I can help some with the second question. We have several accounts too to help us save for things, but the best way that we've gotten our non-bill spending under of control is to do a cash pull every two weeks. We have a budget for groceries and meals out (usually just one date night per week) and we pull that every pay day. Once we blow through that money, that's it. So, if we have some crazy meal schedule one week and we have to get weird things at the grocery store that cost more, the next week is much simpler because we only use that money.
We've been doing this for about a year now and it's made a huge difference. We have a car fund set aside (since both our cars are paid off, this is where we pay ourselves a monthly car payment in case a repair is needed, etc), we have college funds and regular savings accounts. I would recommend if you would like to buy a bigger house eventually, you set up a house account where you can automatically save each month for an additional down payment (in case you don't get quite enough from your current house).
We found that our bills are pretty much the same every month, so the difference in our budget was made on spending at the grocery store and for entertainment. It's also nice to have cash on hand so you can tell exactly how much you have left to spend and see how much you saved if you were under budget that week!
Hope this helps. Like I said, it's certainly helped us!
Good luck!
Hilary