Five Year Old Suspended?

I truly hope she gets counseling for her. I was serious in my response when I said kids like her daughter wreaked havoc on my kids and classrooms over the years. I think kids like that should be suspended instead of just letting them stay and create a bad environment for all the other kids.

"Semolina" who posted the original question replies below but she does not say why she yanked the original post (or if Mamapedia did it).

Semolina writes below, "She told me tonight that she is behaving badly because she missed her friends at her old school and wants to go back. I told her she is never going back there, so put that little idea out of her head!"

You still don't GET it, do you? That reply above was cruel to your child. Please get parenting classes or even therapy for yourself as well as her. You are still throwing all the blame on her. What you described about her behavior cannot be only about "I miss my old school" though that surely is one part of it. But by saying that, she gave you a convenient hook to hang all the blame on, so now you can say, "Oh, she's being bad because she wants to go back and HA! She's never going back, so there!" That is exactly how your reply above comes across -- downright mean, and punishing her for her emotions. You don't punish for an emotion. And the behaviors for which you want to punish her and for which she was suspended are about so much more than "I want my old school." Plus: She was acting out at the old school too and you and the school did not work through that BEFORE sending her to another school. So of course she acted out at the new one.

Others on here have seen your posts about your child's past issues. Why do you keep posting if you only accept answers that say what you want to hear (which seems to me to be, "your child is at fault")?

Please get her some therapy now and get yourself some now too so you can learn WHY she is doing these things before she hurts another child and you and she both end up dealing with the police, not just the schools. She is a child. You need to be the parent and dig deeper into resolving her real issues, not just fixing her short-term behaviors. Please help her.

I think she removed it because she felt many of us were "unkind" in our responses.
It's too bad. A five year old who pushes, hits and spits at others has some serious underlying issues, but sadly this mom thinks it's just a matter of her daughter missing her friends, and she's going to "deal" with it by giving her chores.
<sigh>
Kids who miss their friends don't react with violence, and being clever is no excuse for being cruel.
Another parent making excuses for a troubled child headed down an ugly path :-(

I'm really touched by all of your concern, I read ALL the answers, kind, and unkind. And I really appreciate all of your advice, and certainly will be implementing some of it. My daughter got to go to bed after school, and is still in there crying. Tomorrow on her suspension day she will be doing chores. I am going to try and make something positive out of this. She is a clever little thing, she told me tonight that she is behaving badly because she missed her friends at her old school and wants to go back. I told her she is never going back there, so put that little idea out of her head! thank you again.

Leigh - For goodness sake! I said that because I did not want her to misbehave just because she thinks that misbehaving will cause her to get expelled. That was the little idea that was forming in her head. You misunderstood me. I wasn't trying to be cruel to her, only explaining misbehaving and being removed from the class will not allow her to go back to preschool.

She flamed a responder (who thought the post sounded trollish - they might be right) so the post was deleted.
It really sounds like she's having some sort of denial about her daughter's behavior.
Sometimes a parent wants things to be normal so very badly that they think that insisting things ARE normal will MAKE it so - and they can bury their head in the sand for a very long time.
The child is 5 yrs old, and the behavior described is violent (pushing, slapping, spitting), combative and is not caring about consequences or punishment and has been sent to the principal 6 times in 5 days of school.
The kid needs to be evaluated by a behavioral psychologist and might need ongoing therapy and medication.
I really hope she gets some help before she hurts herself or anyone else.

The school has to provide a safe environment for learning - for everyone.
That means you can't have a child who's beating up the rest of the class.
I wouldn't want my son being slapped, pushed and spat on and I'm sure the other parents feel the same way.
She needs help but I agree with the suspension/expulsion.

wow. I have never seen a question removed. I have only seen when posters delete and need to leave one symbol. i commented on it and it is gone.

Is this the same girl who was so violent to her pet cat two years ago? Sad. I missed the original post.

ETA: I meant that comment to be reaching out to Semolina, I just saw her past posts about her daughter. Hope everything works out.

It was removed because the original poster fussed at a responder who blasted her. She has a troubled chid and I hope that she copied and pasted the helpful answers before the thread was pulled.

I think it was because she insulted a commenter (with a cuss word.) Other then that, no idea.

Hopefully, she was able to read the answers before it was pulled.

Yeah so it seems this post was deleted and removed.
Um, how come?

Maybe the poster removed it.

ETA: I do agree that it's more than just treating the symptoms. Missing her friends is probably an honest statement from your child. She is hurting. You need to get to the root of that hurt so you don't have this behavior. Being so bad that she needed to be sent to the principal five or six times in the beginning of school is not normal. She needs a behavior plan, she needs therapy, she needs help. If this school cannot provide it, then she needs a different school.

Semolina needs to read the book 1-2-3 magic. She is reacting/emotional ad angry. Heck we all can be guilty of it, but recognizing it and seeing that it might be impacting your child and changing your behavior is another thing. I'm reading the book now and I like it. We've done the 1-2-3 before and reward charts so we are just going to re-implement them . We all make mistakes and perhaps she's in denial or perhaps adding fuel to the fire. First is recognizing what it could be and taking care of it.