Gifted and Talented Program

I catching up on reading old emails. Your daughter is fortunate to be in the GT program. My sons have been thrilled with the program which provided challenges and peers who have similar interests. Of course, the program is only as good as the school and the teacher but we have been very lucky. Imaginative children are a gift to the program, as well as to you, for children are given many projects and opportunities to express themselves creatively. It's not that the work is so hard but that teachers don't have to teach repetitively and have time to extend the curriculum.

My kids benefitted socially too. In fact, that is probably my favorite thing about the program. My oldest was teased for the books he was reading in his base school. On the first day, he jumped off the bus so thrilled that the other kids had asked him about his book and that they were reading some of the same things. And, he is kind of competitive about everything he tries and he was thrilled to be great at sports with his new friends. My sons' friends have been lots of fun - they are very interesting young people.

I've seen girls flourish too. They don't fall victim to the playing dumb problem as they hit puberty. The kids learn to respect each others quirks and gifts. And the boys and girls seem to stay friends throughout and learn to work well together on projects.

As for failure, it is tough when you expect kids to earn all high grades and then they don't. I've gotten a lot better at letting my younger son take responsibility for his work. He doesn't get perfect grades but he is proud of his hard work. The teachers have a no nonsense, no excuses policy at his school. He forgets things but is learning to take responsiblity for himself. That is a great thing. I was still chasing after his older brother when he was in high school. And ironically, grades were higher in the GT classes than in high school where the material was not as difficult but was boring. So a little failure early on can be a great learning experience. Good luck.

Hi S.,

My 4th grader has been in the Ffx County GT program for 2 years and loves it. She enjoyed school before, but I now realize she was also bored and "coasted", not having to really push herself. She is challenged (and sometimes frustrated) but in the long-run, that is much better than her succeeding without having to push herself at all.

AS far as competition, I think that starts in the home. Our house is very laid-back about succeeding, and even the fact that she is in teh GT program, and she knows as long as she tries her best, we are proud of her, no matter what her grade. I know of other families where the grade is the most important thing, and I think that is where stress, and competition come in.

In my experience if she tested as having belonged in teh GT program, then that is where she belongs. You can also talk to the teachers/administrators and ask your specific questions. You're not the only one with these questions.

Oh, and one other thing, I found the amount of homework didn't increase, but her needing to be responsible for her own work/schedule, did, and that was a very good thing for us.

Good luck -- L., wife, mom of 2 girls, 10 (GT grade 4) and 3.5 (special ed preschool), part-time work-at-home writer

Hi S.! I was in your exact position one year ago. My daughter (now in 3rd grade) was eligible for moving to a GT school, but we chose to keep her at our base school. I'm happy with our decision. I spent A LOT of time last year talking with teachers and parents at the GT school where my daughter would go, as well as her 2nd grade teacher and the GT specialist in her base school. We didn't make our decision until after I had done all that research. The only person I didn't talk to was a parent who chose not to send her kid to the center. That could've been helpful, so please feel free to email or call me so we can chat more about it! ____@____.com and ###-###-####.

K.

I was in a gifted program when I was younger and loved it. It was from 3rd through 8th grade. I didn't feel any competitiveness until high school when people were vying to be valedictorian, by which time the program was done (substituted by advanced placement classes) I felt like I fit into the group and we got to do special things, things that were different from the norm. It was nice to have a change of pace from the normal classroom, which at times went too slow and was not very challenging. If my children have the opportunity to be involved in one, I will definitely be all for it, as I'm grateful I got the opportunity.

I have two girls in the FCPS GT program (I guess I should be saying AA program now.) My oldest (now in 6th grade) struggled a bit at first because she was used to everything being so easy and in truth got pretty lazy. She was not used to actually having to put effort in it. She now loves it and has a group of wonderful friends who "get" her because they are the same way! My 3rd grader started this year. She really didn't want to leave her old school and friends but came home after the first day and said "I love it!" It is not a competitive environment. It just allow gifted kids to grow at their own rate and be with other kids like them. 3rd grade is a bit challenging math wise as they compact 3rd and 4th grade math into one year but if your daughter enjoys math she will like that. Feel free to email me if you have more questions.

S., if you want to "talk" more, e-mail me directly. My daughter is in third grade and this year started in the Fairfax County GT program at a center, so we did leave our base school for the center. We've been pleased so far with the level of work our daughter seems to be doing, and with the teacher. I would be glad to tell you why we chose it, and I do know other parents who chose to keep their kids at our base school for their own very good reasons.

Be certain you do attend your GT center's informational night and tour, which should also be open to your daughter. This is the tour of the actual school, not one of the county informational nights. We got separate adult and kid tours of the school and my daughter loved what she saw and was eager to switch schools though she loved her old one. You will get a feel for the center, so be sure to go to that tour!

I could go on and on but remember a few things: A lot does depend on your base school's ability to challenge your daughter. Ours was a lovely school with nice people, some very good teachers and a great volunteer ethic, and it was hard to go, but we knew it couldn't offer her the academic challenges she needed, for reasons I won't go into here. Base school principals and teachers make a big pitch to parents to keep kids at the base school and will tell you about all the offerings they have for GT kids, but in our case, we felt it wasn't the same as having her in classes where the instruction was GT all the time, every subject, and where all the other kids were as interested in school as she is.

A lot also depends on the center, I guess, though you will have little to no choice about which one you get.

Also, you say you "don't want to set her up for failure," but S., that's negative thinking--you DO want to set her up for success, and that means challenging her wherever she is. If her base school can do that, that's great. It's a matter of your knowing your base school well before you decide.

And one other thing: You are allowed to enter her in a GT center any time once she's accepted, so she could start in 4th grade or later, BUT I believe that waiting too long can put kids behind. Acquaintances of ours waited until their daughter was in 6th grade to move her to a GT center and say she is having a tough time because she had five grades of easy, breezy work, always being the top kid academically without much effort, and now she's finally being challenged. Starting them in 3rd means they get used to the level of work and also get to make social bonds earlier with kids they'll see for years.

I'll add just one thing - so far at least the program doesn't seem to make our daughter feel it's competitive or super-hard. Homework is no more than about 30 minutes a night, if that much, and the teacher insisted that homework should not be more than 30 minutes. Our daughter does have more special projects than she would if she'd stayed at the base school and she sometimes gets stressed about that, and we have to work with her on planning her work, but she is learning to manage her time and work in advance -- which she MUST do in middle and high school or else. Anyway, contact me if you want to know more about our situation, but in the end, it's a very personal call.

I know you feel like your daughter is young for this, but remember, all the other kids starting out are also in 3rd grade. The first year of the program is designed for their age. My daughter is in the program in Loudoun County, it's not threatening because they don't get letter grades for any of their work, they get written assessments which are actually more helpful to me than letter grades in telling me how my child is doing. I think you would do your child a disservice by not letting her at least try. She probably needs the challenge and intellectual stimulation. If problems developed, you could always pull her out. Good luck to you!

You can learn more from the Fairfax County Association for the Gifted (FCAG). They have a listserv with parents asking all kinds of questions about the GT programs. Many parents on the listserv feel the GT program is not very challenging, and the quality/competitiveness can depend on which Center your child attends. The County is trying to offer more level 4 GT services at base schools, which may be less competitive and allows your child to stay in the environment where they feel comfortable. I think they tell you, or you can ask, what your child scored on the placement tests. If she scored high, then I wouldn't worry about her being overly challenged.