"Early" Potty Training

i have a 3 1/2 year old son and an 18 month old daughter. With both kids before i would bathe them i would take their clothes off and put them on the potty starting at 6 months.They would almost always go.My son was pooping on the potty completely by 9 months. He was potty trained but then got sick for months(whole other story:()by 12 months. He ended up being completely potty trained by 2 1/2.My daughter for some reason would stay dry through the night starting at 6 months so i took advantage of that.She has been completely trained for 5 weeks now. My suggestions are pay attention to if they have a schedule and start like that.

You sound like me. My daughter is 10 months and is about to start standing on her own/walking etc. I've decided for her birthday, if not sooner we're going to get a potty. I will bring her to the bathroom when I need to go and show her that mommy goes on the potty and try to get her to sit on her potty.

This seemed to work for my friend and she was potty trained before the age of 2. Although lately she said they have had some mess ups, we think its due to acting out because my friend is expecting.

Hi S.,

My children were not potty trained until they were older since they were clearly not interested in potty training until then but I do have a couple of friends who were able to get their children potty trained by the time they were two and it seemed their success was basically due to a whole lot of determiniation, "a no going back" attitude, and making sure that you are setting up the situation for success. Here's my suggestions for when you feel your child is ready for potty training:

1) Once you decide to potty train, get rid of the diapers and pull ups completely during the day (you can explain that the pull ups are special for night). Those pull ups make kids lazy.

2) Make sure that you get a child to the bathroom at frequent intervals until you get a sense of his timing and he seems to be catching on.

3) Keep a portable potty in the back of your car and a fold-up potty seat insert in your diaper bag so that he can go to the bathroom while you are out and about.

4) Don't sweat the stand up vs. sitting down peeing issue right now. It was easier for me to teach my son to pee sitting down and that natuarlly sequed to standing up on its own.

5) Those sticker charts are great for motivation but nothing beats a parent's the top enthusiasm when there's pottying success.

Good luck.

Hi S.--I have had 5 kids, 4 of which were potty trained within 2-3 days (from diapers to underwear), my 5th is 23 months old and likes to sit on the potty chair--but is not ready to use it yet. He tries, when HE WANTS to, but so far nothing--no big deal. This is the key--they HAVE to be ready and if you apply no pressure and allow them to take the lead with some gentle suggestions (do you want to sit on the potty?)you will be successful. If you notice from all your other posts--those that started training so early actually went at least a month--in some cases 3-4 months until it was actually complete. That is really ridiculous--who has time to sit in the house for that long waiting for your child to pee. And if you are trying it that early and it is taking that long--it is confusing to them too--being in and out of diapers all day (when you have to leave the house or go to sleep)does nothing to expedite the process. I left the potty out so my kids could get used to it and become interested in it and THEY decided when they wnated to try. As soon as they gave me enough signs, we put ourselves on "house arrest" for a couple of days--so we could really concentrate on it (which becomes more difficult with the more kids you have--but we found a way). 3 days was the max that it took one of my kids to get it and they were all trained between the ages of 2.2-2.6 months!! Be very careful with this issue--your child is very different than you were and you are not the same parent as your mom. I have had friends that pressed the issue with their kids instead of waiting for them to give the go ahead (after all it is THEIR body--would you like it if someone tried to make you do something with your body that you didn't want to?) and it took months--not fun. I totally am not trying to sound snippy, but kids have control over pretty much nothing at this age--they should at least have control over what they want to do with their own bodies. I promise if you wait until your son is really ready--you can get it done in a matter of days. Trust me, when you see how fast he is going to grow up---you will miss those days of having a baby in diapers--my oldest is 9--my youngest almost 2 and it has gone by in a blink. I am just saying--don't put too much stress on yourself about this--it'll happen and it doesn't have to be a big deal. Don't run your life around getting him trained by a certain age--age doesn't mean anything--his own readiness does. Good luck--D.

I thought this pediatrician's website explained some factors for successful potty training. Readiness and maturity are key factors. There is a list of behaviors that outline a child's "readiness".
I caution others to not force the issue too early if the child doesn't seem to be responding to the methods of sitting on the potty. With my first son I tried around 18 mos and nothing happened, he hadn't learned to listen to his body's clues obviously. I realize now he was not ready and when he was two and a half things progressed much quicker and easier, with fewer accidents.
anyway I think you can be too forceful if your not sensitive to your child so I encourage you to read the advice on the website. http://www.drgreene.com/21_1455.html

Are you going to raise your son exactly as you and your husband were raised? Do everything your parents did on exactly the same timetable? Create another financial advisor? No matter what, stick to your schedule. Do not pay any attention to the multitude of experts who say not to even think about potty training until a girl is 2 1/2 and a boy is 3. Do not allow for common sense on your part or individual development on his part. Does that sound rational?

First off... it's really funny how much we have in common. My daughter turned 2 in Aug, I have my MBA and have been working part time as well!
I agree that Elizabeth M that Laura D's answer was the best... :-)
We bought a potty for our daughter when she was about 9 months old because we were shocked that she pooped and crawled to the diaper drawer and came and gave me a diaper (and the fact I was potty trained by my 1st birthday really pushed me). We gave it a try ever few months but she wasn't ready.. until 18 months. All 5 steps that Laura described were what got us to accomplish our goal. No joke.

1. I never understood the point of pull-ups... it IS a diaper... there really is no difference because at this stage they can't really pull their own underwear off and on anyway.

2. We tried every hour.

3. Keeping the portable potty with you in the car is just more sanitary than taking your kid to dirty scary public bathrooms anyway. Just pull over.. it was kinda fun for my daughter too.. she thought it was hilarious!

4. Sitting down works best for boys (I have 2 brothers much much younger than me so I remember their potty training days)--and ensures they don't splash everywhere

5. The sticker reward system is the best... but make sure you use something your son likes. When we initially tried the stickers thing we used all different kinds. She just got a sticker evertime she went. But what worked the best was the sesame street chart and reward stickers.

--also.... get books like 'elmo goes potty' and everbody poops.. and keep them in the bathroom...

Just stick to it and you'll be fine!
Good luck

AMEN Finally parents who don't want a 2 or 3 year diapers. I am a mother of 3 I had my kids in the 80's, I started my first child ay 20 months by 21 months he was done. For him he loved the price is right so i always put him on the potty in the living room during the price is right, I also used reward and discipline, I had a pretty clear se through jar that i kept filled with m&m's and each time he went he got 3 to 3 m&m's. I also took him to the store and let hime pick out his own big boy underwear, back then it was Thundercats, Batman, GiJoe, he was always a very obedient child mom said use the potty he used the potty, my second child was 19 months for him he didn't want to wear diapers, he wanted to wear big boy underwear like his brother, I told he had to use the potty like hi brother, at that time my older son was usuing the toilet, and my daughter i started between 19 and 20 months but i put it on hold only becasue we had got orders to mover over seas and with all that inteled I jjust decided to wait til we got to Japan, she was 22 months, all 3 of my kids were dry in the mornings at 17 months old. Where are you a dance instructor? my daughter is a dancer. J. L.

My daughter was potty trained by 20mos. and my son is 20mos. now and I am in the process with him. I started a little later with my son but he is doing great. With my daughter I had her with nothing on for the first couple days so she can be aware of what her body does. Then I had the training undies. It only took her two weeks before she had no accidents. Don't get me wrong, she had accidents every now and then. You need to make sure that you have at least one to two weeks that you don't have anything planned and can spend the majority of time at home. I just started with my son and he prefers the toilet rather than the small potty. He is doing so good. When he does go I give him a treat (raisins, teddy graham) Now that he is doing really well with the pee, I only give him a treat when he does the other. I still praise him a whole bunch but I know eventually I have to stop the treats anyways and the sooner the better. Also, don't force it. You don't want your child to be afraid of the potty or you. And if he sits on it and doesn't go, still praise him for trying but make sure it's not in a as high pitch voice as when he actually does go. With my daughter I used more force and with my experience I think the more laid back way is the best approach. I hope this helped and good luck.

Dear S.,

Well, if you and your husband and the rest of the family were potty trained early, very probably your son will catch on early too. I am not truly sure, but I think that the skill is learned when a person's muscles and nerves are mature enough to warn the child, and he needs to be interested too. You will probably have an easy time, but this is all I know. C. N.

Hi Shephanie,
I looked at the other responses and thought that of all of them Laurie D. was the one that I would choose. Back when we trained our children we started at their first Birthday or within a few months of it. Stay consistant and on top of it. Praise his successes and encourage his non-sucesses.
Good Luck to you.

LIZ

Hi there..so I see you got some very strong replies up until now..LOL. Some people take this thing WAY to seriously. If their kid is trained early they brag. if their kid is late, they bitch and blame. Well, really it isnt a competition or race. It's about you an your kid. I personally never really "potty trained" my daughter. I babysat many of kids over the years, was a live in nanny, and did in-home caycare for a period of a total of 10 years, so I knew all the porblems kids have learning to potty. The one that worried me the most with my own child was when parents waited too long to introduce the potty most times their kid was scared of ti. So that did worry me, and the other that worried me were parents who waited so long that thier kid was already comfortable pooping in diapers to care. I babysat one boy who wasnt potty trained at 3.5 and I was not about to keep changing poopy diapers on a kid whose poo looked and smelled liek a grown man.

So in my experiance. I decided to buy a little potty jane potty when my daughter was about 8 months. Mainly becaue everytime I put her in the tub, she'd pee. So it was a very relaxed thing. I sat her on the potty while I filled the tub and honestly 9 out of 10 times, she relaxed listening to the water and reading her little book so much before her bath, she'd pee in the potty. That wasnt a victory cause it's not liek she knew she was doing it. She even pooped a couple times just cause she was relaxed. Yeah I did cartwheels but really I knew it wasnt anything learned..just practiced. Anyhow this was a habbit that was formed and no fear of the potty was ever a problem. My daughter didnt even start walking till 14 months so you cant go potty if you cant walk. so at around 18 months she would tell me she had to go peepee because after all the time of knowing that the feeling she was having when she pee'd in that potty was called pee pee..she would say Pee pee. Sometimes I'd catch it other times not. But honestly I would just ask her periodically if she ha to go pee and I'd take her with. I never forced her or had any unrealistic goals. Just let her go at her own pace..cause you will never force a kid to go potty, plain and simple. We bought our last diaper at 22months and by 25months..she wa done. She'd go to the bathroom all alone and did it. To mak it easier we had a potty in the laundry room which is closer to her play room than the bathroom and we also had a potty in our bathroom and hers. That way there was no far run for her. No matter where she was, it was convenient. Anyhow, by the time my new baby was born when she was 2.5 she was completly done. Pee, poop, and no leaks, even at night she wakes up. I feel if you dont force it and introduce them to the potty early enough it can happen. Yeah, my mom goes on and on about how I was potty trained by 18 months too..but you know back then times were different. They can take their time now...but I dont understand people who allow their kids to be 3 and 4 and not have a potty. Good luck to you and Patience...just a gentle reminder every hour is enough. ;O)

hi S., i potty trained my 5 year old right when she turned two. however, i had been putting her on the potty since she was 8 months old just for the experience every now and then so when potty learning came around it wasn't all new. we used the timer method. we planned to stay home for three days and that was my only focus. during the day every 30-45 min we set the timer and i would excitedly say "potty time, yay" and we would run to the potty and try to go. we did not use pull ups when at home, only out and about. by the third day she was day-time potty trained. my advice would be to start if you want and when you really feel that your son is ready go for it. basically, pee pee in the diaper is a habit. some people have used a diaperless or early potting learning from birth (brave folks). don't worry what anyone else thinks if you decide to go earlier or later. it really is a matter of you and your son. also, cloth diapers help. they can feel when they are wet. i am in the cloth diapering business so if you or a friend need any cloth....

best,
S.
www.beachbummies.com

2 of my 5 sons were fully potty trained before their 2nd birthdays. First of all, they had the muscle control, which doesn't always come that early. Neither of you will be able to control that. Second, they were emotionally ready. Being strong willed children it had to be their idea, not mine. They enjoyed sitting on the potty from the very first chance.

Now, with my other 3 sons I am the one who had to become potty trained. I had to know when it was time for them to go. I had to physically take them and sit in the room with them until they were done. It was frequently a struggle. Lots of tears were shed from both the kids and mommy! All of them were fully trained by 3. On one son we even went back to diapers for 3 months and started over.

It probably was nothing to do with anything, but I do find it interesting that it's my most "academically inclined" boys who had the hardest time with potty training. They still get distracted by whatever grabs their mind. They no longer pee their pants over it, but they still ignore current demands because their mind needs to absorb something interesting.

Good Luck!

We also started training our son via the bath. We noticed that each night when we put him in the bath, that he would go potty, so we decided to start putting him on the potty each night before his bath. Once he got comfortable doing this, we started asking him during the day if he needed to go potty, and continued from there. He is now almost four, and completely potty trained, even at night (which, he pretty much took care of himself!) If you start them early, I believe it s easier for all involved. Just try not to push too hard. Let him go at his own pace. One other bit of advice, not sure about your son, but my son wanted nothing to do with a "potty", he wanted to use the toilet like we did, so I just bought a padded seat for him to use (one with a splash guard!) and he was happy as a clam! I don't remember exactly how old he was, but he was under two.

Hope this helps! Good luck!

Hi S.:
I understand your eagerness to get your son out of diapers,but keep in mind, your son needs to be mature enough to regognize he has movements. Remember,he has grown acustom to doing what he needs to in a diaper since birth.There is no reason for him to believe that what hes doing is wrong or that he should do things any different than he has. Up till now, mommy has changed his diapers and acted like everything was AOK.I will never understand why they call it (potty training) (You aren't training him,unless he wants to learn)You can try teaching him,but as they say...Children will only learn what they want to,and when they want to.I guess you could attempt to speed things up, by distributing disapline,but the experts have proven that counter-productive,and toddlers tend to relapse,when theres fear of failure,and consequences.If your son appears ready or interested in using the potty,then by all means...praise him for it,and brag on him in front of dad.Don't make the mistake of coming across (pushy) or like you expect perfect results in a short time.He will feel rushed,and when he has accidents,embarrassed that he somehow disapointed you.Time and patients S..I started my sons on the regular toilet with a pad,because the boys seemed to feel more comfortable with that. They never feared they would fall in,and it certainly saved another bothersome transition for them.If they start on a normal toilet, then it will save you and them alot of trouble when your out. When toddlers get use to a little porta potty on the floor,then its very hard to get them to use any regular toilet out in public.You'll be at a store,he will have to go,and refuse to sit on the big toilet. You'll wind up having to drive all the way home so he can go on his!Most kids want so badly to please,they will get on the toilet ,sit for a few minutes, smiling ear to ear because they are so proud of themselves, only to get off and within a short time go in their pants! They don't understand,that their body didn't produce a movement.The idea is to keep them there long enough to help them realize what they are sitting there for.I use to leave a few of my sons favorite books in the bathroom,and hand him one to look at.He would ask me to read sometimes,and I sure didn't mind,if it helped relax him,and kept him there for a few more minutes.I never really gave it much thought,but My hubbys mom must have used the same method....Hes always reading on the darn pot!!lol I wish you and your son the best. J.

Here's a great tip that worked on my 7 kids!
http://www.gomommygo.com/pottytraining.html
If you got to the home page
http://www.gomommygo.com
there are tips on other things as well!
Enjoy,
R.

I think this topic is one that holds a great deal of emotion. I worked in childcare centers in high school, Nannied in college, and all my kids I got potty trained around their 2nd birthday. When my own came, I thought sure no problem, I'll do the same for this one, no big deal. Then my daughter had epilepsy, and is developmentally delayed. Now while most children don't have this problem, it really made me realize, that you need to let the child decide for themselves when they are ready. I think exposing your infant to what we do in the potty is great at a young age, in steps. Say come see mommy sit on the potty. Listen while mommy does pee pee. Then mommy flushes the toilet...etc. I've found that with my own, she would know that she was supposed to sit, but didn't know what to do next. I Really Really think the child has a built in clock, and as long as you expose and encourage without ever getting angry about time lines your child will succeed. Please, take it from a mom with a special needs child, Every child learns at a different rate, and each child has their strengths and weaknesses. Expose your child and talk about it, but don't get discouraged if it takes a little while. Good luck, and no stress for you, it really isn't a contest!

Check out Elimination Communication - diaperfreebaby.org. There are yahoo groups for support.
We did it with our son and it was wonderful!! Your son may be a bit old for this method (usually start from birth to about 10 months), but it's something to look into for next time.

We started by having my son go on his potty every night before the bath. That was a good way to introduce it to him. Low stress for him and just natural. Keep in mind that until 18 months they don't really have control over when they go or even notice that they are going. And boys don't really start talking much until 18 months so you may want to teach him the sign. 18 months to 2 is, of course, a good age to train but anything before that seems to be more a training of the parent than of the kid.

I also agree to early potty training and trust me it is worthwhile. I was potty trained at 16mths day & night, so it can be done. I began putting my little boy who is now 3yrs, on the potty once he started to sit up, around 7mths. He very quickly got the hang of it and from 7mths stopped poohing in his nappy. He continued to wear nappies throughout the day & night and when he was almost 20mths I decided to take them off completely. It took about 1 week and he only ever had 3 accidents. I would ask him every 15mins or so if he needed to go, did not bother with pull-ups. He wore undies and a t-shirt (summer time) and I would leave the potty where he could easily access it. During the training week, every time he went, we would have a little song & dance, never gave him any sweets/treats. He also liked to have a couple of toys and books while he was sitting on the potty.
The main thing is to be constant and pursue with it. It may take a few days, it may take mths. Also forget about going out, unless necessary, you need to stay at home. goodluck

I have only one potty trained child so far since my daughter is just 16 months old.

My son who is now 3.5 years old is finally potty trained. We started at 16 months. He was always interested in the potty and liked to be in the bathroom with us when we went. I would take him to the potty every couple of hours, when I went, when DH went, and about 30 minutes after a meal. So it worked out be about 1-2 hours throughout the day. It was hit and miss. If he was sitting on the potty at the right time, he would go. We did this for about a month.

Then I got pregnant with my daughter and was so nauseated all day that potty training got put on the back burner.

At 19 months my son started preschool and that really kicked potty training back into gear since they would take the kids on a regular basis to the potty.

But honestly, although my son had the physical capability to potty train at age 2, he didn't really "get it" until just before his 3rd birthday. Only then would he go on his own when he had to go. We still remind him to go before we leave the house and before bedtime and we will still see him doing the "potty dance" at times and have to practically force him to the potty when he is engrossed in something. But from age 2-3, he would usually go on the potty if we took him, he just didn't recognize the sensation of having to go on his own until just before he turned 3. Now at 3.5 we are almost at the stage where we can get rid of the nighttime pullups as he is getting up on his own (at the wee hours of 5 and 6am) to go to the potty in the morning on his own.

I also thought I would get him potty trained at an early age, but my experience with my son has taught me to really rely on my child's cues. If I did that from the get go it would have saved me a lot of stress and frustration and time on the cleaning up the accidents.

Now with my daughter who is 16 months old, she definitely isn't ready to potty train yet. My son was always on the fast track developmentally (teething at 4 months, crawling at 6 months, walking at 12 months, talking at an early age, etc.). My daughter is on the slower side of things. She takes her time, but when she gets it, she learns things FAST (crawling at 11 months, teething at 12 months, walking at 13 months, talking at 15 months, etc.). So I am hoping that within the next 6 months or so she will show an interest in the potty (she always goes to the bathroom with us whenever any of us have to go) and hopefully watching her big brother and some of our friends kids going to the potty will help her get interested in it. But if not, I am not going to stress out about it.

Like my pediatrician said to me once "Most kids walk and talk by age 2, and most kids potty train by age 5, so don't stress about it."

So give it a go with your child, but if you find yourself getting stressed or your child is getting stressed about it, take a break and try it again a few months later. Eventually with repetition and when they are ready, your child will potty train.

YEAA! I loved reading your post because most potty training posts are for 2-4 year olds NOT potty trained and it kinda grosses me out! :)
I started potty training my son at 14 months. We introduced it then talked about it daily and he was going pee pee before bath, before bed and when he first got up in the morning till he was 16 months old. at 16 months i tried fully potty training him and he was just not quite ready, but we never stopped talking and using the potty. By 21 months we tried again and by 22 months he was potty trained!! And now he is 3 and doing great! My daughter just turned 1 and i am going to do the same with her.
Good luck and i am proud of you for being on top of it!

I have 3 kids all were different. I think with kids who are potty trained very early - it is more the parents who are trained. I did pick up a book from the library with my last one (my son)- "Stress Free Potty Training". It was good with helping determine my sons personality and how to approach it. Actually, he was just about potty trained when I got the book - he is 27 months. He only took about 2-3 days but the book helped enforce my approach. He almost trained himself. He was getting ready for a bath one night, running around naked and the next minute I turned around - he was on the potty going #2. The next day he wanted to sit on the potty (which he had done many times before but nothing came out) and he actually went a little at first, then a little more and then even more (I could see the little light bulb go off in his head as he figured out he could control it).

Now if kids don't have the muscle control there really is not too much you can do for that. Just give them time. My oldest was pretty quick as well. It took me just deciding enough was enough since I knew she was ready. All the signs were there - it was more me. I thought my second daughter would be so easy since she was saying three word sentences by 13 months and complete sentences by 18 months but I WAS SO WRONG! She was my most challenging. Intellegence has nothing to do with body/muscle control. It took me a long time to learn that and accept it.

As I said, that book helped be determine my sons personality and showed me that I was approaching it correctly with him. All kids are different so a little different approach might be needed. What works for one my not work for all - which I figured out with my 3 kids.

Best of luck to you!