My son's biggest issue is nursing to go to bed or take a nap. I have tried laying him in his crib, and letting him cry, but there's just no way this will work, because he will cry for hours. He wants what he wants and that is that. As soon as I set him in the crib he gets mad and starts crying, the only way I can put him to bed in his own bed is when he falls asleep nursing and I move him. He is also VERY clingy, if he wants to be held, and I set him down to do something, he will follow me crying as loud as he can. What do I do! I also have a 2yr old, so I have to be able to set him down as well as put him to bed, without a two hour meltdown, HELP!
If you have the option, someone else should take over the bedtime routine and put him down, soothe, etc. You stay entirely out of sight during this time as if you were not even home. Do this for as many nights as it takes to establish the new routine.
For the 'clingy' stage. I used an umbrella stroller in the house, to take him place to place, without having to hold him. I also had a playpen in the kitchen and one in the living room.
For the sleeping, if you are sure that he isn't hungry, try giving him a sippy cup of luke-warm water. Sit and a chair and hold him. Don't rock. Don't sing, unless you want that to become his new 'soothe'. Remember, don't start something you aren't willing to continue.
You can also try having hubby do the bedtime routine.
Looks like he needs to learn to self-sooth. I did the 'slow but stead' approach to this with my nursing babies. Start out with nursing until he is 99.5% asleep, then transfer to the crib. If that's going well, then start cutting off the nursing when he is really really drowsy (long blinks but still eyes open) and put him into his crib (it will take a few tries the 1st few nights until he gets tired enough to go to the crib without waking completely up again). But once that is going ok, have him stop nursing and put him in the crib when he is sleepy, but not long-blinks drowsy. So over time, you are putting him in bed more and more awake, and he is learning, slowly, to self-soothe and put himself to sleep. It can take a while - each step may take a few weeks, but you can slowly get there.
Go out and leave let your husband put him to bed. If you are not around, he cannot nurse. The only way to do it. It will have to be several nights.
