Feeding and Sleeping Help

Alison,
My son was almost 10 lbs when he was born and after a bit just formula was not enough. I bought some Gerbers baby rice cereal and up 4 tbs in about a 6 oz bottle of formula and that was what he needed, he was still hungry and having the cereal in his bottle filled his tummy and that made him stop being fussy and sleepy. Give it a try and see what happens.

The big change could be teething. She may not be hungry in the middle of the night just wants to suck for relief for her gums. My daughter was very similar. Try giving her something to chew on that she can manipulate with her gums. A pacifier might work, you could rub her gums and that might relieve a little. I found a cold rubber coated spoon worked with my daughter. If you rub her gums and it feels bumpy askt he pediatrician but Tylenol could help when she really can't get comfortable.
GOOD LUCK!!

Hi. Sounds familiar. I'm on my second baby. (3 1/2 months and a 2 1/2 year old) Here's my personal experience with this.
1. 3-4 months is when babies start to become more aware of their environment and they want to see what's going on. They are more interested in what's going on around them than eating. This may be why she wakes up at night to eat because she is hungry from not eating enough during the day. Try feeding her in a quiet, relaxing environment and multiple feedings during the day so that she is less hungry at night.
2. She may also be over stimulated from all the excitement during the day to lay down and nap. Or maybe there is a lot to look at in the crib. Try to make the room like it is at night, quiet with the shades pulled. And It might help to wind her down for naps with sleepy music or sound machine and rocking her to sleep.
3. I call this the cranky hour. when both my kids are cranky from a long day and ready to mellow out and go to bed. turn off the tv, dim the lights, put on some relaxing music, give her a bath. Just do the things that will wind her down. This usually makes it easier for them to go to bed too. And then you and your husband can have a relaxing dinner while she's sleeping.
If these things don't work don't worry, you'll figure it out or it will eventually pass. And once you figure one thing out, a new thing pops up!

Hi Alison.....also first time mom, so not an expert.....and it took 2 years for us.
My son is 4 months also and I experience the same behavior when he is over tired. He was 8lbs 1 oz at birth, 14.5@ 2 months and at 4 mos he is already 19.5 lbs!

The max I can keep him awake is 1.5-3 hours. As soon as he yawns or rubs his eyes or is cranky I lay him down and he naps....sometimes 45 minutes sometimes 3.5 hours.....and for three weeks now he is sleeping through the night. He sleeps better at night when he naps longer during the day....if he has a series of lousy short naps during the day he is a nightmare and up few times during the night.

If he is fussy at 5....he will nap for 45 minutes and then Ill put him down for the night at 8-9 instead of 7. (at 6 mnths I hope to get him in a regular schedule..I think he is to young right now)

He has a huge appetite so I can't help you there unless your daughter is snacking....never getting really hungry and using the bottle to soothe...maybe try a pacifier between feeding to stretch them out so she has larger feedings. Colm is eating 6-8oz and I started him on Cereal 2 weeks ago because he was always hungry.

If he will not let me put him in the bouncy or the swing I know he is overtired or hungry.

(I do cheat sometimes to avoid long wake stretches and give him 2-4 oz just to to get him sleepier so I can put him down)

Typically he feeds every 3 hours...sometimes less sometimes more.

Everything is trial and error...... the more sleep he gets the happier he is when he is awake and the easier it is fro me to put him to sleep.

I have been using Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child by DR. Weissbluth as a guide and it has been real helpful....it has worked for my 10 nieces and nephews...so far it is helping me too.

Hope my story helps you....

K.

Firstly congratulations and welcome to the world of the unpredictable!!! My son like yours slept through from an early age although he has continued to be a good sleeper. As a previous responder mentioned wrapping your babe might help. I think this is a great thing. The idea is they don't wake themselves up by involuntary movements. Naturally this can only be done until they start rolling and then it needs to be stopped.
I fed my son solids when he was 4 months old. After a week he wasn't spitting anything out. He has always been a good eater and used to breastfeed easily and quickly. I know the literature says to wait until 6 months to feed and I was told this is to reduce risk of allergies. The Drs I spoke to were mixed about this issue so I made my own choice to start.

Remember that no babe sleeps through they have just learnt to put themselves to sleep. So try placing your daughter in the crib before she falls asleep so she can learn to soothe herself. During the day try putting her down alittle earlier. My son was only up for 1.5 hrs at a time (no more than 2 hours) at 4 months. If I kept him awake longer he was a nightmare to put to down for a nap. I was amazed at how much he slept. I would try resettling if your daughter wakes in the first 30mins of going down. As hard as it is try doing so without picking her up. I used the place my son slightly on his side and pat his bottom gently or place my hand on his cchest for comfort. I used these techniques because he was a big babe and become too heavy to carry for long periods especially when I was tired. He was a babe that hated you sitting with him (unless he was feeding). So if you carried him, he wanted to be over your shoulder and you had to be standing. I was well and truely over that by 3months!!

Have you tried a "rollover feed"? Friends who have tried it swear by it. The idea is you are meant to feed your babe at 6-7pm and put them down for the night and they should wake at 6am. If your little person is waking around 2-3am then the rollover feed might work. Once you put your daughter down at 6-7pm, pick her up and feed her at 10pmish, even though she hasn't woken up yet. She should be drowsy but awake enough to suck. The hope is the top up will prevent her from waking up at 2 in the morning and give you a good block of sleep until 6 am!
Goodluck. I hope you find what works for you and your daughter!

Buckle in! This is the first of MANY changes that you'll experience with your baby!! JUST when you think you have it "down" and a schedule is in place, your little girl will remind you of who is REALLY in control!! One thing that I have personally experienced through my own child as well as through many of my girlfriends' children, is that they go through periods of growth and periods of rest - so, the same will go for you - while she's growing, you'll grow in your motherhood and wisdom (remember, no pain - ie. tears, no gain!)...and when she's at rest, REST!! ENJOY IT!! I clearly remember "the witching hour" that you refer to - 4-8 PM...hang in there, this too shall pass...don't feel guilty about holding her - a time will come when you can no longer hold her - it is IMPOSSIBLE to love her too much!! - it's our job to hold and love our babies!!! My little girl is now 6 - it goes by SO FAST, just know that these difficult times are so brief, even though it seems like it's so hard and FOREVER...I had a hard time conceiving as well...and when things become a little challenging (because they STILL DO!), I just remind myself of what an incredible MIRACLE and BLESSING that I hold in my hands...You are blessed to have people to bounce things off of as well - hold dear your girlfriends with children or that have had children - I found them to be a wealth of information and wisdom! HANG IN THERE!!!! When the going gets tough, remember, "This, too, shall pass!"

Well, at about four months of age, you can start feeding her pureed foods: pureed veggies for example. You can alternate her feedings with foods. I would consult her Pediatrician if you are not sure.

With the sleeping problem, she probably is hungry because she is ready to start feeding and is not feeling full with the milk. Her fussiness between 4 and 8 pm could probably be colic. How are her bowel movements?

I would not get her used to the late night feedings as you will reinforce that behavior.

Hi Alison,

Well, while I'm not a doctor, I can tell you that many of your daughter's sympromts matched my child's. She was diagnosed with reflux. (Does your daughter arch her back, hyperestend or turn her head while feeding?) Suffice to say, after trying Zantac then Axid, Prevacid has helped wonderfully.

Sleep distrubances are suprisingly common for children with reflux--it makes sense given that when they lie down, everything starts to come back up, even without active wet burps, etc. You should run it all past your pediatrician (but I'm sure you know that :-)).

Anyway, that's my non-medical thought....

Best of luck!

Hi there - Sounds like it may be a case of teething. Sometimes even when you can't see any signs of teething (swollen gums ect), it is often the cause for a baby changing their usually predictable schedule. That may be her reason for eating less too. I've read that sucking on a bottle aggrivates the gums when teething. Are you feeing her cereals yet? this may be why she is wanting less formula too. As for the crib during naptime you may have to let her cry it out and sooth herself to sleep. It may seem hard, but believe me it will be the best thing you can ever do for you both. After a few days if will get better - I promise. The holdiong thing may be a combination of things...like the teething, but also she may be tired. that was always the "witching hour" for my girls too! around 5-6:00. Good Luck!

Just a thought - are you feeding formula or breast milk? Is she gassy or look likes her tummy hurts at all? Sometimes dairy (in most formulas and maybe your diet if you are nursing) is hard on their stomachs. You could consider cutting it out of her diet for 5-7 days and seeing if it makes a difference. All the "hypo-allergenic" formulas from what I could tell (i.e. Nutramagen) have some form of dairy - so you may want to consider soy. You may want to ask your pediatrician about it.

I used to keep my daughter up at night to see daddy but then I realized the later I kept her up the harder it was to get her down and to sleep through the night. It literally took me 10 months before she slept 11 hours. For me what worked was putting her bed consistently at the same time, keeping to a night time routine and I stopped going in to nurse every time she awoke to get her back to bed. Again - this took me until 10 months.

Also - she could be going through a growth spurt or teething which makes her fussy at night. Does she have a lot of drool? Usually this is a sign of teething even if you don't see buds.

Just know that sometimes just when it appears that they have a routine or schedule - it's very common for it all to change and it will change back again. Best of luck.

I am a grandma now and had custody of my grandaughter for a while. What we found that she liked on sleepless nights was a little cereal in her bottle of vanilla milk. just put a few drops of vanilla flavoring and a little kero syrup in the bottle and warm it up. It helped my grandaughter to sleep through the night. it was good and filling and she drank it all down. sounds like she is not eatting before she goes to bed like she used to, so she gets hungry in the night. T.

Allison,

About the feeding, ask your pediatrician about carnation good start, it is a fantastic formula for babies. I found that with this formula my kids never vomited their formula, and it soothed their tummies for a good night sleep. Also try a teaspoon of baby cereal, something light (rice), to make her tummy full. For sleep at night, bath and body works sells a pilllow mist that is gentle enough to use on kids, not directly on her pillow, but on a blanket that she may sleep with it is lavander and chamomille, that is also great. Hope this helps good luck.

Hey Alison! This information may help you. I know you said your daughter was four months old, and that she was formula fed. My son was breastfed early on but we changed to formula feeding around his second month of age. Once he reached four months, our pediatrician gave us the ok to begin introducing simple solid foods. We started with bananas. Our son rejected the slimy spoonfuls at first, but with a little practice he began accustomed to having textured food, instead of just formula. I'm suggesting this because your daughter may not be losing her appetite, but may be ready for a different avenue of nourishment. This may also help her rest better during the night because having dinner with solids may help her to rest longer without getting hungry. Ask your pediatrician if she may be ready to give it a try, and read up on it. Once you get the ok, grab your camera and have fun!

The eating and sleeping pattern changes are pretty normal.

But the fussiness sounds like maybe she has a mild case of Colic. Colic usually rears it's ugly head between 3 and 4 months and lasts about 6 weeks!! UGGG!! Our daughter had severe colic and the only thing we could do to stop her from crying is to walk with her. We had to hold her laying on our arm with her chin in our had so she was on her belly and looking at the floor (a position that we did not discover until about 4 weeks into the colic, when my uncle-in-law showed us.)

Unfortunately they do not know what causes colic, but they think that there is a possibility that it is related to undeveloped digestive systems (I tend to agree, because our daughter has had digestive issues from day one). But that is up for debate, because children in other countries do not get colic.

Anyway, there is not a whole lot you can do for colic except keep the baby comfortable, gently massage the baby and just hold her. Hopefully it will pass soon. Some people also say that gripe water works, but I didn't try it so I'm not sure.

Good luck.

Hi Alison! First of all, congrats on finally having that precious little baby!

I have an 18th month old and another one on the way in May, so I know what you're going through - it can be so confusing! I'm certainly no expert, but I'll tell you what I do know and what I've learned from experience:

Regarding feeding...
--She should be taking a ballpark of 40oz of formula per day to meet her nutritional needs, and a 6 to 8 oz bottle is pretty normal. Other than that, if she's drastically reduced her intake I'd talk to her pediatrician about it...

Regarding sleeping (and just to let you know, I was obsessed with helping my son become a good sleeper!)...
--The fussiness between 4p-8p sounds like a baby who is over-tired to me. Most babies still take three naps at her age, and the third nap of the day is often a catnap in the late afternoon.
--What time are you putting her to bed? Sometime between 6pm and 8pm is the best time for a baby that young to be going to bed. My son went to bed at 6:30, and gradually went to bed later and later. He now sleeps from 7:30p-7:30a w/out a peep. Prior to that it was more like 6:30p-7a. He often took a 20-30 minute catnap around 5pm, too. I usually had to hold him to get him to nap at this point, though.
--Do you have a solid bedtime routine in place? For instance: Bottle, followed by bathtime, reading a book, and putting her down in her crib drowsy but awake... We travel a lot and keeping the bedtime routine the same no matter where we go has REALLY helped him sleep well wherever he is.
--Until he was seven months old, we gave him a "dream feed" at 10pm. We went into his room, kept the lights off and gently took him out of his crib and fed him a bottle while he was still partially asleep. He often took the whole bottle - it may or may not have helped him sleep through the night, but regardless of whether it did or didn't help him sleep all night, it did help him meet that 40oz/day of formula.
--For naps, I followed up a bottle with a book, and at 4 months I was still swaddling him in a Swaddle Me blanket for naps and bedtime. Naps are tricky at this age - babies are notorious for getting bitten by the "15 minute nap monster" and sometimes won't nap well at ALL. She should still have a morning nap about two hours after she wakes, and then an afternoon nap about another two or three hours after the morning nap ends. Watch for the early signs of tiredness - eye rubbing, yawning, looking away from you or a toy...
--IF you are comfortable letting her cry, then DO IT. Start with five or ten minutes. If she wakes up after only sleeping for 15 or 20 minutes, let her cry for a few minutes. She might surprise you and fall back to sleep for another hour.... my son often did that, and they really need that sleep to allow their brain to develop. I know that letting a baby "cry it out" is controversial for some and a personal preference, but it worked well for me. Four months is the age where habits begin to form, and I felt that if I consistently rewarded my son's cries by immediately attending to him, he would always cry to get the attention he wanted rather than learning to fall back to sleep on his own.

Hopefully this helps a little... Good luck to you - and believe me, it gets SOOOOO much better!!! I wouldn't be having another if it didn't!
Take care...
jess

It would seem from your post that there are several things going on here. I don't have a clue about the first. Why she would reduce the amount of formula per feeding--have you added cereal yet? Could you get in another of these mini-feeings during the day? Kind of counter the less amount with another feeding to sustain her through the night?
For the second--it would seem she is not now getting enough to go through the night without another feeding. At this point you would expect to start seeing longer stretches of sleep without getting up--not the other way round.
Lastly--sounds a little colic. Two of my three had it. The first cried or fussed (had to be held, rocked, etc) from 7-11 each evening. It was so hard!! The second was about 6-9 each evening. When I spoke to my pediatrician she said, well you are lucky mine had it from 11pm-3am and I was in med school. I have a friend whose little one had it most of the day. I do not know how she survived it!
Hang in there--and ask your pediatrician for advise on all this!!

If she was sleeping through the night before, she is physically able to do it. She's waking because you fed her once and she's formed a habit. Require of her what she already "told" you she can do. Think about it -- if you have a snack at an irregular time one day, don't you get hungry at the same time the next day and the next, until you break the habit. Let her cry. She has to learn to soothe herself to sleep. Good sleep is a lifelong gift. A little crying is worth it. Also consult the book, The Baby Whisperer.

It sounds like your little sweetheart may be ready to start eating some solids. I have an 8 month old son, and we started feeding him rice cereal at 4 months and it really helped him to stay full longer, and sleep longer. Try mixing a tablespoon of dry cereal with her usual formula. At first it is a challenge because she will spit out a lot, but eventually she will learn how to swallow the food from the spoon. Also, your daughter may be starting to get teeth. Most babies start teething around 6 months, but there is a wide variation. This may account for the crankiness in the evening.

hi alison,
everything you're going through with your baby is very normal. i too have a four month old girl. i also have a two year old boy. research shows that most babies still need to wake up and feed during the night until they are about six months old. i'd say to keep feeding her until she reaches that age, then i'd let her cry it out to break the habit.
where does she nap if not in the crib during the day? do you follow the two hour rule during the day? she should go down two hours after she wakes. it makes it so much easier for them to fall asleep. if she still protests the crib, i'm a believer in letting them cry it out. so if you really want her to nap in the crib, i'd let her cry for no more than an hour. do the same routine you do at night for her naps.
and the crankiness during the four to eight hours is TOTALLY normal. i have to put my daughter in a bjorn for the hours while i make dinner. all she wants to do is to be held. my son is also cranky during those times. my friends and i call it the witching hour.
so, all in all, i think you have a very typical four month old. congrats on your baby!
M.

Hi Alison,
I am a mother of two (6 and 3) and they were always great sleepers from the time they were 5 weeks old. The one thing I did was kept them snuggled tightly. Infants enjoy the security of that. I actually took a blanket and rolled it, then put it in a u-shape (similar to the idea of the sleep positioner). Once it was in the u-shape...I put a sheet around it and tucked it underneath and made it like a mini-bed inside the crib. I put the baby right in it and they slept great because the rolled blanket acted like a cushion around their body.
I also started a routine from the VERY beginning, especially at night. They would have bath, play time then bottle...then bed. I did this EVERY night. And I never associated the bottle with the bed. When it was time for bed, I would feed them in a quiet place with the lights down, burp them and put them right in. If they learn to fall asleep on their own from the very beginning...they will become good sleepers. I hope that helps.
Also...it's very normal for babies to have a fussy time in the early evening. For some reason..it always seems to be around dinner time. I just stuck to my routine and they did catch on.
Also, at four months old...she should start with solids. I would start with cereal first, then fruits, then vegetables, then meats. But...as was suggested by my pediatrician...never try more than one food at once. Usually..I did two tablespoons of a new thing for three days to make sure there were no allergies. Then introduced something new. Good Luck!!!!

I had a lot of similar problems with my 5 month old. First, babies are like adults, sometimes they are really hungry and other times they are not. Babies will eat as much as they want too and as long as she isnt' refusing too eat, I would just let how much she feels like eating. Most doctors don't worry about it unless the baby isn't gaining weight. Though teething might be the reason for the change.
As for the sleep issue, My daughter went though the same thing at 4 months and there have been studies showing that at around 4 months, babies regress in there sleeping but than get back on track, maybe due to a mile stone, babies do tend to sleep poorly when they are reaching a develomental milestone. My baby girl regressed and i was frantic about it and wondered what was wrong. she would wake up for a bottle at around 2 and stay awake for 2 hours straight. she would also cry every 10 minutes before falling asleep, i was exhausted but now at 5 months, she sleeps though the night 7pm-6:30 am, everynight, no waking up. My baby girl also sleeps in her crib at night bu tonly her swing during the day for naps but she naps for 3-4 hours a day. I will cross that bridge in a month or so, but i say as long as they get there sleep, that is the most important for their development!!
Good luck!!

Hi Alison,
As far as the sleep goes, your little girl is probably getting fussy at night b/c she should be going to bed much earlier. When they are very young, late bedtimes are common but as they start establishing patterns and taking naps their bedtime becomes much earlier. I suggest putting her to bed at about 6-6:30pm. You may even have to start earlier at first. She should be napping 3 times daily: at about 9 or 10am, 12 or 1 pm and 3 or 4 pm. She should only at this point be awake for 2 hours total in between naps. If she doesn't wake up by 7am, wake her. Then if her first nap is say from 9-10am, her second nap should start at noon. I know it seems backwards, but truly the earlier they go to sleep, the longer they stay asleep and the happier they will be. As for the food, most 4 month old babies do still need 1 or 2 feedings in the middle of the night. It was an exception that yours hasn't before now. I wouldn't worry so much about that. Just feed her if she needs in the night and work on her sleep first. Then, once she is about 6 months old if she is still needing night feedings you can start to sleep train her.
I highly recommend the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth it totally helped me get my 6 month old sleeping better during the day and at night!
Good luck!
R.

Alison

I have 2 kids, 7 and 5. My first is adopted and my second came after 5 years of trying and many miscarriages. My advice for you is to get to a support group. When my daughter came home from Guatemala I felt totally overwhelmed and for the first time in my life really felt like a novice. I started going to the Rockland Parent Child Center in Nyack and there, effortlessly, I discovered the answers to most of my questions. i found myself in a room full of new moms, all great people, and all with as many questions as me. While our babies were developing strong bonds to the other kids, we moms talked about all these issues and gave each other the support to find our own style of mothering. Thing is, everything you've asked about is normal. And each thing holds a number of choices for your style of parenting. It never stops....there are many, many rule books but only you decide how you want to parent your child. There are those who would tell you to leave your child to cry at a certain stage and those who would say bring them into bed with you. I know what my opinion is, but it really is my opinion. If you are in Rockland, find the time to go to the Parent Child Center and you'll find the support you need, not just a lot of one time "advice". It was the ongoing advice that came at me from strangers on the street that made me crazy. True support is another thing...and it was what nurtured me as a new parent and helped me to gain the confidnce I needed to start to find my way to these very personal choices. Good luck and enjoy your wonderful journey!

As for sleep - get "Good Night, Sleep Tight" by Kim West. She discusses the biology of infant sleep and has invaluable sample schedules for every month (babies schedules change constantly in the first year). It sounds to me like she's being fussy at night because she wants to go to sleep. My 2nd baby at that age would cry to go to bed at 7pm and sleep till 6 or 7. When it comes to infants the saying goes, "sleep begets sleep".

As for eating irregular eating patterns are normal but you should check with your pediatrician to make sure. You should be able to call your ped anytime with questions - especially with your first kid. If they act annoyed, get a new pediatrician!

I have a 10 month old and around the same time he started waking up and eating at night. The explanations that I got were first teething. The first tooth isn't suppose to come in till 6 months but they start to feel them much sooner then when they appear. My son always ate less when a tooth was bothering mainly beacuse he hurt to eat. Another thing that is going on at this stage is thier world has bacome so much clearer to them that they don't want to eat during the day because there are so many new things for them to explore. They need the same amount of food intake still though so they make up for it at night. My son had sleep issues. He would only nap in his swing so that is were I put him because if he didn't sleep during the day he would not sleep at night. I think majority of babies have the same fussy time. I had to keep my son busy from 6-8 every night or he was a monster. Eventually I started changing is sleep times so he would take a late nap during his fussy time and then make his bedtime later. I hope this helps. If nothing more you are not alone and it does get better or at least she will get over this period and on to the next stage.

It sounds like she may have started teething. I would talk to your Dr about tylenol, that may do the trick! Good Luck!

Don't feel alone - I have 5 month old twin boys with the same situations. One of them used drink his whole bottle, now it can be anywhere from 3.5 oz to 5 oz. The same one used to sleep from 7 or 8 pm until 5 am. He is killing me now!!! He went to bed last night at 8:30 and woke at 11:30 (took a bottle) and then again at 3:30 am (took another bottle) and he doesn't want to go back to sleep all the time. He has started to roll and just wants to roll around and be on his own. The sleep issue is a problem because I have two of them and just can't get any sleep myself. My other son has colic still (at 5 months). But he has severe Acid Reflux and still has his screaming episodes every night from about 7 or 8 pm until around 10 or 11 pm. We have to walk around with him in the bjorn until he falls asleep. I can totally relate and unfortunately cannot offer any advice, but will look for responses from others as well. Sorry and good luck.
J.

she is old enough for rice cereal now, when they start needing to eat more often that's your hint that they need more than what they are getting, my kids all started wanting to nurse more often...check with your peditrician but I would try feeding the baby rice cereal before bedtime and see if it helps...depending on what time you and your husband wake up each morning I would put her to sleep by 6 or 7 at the latest or give her a late afternoon nap...she needs lots of sleep....I have 5 kids 8yrs and younger and they are all in bed by 7:30 at the latest...growing is hard work! best of luck and congrats!