Getting Ready to Potty Train 2 Year Old Girl

Well, I can tell you what my mom did for me. I didn't have the patience to get him started so my mom started it, then I carried on after that. My son is now 4 but he learned quickly. I didn't potty train him until he was 3, though. Mom says girls learn faster and earlier.

So, this is what mom did...she let my son run around the house in his underwear and a lot of times, naked. That way there was no time to waste. SHe would tell me that once they need to go they need to go. She would sit him in the potty after the nap, after eating or drinking a lot, and heavy play. My son loved the reward if he went #2 (a chocolate kiss), but he loved the clapping and us yelling "yea!" more. He went straight to the big toilet...he didn't like the portopotty or the kidseat that goes on top of the toilet. Every child is different.

Dear J.,
My daughter was about 15 months when we potty trained, however it started the same way. We had both the potty chair and the potty seat. My daughter had no intrest in the chair, she would take it apart and carry it around the house. However she loved the seat. I think becouse she was more like mommy. We would put her on the seat dressed at first and ask her if she had to go potty. If she said yes, then I would take off her diaper and let her sit on it. Also I would tell her when I was going potty so she could see how I did it. We didn't reward her for going, but we did praise her every time she went. About two or three months later we told her that she wasn't going to wear diapers any more and we bought her some really cute panties. With the exseption of the few exspected mistakes she has been fine.

First of all... let me tell you, though there are books and people that claim that they can potty train your child in a day, or a week or whatever... YOU and YOUR CHILD KNOW WHAT IS BEST!!!

My daughter was three and not fully potty-trained. I was getting flack from my mom, my dad, my aunt, my brother, her daycare... and often, pressure from surrounding sources can be more powerful that what your instincts are telling you.

She just wasn't ready.

I didn't realize that at the time, however, and I pushed. My husband and I both pushed her. All it did was drive her away from her natural desire to control her potty-goings.

She had bladder control, we knew this because she would go hide in her room to pee or in the closet if it was number two (yes, her CLOSET!) when she had to go. She'd have an accident, then come tell us about it. It was going beyond frustrating. Now it was gross.

I was upset. This is my first child, and I felt hopeless, and I felt like I was going to have a 5 year old who pooped her pants in the closet.

What it came down to was her personal style of doing things. We had pushed her to do it our way, forgetting that she is at the age that she is becoming more independent and she often has her own way of going about completing tasks.

Soo... One day, I asked her if she had to go potty... she told me, "Yes, Mom." and started walking to the bathroom. As we got there, she turned to me, put her hand up in 'talk to the hand' form, and said, "No. You stay here."

She went in there, did her thing, and came back out. It was at that moment that I realized that I had done it all wrong. I had wanted it done my way and in my time. I'd forgotten what a strong-willed, independent child I had.

Since that day, we haven't had a single accident during the day. We've had three night-time accidents, but it's been some time and now she even wakes up at night if she has to go, does her business, and goes back to bed. Amazing. Leaps and bounds from where we where.

So, in my mom-opinion, what it comes down to, is pay attention to what they seem to want. Don't make the potty intimidating like I made the mistake of doing.

Don't set a date.

Just start, and see how she does.

My suggestion to you is that you keep her in a routine. Example: everymorning when she wakes up take her to the potty. After lunch have her sit on the potty; but for this you will need i portable potty. And before she goes to bed take her potty. What you are trying to establish is a routine that she will soon get us to. There will be occasions when she might say she does need to use the potty but having her sit there for some minutes still wont hurt.

My daughter was just a little younger when she started with the potty thing, but she started the same way. She would come in and go the same time as I did... She would put her babies on the potty ect. It was a play thing, but she was learning. She would tell me as soon as she went in her pull up. We used pull ups because they were more convienet for us at the time, but she would never tell me before she went. I wasn't ready either, I just kinda said oh okay lets change you.

She was at home with me most of the day as well, but we were out at play groups and commuted 2+ hours in the car twice a week. So I really wasn't ready, especially for in the car stops! Anyways, I just took the pull up off one day and she did it! There were a couple accidents, but within a few days she got it. I would still put a pull up on her when we went out, but she would go in it... So I stopped that.. Again we had 2 accidents (toys r us), but then she figured it out.

When you go out, ask her to sit on the potty (we counted to 10 while she "tried") before you leave, when you get to where you are going, before you leave where you are, and when you get home. After a couple weeks she got it. I still had to stop a lot on our long drive to go potty (even though I put a pull up on she WOULD NOT go in it!!)

At night I would put a pull up on and she was fine with that. Im not sure at what age they should be starting the night time training, but my daughter is going to be 3 in april and shes working on it... Again, I am not sure if I am ready for it.. waking up with accidents in the middle of the night, but she seems to think she is ready for it.

Some people use bribery, I have nothing against bribery. Just see what your daughter responds too.. We made up a party dance and when she went in th epotty we sang and danced all over the house, loud and silly! She loved it and I am sure it encoursged her.. For the night time stuff, its Jamba Juice..

Good luck!

The below response is excellent advice. My best friend "forced" the issue with her firstborn, even though her daughter TOLD her she wasn't ready, said she couldn't feel when she had to go, etc. Turns out the girl wasn't kidding. After a few years and several UTI's, turns out the kid had mild congenital nerve damage that made it hard for her to feel when she had to pee. Her bladder was damaged in 5 places from over stretching. Now, the kid pees according to a wrist watch. This is OBVIOUSLY an extreme example, but also an excellent reminder to respect your kids personal timeline for theses things. if they are not ready...

Some books claim to potty train over the weekend. But my understanding is they work better with older kids. Those moms that I know who used them successfully were doing it with 3 year olds.

I'm pretty laid-back and "no stress" about introducing changes to my kids, so right now I'm just introducing the concepts of potty to my kid without expecting performance. My kid has a training potty and like yours, he sits on it clothed (and diapered) and pretends. It's cute.

One DVD that my son seems to just LOVE right now is "Elmo's potty time." it is not so much a how-to as it is getting them to understand what and why, and being encouraging. Since my son loves Elmo/sesame street, he wants to see this DVD ALL THE TIME!!!!!!! So we dance around to the songs, shout "poopy," and have a great time.

And of course, now he is more interested in this whole potty business (wants to watch, etc). But--still not ready to give it a try yet. That's ok. I'm patient, despite currently changing two sets of diapers.

Hi J.! :)

I HIGHLY recommend using the "doll method".
I trained my son using a "Potty Scotty" (Potty Patty for girls)doll. Not sure if you've heard of it--but basically--you toilet train your child in 1 day by having them teach the doll to use the toilet. In teaching the doll, they teach themselves. It worked like a charm for my son, who was 2 year, 2 months, but he did have problems with the pooping thing (some kids just do I guess) until one time he went in his pants and i backed him up to the toilet and "flipped" the poop in his undies into his toilet. He was shocked and said, "No!! Make messy!!" I thought--ah ha! So i took him around and showed him how dishes go in the cupboard, clothes in the closet, toys in the toy box and then explained that poopoo belongs in the toilet. You could see the little lightbulb go on in his head as he understood. I've had no problems with him since. :) He caught on REALLY fast and we both had a really pleasant experience with the method.
Anyway, Everyone I know who've used it had great results (my mom even trained ME on it hehe) and it's a lot of fun too! I recommend doing a search for Potty Patty on google to see a list of stores or using Ebay. (I'm a fan of ebay lol)
Best of luck to you and your daughter on this fun milestone!

~M.

J., you've already started potty training. Take it one step at a time. I, too, felt intimidated by all the literature. I adopted and my daughter came to me at 6. She asked me about potty training and I felt anxious that we do it the "right" way. At the time I was babysitting and doing the housekeeping every day. But my daughter acted as if whatever happened was OK and she was successful with both of her kids with very little stress.

She started out getting my granddaughter used to the potty chair by taking her diapers off and sitting her there whenever she went to the toilet. But my granddaughter is also independent with a definate mind of her own. She put herself on the big toilet on her own. She wore pull-ups for a couple of months, maybe more, because she did have fairly frequent accidents, in part because I was inconsistent in taking her to the bathroom. Finally my daughter got tired of "this fooling around" and asked me to focus on getting her to the toilet on time and switched her to cotton panties. She was day time trained in a very short time. Night time took longer.

We praised the kids everytime they ran to the bathroom and then again if they made it to the toilet on time. We didn't make negative comments at all. If they had an accident it was "there is next time" or something like that.

Even tho he is a boy, it took less time to train him because we focused more on doing it. Watch for the signs, take him to the toilet. Stay with him, talk, sing until he pees, or whenever a few monutes are up. Several times during the day. Boring for me but we got it done. It really is no big deal.

A friend didn't do anything toward potty training until her daughter was 3 and she had to be trained for preschool. She was trained in 2 weeks. My friend put a potty chair in the bathroom, put it her on it a few times and after that she just did it herself. I think she gave her stickers each time.

Dear J.,

There are obviously different methods for potty training, but I would discourage switching back to diapers or pullups when necessary. It is confusing to the child and in most cases makes the learning process take longer. We had a 3 boy stay with us whose Mother had not potty trained because of the inconvenience of cleaning accidents. We got him some neat training underpants (a good trick would be to let her pick) and went cold turkey. We would do lots of reminders and "maybe we should try" and paid close attention to the time of day that his BM's were, then get him to the toilet about that time. We also chose to wake up in the middle of the night and help him to the toilet so that he wouldn't have accidents.

When you switch back to pullup or diapers while trying to train them they miss out on helps them learn. Part of learning to use the toilet is also knowing the unfortunate consequences of what happens when we don't make it to the potty, feeling wet and yucky. You've actually gotten your daughter pretty far, she seems to understand the process, now you need to help her follow through. The hard part is sticking to it, but with a little patience she'll do great. Good luck!

Hi J.

This may sound funny to you, but this is the advice my sister gave me, and it worked like a charm! anytime my daughter went pee(on the potty), she got ONE M & M, and anytime she went poo, she got TWO M & M's. I know people say that to reward anything with "treats" isn't good, but it really worked great. I also did this tactic. I had her be diaperless (naked) all day, so that she could start to "know" when she had the urge to go potty. We had a couple accidents, but it really got her to understand the feeling. She rarely gets sugary treats, so it was really special for her to get M & M's!! This "treat" thing fades out gradually, and she was potty trained quickly!! It was wonderful. I also bought a travel potty from "the Right Start"..its like a suitcase fold up potty that was great to take anywhere!! (car, stores, etc.)
I hope this helps, its wonderful when they don't need diapers anymore!!! My daughter was also 2 when she began to potty train.

sincerely, J. S.

When you set her on the potty turn the sink or bathtub water on, that helps alot. For #2 sit her for 10-15 minutes at a time with a book.

To help with the transition of diapers to "big girl undies", consistent reinforcement is needed. You have to ask her every five or ten minutes if she has to go potty, and if she doesn't have to go, then ask her again. When she finally does use the potty, praise this action. It should be some sort of prize for using the potty. Let her know that you are happy with her using the potty.

I use to take my daughter with me whenever I used the toilet even in the middle of the night. It worked for me. Good luck.

Hi J., I am going through the same with my daughter who will be three on 2/28. What I am doing with her is that while I am at home with her and the same when she is at day care, we leave her without a pull-up. At first, she was going on herself constantly. I would take her to the bathroom and have her "clean herself" up. (Of course I would finish). When I had to go to the bathroom, I would make a big deal out of it and take her with me so that she could catch on. It took about a week before she began. It was not all the time but we had less accidents than before. Now, she can do it herself and only wears a pull-up when we go out and when she falls asleep. Those are the next two steps of the potty training ladder. Most kids to not like to feel dirty or wet. So if she knows she will have to clean herself up, she will try her best to make it to the potty first.

J., I say go for it! Its not as hard as people make it out to be. If your daughter is showing you signs that she is ready then its makes it alot easier on you...trust me... My daughter is now 3 1/2 and she didnt want to potty train until she was 3!! My pediatrician said that was okay, because when a childs ready you will know. And as soon as she hit 3 she was doing the same thing your daughter is doing, and she trained in less than a week. I took her to the store after she got the potty training down, and bought her, her favorite pair of panties!! She loved it.

So good luck! You can do it! Just make sure you put her on the toilet every 2-3 hrs (consistancy is key)

God bless

My son is now 19 and my daughter is 9. I'm sorry but I laughed when I read your message ... I was so NOT ready for them to be potty trained and they are 10 years apart.

But ... this is my advice. In both cases, I read them the book "Once Upon a Potty" and ... WAHOOOO! My son was potty trained at 18 mths ... my daughter was later but ... it was 10 years and I think I was different. But ... both STILL remember the book and about sitting and sitting. Once you get it ... you'll get it.

I love this book and it's always my first gift choice.

Shelia Griffiths
www.workathomeunited.com/shelia

Dear J.,

Sounds to me like you have the right idea. I love it that she wipes. Too cute, and that also helps her want to use the potty. Good work. C. N.

I've been potty training my daughter since she was 18months old and she was always curious as to what I was doing. I just sat her on the toilet and she went. I would suggest just keep putting her on and tell her to go tinkle. Every child is different, but if she is ready to learn she will go. It will take some time to master it though. We are still working on my daughter.

hey J.,
i started training my son at 9 months, he is 13 months now and we still dont have it completely down, but hes still young. where i started was i know when any child wakes up they have to go pee. that is when i put him on the potty. it was really easy actually. he eventually got the idea that was what it was for. also, using cloth diapers helps b/c they can feel when they are wet.