Feeling...blah.

I love going to Barnes and Noble or Borders and get a cup of coffee and sit and read. That is bliss for me - I know it isn't exciting but it is peaceful and I need that way more than exciting. It is exciting really because you are open to new things now as you have probably changed so much. :)

Hi B.,

I have been there! I have 2 kids now 3 and 8 and really needed my time or at least to do something fun that include adults in the same boat that I was.

I started a home business, and everything changed, I can still take care of my kids the way I want but also talk with adults mostly moms like me!

You can do something that you like, there are lots of businesses that you can do from home without the hassle, just make sure that you check the company very well before getting into something, but I sure recomed it, it had changed my life!

Hope it helps,

Mariana Abadie
www.MyKidsFirst.com

When I first started staying home with my kids I thought it would be this great adventure. I'd be able to take them places and do all kinds of mom things that all my friends were doing. For some reason this didn't happen and about 2 months in I realized I had to do something. For me, what worked was getting a job at the local YMCA. It was great because I worked in the child watch so my kids could come with me. My shift was only 2 hours every couple of days, and best of all, on the days I didn't have to work, I got to WORK OUT, which really lifted my spirits. I don't know if you're athletic, but I can tell you, when I first started at the Y I weighed 220 pounds. But it didn't matter because having that hour or so to myself helped me focus on me, release endorphins, and make lots of new friends. Plus my kids were with me, but were away from me having fun and making friends of their own.

You can always go to the Xenox hairstyling academy. Since you allow students to do all the spa work, it is immensely cheaper. I also find that it takes a lot longer to get your hair done, because it has to be approved by the teachers.

Also, take your daughter and go to do something fun that way you don't think about cleaning the toliet and all the other household chores that fall into your lap.

Change your routine, even if just slightly, to give yourself a bounce to your day. I know how hard it can be find other young couples. We were once in the same boat.

I think we all at one time feel the "blah" feeling. I use to be a stay at home mother until his father vanished for lack of better words. Now I wish that I could stay home and be with my son who seems like he went from newborn to 3 yrs old over night. I do cherish the time we do get to spend together at nights before bedtime so I get that much at least. Don't get me wrong I LOVE MY SON WITH ALL MY HEART AND WORLD but I know everyone male or female who have children at times need their "me" time or just a little break to relax.

I would sit and think about all the pros and cons about returning to work. Remember daycare or childcare is not cheap and you might be working just to pay for that. I can get a number to a place that does hourly rates in lees summit if you are close to that.. where you could get "me" time once a day if needed.

If you ever need to talk about anything or would want to do a kiddie date.. since my son doesnt have any children at home and stays with home during that day with my father right now.. he would love to have a little friend.

Let me know.. my email is ____@____.com..

I definitely felt that same way when I was home with my daughter when she was young. My husband worked long hours and I was pretty much on my own for 12-15 hours a day with little "grown up" conversation. You tend to lose your identity at first when you're a new mom. When I started talking back to Steve on Blue's Clues, I knew I was in dire need of outside "grown up" conversation. :)
My advice would be to get out with your husband at least once a week and also scheduled some time out with a friend. Girlfriends can do wonders recharging our batteries. Or, maybe an excercise, dance, pilates or yoga class or something along those lines. Check out your local community center for classes. They even have art classes if that interests you. I found that getting out a few hours a week with my girlfriends really helped.

Hi B. - I'm an older mom than you - 31, but I can tell you from all of my sisters, cousins, sisters-in-law and girlfriends - most women go through exactly what you're feeling - even working moms. Sometimes just taking time to go for a walk or do a little shopping or sitting at Starbucks with a magazine for an hour - ALONE makes all the difference in the world. For me, getting dressed up, doing my hair and make-up and going out - even if it's just a quick dinner with my husband without the babies - is so helpful.
However, you have figured out the problem and you have a supportive husband - those are the two things that are key!!
You'll have to figure out which activity or what "excuse" you need to get out of the house for a while - be it lunch with a girlfriend, a movie or an afternoon on the Plaza to just brouse, but it sounds to me like you're on the right track :)
And you're definitely correct that it will make you a better mom.
Good luck and take care!!

Everyone feels like this. My advice is go to a girlfriend's house for a day or a couple of days. You don't have to spend a lot of money and time around other adults that you aren't married too is usually good thing. I also try to spend a little time each night either reading or watching a tv show that I really like. Another thing that sounds hokey is I really try to remind myself of all of the things in my life that are really great. It is hard not to feel sorry for ourselves sometimes, but try to focus on what you do that you really love.

Do you have any friends or family nearby that can watch Emme for a few hours while you get out? Even if they just watch her while you run out to do a few errands (groceries, bank, etc...) it will help. I find that just getting out and browsing a bookstore or clothes helps, even if I don't buy anything. I also like to take my daughter on walks around the neighborhood, or load up the stroller and drive to a park and walk around there. It's really important to get out of the house. Also take advantage of friends and family to babysit so you and your husband can get out for a date night. Try to get out once a week. It really helps!