SO last night we were watching (one of the few times we ever get to watch tv) Wipeout. My husband was laughing hysterically at some of the things happening. Our daughter (6) became very upset that he was laughing at people falling down. I'm so glad that she doesn't want to make fun of people and finds that it's not right to do. So don't get me wrong here. I am so proud to know that if she can stand up to her dad and say "Dad, That is not nice to laugh at people, it's hurtful"...that maybe just maybe she would have the courage to do so in public or at school.
However, we were watching for pure enjoyment and a good laugh. I told her that the reason this show is on is to give people a chance to laugh sometimes and that these people go on this show knowing full well that they will be laughed at. She just couldn't understand why anyone would do that. I don't want to tell her there is a huge monetary value in for them, but I don't want her to think that these individuals are wanting to get sympathy from her either.
How would you handle this?
Thanks Momma L...I like the clown idea. She will definetely be able to understand that. Thank you, she is by far the sweetest, most caring individual I know!
I don't think it's not kid friendly, she has to learn sometime that people do things that are out of the norm. We dont' necessarily watch a lot of TV, as we are usually not home in the early evening (before 7pm)...just so happens last night we were. I have shows I enjoy and watch via Hulu 1) as not age appropriate 2) I'm so busy with Girl Scouts and Soccer that I'm never home on a week night. We don't have have TIVO.
We used to only have NetFlix and not even any cable...I would love to go back to those days!
Thank you all I love all the different views and appreciate all the comments!
Well, it goes back to what is age appropriate. What time were you watching the show? Keep kid friendly programs on so to avoid this dilemma. :)
Your daughter is six - you tried to explain to her why people would make fools of themselves (to make money) and she didn't understand...I would Tivo the show and watch it after she goes to bed.
I think it's GREAT that she stood up to her Daddy and told him what he was doing was wrong (in here eyes)...while you and I know that the show is MEANT for people to laugh...like people do stand-up comedy for laughs - these typical people go on the show for laughs and to hopefully earn $50K....
While the people are REAL - they are going to TRY and make money and also get their 15 minutes of fame.....they don't want her sympathy - they want her to cheer them on and laugh!
Has she ever seen a clown get a pie thrown in his face? Old, slapstick comedy. It's how these people choose to entertain others and themselves, and it's also their jobs. Why not tell her they are competing for a prize? Like a talent show. Certainly she can understand that. That is basically what this reality show is. If she can't wrap her head around it, don't watch it in front of her. I think her attitude and heart is certainly in the right place though, what a sweet girl.
I may be alone here, but I have to agree with your daughter. My husband & I don't find any of those type of shows funny at all...I think people have become way to desensitized to watching pain as entertainment. I would absolutely not let children under the age of 13 watch any of that...It just sends the wrong message. Think about it this way...if any of the things that happen on that show happened right in front of you, would you stand there laughing or find it funny in any way? Good for your daughter for knowing right from wrong! You should be proud of her. I can totally understand why she would be confused by your finding it funny!
Edit: Okay...I just realized which show you actually meant and I don't think there are actually injuries involved that people are laughing at. I still wouldn't let her watch it, but that one is not as bad as even some of the America's Funniest Videos where people get really hurt or some of those other horrible shows that have fairly violent videos of accidents (can't think of the names of the shows). I don't find those the least bit funny, but apparently a lot of people do!
She sounds so sweet. This is a great learning moment for her. Laughing with people vs. laughing at people..
Remind her, these people want to be there.
They try out, they are interviewed, they have a physical and they have a chance to win money.
It is like actors that are on comedy shows..
Obviously these people also like the attention.. so they know what they are doing and how they look and that people are laughing with them..
Notice they are all smiling even when they do not do well..
It is different than if someone was walking down the street and tripped and fell. We would not laugh, we would run up to assist them and make sure they are ok..
Tell her the truth, some people really enjoy being silly. Yeah they are falling down but look how they are falling down. God those shows look like such fun to me! I wish I wasn't so old. :(
Does she like playing in mud or at least have a friend that does? It is like that, with a camera on you. I suppose if you have a girly girl she may never understand. Nothing wrong with being a girly girl it is just they can't really understand how being dirty is good fun. :)
How would I handle this?
I'd record the show and replay it after she has goe to bed. One of the best things about recording it is you can fast forward through the commercials.
I've gotten to where I resord shows I want to watch so I can fast forward through the commercials. A 2 hour movie is usually 90 minutes when you fast forward through the commercials. AND that's nice.
The bad part . . . I sat and watched the evening news and was so impatient when the commercials came on. I've become addicted to commercial free TV.
Good luck to you and yours.
Some people like and understand The Three Stooges.
And other people never like them.
The slap stick seems so mean - but, it's entertainment.
It could be your daughter might never care for it much.
It may seem that I am going a bit deep on a light subject, but I find situations like this to be very rich teachable moments. So, for those who are interested, I thought I would take a moment to explore this as a parenting challenge.
We, as adults, often think in terms of 'explaining' things to a child so they can 'understand'. As adults we intellectualize concepts. I work with children and parents on a regular basis. In my experience I find that children want models of behaviors more than they want concepts. They also need parents to help them discover which virtues within will guide them in the situations life presents. It sounds to me like your daughter felt confused about her father's behavior in a particular situation and felt he was not using his virtues.
I love that you naturally honored that she used her honesty and her audacity. In such a situation, the first thing I would do is tell her that I really liked that she was using those virtues. Then I would take on the role of her partner in learning and say, "But you know, I think I might show more humility if I was talking to my father who has so much to teach me. Maybe, instead of assuming he is unkind, we could ask him why he does not feel it is unkind to laugh at people falling down on the tv show when he first show his thoughtfulness and caring if someone really fell down and hurt themselves."
This way, you are demonstrating humility and courtesy. We do want our children to have courage and to speak up, but if they do so without humility and courtesy, they will be perceived as arrogant, disrespectful, or even impudent and will likely get frustrated thinking that honesty and courage won't work for them.
Then, with the help of Dad you can help her learn to laugh at herself and to better understand why people, such as clowns and actors, pretend just so we can have the chance to laugh at ourselves. We know the actors are not really hurt, so we don't need to use our sympathy and we can use our humor to enjoy that that comedians help us to find joy in life. It also takes courage to be able to laugh at oneself! When people show us that they can fall and laugh about it, it reminds us that we don't have to take everything so seriously and that sometimes it actually helps us to heal from our injuries if we are laughing.
Then I would reinforce this concept with action. I would show the child how much I enjoy laughing at myself in a way that encourages my spirit rather than in a way that insults my dignity. We don't want to demonstrate self humiliation and give others to laugh at us disrespectfully. But, for example, if I put a good deal of effort into doing something a certain way and it failed to work out, I could demonstrate how humor can encourage me to use my endurance to start over instead of giving in to feelings of frustration. I might get a silly expression on my face and say something like, "Well now, that did not serve my noble goals, now did it? I guess I'll have to use my intelligence and creativity to find an even more intelligent way of doing this!"
In life, we fall down a lot in many ways. One of the best things we can learn to do is to laugh as soon as we can! Those who develop the instincts to see the humor in life as it unfolds usually have the strength to keep going when others just give in to frustration.
aww just hug that one will ya! So sweet I love it. Don't try to change that in anyway. What a gentle spirit and loving heart she has. Be proud momma!
