It seems like I remember someone asking a question about having their name given out for references recently. I didn't pay a lot of attention at the time. I have received 2 phone calls now from an out ot town couple that is seeking sporadic childcare for times when they come into my town. The woman called and asked a few questions and asked for my references. I told her that I needed to meet them first. I tried to explain that I think it's rude to give out my daycare parents info to complete strangers. So she sounded put out a bit and jumped right off the phone. Fast forward a week or two. Dad calls and says that his wife thinks I didn't give references because of her accent. WHAT? I don't even remember that she had an accent! I explained to him once again that I don't think it would be right to give out names of parents over the phone.
Am I out of line? Isn't that kind of weird? For those of you with children in daycare, do you even want random strangers calling you? Or, would you prefer email? Is an email references less invasive?
Frankly, I only give references once or twice every few years. Once people come to me they either don't ask for them at all, or they have on occasion asked for them, but didn't call. Anytime a parent has received a call they are so surprised they call and tell me about it and always say they hope they did a good job LOL!
I personally think the whole thing is strange. I had a woman give my name out to be used as a reference once. Only she had totally stiffed me in the daycare and had been high strung and difficult to work with!! I was absolutely floored when I got the call because I wasn't going to lie for her. I told the guy that she stiffed me and was hard to work with! LOL.
There are a LOT of people out there that scavenge for names and phone numbers and have other dirty plans up their sleaves. There's no way I'm giving references to total strangers over the phone. They could be anyone. Meeting people for the first time is one of the sides to this business I don't care for. I open my door to people that might not have the best intentions. Once I get them face to face, I feel I can be a good judge of character.
Maybe I'm wrong and some people wouldn't care.
I am with you that you should meet with the people first so that both sides can decide if it's a good fit. Then they should ask for references. It's not like you aren't going to give them references that would give you high marks. When people can visually see eachother you can get a good or bad vibe and decide if you want the job or they can decide if they want to hire you.
I would get the CALLER's info and then give that to your parents who would like to be references. THEY can then call the other people if they choose.
I don't talk to someone about childcare until I've already talked to at least one reference. Just how it's worked so far. For me: I have a list of people that are my "running references"....my resume says "references are available upon request" and i have a list of references who have already given me permission to hand out their information (just name and a number, along with what type of reference it is--personal friend, former supervisor, coworker, etc). I'd suggest having a few references on hand, permission already given.
For me: when I was providing childcare, I encouraged parents (both) to come to the house to talk to me and my husband together as well. Providing in home childcare, I felt that I was interviewing them as well as them interviewing me. We let the kids play, they could tour the house, sit in the living room and have a little talk about how we do things, what are they looking for, etc. I always said "If you like, I can give you references" (noone took me up on it though; they spent time in our house, an in-depth conversation with both of us, watched the kids play, etc and knew by the time they were leaving). I suppose that my offer to give them references was AFTER our interviews though....I always push for people to come over and meet us as a family. If they need a reference after that, of course they can have some.
I'm with you! I applaud your choice not to hand out your daycare references prior to meeting the new family. A very smart way to keep those families safe.
Oh, & just as a head's up: in your last paragraph, to keep yourself legally safe....please just say, "no, I would not work with this woman again". Giving details such as how she stiffed you....can cause legal problems for you. Keep it as detail-free as possible!
In the 27 years I was doing childcare I always asked my parents if I could use them as a reference if the request ever came up. They always said yes so it was never a problem. If a prospective client asked for names, I was ready with a few who I knew wouldnt mind being contacted. That evening when the parents came to get their kids I would give them a heads-up that someone might call. What I found odd was no one ever called my references to ask anything. 27 years, and NOT ONE ever called.
When I am looking for childcare, I always ask for references, and I expect to get them, usually before I meet the provider, so that I know whether meeting them is worth my time. I would ask a couple of your best clients if you can use them as references, and then you'll know whether you can give our their names and information because you'll have pre-permission.
My daycare will ask the parents first before giving any info out for references. I like knowing that I will be getting a phone call or email
My sitter uses me as a reference whenever she needs to. But she always asks me first and makes sure to tell me the name of the person who should be calling. I think it's okay, but out of town seems a little off.
I'd ask a few families if they minded being references for you.
I also never give out references unless I have met someone first. I, too, am rarely asked for them,altho I just interviewed recently for my summer infant openings and both asked for references. I do believe they both took the time to call, but I never have them ready at an interview as I am so seldom asked for them. I will email them the next day after touching base with current families first.
Remember that licensed providers (here in MN for sure) are a listing of public information. Anyone can access this online. It really can invite some unwanted folks if you think about it. People who can assume I am home alone all day , vulernable I suppose, with a houseful of children. No way am I just willingly offering up client names over the phone to people I have never at least met.
Good call on your part.
i agree with you. i own and operate my cleaning business and i always ask my long time clients before if i may give them as a refrence and like you said most of the time they never even call. i wonder if ppl just ask for it to see if you will really give it. stand your ground..i believe your first instinct is best (;
If you are a provider, I would talk to a few parents ahead of time and ask if you can give their name and number out as references. Then when someone asks, you already have their permission to disclose that info.
I think it is ok to give the info over the phone or in person. I personally didn't want to call references until I was ready to hire the provider...if my gut was saying no, there was no reason to call. If my gut was saying yes, it allowed me to confirm.
I can't say I am the one last week that mentioned references but I know that I did mention it in one of my responses.
It makes sense that you meet them first. You may not want them as clients. It's a mutual decision.
I also like the idea of telling them you'll have a reference call them. This way the unknown person doesn't have any information.
Can't you just have your clients write letters of reference for situations like this? Either that, or, have the reference call the potential client instead of vice versa - takes the weirdness out of it.
