Getting My Kids on a Sleep Schedule

This is an AWESOME book that my Dr. recommended to me. "healthy sleep habits, happy child". Sorry, can't recall the author off hand.

Wow, lots of good advice to start with.
My suggestions are first, TVs out. They have no place in a child's bedroom, period. Second, make a routine (toys away, bath, jammies, teeth brushing, potty, story, song, prayer, kisses, hugs, tuck in, night-night) and don't waver on it. Third, 7:30 - 8 pm is a good bedtime. If you start the routine around 7-ish then everyone will be in bed by 8. Fourth, shut the doors. Use baby gates, baby locks (on the inside) or latches on the outside. He can't run around if he's stuck in his own room. Just be sure it's toddler proof. Fifth, get him up in the morning. This will help to reset his internal clock so that he's tired by naptime (if he doesn't nap then enforced quiet time, no movies, no games, no running around)...just a quiet toy or book in bed (again shut the door). By bedtime, he'll be ready for bed.
As a mom of three very active boys and my husband depolyed, I learned that routines are by far the most effective strategies to make things work. Sleep is too important for everyone, including you Mom!, to let it slide. Don't be afraid to make it rough (shut doors, no TV, early to bed, early to rise) because in a few weeks when eveyone is sleeping better you will have accomplished a great thing!
Good luck and be strong...you can do it!

I'll be blunt...take the tv out of the children's rooms. Children do not need that in their rooms, especially at such a young age. I'm sure it will be tough for them to get used to the idea, but you need to be firm and stick to it. You can do it!

First thing I'd do is take the TV out of the rooms. This just encourages everyone to stay up. I know I did this with my first child..but never did it again! Next you need to establish a routine time for everyone to go to bed. Begin rituals at the same time every night. No nonsense either. Another drink, another hug...put them to bed and be stern. I know it's hard, but it has to be done. Luckily it should only take a couple nights to get the new routine into place. Children are very resilient and they should all come around to the new routine. Then your family can get the sleep that it needs to function the next day! Good Luck!

Ditto to everything Kim P and some of the others said! I was thinking exactly the same thing- get rid of the T.V. Kids don't have any business having a T.V. in their rooms, and it is not a good habit for them to have if you want them to have good sleep habits. Of course he isn't going to sleep- why go to sleep when you can sit and watch T.V. all night? You're the parent, they are the children. You have to do the right thing regardless of how much they like it or how much they fight initially. Start a bedtime routine and enforce it. It will be hard at first, but SO much easier as time goes on. They will go to bed without a fight, will sleep through the night, and won't be bears to get up in the morning. They should also be going to bed at a reasonable time, too. 8 or 8:30 for kids this young. Start the bedtime routine early enough for them all to get in their pajamas, get their teeth brushed, go potty, read a book with them, and say prayers. You will probably have to start an hour prior since you have 3 little ones. If they get out of bed, promptly return them to their rooms and let them know they are not staying up. Eventually your kids will get the message that you are the boss, they aren't going to win, and they may as well give in. As far as Derek's bed, I think you should put him back in the toddler bed, too. It sounds like he isn't ready for a big bed yet, and with the rest of the changes to the bedtime routine (which are very very needed), it may be too much for him to comprehend. I'd put his toddler bed back in his room and transition him when he is older. He's got a long way to go before he'll outgrow it, and he's not ready to give it up yet. He'll let you know when he is, and when he is, swap it out then.

Hi N.,

I suggest you get rid of the TV in their room. A TV has no value in a child's room at any age!

Reading a book or 2 or 3 (short story books) before bed is beneficial for all of the kids. Let them each pick out 1 book. It provides good interaction for all of you, is relaxing for them and allows them to unwind. Read to them in a different bedroom each night, or in another room all together. When you're done reading all 3 books that's the signal that it's time for bed.

It's important to have a bed time ritual, it prepares them for sleep. Explain to them what your plans are so they know what to expect and stick with it. Start 15-30 minutes before their bed time. Don't let them drag it out, "Another book, read it again" (which they may try to do). If one of them should choose not to pay attention while you're reading, then that one can go to bed immediately so they don't bother the one's that are interested! Each will realize that the others will be up longer if they pay attention.

Once they are put to bed, do not let them get out of their bed. They may cry or try to get out of bed but only until they're exhausted and go to sleep. It may take a week or so to get them settled into the routine.

It won't be easy for you or the kids. They will not like it at first. Don't give in after a couple of nights. That's a signal to them that if they make enough noise they'll get what they want. You need to be consistant and firm.

My question is Who is in charge? Mom/Dad or the 2 year old!

A routine is best for the whole family! If you don't get them under control now I will guarantee you it will get worse!

I wish you good luck!

I am going to disagree about taking the tv out of the bedroom, I have a 2 year old and he has a tv in his room. He is not allowed to watch tv during the day I just feel other things are better to do then watch tv but our bedtime routine is dinner, bath, brush teeth, clean up toys, I bought him a bunch of good disney movies and when he is a good boy sometimes he gets a movie(he now has about 10) and when its time to lay down he gets to pick a movie and watch it he usually falls asleep 10 minutes into it but I feel that it relaxes him and he loves it. Before I put a tv in his room he had a hard time settling down nothing I did could relax him but the movies do, so why not make him feel better. He doesn't sleep with it on all night I go in there and turn it off. But I believe what works for me might not work for anyone else. Its your choice, but some advice for you would be to get a routine and put your foot down you are the parent and they need to listen, when it is bedtime its bedtime no questions asked. And I also think that getting them up at the same time in the morning around 8 no matter how cranky they are will set a routine as well and then he will want to take a nap. Good luck

I would start with getting the movies out of their rooms. This is a bad habit for such a young age and doctors even say that it is bad as adults - leading to poor sleep habits throughout life including insomnia. The best thing you can do is a routine. It may be hard to start one now, but better late than never. Everything from dinner on should be predictible - all leading up to bed time. Bedtime should be non-negotiable. I set a small window for each child - yours being so close in age should probably be the same. For example, I aim for my 18 month-old to be in bed btw 7:45-8:15 and my 4 1/2 yr old between 8:00- 8:30. Most nights we give them a bath, put on pajamas, brush teeth, and then I usually read my daughter a story and sing her songs and lay her down while my husband plays something calm with my son. When she is down we repeat the same thing with him, only with a little more flexibility as he is 4 1/2 yrs old. He can pick out a few books, etc. When we put him in bed, he knows that's it. If you approach it as negotiable then the kids will continue to "negotiate" or not obey. Allow for a little flexibility but giving it some predictability for toddlers especially, will make it a little bit easier. Just stick to your guns and don't let him sleep in your bed - that's a habit you really don't want to start!

All I can say is that they shouldn't be watching a movie before bed. It only interferes with their ability to fall asleep on their own. Instead, try a definite bedtime routine, like bath, books, bed. Reading to your children is so important anyway, so what better time than before bed. Allow him to pick out 3 books, and once you are done with those, that's it. If he tries to come out of his room, put a hook on the outside, so he can't open his door. He will probably cry and scream at first, but after about a week of this, he'll get used to his new routine. We went through the same thing with our daughter (she just turned 3). A routine has really helped. We have to remember that we are the parents, and they are the kids. If they cry, sometimes we just have to let them be uncomfortable for a little while. We know what's best for them. As for his naps, he might be starting to give them up. Set a time limit. Send him up at a certain time. Plan on keeping him up there for 2 hours or so, not until he falls asleep. At least he had a break. (You, too!) Anyway, hang in there. I hope this helps.

Maybe you could put up a baby gate in his doorway.

Nicole,
I'm sure you have your hands full with 3! Getting them all on a routine would make your life so much easier.
I have to agree with all the other replies. My guys all sleep/nap at the exact same time (even on vacations) We have the same routine each night. We don't watch TV as a family in the evening. We read books. It relaxes them & winds them down.

We have never had a bedtime fight. As pp stated- bedtime shouldn't be negotiable with tots.

I would suggest putting them to bed by 730 or 8pm. Later bedtimes actually result in harder struggles from what I have read. Toddlers "melt down" when they are exhuasted.
My guess is you will have a few weeks of tears & fights, but your home should become calm once they understand the routine is there to stay. (whatever you do...be consistant. Don't bring them to bed with you unless you want that to be your permanent routine)

Good luck!
Becky R

I totally agree with Jennifer, TV isn't a good way to put a child to sleep! My experience also tell me the same things, my older son won't go to sleep until the TV is off. My younger son doesn't nap anymore once he turned 2, he get very tired around 5-6p.m or dinner time. Some day i will keep him in his room for at least 30 minutes in the afternoon, his choice to rest or play (By himself all alone,no TV allowed). Your three children ages are so close, they all should have the same sleep schedule by 8-9p.m. Your day will be much shorter and easier if they are bed by that time! Addition, children need their 8 hours sleep.

Hello Nicole, sounds like little Derek doesn't like all the changes going on in his life. If I remember, he is the potty training one too. If you still have the crib or toddler bed put it back in the room and slowly start talking to Derek about a big boy bed and prepare him for the deadline, when will he get his big boy bed and maybe let him help pick out the bedding or help make up the bed. I just think maybe he is being pushed to grow up to fast. Please don't be offended it is just my opinion. Good Luck B.