But she was FINE without me. And it made my husband step up to the place a bit.
Go, enjoy yourself and have fun. I'm jealous that you can ever do it.
try to remember it will be very good for your marriage, and it will be great for the father daughter bond, so you're doing everyone a favor, Good for you
I also work full time so when my husband suggests a week vacation without the kids, I feel way too guilty to do it b/c I'd feel bad having fun while kids were home with a sitter. On the other hand, I have gone for long weekends away with my girlfriends a few times (we sometimes go to a spa place). And once, I just went away by myself just for some peace and quiet. Sometimes you just really need to recharge your battery and it is the best thing for you and the kids. And if your husband is staying home, your daughter will have fun with him. It's not the same as leaving her with a stranger/babysitter for a few days.
Think of it as an opportunity for some father-daughter time and you get to relax. Go and don't look back..... You'll have a BLAST!
Oh, and by the way, I've had to travel quite often for work. I was once away for 3 weeks and missed my twins' 4th birthday while on trial. Honestly, they don't even remember I wasn't there!
Trust me... once you're on your way and enjoying yourself you'll get over the guilt and the conflict. You have no reason to feel either. Do you think men feel like this when they spend time away from their children?
