I mailed a box of 4 or 5 toys to my child. She spoke of 2 of them. This is the first box of toys I have ever mailed her. It was awkward bc she mentioned these couple of toys and I told her I sent those to her, and she told me they just randomly appeared as if from Santa Claus. She was surprised they were from me. What should I say to my ex before her birthday and Christmas to ensure she knows she is remembered? I'm not much into material things, but I do want her to know she is cared about.
I would just tell her. When you talk with her tell her you sent her something then ask her to tell you when she gets it.
I would do exactly what Melissa said. I'd casually mention to my child to be looking out for a box in the mail if I got to talk to her before hand .... and then the next time I talked to her I'd again mention it and ask her if she liked and name exactly what it was that you sent. That way if he didn't mention who it was from she'll now know or if someone else took credit for it again she'll now know.
It is very important no matter what happened that your child know that you do think about her, love her, miss her so I'd make darn sure she knew I sent her gifts.
well guess if i were in your shoes-instead of doing a power pull with the ex..start investing in savings bonds-or open a savings account for her and put xtra cash in for her-it will be great for her 18th or 20th birthday to have a lil nest egg to start out with.send her bday cards,xmas cards-that way if she doesnt get them-no big loss,no power struggle etc.and she will.see that you really did care-but in a different way.good luck
How old is she? It's not unusual for kids to forget who sent them what in a box. My 3 yr old likes to remember who gave her what. The only reason I know it is important to her to remember is because she asks me regularly "who gave me this?" then goes on about how nice it is that they gave it to her and that they gave it to her because they love her, etc. But she may ask me about the same item the following week. She understands the love behind the gifts, but she just can't remember everything. I think there's probably nothing to worry about there.
Dragonflower has a good point. It may be too upsetting for her.
If you are sure that that is NOT the case, then just tell him like you told us - you want her to know that she is remembered and that it really is in her best interests to know that. There is nothing worse for a child than wondering if their parent remembers them, likes them, loves them!
Your ex did give her the toys so your title is bit off. You haven't mentioned how old she is, at least in the posts I've read. Perhaps if he talks w/ her too much about you it's upsetting to her so he just puts the toys out for her. From what you wrote, it's not like he took the credit for buying them, he just put them out.
