Getting Child to Use Toilet for #2 : )

My 3 1/2 year old had a hard time going poop in the potty and woke up one day and told me he had to go potty. So we went in the bathroom and he pooped in the potty like a big boy. His father and I are seperated so we made the point of calling his father while at work to tell him and his grandmother and even his aunt who took him out and bought him a special treat for being a big boy.
You don't want to force him because it may revert him from using it at all. I know it is frustrating and hard to deal with but in time he will do it on his own. It took me just setting my son on the toilet from time to time. Even at his age now he will request I go in the bathroom with him from time to time when he has to go. It might be the one on one time of you being in there.
I was preganant with my youngest while my son was potty training so I told him that I needed him to be a big boy for Mommy so when his brother came then he could help me. It seemed to work very well. He didn't like the idea of being a "baby" anymore.

Hi there
I am just about finished going through that same thing with my 3 1/2 yr old Jack. Too funny! I really think it was a control/attention thing - but more about having my attention than anything. I tried several things, including making him put on his diaper and clean himself up (which was actually fun for him) but what ended up working was several charts. I first made him go in the bathroom to poop in his diaper. Then he had to sit on the little potty with a diaper. (This helped him figure out the sitting muscles since he always went standing up). Then we worked our way to having only one strap attached, then no straps but the diaper still on. Then I started putting the diaper in the potty but folded up. Then I started cutting the diaper to just cover the bottom of the potty. Then finally I switched to toilet paper. Now he's ready to put the toilet paper into the big potty and go there. I know this sounds long and exhausting but it took me a long time to figure out how to decrease the struggle and this really has worked. When he starts to balk we just make a chart and say okay 3 more times with 1 strap or whatever. Then we make a big deal of marking it off the chart. He still begs me to "look at his bubbles" and such and I really think he just wants the one on one he gets being in the bathroom (I have a 2y/o too). The more we struggled the longer a phase took. So I just let it go and he did it on his own. At one point (the transition to putting the diaper in the potty) I actually let him turn on his favorite show and go in front of that because it worked. It only took a couple of times and we were back in the bathroom. Trying to make things his decision worked too. I wish you the best of luck but remember - he will poop in the potty eventually! This whole process (after 4 months of struggling) has taken only 2 months and has been much more pleasant. So good luck and let me know if you have any other questions.
H.

Tell him he grew an inch! Make a mark on the wall & let him see that he grew an inch. Get a box of "bog boy wipes" and let him use them only after he goes poop in the toilet. Good luck!!

Oh what a familiar story! That's almost exactly what happened with my first son who is now 5, Jalen. (Not Jack but still starts with a J). Jalen would pee in the toilet for almost 1 year before he stopped asking for a pamper to have bowel movements. We tried a sticker chart to reward him for just sitting on the toilet after meals (with big dollar store rewards for having received so many per week) and that didn't work. Right before his 3rd birthday I told him that if he pooped in the toilet we could have his party at Chuck-E-Cheese and he did it! Unfortunately he doesn't have a birthday every day and I wasn't interested in going to C-E-C on a daily basis to get him to poop so I had to think of something else that would motivate him. What finally worked for us was telling him that babies poop in pampers and babies don't get to watch any TV (he didn't start watching it until he was 2 and then only for an hour a day). He loved Dora and so his response was "No Dora?" and then "I'm going to go poopy in the toilet". It only worked because that was what motivated him so I'd recommend thinking of something you could reasonably use as a privelege to tie to Jack using the toilet.

Hi D.,

Your story was so cute, I had to respond. I have a 14 month old son however, I helped to raise my neice who actually lived in my home until she was four years old. She had a hard time learning how to ride her bike. Although she was and is very bright she refused to ride her bike without training wheels until she was six years old as she had stated since she was four years old. As soon as she turned six, she took the training wheels of and began to learn to ride the bike without them.
This is still amazing to me but, if you think about it, kids today are pretty amazing especially in todays society.

I really don't think you can "make" him go in the toilet. He will do it in his own time. I had to give my son Miralax to help keep him regular because he held it as well for a pull up. I tried EVERYTHING but in the end my pediatrician told him at his 5 yr old check up he could not do it anymore and guess what....he didn't. So be patient...we never know what is going on in their minds and what phobias they have. Be careful about taking pull ups away because severe constipation can lead to surgery (that is what my ped said). Hopefully he will grow out of it soon. While I was trying to force my son to do it, I got to the point where I told him he could have a pull up but he had to do his business in the bathroom. To this day he can't tell me why he needed them but I think it has something to do with relaxing. Sometimes kids just have to work these things out and we can't force them to do it on our time frame.
Patience!

My son was 3 1/2 before he started pooping in the potty. We ended up having to give him a treat every time he pooped out of a grab bag so it was a surprise and everyone had to come look at his deposit in the toilet. I had to say "bye bye down the drain"...I know it sounds rediculous, but I was tired of buying pull ups. It finally worked, it just took time.

We are having the same problem with a 3 1/2 year old boy. It's exact. He will pee, but asks for a diaper. We have tried sticker charts, candy, and other bribes. I know he knows how because we have had small sucesses about 5 times. I am very curious to see what advice you get. I get the same excuse that "boys are harder to toilet train".

I had the opposite problem, my 3 yr. old son would poop in the potty but not pee. When I took him for his 3 check up I asked the doctor about it. He said if my son was pooping in the potty, he was already potty trained and was just refusing to pee in it. He told me to put him in regular underwear (not the training kind) for a week. He said that my son should get tired of being wet and start to use the potty and if this didn't happen after a week to go back to using diapers & pull ups. I also got the underwear with his favorite character on it (Matter Truck) to help get him interested in wearing them. It worked! After 5 days he was out of his diapers and using the potty. He still has an occasional accident but over all is doing great. Hope this helps & good luck!
H.

My son was the same way! I finally broke him of it one day when he asked for a diaper, he had the poop face, I said let's try it on the toilet. He was reluctant, but I was happy about it when I sat him on the big toilet w/little cushy seat...holding onto him, so he won't fall off. He really didn't want to, but it was past the point of no return. He went, I made a HUGE deal of it...gave him a super duper big hug (spun him around in the air)...we called daddy, grandparents, aunt...to tell him what a big boy we was that he did it!!! I let him do the talking! So, everyone was so excited...he realized that it wasn't so bad. Also, after that, we had a chart. If he went on the toilet, he would get a sticker to put on his chart. After the chart was filled (a few days to start, then increase the amount of squares to fill) we would go to Chuck E. Cheese or something fun!! I think I actually let him pick a small piece of candy immediately after as a reward, too. (It's been about 4 years) And we the diapers to his little sister who was on the way! No accidents or reverting back!

have him use toilet w/dad (try it) my son never use pot at all. get small toilet ring w/favorite character. sit on toilet 3 times a day after each meal and read to him while on the toilet. get books showing little boys on the toilet.

good luck!!vee

D. - I just read an article about this in the newspaper last week by a Dr. Rosemond who does a column on parenting in our local paper! Check out this link I found to take you directly to the article - hope it helps - Terry B.

http://rosemond.com/index.php?action=website-view&Web...