Hi Moms - is it wrong to make your toddler give up naps? My son will be 4 in Dec and when he naps I have to sleep with him and it takes 30 or 40 mins to get him to nap and he only sleeps for 1 hour.....right now.....I started making him stay awake until 7pm and it only takes 10 to 15 mins for him to sleep and he sleeps for 12 hours...before with the nap, he was only getting about 10 hours of rest (including the nap)...I would have to put him to sleep around 9:15 p.m. and it would take until 10 p.m for him to actually go to sleep and then he would get up around 7:00 a.m. --- HE IS Really difficult without his nap though.....will this get better.
PS MOST MOMS ARE VERY POSITIVE, BUT THERE IS ALWAYS THAT ONE PERSON THAT THINKS THERE IS SOMETHING ELSE GOING ON! NOT ALL CHILDREN HAVE PSYCHOLOGY PROBLEMS.
Hi, W.:
Get the book, To Listen to a Child, by T. Berry Brazelton, M.D.
What you are talking about is a discipline problem.
Your discipline problem needs some education.
Learning to say "no" is difficult for you.
I would also suggest for you to find a CoDA support group to learn to
set boundaries on yourself and your child.
Check the web: www.coda.org
Good luck. D.
I asked this question not too long ago about my 2 year old. My daughter took naps until she was around age 4 and a half. She is now 5 and still only naps when she is sick. So I figured my son would nap until he was at least 4, but at two he started to refuse to sleep, but was miserable and I had to put him to bed by 6:30pm, which is tough when my daughter was up til 9pm. It was tough for a while because he was cranky, and he still takes the occasional nap, but for the most part he no longer naps and he is not cranky anymore. He now goes to bed between 7 and 7:30 and wakes about 12 hours later. I still wish he would sleep more, but forcing him just makes me miserable and resentful of all the time wasted. I still will occasionally put him in his bed and tell him to lay quietly, sometimes he does, but not for long and then I tell him to play quietly, which also lasts a short time, then he gets up. I would say drop his nap and within a few weeks he will adjust and not be so cranky. You can try even earlier bedtimes for a while if he is super cranky, there were a few times early on I put Joshua down around 5 to 5:30 pm for bed. But now he is fine with the 7pm bedtime. I do not believe this is a discipline problem, you can't force kids to sleep, I have tried and it doesn't work it only frustrates everyone. Some kids need less sleep than others and some sleep differently, naps with less night sleep or no naps and more night sleep. Anyway, Good luck!
Hi,
Your situation sounds just like mine, except my son was almost 3 when it happened. (Now he is 3.) My son was never a wonderful sleeper, though. But for a little while, like you, I kept questioning skipping the nap because he would get so cranky. But it was the only way I could get him to go to sleep at a decent hour at night (and I could forsee that it was going to be impossible to continue to lay with him so long to help him fall asleep during the day and at night because I had another one on the way, who is now 3 months). He does still get cranky sometimes, but I have to remind myself that he had his cranky moments with a nap, too, and not all crankiness is sleep-related. I think it's more age-related! But it definitely improved after a week or 2 of the schedule. In the beginning, I think he was still cranky because he had been having shorter night sleep, so he was sort of behind on sleep. Once he caught up, it got better. So I say, don't feel guilty about stopping the nap no matter what all the advice in the books says. I konw they always advise not to give up the nap, but they're not living with your child. Also, even Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, which I basically can't stand, says that children's naps fade out after 3 years old. And I agree with you, I wish some people would stop trying to make people feel guilty instead of giving constructive advice. I guess her kids happen to be good, long sleepers, and therefore anyone whose kid doesn't need as much sleep must be a bad parent. I disagree with the idea that a child's sleep habits are completely or even mostly a discipline issue. These people either are lucky enough to have amazing sleepers naturally or they have justified letting their baby/kid scream by themselves for hours on end in the name of discipline. I guess they think adults who need less sleep or have trouble sleeping just need some discipline? I say just do what works for your child. But I think it will take a couple weeks or so to adjust to any new schedule to see if it works for you child.
Hope this helps,
M.
I am in the same boat as you but I have twins :) I am going to wait for the whole daylight savings time change to stop the naps. There is only a little time left for them to play outside after school/nap . I hate to take that away from them now . They really need the sunlight and so do I ! Good luck!
Sounds like he doesn't really need the nap anymore. I started making my kids skip their naps when the added up amount of time they sleep is less when they have a nap. My 3 year old twins are in the process of losing their naps. They do end up napping probably 1/3 of the time right now because it seems to catch up with them if they go too many days in a row without a nap (which I think is strange because they actually sleep less when they have a nap). And, the grumpy mood without the nap does get better - my 4 year old never naps now and only has the odd bad day now.
At two, my middle boy fought me taking naps. I finally decided that I was tired of trying to make him sleep so I moved up his bedtime and our life was much better. Your child is trying to tell you this works better for him. Yes, his crackiness will get better and you will figure out what 'quiet' activities he can do when he is tired during the day.
