Fattening up My Daughter

you can add caloriesto her food make cream of wheat with cream boil pastain beef or chicken broth use cream in mac and cheese if she eats grilled cheese butter both sides of the bread. My son is very skinny and hese are tricks we use.We also use carnation instant breakfast. L.

Hi A.,
My 2 yr old ds is like your daughter, except he has now been diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis so we have a reason for the 5th percentile on the growth chart. However in our quest to discover what was going on with him we met with a nutritionist from Mass. Gen. and she gave us a handout on some things to help toddlers gain weight. We learned a lot during our meeting with her and I am happy to share it with you. She also said that our son needed 1000 calories per day at 18 mos. and he was 21lbs then. Now he's 24 lbs. and 27 mos.
Good luck.

This is from the handout. Written by Catie Hanley, MS, RD

If your child is underweight it is important to remember that, while it is difficult for them to consume a larger volume of food, you can increase the calories they get with each bite. Most every bite should be packed with calories. Juice, even though it is liquid with calories, can often interfere with appetite and should be eliminated from the diet of a child who is not gaining weight.

Some young children do well "grazing" on food through the day. They will eat a few bites here and there and still consume enough food to gain eight appropriately. Many toddlers and young children, however, do not gain weight eating this way and need to be on a more structured meal plan.

* Meals and snacks should be offered at scheduled times through the day at the same table or high chair when possible. Allow 2+1/2 to 3 hours between meals and snacks.
*Allow 20-30 min. for meals and 15 min. for snacks. If you child signals that she is finished, end the meal and do not offer additional choices or dessert. She will make up the missed calories later in the day.
*Eliminate juice. Offer only water between meals and snacks.
*Offer solids before liquids unless a supplement like Pediasure is used at snack time.
*Add oil, butter or margarine to all possible foods. Use1 tsp. of oil per each 4 oz (1/2 cup) serving of pureed fruits, vegetables or mixed cereals.
*Be creative when trying to add calories. Butter can be hidden under cheese on pizza. Make mashed potatoes with cream and extra butter instead of milk. Add cream to full fat yogurt.
*Limit pieces of fresh or canned fruit to very small amounts at the end of a meal. All vegetables should have calories added with butter, oil or cheese.
*If not using Pediasure or Carnation Instant Breakfast, heavy cream can be added to whole milk for calories. 1/2 oz. of heavy cream plus 7 oz whole milk provides 30 calories per ounce. Premium ice cream can be added to milk for a high calorie milk shake.
*When introducing a new food, offer one or two of your child's accepted food and put a small amount of the new food with it. It may take 7-20 tries before the new food is accepted so you need to persevere.
*Some children have marked taste preferences. Pay close attention to foods your child prefers. Some like strong, savory flavors, others prefer bland foods and others like sweet food. Children will eat a variety of flavors but if they tend to prefer yogurt, lemon flavored foods, or salsa, for example, you may want to offer new foods with similar flavors such as lemon flavored hummus or coffee flavored ice cream.
*Texture issues may interfere with your child's intake. Some children will eat only soft or crunchy foods but avoid mixed textures or chewy foods. You can work with your dietitian or speech pathologist to help advance textures.

Never force feed your child. If you feel this is necessary, talk with your dietitian about behavioral issues that contribute to this problem.

Never use food as a reward or withhold a food (such as dessert) as punishment. This will lead to long term feeding problems.

Recommended reading: How to Get Your Kid to Eat...by Ellyn Satter

I would NOT give her Ensure. Those products are filled with emulsifiers and things that are hard to digest. I would absolutely talk to Joanne H - Reliv Kids Now has helped thousands of kids, including those with really compromised immune systems and even living in extreme poverty in 3rd world countries. I know a lot of children who are underweight, have digestive issues (reflux, constipation), or allergy issues (food allergies, even asthma) who have benefited. It's a phenomenal product and will make your situation really so much easier to address in a SAFE way.

Yes, I would let her snack all day. If that's how she will eat, then great! Just keep the snacks around all the time so she will get as many as possible. Coconut oil is a healthy fat that tastes mild. You could add it to Mac and cheese, or anything warm. Also, you may want to check on a wheat allergy as someone else mentioned. If someone has Celiac disease (extremely wheat allergic) the wheat is causing their intestines not to absorb good things from the food. This is definitely worth looking into - you can ask your doc for a blood test.

Our friends daughter is the same way, she always tells me she'd love to take a little bit of our kids eating habbits and give it to hers. Her daughter was very picky and didn't eat a whole lot until about 2 1/2. She is finally at about the 15%. This is a first. For a long time she mixed whole milk and 1/2 and 1/2 so she got the extra calories/fat. At 2 1/2 she's back down to whole milk only. It was hard but rather than trying to get her to eat 3 meals a day she would let her snack all day, she will grow out of it. At 2 1/2 she is eating meals again and eating snacks. It was worse when she was teething or sick because she didn't want to eat. Oddly it would always happen before a well baby so she would weigh in light due to not eating much. She pretty much gave her antyhgin she would eat, including a small bowl of ice cream after dinner. She snacked on tons of fruit, breakfast bars, etc. Once her daughter had gained a few lbs and came to expect the ice cream she then started making her eat meals with the family and cut out the ice cream. She's been eating regular meals and snacking for a couple of months now and she's been able to cut back out most of the fatty/extra calorie items because just like the rest of us moms, she didn't want her daughter to get to much bad food. At the time it was about getting anything she could in her because she was super skinny.

I will also say you should check the charts. When she looks at her daughters height vs. weight she is totally normal. It's the weight vs. age that she struggles with. I also agree that it is related to genetics, they are both shorter and have smaller kids. My husband and I are taller and have bigger/taller kids. Their daughter is 2 1/2, 26 lbs 15%, and 34 1/2 inches tall. Our daughter is 1 1/2, 23 lbs 45%, and 33 1/2 inches tall. When they are side by side you wouldn't know they are a year a part. Their son is 7 1/2 and 48 inches tall and 48 lbs, our son is 3 1/2 and 43 inches tall and 43 lbs. Genetics play a big roll.

Take a look at height vs. weight and if she's doing ok then don't stress to much. Try and feed her good things, oh and fiber anytime you can, she will get past this and move to a more regular eating schedule. Good luck.

Hi A.,
First of all, please do not look at the weight chart. The national averages for children's weight and height are always changing. What's normal some body types is not for others! There's nothing wrong with your daughter being thin as long as she is healthy.
Second, do not try to "fatten" up your daughter with foods that might not necessarily be good for her! Nutrition is soooo very important to our kids. What they eat is a direct reflection of their health.
Third, make breakfast/lunch/dinner for the family. period. She should eat what you make even if she may not like it. Did you know it takes at least 10 exposures to foods before kids may start to like it??? Kids don't know what foods are best for them (especially at such a young age)... parents do. If it was up to her would you let her eat mac and cheese everyday all day because it's the only thing she "likes"? It will be hard, but you know best, not her. Just keep in mind that you're doing for her own good. By all means, make it fun, make it silly, make food together, present it in a fun way, but make sure it contains fruits, veggies and proteins that she needs to stay healthy and strong. It's the best thing you can do for her.
Hope this helps,
E.

Hi A.,
I also have a hard time getting my daughter to eat, but for me it is a bit more serious because it is not genetics ( I wish!) and she actually lost a considerable amount of weight because she wasn't eating - SO I had to take it seriously and find methods to get her interested in food. It doesn't sound as serious for you, but still I sense you'd like to do something or you wouldn't have posted your entry. So, for what it's worth, I did the following - first I try to take my daughter shopping every 2 or 3 weeks at the grocery store and we walk around the store looking for interesting foods or foods she hasn't had in awhile that we've forgotten about. If she picks it out, she's likely to try to eat it. (She knows I won't allow stuff that's not healthy - not candy bars, for example. I let her ask and then I look at the ingredients and I get the final veto) Second, I agree with letting her snack. If my daughter doesn't eat a snack when she's hungry, it never ever makes her eat more by dinner time. In fact, I think she eats less. What she says - and I believe her from my own experience - is that "I WAS hungry earlier, but I'm not hungry any more now." I think your stomach just gives up, thinks you aren't going to feed it, and shrinks in size. I know when I'm dieting, the first day or two is tough, but then my stomach figures I'm not going to feed it and it stops getting hungry. So let her snack. Third, I think the chocolate milk or strawberry milk is a good option. Fourth, I have resorted to Pediasure and similar products - they are expensive however. And I find she gets sick of them. Fifth - this has been a bit of a Godsend, we let her have Nutella. We call it her "chocolate" sandwich - which sounds so sinful she wants to eat it. What we do is mix it half Nutella and half peanut butter, but we mix it all together so it still looks and smells completely like chocolate (but tastes more like a Reese's peanut butter cup - she says it tastes better with the peanut butter added than without). I figure it's no worse than peanut butter and Fluff or p.b. and jelly - in fact a little better because the Nutella at least has some protein. She also dips apple slices in it. So far, that's her favorite food. Sixth - as a kid who had a completely different palette than her parents (there are such things as "super tasters" who taste food differently than others), I can totally relate to her not liking the tastes of the foods we're having for dinner. If she'd rather have a bowl of Cheerios with milk for supper - what's the harm? Anyway, those are the things I've found so far that have helped. Good luck!

Does she liek eggs? scrambeled? you can put cheese in them, ice cream and chocolate milk, does she like crecent rolls (Pillsbury?) you can cook one with cheese and turkey in it?? My osn is in the 25% and you cna see eveyr rib (he is 7) so I give him extra stuff, but he also lieks carrotts and healthy food. Our family also has extra skinny small genes, my niece is 6 and looks 4 1/2 and wears a 4 too! hang in there if she was too chunky they would comment too. She is your petit flower

My youngest is on the small side too. Our pediatrican recommended sticking with whole milk, putting butter on everything and if hes not getting enough veggies n fruits to give half of a vitamin daily.

My mother asked the doctor much the same thing about me. "Don't worry about it!" he said. "When she's hungry, she'll eat. She's not going to starve." Unfortunately, Mum was temperamentally unable to use this advice, and kept on worrying and trying to make me eat, making me stay at the table until I had finished, etc. Eventually, I did grow into a good appetite, which I assume would have happened anyway. I'm 72 now, and look somewhat younger, being small and slender. My advice: let her snack, offering things you know she likes, as long as they're healthy food. Make your regular mealtimes enjoyable for everybody, with conversation and togetherness, whether or not she's actually eating with you. When others are eating things they think are especially good, she probably will want to try them too, some day. As for people making comments, you may as well just say, "Yes, I was the same way at her age - and look at me now!"

M

Hi A.,
Try not to worry. My daughter was in the 3rd percentile at her 2nd checkup. They wanted me to try and "fatten" her up too. She has and still does eat a good variety of foods, just not a lot of them. She had moved up to the 15th percentile at her 3 year and I did not do any of the recommended things to fatten her up because I saw most of it as unhealthy. My son on the other hand was a very picky eater and was in the 5th at his 2 year. He's now 5 and was in the 40th at his last checkup, but still very thin because he is very tall. With us it is genetics all the way. My husband and I were both really thin as children and our kids are the same. I used to make something special for my son to eat at 2, but not anymore. He knows he has to have 4 bites of whatever meat we are eating and he usually eats the vegetable and rice or whatever else we are having no problem. But we only started that when he was 4. When he was around 3 I started getting tired of being a short order cook and told him he could have oatmeal or yogurt if he did not like what we were having. The best advice I ever got was to not make mealtimes a battle, because you won't win! Good luck!

I know how stressful this can be my daughter was born in the fifth percentile for weight - in utero issues and didn't make her weight at 1 year and dropped to the "below 3%" at that point. Now at 26 months she is still under the 3%. She too has her favorites and isn't adventurous in the least with food. She has some texture issues with certain foods and just won't eat them.
Somethings I have tried and have worked for us are hidding tofu and veggies in her mac-n-cheese. My daughter does eat mashed potatoes so I have that to work with as well. (Have you tried putting a cream sauce over mashed potatoes for your daughter?) But even if you are just working with mac-n-cheese can you cut up the tofu really small and hide it in the bowl. I also cut up the frawns of broccoli or cut cooked carrots really small and put them into the mac-n-cheese as well.
Will your daughter eat pasta with tomato sauce on it? You might be able to hide a lot in the tomato sauce as well.
Have you tried cheese sticks? My daughter only likes the Sargento Colby-Jack. A friend of hers only likes the Trader Joes cheddar. Both of these cheese taste better than a lot of other brands - they taste like really cheese not processed cheese.
Have you tried drinkable yogurts? YoBaby makes a full fat one and I know I've seen the banana flavor recently in the stores. You can also make your own smoothies if she likes them. I used to make them with whole fat vanilla ice cream (the frozen yogurt was always fat free) full fat milk and fruit - any kind your daughter likes. You can thin or thickness it up to the thickness she likes and let her eat it with a straw - even more fun.
The feeding specialist we saw also said Carnation instant breakfast drink with whole milk. It actually has less sugar than Pediasure and it's cheaper.
With she eat scrambled eggs? My daughter loves them with a slice of Kraft cheese in them and cooked in a little olive oil - funny but if it isn't in the olive oil she doesn't like it as much. We've also done poached eggs where she dips toast with full fat butter on it into the drippy yolk. Or an ometel. Egg salad made with full fat mayo if she will eat it. I've tried putting the egg salad in a bowl and giving my daughter wheat crackers so she can dip the cracker into the egg and pick some up and eat it that way - she thinks it's more fun that way.
Have you tried hummus? Some flavors they like better than others. My daughter will only occasional eat this but it has to be the red pepper hummus on wheat crackers. She also likes the processed cheese Alouette. She likes that or even just cream cheese on crackers.
Will she eat pancakes, waffles or french toast? My daughter loves banana pancakes or blueberry and cinnamon raisin french toast. We read the book "If you give a pig a pancake" and it is really funny to watch the pig eat his pancake - not that we lick the plate but we use the pancake to soak up all that good maple suryp. Sometimes my daughter likes to walk around eating these items in the morning instead of sitting at the table. She also likes cinnamon raisin toast with butter or cream cheese.
Will your daughter eat raisins? Can you add them to her cream of wheat to get in some iron? My daughter likes raisins but also dried bing cherries. I get them from Trader Joes and although I think they can be sour sometimes she really likes them.
Have you tried sunflower butter - not peanut butter - I get it in Trader Joes. Maybe your daughter will eat it with a banana. Just a thought.
A couple of things to think about if you aren't doing so already is
-does your daughter eat her meals with you or by herself? We find our daughter eats better if she eats at the same time as us - with us at the table. When she isn't eating what we are she sometimes asked for what we are eating which is the start of trying more things to eat and expanding there taste buds.
-do you try and give your daughter what you are eating first? then if she refuses it, go to a favorite?
Snacks. I don't know what snacks you are giving her but have you tried just giving her fruit as snack time. Not goldfish or a cracker item? Just a thought. Maybe something light will go thru her quicker and she will still be hungry for the next meal. Even if it's just a little drinkable yogurt or milk.

Hope this helps and remember she isn't starving and hopefully it's just a faze that with the consistent introduction of new foods she will get over. Or we can just hope.

Good luck,
L. M

my son is in the `00th percentile of height for his age, and the 5th percentile for weight. Both my chidren look dangerously thin, but they are healthy. We do not give them fatty foods or processed foods just to fatten them up. They are energetic and growing, if thin. They are smart, not lethargic and show no signs of malaise or failure to thrive so we just accept that their bodies know exactly what to do and how to be and our brains can't beat that. We instill healthy eating habits in them. No junk, if we can help it.

Our job is to make sure they know how to and have the discipline to make heathy choices as adults.

So they don't look like other kids. They're skinny. Most kids around here are fat. That's not better.

IF your daughter is otherwise healthy, I'd just push a plan of healthy choices, eat when you're hungry.

Good luck.

You sound exactly like me 4 years ago! My daughter is still teeny for her age, but has grown into the 10th percentile at age 6, so we're doing ok. People can be so insensitive, can't they? When folks make rude comments, I say "Isn't it amazing how different kids can be from one another?" Both of my kids are on the small side, and I love having little peanuts.

I know how stressed out you are feeling right now, and I hate wasting food too. Take a deep breath and remember that your daughter will not starve! She WILL eat when she's hungry, and it's perfectly normal for kids to go through these food jags. If you continue to offer her healthy, varied choices, lots of fruits and veggies, she'll learn healthy habits.

My advice to you is to continue to offer your daughter new foods at mealtimes. Experts say you have to offer something more than 20 times before a child will try it and like it. Keep it up! If you limit her to the foods she already likes, she will not learn to like other foods, and she won't get the balanced diet she needs. In our house the rule is you have to take one bite of everything on your plate (and if I'm making something new and different, I make sure one thing on the plate is something she'll love - just so I can be sure she's eaten something).

At dinnertime especially, try offering one food on her plate at a time. When my daughter was younger, she felt overwhelmed by a whole plateful of food (and I hated throwing it out afterward!) We gave her one "course" ate a time and she did much better. Another option is to serve her with a tablespoon. Start with literally one tablespoon of each food. She'll feel in better control of her choices, and you won't waste as much. She may even surprise you by asking for second helpings!

I'm not sure why, but multi-vitamins seemed to help my daughter's appetite. When I remembered to give them to her consistently, she seemed to eat more. Also, we had her on Pediasure shakes to give her extra calories. We kept her on whole milk, too. We also butter everything for her - I use Smart Balance because it's low-fat, high in Omega-3s and has no trans fat. She once asked "can I have butter on my bacon?" We drew the line there! :)

My daughter was the same way with snacks, so I would limit them, and make sure they were full of protein and low-sugar. Cheese sticks and Yobaby (made with whole fat milk) were staples in our house. I'd serve snacks at the kitchen table or counter, so she's not walking around with a bag of goldfish for hours on end. That may help with her appetite at mealtimes.

Hope this helps! Feel free to contact me if you have any more questions!

Hi A.,

I totally relate ... I was just like your daughter as a young child and I remember those comments! Happy to say we grow out of those phases. In the meantime, please take a look at my website www.juiceplus.com/+ck49780 and click on the link to what the experts say ... Dr. William Sears (renowned pediatrician), 9 Simply Steps to a Healthier Family Diet where he talks about grazing. I think you'll find this helpful

My very best,
C.

have you tried using ensure? if she'll drink it straight (best if cold) or use it as the milk in her cereal, or the milk to make the mac n cheese etc. or mix it with some icecream and make a frappe.

Our daughter will be 2 next week and is in the 7th percentile for weight, and I think I have your twin ; ) I would say my daughter eats about 2 real meals a day on average (unless she's in a growth spurt), picking at the rest.

A few snacks we have found helpful are avocado, sweet potatoes (keep them in cubes if poss), yogurt, and smoothies with protein powder. We drink smoothies ourselves, we put in carrot, banana, frozen fruit, a healthy fruit juice (a la trader joe's w/o sugar), and protein powder. Sometimes we put yogurt in place of an ingredient. She LOVES her smoothies and always sucks them down, we put them in a different sippy cup. It does fill them up like a meal, so if she is being picky and won't eat, try a smoothie.

I have also found that her food tastes change rapidly every few months, hot dogs were IT, now they are not, same with vegetables, fruit, etc. Keep trying new foods, and re-introducing old ones. We make a dish up and divvy it into 3 or 4 small tupperware containers in the freezer with portioned side dishes and meals for her. Once we defrost each little container, we try it on her a few times. If she's not liking it, we try one more time, but more importantly we leave the remaining containers in the freezer for a few weeks and re-try. Sometimes it's just the mood she's in. It helps keep down the food tossing amount.

We also lead with the food we want her to eat most first, if she's hungry she'll eat it. Then we add side dishes to that once she's rolling.

As I'm sure you already know as long as she's growing and your Pedi is OK, it's fine. But that doesn't help with the remarks.

Good luck!

I agree with the mom who said let her eat whenever she's hungry. Make sure that what you offer her is healthy (with the occasional treat, of course) and if you can offer her a more calorric option, like whole milk, whole-milk cheese, etc., then do that. Encourage food over drinks (which can be filling and less nutrient-rich).

Regarding mealtimes, I encourage you to have her join you at the table even if she doesn't want to eat b/c she isn't hungry from having had something earlier. It's the social/family-building time that you also want to instill. And, in the future, when you feel better about her eating habits and have cut off her grazing so much, she'll have the habit of sitting to eat because she'll have done it with you anyway.

I'm sure the MD has advised you to make sure she takes a multivitamin...

I won't tell you to try not to worry; all moms worry!

Good luck.

My son was at one point "failure to thrive" - is that not the worst name ever. He is now 3 & 10 % for weight. Take a look at a old growth chart from the 70's what is now 5% was like 30%- everyone is just happy to overweight babies these days. As long as she does not keep dropping on the chart don't worry. Her taste bubs will change & so will her appitate- Don't make a big deal out of it. Good luck. M.

My sister's daughter (who is now 14 and perfectly healthy) was that way as well. Just a little peanut who could not put on weight. She finally started giving Ashley 'boost-n-juice' to really amp up the calories. Basically she would be boost drink (it comes in all sorts of flavors) and mix it with juice and Ashley would drink that from a sippy cup. She did this until about 6 yo or so. She would also encourage ice cream and bacon, things that were high fat. Ashley has a beautiful body and has always maintained a slim figure, so I think most of it was simply her body type. The b-n-juice really seemed to help - at least for my sister feeling like she was getting enough nutrition. Hopes this helps and good luck!

What ever you do, try to concentrate on healthy foods. Don't try to fill her diet with fatty unhealthy foods. At night before bed and on an empty stomach, try whole milk (warmed) and add some "pure" maple syrup. It's good and will norish her through the night. Also, Look for high quality protein and vitamin shakes. Add fresh fruit to them in a blender. She should like them. Milk is best warm and not to eat with salty foods, like dinner or lunch. Have these shakes in between meals. Cold milk shakes are OK too. Warm is better though.
Almond butter is better than peanutbutter. Ghee and olive oil is wonderful for her good oils. Whole milk yogurts, avacado's, bananas, home-made apple pies, freshly ground cinamon on toast with ghee or butter, scrambled eggs with melted cheese on them.
Make yourself a list of ideas that people have written to you. You will find something that works. Just don't give up. Children's appetites and tastebuds change.
Good Luck!
S.

I know exactly where you're coming from. My daughters are on the small side too and my sisters and I were all skinny as girls. People used to ask my mom if we were bulimic when we would actually eat everything under the sun. So, alot of it is genetics and she just has a higher metabolism. You could give her pediasure or put some ovaltine or carnation breakfast mix in her milk. As far as dinners we just give them what we're eating. If they don't eat it all the first time then we save it and heat it up later or give bites off the table.

Hi A.
You know its really funny that I never thought of being called skinny as an insult! I was always battling too much weight-so skinny was a dream!!
Thanx for pointing that out!
Now for you daughter. Reliv Kids Now is a completely balanced Shake for all ages. It comes in vanilla and chocolate and can be mixed in any liquid or food (yogurt, pancakes etc). It will also help balance your daughter's immune system which cannot be done with just our diet.
Happy to share. If it can take a nutritionally starved child in Haiti back to health-it can certainly help our kids.
Good luck
J. H