"Should you really give money to a child for making their beds? Shouldn't they HAVE to do that?"
I'm right there with you, K1. This is why I keep allowance and chores as two separate entities for my five year old. I think we get into some weird motivation and power struggles if we are paying kids for what they are *supposed to* be doing.
In regard to allowance, we give our five year old son one dollar a week on Fridays. Only if he had damaged something and needed to pay back the cost would we withhold his allowance (if he's paying financially to make amends for something broken due to carelessness or purposefully. We haven't had to cross that bridge yet.). With this dollar a week, he is learning 'how much' things really cost, esp. when he asks to go to the toy store with five dollars and starts saying "I want to get this." My answer "Well, how much do you think it is?" He is learning that some toys cost far and away more than he has in his pocket, and he's actually made some good choices.
In regard to tasks he needs to help with, here's our list of daily responsibilities: (in relative order of our day)
Get dressed
Dirty clothes to laundry OR pjs under pillow
Brush teeth/go potty (before leaving house for school or outings)
Hang up his coat/tote (upon return)
Unpack lunchbox (if a school day)
Put clean clothes away (on laundry days)
Quiet playtime (yes, I do consider it a 'chore' for him)
Clean up bedroom/play areas
Set table for dinner
Put on pjs/ day clothes to laundry
Go Potty/brush teeth/wash face (bedtime)
hair wash (self care)
baths/shower
Recycling (on that day)
Put away groceries
Watch for crosswalk lights (because he needs practice)
Put away toys outside/cover sandbox (when finished outdoors)
(And there are above+beyond extra tasks to do if he wants to earn extra money. Today, he put away all the folded kitchen linens where they belonged, properly (correcting mistakes) and earned a dime. He gets a penny per flower for picking our dandelions before they puff out. etc.)
There is no financial consequence for not completing his responsibilities and to be honest, I really assess the day. If he'd been trucking along with me outside on a hot day (because we do a lot of walking), I might just set the table myself because he's tired. However, on most days, that consequence would be natural "Oh, we can't eat dinner because there's no silverware!Oops! Go make it right!"
Sometimes, the consequence would be time out (not cooperating with self-care tasks, for example); sometimes, if he refused to put his toy away, the toy would go away for a week. A couple times he fussed and whined so much about taking care of his toys outside/sandbox that they simply 'weren't available' the next time he went outside. And some things-- well, let's say he's not finished with his bedtime self-care tasks at the time we start stories.... then that extra time spent in the bathroom comes out of the 20 minute storytime we've allotted. Dragging your feet getting dressed in the morning might mean that the next few days there's no breakfast until you are dressed.
I should also add that he generally helps out a lot, and gets lots of thank yous for that. He's great at helping prep food for dinner, too.
This might seem a bit complex, but it is in this way that we keep the money (an allowance-- because he is a person with desires and so we let him learn how to use money wisely) separate from being a beloved and integral member of the family. The help and contribution that comes with his tasks makes our time as a family more pleasant, and *that's* the reward.:)
PS- we don't do dishes because I have old, antique dishes that I really like AND we don't have a dishwasher. However, he is selling some toys at our garage sale. Also, because his allowance is smaller, if there's a toy we think would be great for him ( like Capla blocks) we'd fund part of it; however, he's saving for a bow and arrow-- and we don't subsidize weapons, nor junk toys.