Does anyone out there have suggestions as to how I can feel more organized. I am going round and round in circles trying to get prepared for the new arrival - but seriously feel like a dog chasing its own tail.
Have given birth and still feel disorganized! However have moved onto the next big question - Bowel Movements! Thanks for all the suggestions.
a wonderful lady told me, start in a corner and the middle will fall into place, being an older mom with a 5yr old son, disabled with a wonderful husband , I found this to be true when I started to try spring cleaning in a house full of clutter with only my husbands help. I was so overwhelmed, but I put it to work, and although my progress is slow, It Works
good luck
My girls are 4 years apart, and wow do I feel you!
Make realistic goals of how you are spending day with lots of wiggle room and ask for help! That is when my hubby got involved in helping maintain home, bills etc, was when #2 arrived!
L. B
With only a couple days left, spend as much time with your 4 year old as possible, it's the last time he will be an only child. I have a 3 year old and a 6 month old and know how hard it is to get organized. The first couple of months were a little chaotic, but I do have advice for after the birth of your second child (congratulations!)
I made a list of bigger organizing things that need to get done (filing, organizing closets, etc.) to do at 'some point' and when I have time I tackle one of them. I also used to worry about how to get organized, but remind myself that housework/organizing can wait, but your children growing up does not wait. I had a friend send this to me and I've put it on my refrigerator to remind myself of this...
Too Busy
The dishes are still in the sink.
Dirty laundry is piled high.
Somehow the entire day,
Seemed to just fly by.
I made a "to-do" list
I meant to follow through.
But there were other tasks,
That needed attention too.
Like cheering on my son,
As he took first steps into my arms,
Making sure he stayed safe,
From all potential harms.
Cuddling on the couch,
And reading a favorite story.
Helping him explore the world,
And marvel at all its glory.
So the chores will have to wait.
They aren't that important anyway.
Because I was simply too busy,
Loving my child today.
To keep the house 'almost' clean I have designated each day of the week for one chore...Monday laundry gets done (usually) Tuesday bathrooms get cleaned (sometimes)...etc. I leave one day of the week to get caught up on things that don't get done. This way when I see something that needs to get done, I don't worry about it because I have a day designated for just that purpose. I've learned not to get upset if things don't get done, however. If my child says 'mommy play with me', that is more important than getting other stuff done. Try not to worry about things so much just be there for your kids, everything else will fall into place. Good luck!
Get systems in place for everything! Dishes unloaded as soon as they're done, sort laundry at the dryer, make sure everything has its place. Mail sorters with pay, read, and recycle labels.
Even with these systems I felt disorganized for a few months with two kids, but it gets better. The biggest change will be for your older child, make sure they're adjusted and prepared, this will make your whole world easier! Congrats on #2!!
The website www.flylady.net has completely changed my way of thinking, as far as helping me to become a LOT more organized and feel better about myself. It is free, even! Blessings to you and yours! :)
Two of the best tips I've come across are that one morning hour is as good as three afternoon hours, which I find to be very true in my home. If I don't get it done in the morning, it probably won't happen. Save sitting things for the afternoon (computer time, mending, bills, reading to the kids, etc.) Do standing things in the morning when you have more energy (dishes, vacuuming, etc.) The next is to simply put things away when you are done with them. It sounds easy, but is a huge challenge for me because I'm not in the habit. Also, if I don't make my bed the instant I roll out of it, it rarely happens.
Instead of feeling overwhelmed by a whole house to organize, and then never feeling motivated enough to tackle it all, pick out one small thing to organize every day, then feel great accomplishment when you do it. Maybe a shelf, or a drawer, or the top of the dresser, or a closet, or one cupboard. (And then remember to put things away the second you are done with them).
Good luck! I'm trying to figure it out myself as well. I just got the book Ergonomic Living (used/cheap off amazon) and started reading it. They are really logical and start off with what comes through the front door (kids coats, shoes, umbrellas, backpacks) and talk about making it convenient for everyone to put their items away right next to the door... It's really good, and makes sense. I recommend the book, and am going to be implementing its suggestions.
First think positive:-)!! You can do it!!!
Second ASK FOR HELP!!! Neighbors, mom, spouse, teenage kid down the street. You don't have to do it all and your never have to do it all alone.
When I get really overwhelmed, I make a list of all things I "think" have to be done. Then I put it in order of importance. Start down the list and go as far as I can. Sometimes it helps just to see how far I have really come.
good luck and congratulations on that second arrival.
The best advice that I ever got was to make a chore list and follow it. Everyday had chores under it's column, different each day if you want, and keep the regiment up so that you create a rythm each day. This includes laundry day, dusting, vvacuuming, cleaning bathrooms,,,,,,,all of your chores divided up on a chart. It will help a lot to see them visually, what needs to be done.
In addition to the advice you've already received, I would also say at some point you just have to realize you WON'T get everything done--and that's ok. Once your baby arrives, it won't seem so important if there are dirty dishes or laundry stacked up a bit longer than normal. It's great to have systems in place, to ask for help, etc. But I felt so much better when I finally relaxed and said, you know what, it's just NOT all going to get done and I'm ok with that. :) (Which is a hard thing for me to say!)
Think about your day and your family. What do you want to accomplish? What means the most to you? I read Julie Morgenstein's book "Organizing from the Inside Out". She suggests that you organize whatever you need to by working within your own living patterns. It works. I am by nature a procrastinating, disorganized person, but my life is so much better since I started following this concept. I think I started wanting to change when I got tired of looking for things. Hard to do when your little ones are 26 months apart! Do you like to clean house in the morning or afternoon or maybe weekends? Work around that. Laundry was always a problem for me. I wanted something simple yet functional and I wanted to be able to teach my 3 kids in the long run to be able to at least sort clothes properly. Now everyone has their own laundry hamper with a sign above it so the kids know where to sort things out. Also with one for towels/linens, whites. My husband and I share one as do our sons. The kids just take their own laundry baskets in and sort them out.
I am still working on my communications stuff. I have a way better system than I ever had, but it has to be maintained. The best system in the world will do you no good if you do not work it. For me, having the bills out of sight in a basket or whatever does not work. Also, when your children get old enough to fetch the mail it can disappear behind the couch or wherever. I now have a hanging file system that sits on my desktop. I have a file for everyone we owe. I inserted a computer generated payment sheet that I record the date, amount and confirmation # of the payments I make. I don't make a payment without getting out the file and then putting it back it easy because it is right there. It is also a good record of what you spend on anything in a year. I also use and excell spreadsheet that I made to coincide with our pay periods. This has helped me know where our money is going. Face it. We know that we are going to have a house payment, phone and other utilties, insurance, etc, coming every month. There should be few surprises financially for anyone. I even put on it things like prescription refills; anything that we spend money routinely on. I also include birthdays, Christmas etc. I can plan ahead without putting our family under duress for my lack of planning. This was my downfall and I would dive frantically looking for bills then struggle to meet the payment and put us in financial strain. Following Julie Morgenstein's advice I just started thinking about what I wanted to happen in my home first before buying any organizers that maybe wouldn't work anyway because they didn't fit my lifestyle. I hate using a dayplanner. I have a purse sized calendar with an address book in it. That works for me and it is a lot smaller. I also have a large write on calendar above my desk. I also make precedence to go online to check on my bank account nearly every day. I am almost never overdrawn. That is such a relief.
I have just given you a few examples of things I have worked on that having gotten under control has enabled me to enjoy the time with my family that I really want and need. Read Julie's book and start working to enjoy your life.
Hi A. ~
It's www.flylady.net! Belive me; 15 minutes at a time and your life will change!!! Just start out with the 'baby steps' and you will see a change! Honestly! Try to "flutter" at least for a while! Each morning, I get up; get dressed for work (while my 'little one is having breakfast that I have prepared @ 5:30 am) and my day is ready to begin! He must be at the designated drive area @ 6:30 am and I take him there (because it it very early in the morning) and he begins class at 7:15 am. By this time I am ready to go to work and be there before 8:00 am. (I am in real estate and this is the best time to make calls ~ especially to lenders in the East coast.) I am able to pick up my son by the time he gets out of school @ 1:45.
I know this sounds very overwhelming right now, but give it a try. Just start out slowly and you will see the change; (even if you only see it!) Do it for YOU and the others (family) will follow! Good Luck!!!!
Lucy B.
Hi A.,
There are a ton of wonderful suggestions already listed, but I wanted to recommend someone that helped me. I hired a "Professional" organizer and while helped get things cleaned up, I never really felt "organized."
Then a woman from a parenting group mentioned she loves organizing and offered to help me for a lot less than the professional. Well, she came over and she really helped me "clean house" and get organized. She helped set up systems that worked. SHe talked to me and understood my needs as well as how I would function and use certain things and helped me get things into a system that seemed natural and easy to keep up with. She was a true lifesaver and she cost me 1/5 of what it cost to hire the "professional!"
If you would like her name, just let me know. She is a mom and understands the challenges we face. I have recommend her to several other moms and they all have been thrilled with her help!
So if you feel like you need someone to come in on a professional basis and really get things done quickly and make some changes, this is a good route!
Sincerely,
A.
sign up for her emails - she helps with organization and basic cleaning. you have to follow "babysteps" and not get frustrated with it not being done in a hot second, but it does work!
also, making lists does not work for me - but it does for my husband. i make one before summer starts of our various house projects - and post it. By the end of summer, almost 100% are complete! otherwise, none would be done.
Hi!
I will tell you what I did. I went to flylady.net.
Remember that to get organized there is no a "quick fix". If you go to flylady.net and do what she says, she will give you advice and babysteps on how to get organized, one baby step at a time, and how to stay organized. She is AWESOME!!!! And, it's FREE!!!! She sends you e-mails eveeryday and she and her crew tell you step-by-step how to get organized from just keeping up with your house, to paying bills, getting everyday things done, etc. Check her out! You won't be sorry you did. I stress, however, *do what she says*, or you will just end of getting overwhelmed, and her routines and baby steps won't work for you. www.flylady.net
Good Luck,
C.
Ohhhh A., if you figure this one out let me know. I have a 4 yr old and am due in September. I work as well so I never feel like I have time to really tidy/clean the house how I want it. And not feeling like playing with my daughter is really discouraging - I feel bad telling her "mommy is too tired right now". Ughh.
I kind of feel useless most days. Not sure if it is just a phase and I will feel better next week? I am contemplating taking an extra day off just to clean the house and take a nap!
I am also expecting very soon and at times have felt very overwhelmed with all of the details.
What has helped me is to make a list,prioritize the tasks,and then tackle each thing I want to get done one at a time!I think when your mind darts from one thing to another it can truly feel overwhelming and impossible to get a handle on,but if you stick to one task it can feel very satisfying to check it off the list! Good luck!
I read your 2nd notice that mentioned you are still unorganized. I'd love to help you change that. I'm a Professional Organizer. I actually became one as a result of helping someone on mamasource.com! I can say that I'm good at what I do due to the fact that I have not had one client complain about the results. They are always satisfied. Please see my website for more details. www.find-my-desk.com. I look forward to hearing from you!
Hey A..
Second question/concern...Wev'e all been there!!!!Some of us more than once. LOL.
HERBLAX is a SAFE laxitive, especcially if you are nursing baby; and does wonders! www.shaklee.net/healthy or www.yourhealthyalternatives.com
Definitely call Sara Eisen of the Nest. She is absolutely fantastic at organizing and making your home feel homey without spending a ton of money.
www.nestseattle.com
###-###-####
Listen to the ladies who told you about www.flylady.net!!!!
Its called nesting...totally normal to be going around and around in circles. Just try to relax I'm sure all that really needs to be ready you've already taken care of. Congrats
feeling disorganized is something i think all mothers should have before a newborn. just get started on a project like getting the room ready for a newborn. is it a girl or a boy just make it feel like a home. like the doors are open at anytime even if he or she makes a mistake dont yell dont ground them let them be them. kids will be kids mistakes and all. and if you think, will i be a good mother. will i make them hate or appreciate. and start thinking about a vacation after.
Hi A.!
Sounds like you've had nesting instinct real bad!
Here's what I did...
First, I made sure NOBODY was home to distract me.
I put on some soothing, uplifting music on, rolled up my sleeves and went into the baby's nursery....
I found it helpful to sort things out like-by-like first, and then determine WHERE to put one type of thing first and move to the next item to organize. First, strip the closet in the nursery, until it is empty. Then, start with baby clothes and sort them by size. Just keep out the newborn size clothes and put them into the closet and put the rest into boxes by size (label the boxes) and put them on a top shelf or in a closet out of the way. Same with diapers if people give you a bunch of larger diapers.
Take one thing at a time...get that ONE closet organized (all blankets, sheets, on one shelf then move to the next shelf). While you are working, have a tupperware box for "stuff I don't need until later" and chuck everything that isn't important for the next six months in there (toys, clothes, shoes). Put that tupperware container on a top shelf and mark it "WINTER" or whatever six months is from the time you first put the stuff in there. Then, have a trashbag next to you as you sort through stuff for items to give away or send to the Goodwill (or...for a future yard sale!).
Next, set up your diaper changing table. Have wipes, diapers and changes of clothes handy.
Last, shampoo the carpet if there is carpet in the nursery.
Use a NATURAL carpet shampoo like SOLUMEL and rent a BISSELL
carpet cleaner. Other carpet shampoos can leave fumes that may harm your baby's tiny lungs.
Get bath products set up in the bathroom and be sure to have a baby bathtub with washclothes and NATURAL soaps like
KOALA PALS. Don't buy Johnson and Johnson products....they
have formaldehyde in them, which is actually TOXIC to your baby!
Well..this is a start. I hope you'll tell me how you did
getting organized.
Don't stress out...have fun getting your life in order for your new baby!
If you'd like more information about SOLUMEL and KOALA PALS
just give me a call at ###-###-####
Good luck!
:>) J.
